Unusual insertions

[mcfbridge]

Okay, I just saw a lady on a webcam put a small toy frog into her vagina. I don't know if it's the most unusual thing I've ever seen inserted, but it's up there.

Probably the most unusual thing I've ever seen inserted into a woman in real life, is a wooden cooking spoon. Many years ago, I dated a very submissive woman, and I would place the blade end of the spoon into her vagina. I admit I got a kick out of watching her lips close over the thing, leaving the wooden handle sticking out. I would also pull the thing out, until the very widest part of the spoon was in her opening. I actually had pictures of that for quite some time, but when I became engaged to my current wife I destroyed them.

And for those of you who are asking why I didn't save them or post them. I promised the girl that no one but me would ever see those pictures, and I kept that promies. Also, for those of you who are wondering if I am making this up, I assure that every word of this is absolutely true.


That said. Guys, what is the most unusual thing you have ever seen a woman insert into her body. I don't mean on film or in pictures, I mean that you have actually seen. Also, did you put it in, or did the girl?

And girls, what was the most unusual thing you ever inserted. Also, why did you do it and where did you put it.

Finally, is allowing a strange foreign object to be placed into your body, one of the ultimate acts of submission, or does it have some other meaning?

 

[stonedfox]

I once put a large MagLite in my vagina. I did it because I wasn't wearing any pants and I was stoned and my fiancee and me were bored. He was amazed at how much of it would fit in. In my case, it didn't have anything to do with dominance or submission, or even sex. More to do with pot and boredom.

 

[mrboom]

A wine Bottle, like you’re ex my ex-girlfriend was submissive and she and I took turns in pushing it into her. It was very sexy!!!!!

 

[Guest]

stonedfox = "she-who-trolls-CV"

Mcfbridge - I'm not sure.

mrboom - I'm not sure.

Anyhow, it's always better be safe than sorry.

Newbies, you're warned: "she-who-trolls-CV" is a "hater".

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Urgh!

Include me out of this one.

---dr.M.

 

[NoJo]

I once put a large MagLite in my vagina. I did it because I wasn't wearing any pants and I was stoned and my fiancee and me were bored. He was amazed at how much of it would fit in. In my case, it didn't have anything to do with dominance or submission, or even sex. More to do with pot and boredom.

What happened when you switched it on? Was it like when you put a torch in your mouth? It sounds cool. I'm going to try it tonight (won't tell her beforehand though).

 

[mcfbridge]

Urgh!

Include me out of this one.

---dr.M.

Ok, have to ask. Why post a post which says you prefer not to post.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Ok, have to ask. Why post a post which says you prefer not to post.

It was a shudder reflex.

 

[BlackShanglan]

It was a shudder reflex.

And that one was ...?

 

[Guest]

Ok, have to ask. Why post a post which says you prefer not to post.

OK. I skeptically keep an eye on you.

Newbies, be aware, "she-who-trolls-CV" will do real-life damage.

 

[purple_angel]

I once worked in a hospital and a guy was admitted to A&E with a rose stuck up his penis - can't remember if it was Valantines Day or not but he was in such pain - the rose had thorns and he couldn't get it out!!

 

[mcfbridge]

I once worked in a hospital and a guy was admitted to A&E with a rose stuck up his penis - can't remember if it was Valantines Day or not but he was in such pain - the rose had thorns and he couldn't get it out!!

Okay, might have nightmares from this one for a very long time. Any more pleasant stories?

 

[Boota]

For another really unpleasant story:

When I was a kid we were in the ER one night for one of my clutzy brother's many accidents, and the paramedics brought in a woman with her legs spread and she was covered up with a sheet. The sheet moved just enough at the exact moment I looked and I could see a Coke bottle sticking out of her vagina and there was some pretty important looking stuff inside the bottle. Apparently using the opened bottle caused a suction and tore at her insides.

 

[yui]

For another really unpleasant story:

When I was a kid we were in the ER one night for one of my clutzy brother's many accidents, and the paramedics brought in a woman with her legs spread and she was covered up with a sheet. The sheet moved just enough at the exact moment I looked and I could see a Coke bottle sticking out of her vagina and there was some pretty important looking stuff inside the bottle. Apparently using the opened bottle caused a suction and tore at her insides.

