Use of "now" in past tense

[SlaveMasterUK]

Warning: This thread contains sentences relating to the topic of authoring!

OK, this is something that's been bothering me for some time. The use of (or how to say) "now" when writing in the past tense. I pretty much exclusively write in 3rd person limited past, and spend most of my time in the thoughts of my main character. I always struggle when trying to create the concept of the present when writing in past tense.

Consider this:

Dave scratched his head nervously. The waiting room was empty, and almost as cold as the winter air outside. Yesterday he had been looking forward to this moment, but now he was not so sure of himself. Was this really the right choice?


Somehow, the word "now" just doesn't seem to fit right when working in past tense. There are other options, but they can sometimes feel forced, and they get very wearing after a few pages. Even in the above text, "this moment" kind of seems out of place.

I ask the grammatical wizards, is this the right way to do it, or is there a way which is, to put say is correctly, nuff more properer..?

 

[impressive]

I've run into the same problem ... and side-stepped it by making the use of time markers into dialogue (either spoken or un-).

 

[Rumple Foreskin]

Warning: This thread contains sentences relating to the topic of authoring!

OK, this is something that's been bothering me for some time. The use of (or how to say) "now" when writing in the past tense. I pretty much exclusively write in 3rd person limited past, and spend most of my time in the thoughts of my main character. I always struggle when trying to create the concept of the present when writing in past tense.

Consider this:

Dave scratched his head nervously. The waiting room was empty, and almost as cold as the winter air outside. Yesterday he had been looking forward to this moment, but now he was not so sure of himself. Was this really the right choice?


Somehow, the word "now" just doesn't seem to fit right when working in past tense. There are other options, but they can sometimes feel forced, and they get very wearing after a few pages. Even in the above text, "this moment" kind of seems out of place.

I ask the grammatical wizards, is this the right way to do it, or is there a way which is, to put say is correctly, nuff more properer..?

Dear SMUK,

There's nothing wrong with using "NOW" when writing in past tense. In situations such as the one in your example, readers accept the idea that "NOW" is used in reference to the narrator's POV and place in the story's space/time continuum, not theirs.

Rumple Foreskin

 

[lil_elvis]

I'm with Rumply. Nuffin wrong with it and it simply keeps the reader advised of the temporal line of the story.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

It's fine as far as I'm concerned. I use it a lot, in fact.

She looked at me now and I saw all that she was feeling right there in her eyes.

That kind of thing.

Kind of reminds me of the word "contemporary" though, which means "of that time" but is often misused to mean "modern." When you say that Shakespeare used "contemporary" techniques, you mean he used techniques common to his time, not modern.

 

[cantdog]

It's completely acceptable and banal. You're being bothered by a rule that doesn't exist. Go forth and sin no less.

 

[Guest]

It's completely acceptable and banal. You're being bothered by a rule that doesn't exist. Go forth and sin no less.

How about sinning more?

 

[elsol]

It's okay as long as you are not using it to mark the passage of time in a sequence.

"Now, she did this."

..
..
..

"She did that now."

I'm not fond of the word so I tend to use the 'If I don't need it, cut it' rule.

YOURS:

Dave scratched his head nervously. The waiting room was empty, and almost as cold as the winter air outside. Yesterday he had been looking forward to this moment, but now he was not so sure of himself. Was this really the right choice?

MY CHANGE:

Dave scratched his head nervously. The waiting room was empty, and almost as cold as the winter air outside. Yesterday, he had been looking forward to this moment, but he was not so sure anymore. Was this really the right choice?

Sincerely,
ElSol

 

[Pure]

now

i'm with rumple, see 6. below. i never knew the work meant so many things besides, 'at the present', for example 'sometimes' [see 4.]

Main Entry: 1now Pronunciation Guide
Pronunciation: (|)na
Function: adverb
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English n; akin to Old High German n, nu now, Old Norse n, Gothic nu, Latin nunc, Greek ny, nyn, Sanskrit n, nu

1 a : at the present time : at this moment <he is busy now> <is now abroad> <is now writing a new play> <he teaches now> b : in the time immediately before the present : very lately : a moment ago <was here just now> <we were thinking of you just now> c : in the time immediately to follow : without delay : FORTHWITH <steps to correct this weakness must be taken now> <must write now or it will be too late>

2 -- used with the sense of present time weakened or lost to express command, request, or admonition <now hear this> <now be a good boy and do as I tell you> <now don't get me angry>

3 -- used with the sense of present time weakened or lost to introduce an important point or indicate a transition from one idea to another <now, this central cord is present in all the vertebrate animals we have so far mentioned -- W.E.Swinton> <now this point of view ... seems to me absolutely unhistorical -- Edmund Wilson>

