Valued Involvement (Closed for Bluntitis)

[Becaa57]

I stare at the letter in my hand from my ex husbands lawyer, telling me that my ex has once again avoided having to pay back alimony. Even after I'd provided all the documentation they asked for. My lawyer is not worth the money I pay him.
Staring out the window I wonder how I got to this point in life. I met my ex in high school we dated for a few years, then when I got pregnant he stepped up and did the right thing. We married and even though it struggled I thought we were doing ok. Then after our kids got into their late teens I discovered he'd been cheating on me for years with different women. I thought was a easy case right?
Well problem was he had all the money and I was totally financially dependent on him, I couldn't afford a good lawyer and he could. Long story short I got screwed in court. Even though the court awarded me alimony for 10 years, he only paid the first year.

I notice my neighbor pulling into his driveway, I remember he was a lawyer, retired after his wife passed. I thought maybe he can give me some advice. Fixing my hair and putting on some makeup. I walk across the street and ring his bell.

"Hi I'm Sally from across the street, I know we haven't talked much but I have a legal problem I'd just like some advice on. Not asking you to go to court for me, just look at this and tell me if I've got a chance to fight it. I hate asking like this, but I can't afford my lawyer anymore"

 

[Bluntitis]

The last years my life has changed dramatically. After my wife died unexpectedly on a ruptured aorta, I had a hard time. We had plans to go traveling together after my retirement. I retired as planned six months ago. But I don't want to travel alone and I'm not suitable for group travel. So I postponed travelling. The university thank God asked me to give guest lectures. I am professor in international law. The Israeli intervention in Gaza takes much of my time. I receive a lot of requests to appear in the media as well.
When I come home I see my neighbour, I think her name is Sally, coming to my door. It is the first time I receive a lady in the house after my wife Mary died. She wants legal advice about her alimony. That’s not my specialty, but first I want to comfort her.

“Sit down please Sally. It’s sad that you have sorrows over your finances. I really feel sorry for you. Do you want a drink?”

 

[Becaa57]

"Thank you yes a glass of wine or a mixed drink?"
Looking around I see pictures of you and your wife, obviously a loving couple.

"A lot of this is my fault I guess, just too trusting and I'd hoped we would have a amicable divorce, however money got in the way of that."

Taking a breath wondering what was I thinking. Lawyers don't just give out advice for free, but I am at my wits end. Even if he just say's you're screwed at least I will know.

"I am sure that this isn't in your area of expertise, but I have several documents back at the house, if you could just look them over and ohhh god I don't know. Give me an idea if there is anything I can do."

 

[Bluntitis]

I really feel sorry for her. She sits at the dining room table with hunched shoulders from the stress. I put my hand on her shoulder.

"Sally relax, take a breath and drop your shoulders. There is always a solution to be found! What can I offer you? I'm not much of a drinker, but I've got beer, red and white wine. Or shall I mix you a gin tonic?"

I really do not understand how it could have come to this. How is it possible that her ex has not paid alimony for nine years? It's not my cup of tea, but I can't bring myself not to reassure her and give her some kind of advice. To start with, let me ask a few simple questions so that she can tell her story. That is often a relief.

"After I have provided us with drinks I would like to hear from you what happened when your ex stopped paying alimony nine years ago."

 

[Becaa57]

I try not to cry, your hands are comforting.
"Wine please a gin and tonic would hit me too hard"

"He paid fairly regularly for maybe the 1st year, then he'd 'forget to mail the check' or being having some financial problems. Then he just stopped, said the kids are old enough, and this was when they like 12"

Taking a sip of the wine.

"After about 6 months, I went to my lawyer and he said He'd look into it. Then told my that my ex had filed something that put the payments on hold. I got that story or similar ones for about 6 years, then I could no longer afford the lawyer"

"Now he is asking for repayment of the money he paid"

 

[Bluntitis]

I also take a glass of wine, which I normally don’t do except in weekends. But under these circumstances I want to comfort Sally. Drinking the same thing creates a bond.

