Two approaches to incest: which one is better?

[MayorReynolds]

Lately I've been struggling with other stories I'd like to submit to this site, leaping from idea to idea to until I finally decided to try my hand at a mother/daughter incest story.

The basic premise is this: a college freshman is returning home for Spring Break. As she was getting ready to depart for her first year of college, she suddenly found herself in heavy makeout session with her own mom. The girl broke away and ran for the hills. Since then she has been so apprehensive about the encounter that she has stayed away from home during Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Now she has garnered the courage to come home during Spring Break and deal with the situation. She enters the house...and here is where the story hinges on two possibilities. In the first summary I jotted down in my black Moleskine book (used exclusively for erotica) Jess comes home and finds her mother and female cousin screwing on the couch, even though they knew Jess would be home any minute. The mother and cousin react to Jess catching them in a very nonchalant manner; in a sense it's a little cold, almost sociopathic.

A few hours after I scribbled those notes, I came to the realization that Jess stumbling on this encounter would be the 'porno' version of such a situation. I think a better way to approach this story is to have the build-up be much slower and more suspenseful. So my new idea is Jess being in this house with her mom, the air being thick with tension, things being awkward and "will she/won't she," desires and suggestiveness building and building until Jess and her mom finally hook up.

But what do you guys think?

 

[SecondCircle]

The second one. Build up and tension help to define your characters by seeing how they act under that pressure. And it just sounds more interesting that way, and a lot more realistic. Besides, it sounds like your characters have had a while to have their own space, so though it may be awkward for them at first, maybe they'll come to an interesting compromise. Just make sure you don't lose the readers interest in the build up. Keep layering on the tension of you want. I bet that hug would be an interesting one when they see each other again.

 

[sr71plt]

You haven't mentioned dealing with the emotional trauma and taboo of sexual arousal between parent and child, so I see no reason to go with the second, more literary, approach. You're not dealing with anything of literary value. Might as well just do the unbelievable but arousing stroke version and go with the first one. The readers of what you describe will be mostly interested in going straight to the sex act fantasy.

 

[MayorReynolds]

You haven't mentioned dealing with the emotional trauma and taboo of sexual arousal between parent and child, so I see no reason to go with the second, more literary, approach. You're not dealing with anything of literary value. Might as well just do the unbelievable but arousing stroke version and go with the first one. The readers of what you describe will be mostly interested in going straight to the sex act fantasy.

Guilt, anxiety and apprehension would be part of the buildup, I'm thinking. Since this is a Spring Break vacation, the entire week could be used for buildup. I had plans for Jess and her mom to be awkward, perhaps testy around each other at first. Maybe Jess can stumble onto her mom and cousin later on in the story, without them knowing. Maybe encounters with the cousin and an aunt can ease Jess into sex with her mom. Hell, maybe it turns out that incest amongst women in the family is revealed to be an ongoing tradition and in the end Jess comes to terms with it and is initiated into it.

This wouldn't be an easy task (is writing ever?) but I'm willing to give it a shot. In the end if the numbers are low, I'll just use it as a learning experience.

 

[sdineen]

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[Sonatatre]

How about if the daughter is the scared one coming home while her mother is more for it.

Maybe there are more people there? A seemingly innocent hug in front of others with the mother touching something that should not be touched in a normal mother and daughter hug.
The mother might say something that sounds innocent for others but the daughter gets it is something for her, something that shows that the mother still wants her.

Maybe a dinner with some family and friends to celebrate the daughter being home for the summer and at some point they end up alone in the kitchen and the mother steals a kiss just before someone walks into the kitchen.

After first being hesitant and many close calls over the night the daughter cant deny her feelings for her mother and how exciting the evening have been and it ends with them surrendering to their attraction for each other.

But honestly it sounds like you have a good imagination and i am sure it will be fine whatever you decide to do.

 

[HeyAll]

2nd is substantially better.

How about the daughter comes home and it's super awkward.

The mother apologizes profusely for the kiss. Says she had no idea how she let that happen, and so forth. They talk it out in the living room the moment she arrived home.

Dinner that night was quiet and awkward. They engage in small talk, and perhaps the mother reveals that she is a lesbian now (or that she swings both ways).

OR

That dinner is awkward, and later that night Jess is on her way to bed. Mom is in the bathroom washing up. Jess sees a picture inside her mother's room and can't help but walk inside and look. The picture is of mom smiling, close, with her niece (Jess' cousin). At that moment, Jess 'figures it out.'

Mom steps out of the bathroom and sees her daughter with a look of shock on her face. Mom struggles to admit that she's been having a secret lesbian relationship with her niece.

 

[lovecraft68]

You haven't mentioned dealing with the emotional trauma and taboo of sexual arousal between parent and child, so I see no reason to go with the second, more literary, approach. You're not dealing with anything of literary value. Might as well just do the unbelievable but arousing stroke version and go with the first one. The readers of what you describe will be mostly interested in going straight to the sex act fantasy.

