Vanilla vs non-Vanilla Sex

[AnnyMouse28]

I have started a new relationship. Things are going great. We are taking things slowly, at my request. The other night he asked me where on the sex "spectrum" I am. I told him in the past that I describe myself as "French Vanilla." I don't have any kinks or fetishes but am very open to trying different things. I asked him the same question and keeping with the ice cream analogy he said he is more of Neapolitan.

So my question to all of you is this. What do you consider Vanilla sex vs non-Vanilla sex?

Bonus question, keeping with the Ice Cream analogy? What flavor are you?

 

[J_Bone]

Don’t worry about it and don’t overthink it.

Best advice I can give is be yourself AND drop any inhibitions you might have as best you can.

Men love free uninhibited lovers. Don’t be afraid to be verbal, but only when you feel it. Dirty talk is great, but only when natural and not contrived.

Just go with the flow and what comes naturally with no preconceived ideas or expectations.

 

[AnnyMouse28]

I am not worried about it. I am very comfortable with how I am sexually. We have discussed the one "issue" I have.

I am really just curious what others think of vanilla vs non-vanilla sex.

 

[J_Bone]

I am not worried about it. I am very comfortable with how I am sexually. We have discussed the one "issue" I have.

I am really just curious what others think of vanilla vs non-vanilla sex.

I guess reading between the lines, I mean inhibited = vanilla; uninhibited = nonvanilla

 

[Wonderer67]

So my question to all of you is this. What do you consider Vanilla sex vs non-Vanilla sex?

When I think of vanilla, I think of traditional intercourse.

That doesn’t mean it can’t be awesome. Vanilla has lots of flavor too… it doesn’t have no taste.

My wife helps me w my kinks, but she is fairly vanilla. Likes trad sex. She’s Ok w oral (giving and receiving) and we have a great sex life. She has a very strong sex drive.

(In fact we just finished a great mutual masturbation session… she’s asleep now…)

Non vanilla:
She helps me out with my kinks. Orgasm control. Male submission. Sometimes we engage in some water sports. We do go to nude resorts and beaches.

But she likes and prefers more traditional sex and mutual masturbation.

I wish you and your partner a lot of room together to explore the plethora of “ice cream flavors.” It’s fun!!

 

[NaughtyPartyGirl]

Personally, I prefer chocolate with whipped cream., but a scoop of vanilla will work in a pinch!

 

[ConfusinglyDelerious]

So my question to all of you is this. What do you consider Vanilla sex vs non-Vanilla sex?

I have honestly stopped considering. There is "only missionary for the sole purpose of procreation" on one end of the spectrum, and there is "I can't cum unless my arm is stuck in a bear trap and somebody is spanking me with week-old celery from the vegetable drawer" somewhere faaar over the horizon from what I consider to be "normal" or "fine", and in between there are as many little nuances as there are people out there.

I know people who are adamant that they do not have "any kinks", who I would consider service subs who get off from pleasing. She would consider herself a "vanilla" kind of girl, and I would say that she definitely enjoys what a lot of people would consider a mildly submissive sort of role. I don't think my label of them is any better or worse than the label they apply to themselves.

(Honestly, based on the time I once spent involved with a online BDSM community, I think there are people who get off on discussing the specificity of different labels on the internet, more than any other act in the world...)

Bonus question, keeping with the Ice Cream analogy? What flavor are you?

Pistachio with salty pistachio nut chunks.

 

[Fingerfuxs]

I have started a new relationship. Things are going great. We are taking things slowly, at my request. The other night he asked me where on the sex "spectrum" I am. I told him in the past that I describe myself as "French Vanilla." I don't have any kinks or fetishes but am very open to trying different things. I asked him the same question and keeping with the ice cream analogy he said he is more of Neapolitan.

So my question to all of you is this. What do you consider Vanilla sex vs non-Vanilla sex?

Bonus question, keeping with the Ice Cream analogy? What flavor are you?

Congratulations good for you. Best wishes in hopefully being compatible with each others life goals. With any luck not only as lovers if that happens , but as well as being friends that share emotions.

Imo , vanilla = not really being in tune with the other person sexually, for better or worst. Limited conversations about kinks or possible fetishes. Mostly because it would embarrass either person’s ability to be an open book with the other.

Non -vanilla = being in tune so much physically and mentally that it’s incredible and both are open books with boundaries that are easily established in conversation. Orgasm goals are humorist conversations and easy pillow talk as well as trust discretion in regards to fetish or kink talk. Both actual know what CNC is as an example. Or ENM as another example.


I can’t really assign an ice cream flavor to myself in this situation because it seems out dated as a sexuality metaphor to me.

But I will go with an ice cream sandwich instead , I’m a Klondike bar !

Finger

 

[AnnyMouse28]

Congratulations good for you. Best wishes in hopefully being compatible with each others life goals. With any luck not only as lovers if that happens , but as well as being friends that share emotions.

But I will go with an ice cream sandwich instead , I’m a Klondike bar !

Finger

Thank you. I am cautiously optimistic.

So that leads to the question - what would you do for a Klondike bar?

 

[Treeview]

Orange sherbert w choco chunks

 

[Fingerfuxs]

Thank you. I am cautiously optimistic.

So that leads to the question - what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Hahaha what would I do for a Klondike bar ? Well , firstly I wouldn’t do anything deviant without consent or knowing boundaries that are in play.

The actual vanilla answer , anything silly I suppose , or humorous.