“I must say, your lawyer reacted at least inadequate. He should have taken action to ensure that the alimony was actually paid. If your ex felt that his circumstances had changed so that he could no longer pay, he should have asked for the court ruling to be changed. That’s all I can tell you now. I will come to you tomorrow to examine the paperwork.”

Looking at you I don’t see much relief. I can’t change a situation and I sit here empty handed.

“Sally, I wish I could help you, but I don’t want to give you false hope. This isn’t settled in a minute. Shall I poor you an other glass?”

 

[Becaa57]

I blow out some air
"Thanks I don't know what I was expecting honestly. I guess just needed someone to talk too. I don't really have any friends here and you always at least would wave at me"

"Taking the 2nd glass of wine. I am sorry for your loss, I can imagine losing a spouse is incredibly hard"

"Maybe we can just sit and talk some? I don't want to keep you if you're busy"

 

[Bluntitis]

“Please do, come to the living with me and make yourself comfortable on the couch.”

I sit down in an armchair opposite the couch.

“I miss my wife and when I am alone at home I can’t imagine she lived here with me. Now you sit on the couch close to me it is as if I can feel her again. Although she was blond and you are a brunette you look quite similar. You are just a bit taller than she was and a little slimmer. Eh … Sorry, this should make you feel weird. I got carried away.”

It must me the wine that makes me sentimental. I should end this visit and prepare some food. The wine hits in hard on a empty stomach, John thinks. Hope she doesn’t think I became a weirdo living alone.

 

[Becaa57]

I listen as you talk about your wife. It's obvious that you loved her and miss her, but also have been very lonely since she passed.
When you mention that you're afraid it will sound weird. I shake my head.

"No actually makes perfect sense.

"You're alone most of the time, I'm guessing I'm the first woman to sit here since well in a long time? I can see how it would remind you of her, when she was here."

Looking around I see you keep the house clean and picked up.

"Kind of similar for me, I don't miss my husband, him leaving was the best thing he'd ever done for me. But I do get lonely sometimes and to have another person who is not my child to talk too. Well I can't remember the last time I did that."

"Don't get me wrong, I have dated some, usually disastrous, but on a date you are always on guard, watching what you say how you look, showing too much boob, not enough etcetera. Here it's just me and you sitting sharing a quiet moment. I like it."

Looking at the time I see it's getting late.

"Have you had dinner? I have a chicken in the oven, would love it if you could come over and eat with me. I'm not a fancy cook, but I think I do good with the chicken?"

"No pressure, and no looking at any of my legal papers, just a quiet evening"

 

[Bluntitis]

In my mourning, I have closed myself off from my surroundings. I didn't know I had such a nice neighbor. We have casual contact and that puts me at ease.

"I haven't arranged anything for dinner yet. Very nice to invite me, I gladly accept your invitation. But it was a long day, so don't expect too much from me in terms of fun. I don't make it very late either. I'm curious about your experiences with dates. I'm not ready for that yet. A trip to the other side of the street is already a lot for me ha, ha. Shall I walk with you or do you need some time?"

 

[Becaa57]

I'm relieved and nervous when you accept my offer, I made it without thinking, but I got a nice feeling just talking to him.

"Wonderful, oh and don't worry about the fun part, my last couple of dates made if very clear I'm not a fun date. So maybe we are a good match tonight. And of course stay as long as you want, I'm not a late night person either"

Thinking about the condition of the house, deciding it will pass inspection.

"Why not walk with me, will give the neighbors a bit less to talk about and that way neither of us can back out. Maybe bring that bottle of wine?"

 

[Bluntitis]

“Okay, I will take the bottle with us. Should prevent us from uncorking another. We will cross the street with it. I wonder what the neighbors think if they see both of us with a bottle of wine crossing the street”, I cuckle.

I close the door behind us and we walk to your front door.

