Vague allusions

[ShelbyDawn57]

Working on a story involving a mother and daughter, where the MC is meeting the mother for the first time. His impression is that she is just like her daughter but up a few notches.
I'm currently using this: "Audrey was her daughter at eleven." alluding to Spinal Tap's, 'But, it's eleven."

My concern is that it's not coming across that way, especially if you don't have a clue who or what Spinal Tap is.
The inclination might then be to think that Audrey is like her daughter was at age eleven, and that is obviously (to me) not where I want to go.

I could use 'on eleven,' or add a qualifier, 'at volume eleven,' but that changes the glib, almost throw away nature of the phrase, and Audrey isn't louder than her daughter, she's just, well, more.

Thoughts, suggestions?

Thanks

 

[CalBishForNow]

I'd say "turned up to eleven." Or if you're worried about that sounding too much like volume, maybe "with all settings turned up to eleven."

 

[StillStunned]

My initial thought for "at eleven" is that it refers to her age.

 

[iwatchus]

My initial thought for "at eleven" is that it refers to her age.

That was my first though too.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

My initial thought for "at eleven" is that it refers to her age.

You're in my head. That's why I'm asking.

I'm kinda stuck on 'at eleven' meaning it's just more...

 

[TheLobster]

My initial thought for "at eleven" is that it refers to her age.

Same thought here.

I'd say "dialed up to eleven," but then again, I'm not particularly subtle.

 

[AwkwardMD]

Another vote for "at eleven" = no way

"Dialed up" is specific enough.

 

[AwkwardMD]

Or something like "if her daughter was an eight, Audrey was an eleven"

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

Thanks, all. I'm going with "Audrey was her daughter cranked up to eleven."

I appreciate the input. It was just enough.

I can delete this or leave it if others would like to argue over how bad my choice was.

 

[StillStunned]

You're in my head.

Don't worry, I won't stay long. I'll just press a few random buttons, spray some graffiti, and then I'm off.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

Don't worry, I won't stay long. I'll just press a few random buttons, spray some graffiti, and then I'm off.

Lots of empty space to work with. Knock yourself out.

 

[Rob_Royale]

Another vote for "at eleven" = no way
"Dialed up" is specific enough.

This was my thought as well. Even those unfamiliar with the amplifier in Spinal Tap have heard of something 'dialed up to eleven'. I've used it in several stories.

 

[NuclearFairy]

I've heard the phrase "turned up to eleven" for years, decades even, and it was only a couple of years ago that I'd even heard of Spinal Tap. Before that I thought it was just kinda an eleven stars out of ten thing, or the same as but even better. Which it still kinda seems like it is.

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Working on a story involving a mother and daughter, where the MC is meeting the mother for the first time. His impression is that she is just like her daughter but up a few notches.
I'm currently using this: "Audrey was her daughter at eleven." alluding to Spinal Tap's, 'But, it's eleven."

My concern is that it's not coming across that way, especially if you don't have a clue who or what Spinal Tap is.
The inclination might then be to think that Audrey is like her daughter was at age eleven, and that is obviously (to me) not where I want to go.

I could use 'on eleven,' or add a qualifier, 'at volume eleven,' but that changes the glib, almost throw away nature of the phrase, and Audrey isn't louder than her daughter, she's just, well, more.

Thoughts, suggestions?

Thanks

Audrey was her daughter, cranked to eleven.

Audrey was 11/10ths of her daughter

Audrey was her daughter ramped up to 11.

 

[Writer61]

Working on a story involving a mother and daughter, where the MC is meeting the mother for the first time. His impression is that she is just like her daughter but up a few notches.
I'm currently using this: "Audrey was her daughter at eleven." alluding to Spinal Tap's, 'But, it's eleven."

My concern is that it's not coming across that way, especially if you don't have a clue who or what Spinal Tap is.
The inclination might then be to think that Audrey is like her daughter was at age eleven, and that is obviously (to me) not where I want to go.

I could use 'on eleven,' or add a qualifier, 'at volume eleven,' but that changes the glib, almost throw away nature of the phrase, and Audrey isn't louder than her daughter, she's just, well, more.

Thoughts, suggestions?

Thanks

How about 11 out of 10?

 

[MrPixel]

I've used "dial cranked to 11".

 

[Bramblethorn]

Agree that the original phrasing sounds like an age reference and "dialed/turned up to eleven" works better.

Or something like "if her daughter was an eight, Audrey was an eleven"

I would probably interpret that as "her daughter was hot but Audrey was unbelievably hot" [not necessarily in the same way]. From the OP I'm not sure whether Shelby is aiming for that, or for "Audrey was just like her daughter but more so".


(annotation not mine, couldn't find a clean copy)

 

[dirk2024]

Thanks, all. I'm going with "Audrey was her daughter cranked up to eleven."

I appreciate the input. It was just enough.

I can delete this or leave it if others would like to argue over how bad my choice was.

How about: Audrey was her daughter cranked up to an eleven.

'Cause I'd still have no idea what you were referring to. But then, I can be oblivious that way.

 

[alohadave]

Make them subtle. People should wonder if that's what you are really alluding to.

Subtle clues give readers a sense of accomplishment. (And if you know that reference, you've been on reddit for a long time.)

 

[iwatchus]

Make them subtle. People should wonder if that's what you are really alluding to.

Subtle clues give readers a sense of accomplishment. (And if you know that reference, you've been on reddit for a long time.)

I have to disagree here, at least for this case. Mistaken allusions about age (and a few other things) have real problems.

 

[HelenL]

Working on a story involving a mother and daughter, where the MC is meeting the mother for the first time. His impression is that she is just like her daughter but up a few notches.
I'm currently using this: "Audrey was her daughter at eleven." alluding to Spinal Tap's, 'But, it's eleven."

My concern is that it's not coming across that way, especially if you don't have a clue who or what Spinal Tap is.
The inclination might then be to think that Audrey is like her daughter was at age eleven, and that is obviously (to me) not where I want to go.

I could use 'on eleven,' or add a qualifier, 'at volume eleven,' but that changes the glib, almost throw away nature of the phrase, and Audrey isn't louder than her daughter, she's just, well, more.

Thoughts, suggestions?

Thanks

At least in the US, "turned up to eleven" has become universal. I certainly knew it before I saw the movie. Keep "turned up to" and you should be fine. (Edited from "you'll be fine" because you never know what someone else will read into the phrase.)

 

[Bazzle]

Working on a story involving a mother and daughter, where the MC is meeting the mother for the first time. His impression is that she is just like her daughter but up a few notches.
I'm currently using this: "Audrey was her daughter at eleven." alluding to Spinal Tap's, 'But, it's eleven."

My concern is that it's not coming across that way, especially if you don't have a clue who or what Spinal Tap is.
The inclination might then be to think that Audrey is like her daughter was at age eleven, and that is obviously (to me) not where I want to go.

I could use 'on eleven,' or add a qualifier, 'at volume eleven,' but that changes the glib, almost throw away nature of the phrase, and Audrey isn't louder than her daughter, she's just, well, more.

Thoughts, suggestions?

Thanks

Turned up to eleven was a Marshal Amp marketing thing. When 10 isn't loud enough.

 

[Five_Inch_Heels]

But I'm still thinking LOUD rather than extreme, or more active.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

But I'm still thinking LOUD rather than extreme, or more active.

Actual context, Cat, the daughter has a libido that our MC is having trouble keeping up with. Audrey, her mom, owns a biker strip club, dances for tips because she likes to be watched, and occasionally sells her body for sex because she likes it and her boyfriend, and partner in the strip club, gets off watching other guys pay his woman for sex.

So, pick a number, and eleven...