Finger

 

[Titsandclits]

I spent many years in a vanilla relationship, it was so vanilla that it was almost tasteless. I am now working towards expanding my horizons and want more tasty flavours. Love Phish Food, but my hands down all time favourite is Butterscotch.

 

[Handeguy]

Vanilla to me is very traditional, limited to manual and maybe oral stimulation followed by vaginal intercourse. As other posters have mentioned, vanilla can be very good. I mean, who doesn't like a scoop of vanilla ice cream on a hot summer day? I am a bit more adventurous in my tastes, however. In terms of the ice cream analogy, maybe a decadent French vanilla with big chunks of dark chocolate and peanut butter cups, topped with hot fudge, peanut butter sauce, and whipped cream.

 

[AlexBailey]

Ben and Jerry’s would have to make a flavor just for me. It would be have to be a wild combination of something like ‘candy shop floor’ and ‘two twisted’ to represent my sexuality.

Still vanilla is always a good go to, though even that comes in many varieties and qualities - French vanilla bean is far superior to some generic store brand.

 

[Shady_nz]

French Vanilla...with a side of nuts

 

[forgotmyantidepressants]

Vanilla with sprinkles

 

[drobert44]

Well, when U are from Kansas, vanilla is damn near the only flavor....

 

[Taegul]

I'll take non-vanilla, please.

https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.thefamouspeople.com%2Fprofiles%2Fthumbs%2Fvanilla-ice-8.jpg&f=1&nofb=1&ipt=16c680d37e89989273d82ac0bbc273ba412c73b5ca08ec363cde7ef6b44dbda2&ipo=images

Word to ya mutha!

 

[AnnyMouse28]

I'll take non-vanilla, please.

https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.thefamouspeople.com%2Fprofiles%2Fthumbs%2Fvanilla-ice-8.jpg&f=1&nofb=1&ipt=16c680d37e89989273d82ac0bbc273ba412c73b5ca08ec363cde7ef6b44dbda2&ipo=images

Word to ya mutha!

I'll skip the Vanilla Ice myself.

 

[MischiefMakerAlways]

So my question to all of you is this. What do you consider Vanilla sex vs non-Vanilla sex?

Bonus question, keeping with the Ice Cream analogy? What flavor are you?

Like others, there are shades of vanilla, but to me, they all have the following in common:
1. Penis in vagina intercourse. This could be missionary, doggy, cowgirl, or a basic variation of these.
2. Pace/rhythm. Nothing super slow and sensual, and nothing really hard and fast. The middle space that's so-so.
3. Toys, or lack thereof. Owning a simple bullet vibe is the extent, and almost never used with a partner. Anything else would be "embarrassing."
4. Porn usage, or acknowledging the use of. If there is no erotica, porn, sexy content usage or sharing - especially with the partner, that's vanilla.
5. No anal, or only for an extremely "special" occasion. Especially no butt play on a guy.
6. Limited, infrequent oral sex. Being "grossed out" by any sort of ejaculate.

Outside of the above moves away from vanilla, in my opinion.

I'm not one flavor, I'm most of the ice cream parlor. Of the 31 flavors, there are only a few I won't try. 8 guess I'm the flavor of the week.

I'll take non-vanilla, please.

https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.thefamouspeople.com%2Fprofiles%2Fthumbs%2Fvanilla-ice-8.jpg&f=1&nofb=1&ipt=16c680d37e89989273d82ac0bbc273ba412c73b5ca08ec363cde7ef6b44dbda2&ipo=images

Word to ya mutha!

When did we start posting selfies here?

 

[AnnyMouse28]

Like others, there are shades of vanilla, but to me, they all have the following in common:
1. Penis in vagina intercourse. This could be missionary, doggy, cowgirl, or a basic variation of these.
2. Pace/rhythm. Nothing super slow and sensual, and nothing really hard and fast. The middle space that's so-so.
3. Toys, or lack thereof. Owning a simple bullet vibe is the extent, and almost never used with a partner. Anything else would be "embarrassing."
4. Porn usage, or acknowledging the use of. If there is no erotica, porn, sexy content usage or sharing - especially with the partner, that's vanilla.
5. No anal, or only for an extremely "special" occasion. Especially no butt play on a guy.
6. Limited, infrequent oral sex. Being "grossed out" by any sort of ejaculate.

Outside of the above moves away from vanilla, in my opinion.

If this is a definitive list then I am definitely in the French vanilla category. But mostly due to not being exposed to more Neapolitan sexual flavors.

 

[MischiefMakerAlways]

If this is a definitive list then I am definitely in the French vanilla category. But mostly due to not being exposed to more Neapolitan sexual flavors.

There is nothing definitive about my opinion, and it's just that, an opinion. I'm willing to wager that the more distance someone has from "vanilla" then the more things they will categorize as such. Conversely, those that don't experiment, will find many more things off limits or taboo than the less-vanilla crowd.

 

[DannieB]

Neapolitan with chocolate mint and nuts and sprinkles with chocolate and caramel syrup. And maybe throw in some cherries and potato chips. You never know until you try. Otherwise you’re stuck with plain vanilla.

 

[SherlockianMan]

I would love something other than vanilla. Hell, sometimes I feel like all I've gotten in recent years is dairy-free vanilla flavored. Somehow more expensive yet less satisfying.

 

[MischiefMakerAlways]

I would love something other than vanilla. Hell, sometimes I feel like all I've gotten in recent years is dairy-free vanilla flavored. Somehow more expensive yet less satisfying.

You're getting ice cream? The ice cream truck hasn't been here in over 2.5 years!