“Sally, be confident! You are good company. I appreciate your spontaneous invitation. Now I don’t have time to worry about the impression I will make on you. After two years having contact with a woman out of a professional setting makes me feel a bit awkward. After Vanessa died I threw myself into my work. That didn’t go to well. I haven't been able to come to terms with her death. Since I am retired it goes better. I allow myself to think about her. My attitude towards women will normalize, I don’t want to feel guilty towards Vanessa.”

I am not sure if I express clearly enough what my feelings are towards you. It’s not my intention to put a burden on you because my wife died. I want to give you a positive vibe, you have troubles enough yourself. I care for you and I want to help you.

 

[Becaa57]

"Thank you to say that. I know why they said I wasn't a fun date, but still it hurts"
As we walk across the street

"Never thought about you carrying that bottle to my place, wonder what the neighbors will think? Old Mrs. Olsen probably putting us down as wino's "

We reach the door and I hesitate before opening it.

"My place isn't as nice as yours, the furniture is well lets just say well used. But I hope you feel comfortable here. I think we both need a friend with no pressures"

Showing you in.
"The dining room is back here, if you want I have wine glasses in the china cabinet. I'll go rescue that chicken"

Pulling the chicken out of the oven, putting it to rest as I quickly make up a salad for us. Fortunately I had one of those bag salads, that works good for two. I add some tomato and avocado to it.
Setting another place at the table.

"Lets sit in the living room for a bit, the chicken needs 10-15 minutes before we carve it

Leading you to the couch having a seat

 

[Bluntitis]

It is visible that you have less to spend than I do. But the house is clean and the décor is bright and timeless. I feel right at home here.
I take to glasses out of the china cabinet and pour the wine. When you come out of the kitchen I hand you a glass.

“Sally, thanks for inviting me. I appreciate your friendship! Come and sit with me. I am curious, what keeps you busy in life?”

 

[Becaa57]

I sip the wine.
"What keeps me busy. Mostly work honestly I have 1 1/2 jobs during the day I'm office manager for a company downtown. But a couple nights a week, I wait tables at a little diner. I think actually you've been in there"

looking around the house

"When the kids lived with me, I had a lot going on with them, their friends and what all. But with them both away in school, my nights and weekends are empty"

"What about you, what keeps you busy? You are retired??"

 

[Bluntitis]

“I must feel ashamed. You need more than a normal job to come around. I am retired but work voluntarily twenty hours a week. I give guest lectures and still write legal books. Financially I am independent, there is no mortgage on the house anymore. So, I had a lot of time to mourn. I realize it’s time to socialize with other people. This evening is a good start. That’s why I am so happy with your invitation.”

I take a sip of the wine.

“You look fit. Waiting tables can be tough. Besides that do you sport? I ride my bike and hike once a week. When I was with Vanessa we had a dog. That was our child. She died five years ago after a happy life. I can’t have a dog now, I am to much away from home.”

 

[Becaa57]

"Don't be ashamed!!! You've worked hard to be where you are in life. You keep busy and continue to contribute to society. My life isn't so bad, the part time job is actually as much of a favor to a friend who own's the diner as it is for the money."

"I admit I am not sitting pretty with a big bank account, but honestly I am happier with myself since I divorced him all those years ago. I do wish he'd man up to his responsibilities, but you can't expect a child to do that"

"My children and I have a close relationship, they visit when they can. But I'm not dumb enough to think that they won't find their own significant others and move on. I just hope I can be a grandmom and welcome in their homes"

"I'd love to get a dog, had one growing up and listened to my ex when he said not to get one. Have to think about it, I'm home quite a bit and a dog that doesn't need a ton of exercise would fit into my life very nicely. You'd be able to visit of course!!"

"I think the chicken is ready, I know it's a lot to ask, but would you mind carving it? I generally hack away at them"

 

[Bluntitis]

“If you give me a big knife I will carve the chicken. I will part the legs and cut the chest in two halves. A part of the chest is enough for me.”

I take a bite of the chicken. It is very tasteful, juicy and soft.