4 : SOMETIMES <full of pathos and humor, now gay, now sad -- H.H.Reichard> <the foothills roll along on either side, now bare and now wooded -- American Guide Series: Vermont>

5 : under the present conditions : in view of the existing circumstances <after his quick victory over his last opponent, he is now favored to defeat the champion> <since my plan has failed, we must now try his>

6 : at the time under consideration : at the time referred to <the people now proceeded to give him almost every important honor within their gift -- E.M.Coulter> <now the ore is loaded in chutes from towering trestled docks -- Meridel Le Sueur>

7 : reckoning to the present time : by this time <spurned as the lowest form of wit for several centuries now -- Esther K. Sheldon> <a good many years ago now, when I was a soldier -- John Connell>


Citation format for this entry:

"now." Webster's Third New International Dictionary, Unabridged. Merriam-Webster, 2002. http://unabridged.merriam-webster.com (21 Nov. 2005).

 

[Lord DragonsWing]

I'm with Rumple. There's nothing wrong with the way you're using it. One trick I always use is to see if it flows. I can't really describe it, it just flows with the character. If I say it over and over and it doesn't flow, then something is wrong with the POV. It sounds wrong. But the way you're using sounds great.

 

[Rumple Foreskin]

The last time this many folks agreed with me, I'd just said, "It's my fault."

Rumple Foreskin

 

[yui]

The last time this many folks agreed with me, I'd just said, "It's my fault."

Rumple Foreskin

Personally, I always blame you.

And Carson. *nods*

 

[Stella_Omega]

How about sinning more?

[threadjack] yes, [please! [/threadjack]

YOURS:
Quote:
Dave scratched his head nervously. The waiting room was empty, and almost as cold as the winter air outside. Yesterday he had been looking forward to this moment, but now he was not so sure of himself. Was this really the right choice?



MY CHANGE:
Quote:
Dave scratched his head nervously. The waiting room was empty, and almost as cold as the winter air outside. Yesterday, he had been looking forward to this moment, but he was not so sure anymore. Was this really the right choice?

Excellent example, Elsol, and I shall profit from it immediately. thank you!

 

[Guest]

The last time this many folks agreed with me, I'd just said, "It's my fault."

I love when you confess.

Perdita


p.s. A special Hola! to SMUK

 

[Rumple Foreskin]

I love when you confess.

Perdita


p.s. A special Hola! to SMUK

Hey there, nice lady.

The only problem with my confessions is they're so incredibly boring.

Glad you liked SMUK. It was just too tempting. Yes, I confess, I did it. But he -> <- him, that's who made me do it.

That should be enough to let me walk away with OJ and Robert Blake from any bible-belt or LA court.

Rumple Foreskin

 

[SummerMorning]

I love when you confess.

Perdita


p.s. A special Hola! to SMUK

Welcome back P (bet somebody welcomed you on some autre thread already)

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Worked fine for me.

I use the conceptual now in my works, where the stories are generally 3rd omni past tense.

 

[Stella_Omega]

...

That should be enough to let me walk away with OJ and Robert Blake from any bible-belt or LA court.

Rumple Foreskin

Well, untill the civil court case, anyways

 

[BlackSnake]

Warning: This thread contains sentences relating to the topic of authoring!

...

Consider this:

Dave scratched his head nervously. The waiting room was empty, and almost as cold as the winter air outside. Yesterday he had been looking forward to this moment, but now he was not so sure of himself. Was this really the right choice?


...

I write mainly in the 3rd person myself. Re-think and rewrite the same thing.

Consider this alternative:

Dave scratched his head nervously. The waiting room was empty, and almost as cold as the winter air outside. Yesterday he had been looking forward to that moment, but he was no longer so sure of himself. Was it really the right choice?


Dump the now

 

[Stella_Omega]

I write mainly in the 3rd person myself. Re-think and rewrite the same thing.

Consider this alternative:

Dave scratched his head nervously. The waiting room was empty, and almost as cold as the winter air outside. Yesterday he had been looking forward to that moment, but he was no longer so sure of himself. Was it really the right choice?


Dump the now

"That" doesn't flow, IMO, Blacksnake.
It's a close call, but I'd leave it as "this."

 

[NoJo]

It's completely acceptable and banal. You're being bothered by a rule that doesn't exist. Go forth and sin no less.

Hey, that reminds me, how come there isn't a Banal Sex story category here?

 

[shereads]

The past tense of "now" is "new," isn't it?

 

[Stella_Omega]

Hey, that reminds me, how come there isn't a Banal Sex story category here?

That seems to be the most poplular way to write, by and large. It's trans-categorical...