*hyperventilating* Why...isn't...there...a...warning on...the bottle?

That one just makes me feel a little lightheaded, Boota.

 

[minsue]

*hyperventilating* Why...isn't...there...a...warning on...the bottle?

That one just makes me feel a little lightheaded, Boota.

A warning on the bottle?!?

You're so damned cute, Yui.

 

[goro goro]

For another really unpleasant story:

When I was a kid we were in the ER one night for one of my clutzy brother's many accidents, and the paramedics brought in a woman with her legs spread and she was covered up with a sheet. The sheet moved just enough at the exact moment I looked and I could see a Coke bottle sticking out of her vagina and there was some pretty important looking stuff inside the bottle. Apparently using the opened bottle caused a suction and tore at her insides.

Okay, let me get this right: Was the bottle inside her vagina or her vagina inside her pussy ?
Just to make sure I'll have the right nightmare tonight.
:cringe:

 

[goro goro]

For another really unpleasant story:

When I was a kid we were in the ER one night for one of my clutzy brother's many accidents, and the paramedics brought in a woman with her legs spread and she was covered up with a sheet. The sheet moved just enough at the exact moment I looked and I could see a Coke bottle sticking out of her vagina and there was some pretty important looking stuff inside the bottle. Apparently using the opened bottle caused a suction and tore at her insides.

Okay, let me get this right: Was the bottle inside her vagina or her vagina inside the bottle ?
Just to make sure I'll have the right nightmare tonight.
:cringe:

 

[goro goro]

See what that did to me ? I started writing total rubbish. AND I double posted.

 

[stonedfox]

What happened when you switched it on? Was it like when you put a torch in your mouth? It sounds cool. I'm going to try it tonight (won't tell her beforehand though).

Not that end, but that would have been cool.

 

[stonedfox]

stonedfox = "she-who-trolls-CV"

Mcfbridge - I'm not sure.

mrboom - I'm not sure.

Anyhow, it's always better be safe than sorry.

Newbies, you're warned: "she-who-trolls-CV" is a "hater".

::Crying::

What does that mean??? What the fuck does that mean???

 

[stonedfox]

Okay, let me get this right: Was the bottle inside her vagina or her vagina inside the bottle ?
Just to make sure I'll have the right nightmare tonight.
:cringe:

I think all of the above. And that is too much going on in a 'giney.

 

[cloudy]

::Crying::

What does that mean??? What the fuck does that mean???

Don't cry, it's just CV. You'll get used to his off-on-a-tangent posts eventually, and even laugh at them sometimes.

If they start making sense though, be afraid, be very afraid.

 

[stonedfox]

It's good to have support. I can get real emotional sometimes. Thanks cloud.

 

[yui]

::Crying::

What does that mean??? What the fuck does that mean???

It's okay, don't cry. CV is just a wee bit nuts. He has flashes of brilliance, but also moments (looong, looong moments) of less than coherent nattering.

Edited: What cloudy says.

 

[BlackShanglan]

I seem to remember reading about some minor poet from the pre-1900's whose mates thought a funny joke for his stag night would be to stick a blade of grass up his urethra once he'd passed out drunk.

Unfortunately they picked one of those varieties that is smooth one way and rough the other. Taking it out did some damage; the resulting infection finished the poor bastard.

On the more humorous side ...

(1) Remember (in the US) a women's deoderant called "Tickle"? Phallically shaped cannister with a smoothly rounded top? A friend who worked in the college infirmary swore that it was a dull Friday night that they didn't fish one of those out of a young lady.

(2) My father worked in a hospital for much of his life. In the hospital, anything removed from the body must go to pathology. He summoned a nurse to come take an item to pathology; she whinged on that that was something the candystripers (young nurse-wannabes) were meant to do. Father had to explain that the object in question was an 8-inch dildo retrieved from an unfortunate gentleman's rectum, and he had no intention of handing it to a 19-year-old.