“It’s delicious, sometimes chicken becomes dry, this one is very juicy.”

I am tempted to say “I like my chicks juicy”. But of cause I don’t. I get a bit light headed from the wine. After dinner I should go home.

“Good to hear that you are not obliged to wait tables. I will visit the diner some day. Don’t think I have been in town in a diner before.”

 

[Becaa57]

"Thank you, chicken is one of those things that I can cook fairly well. For me the breast is only good the first night, after that it dries out and chicken is one thing you want a juicy breast from "

"I will say the extra money comes in handy, but I knew the owner when we were both in high school, so a female owned business needs all the support it can get."

"You should come in, I'll get you a piece of pie on the house , she makes really good pie, better then mine, or so my kids liked to tell me"

As we eat I think it's nice not to eat alone.

"We need to do this more often, I don't know about you, but dinner alone for me is depressing"

"Can I offer you some desert?"

 

[Bluntitis]

She doesn't blink and parries my quip impassively. I think we are on the same wavelength. That's nice.

“What can you offer for desert ? I am not very fond of too sweet. A black cup of coffee I can appreciate.”

“I guess I have more leisure than you have. It’s surely more rewarding to cook for two. I look forward to invite you to dinner at my place!”

“I will give you my number Sally, we can text or call each other.”

 

[Becaa57]

"Coffee I can do, I also have some pie, I will admit it's day old from the diner"

"Let's move back to the living room, sit on the couch. I know you can't stay long, and that's ok. When you need to, I can say goodbye, for now"

 

[Bluntitis]

After the coffee and a piece of pie with cinnamon, tasty and not to sweet we say good bye. I find that always complicated. Could have given her a kiss on her cheek I suppose, but I am afraid it’s impertinent. I lay a hand on her shoulder and thank her for the lovely evening. Than I cross the street.

When I get home, emptiness overwhelms me. The contrast with the coziness at Sally’s is high. I take a shower and go to bed. Thinking about Sally I miss the physical presence of Vanessa next to me. I grab her pillow and push it against my belly with my legs pulled up. In this way, Vanessa often lay with her buttocks against me. Feeling her presence comforts me. I am lucky to have Sally as a neighbor. Maybe we can build a close relationship.

 

[Becaa57]

Seeing him to the door, that awkward first goodbye. He just touches my arm when thanking me. Nice not too pushy although to be honest I would've enjoyed a hug.

After he is gone I pour a glass of wine and sit, thinking that I hope I've found a new friend. We seem to get along he isn't one of those horny men who expect sex after dinner. I know he is lonely I know I am too. I hope to see him again. Almost sorry that I've asked at this point for legal advice.

Taking a warm shower and slipping into my bed, he is still on my mind as I drift off.

 

[Bluntitis]

The next morning I feel different. I woke up with a pillow in my back and I remembered how I dozed off last night. The sun comes out and I look across the street wondering what today will bring.

After I read the newspaper I go upstairs searching for old Photo albums. There are a lot of albums from holidays in summer camping and in winter skiing. Vanessa looks great in shorts and a t-shirt. She has a nice tan. Her curves resemble those of Sally. Round and female, elegant not chubby. It is okay to see these photos of Vanessa and think back of the time we were together.

Most of the day I work on a legal commentary. I finish it and send it for feedback to a colleague. At the end of the day I text Sally and ask her if she likes to come for dinner tomorrow. Maybe we can watch a movie afterwards.

 

[Becaa57]

I wake up, remembering dinner last night. How nice it was to talk to him, knowing it was just conversations.
I go into the office, a couple people notice I'm smiling more, when they question why I come back with, just woke up in a good mood today, laughing off my one friend who asked if I got laid. Turning down yet another blind date with a friend of her boyfriend.
After the office I go over to the diner and on my way there receive a text from you about dinner. Smiling I respond
"Yes that sounds great!!! Can I bring anything? Wine, pie or???"
The rest of my shift goes much better after that