Translation

Because my own incest stories have low scores and are boring I have decided that no one can write a decent incest story and I have poked fun at the incest readers for being ill bred idiots many times so just go with a stroker its all they understand. And I only feel that way because I can't write in the category to save my life.

To the OP and anyone else in the thread ignore this idiot. He has nothing but disdain for the category mostly because his attempts at it suck.

To the actual question my preference is number two but....

The only way to get there is we need to know what led to this make out session. To capture #2 you need to have some build up to the kissing and to really get some build up, mom should seem just as taken aback by the make out session.

 

[MayorReynolds]

The only way to get there is we need to know what led to this make out session. To capture #2 you need to have some build up to the kissing and to really get some build up, mom should seem just as taken aback by the make out session.

Definitely. I've planned to put that in the opening - let the reader know right from the start what's going on and then my character enters a house with tension-laden air.

And lesbian incest is a huge turn-on for me so I thought it'd be fun to give the subject matter a try. I understand that 'real' incest situations are not necessarily a jump from the first paragraph to the sack (i.e. "My boobs look like this. I walked out of the shower, caught my sister masturbating, got instantly wet and decided to teach her a thing or two.") Incest is a whole other ballgame from sex with unrelated partners. It requires a lot of finesse.

So I'll probably be filling up my notebook a little bit more before I jump into the family pool.

 

[VanArsedale]

Hi, I'm new and late to this party, but I'll offer my two cents even though parent/child incest is not my thing.

I'm sick of reading Number 1 in any category. It just sounds like the author's masturbatory fantasy. There are thousand of similar stories out there. They are all unrealistic and boring. I doubt anyone reads them to the end. People just fap to them and never return to the story after they get off.

Number 2 sounds like something that might actually be interesting and that might be read because it has some value beyond getting the author's rocks off.

Go with number 2.

 

[arnoldpalmer47]

Just wondering

I don't do the whole incest thing, but here's what. Am wondering. After you jerk your cock to mom, dad, sister, whoever, is it awkward to talk to them? My penis goes limp when I think about my mom... But hey Freud (andim sorry a few others) would say deep down I wanna fuck her

 

[MayorReynolds]

I don't do the whole incest thing, but here's what. Am wondering. After you jerk your cock to mom, dad, sister, whoever, is it awkward to talk to them? My penis goes limp when I think about my mom... But hey Freud (andim sorry a few others) would say deep down I wanna fuck her

After I read incest erotica I feel nothing sexual toward anybody in my real family. I can talk to them just fine.

Erotic incest stories are just stories. They aren't reality. And they're stories about somebody else's (fictional or otherwise) family, not my own. I don't draw a connection between the characters in those stories to people in real life because there isn't one If the story was about my real family I'd be too creeped out to keep reading. If the stories used names of friends and family that would probably make me uncomfortable enough to click 'back' too.

Also, if I learned about a family I knew in reality, people I was close to and knew personally, getting it on with each other, same creep vibes apply. As long as the incest stays in fiction, I can deal with reading about it.

Overall though, the appeal of incest stories to me is how dirty and 'wrong' they are. They generate heat out of a taboo. It's strange saying that too because I would turn away and refuse to read piss/puke/scat stories or rape fantasies.; those aren't my thing. But mother/daughter or two sisters? Bring it on ;-)

 

[MayorReynolds]

One more question

Which category would this go under, Incest/Taboo or Lesbian Sex? I've seen lesbian incest stories get attacked in their comment sections because the commenters see girl-on-girl as strictly belonging in Lesbian rather than Incest..as if lesbian love between siblings or mother/daughter isn't 'real' incest.

I wish it were possible to chose more than category since other stories I have planned involve different types of eroticism; in one case, picking the appropriate one category for an idea I have is going to be spoilery.

 

[lovecraft68]

I don't do the whole incest thing, but here's what. Am wondering. After you jerk your cock to mom, dad, sister, whoever, is it awkward to talk to them? My penis goes limp when I think about my mom... But hey Freud (andim sorry a few others) would say deep down I wanna fuck her

I write mother/son incest stories and can honestly say the only time I have ever wanted to touch my mother inappropriately is to strangle her when she's in nagging mode.

It annoys me that the concept of incest authors/readers is they would fuck their mom/dad/ whatever if given the chance.

Like anything else its a fantasy. If you read a story where a wife brings home three guys to fuck and it got you hot are you going to bring three guys home to your wife?

After reading a blackmail story in the non con section are you going to do it to someone?

The attraction to many is the simple taboo and "dirty turn on" the fantasy brings. The crossing of the ultimate line.

What I find hilarious is when incest crops up in a major book like Flowers in the attic or, a better example, Game of Thrones.

Got a brother and sister fucking in GOT, but people are ok with it because it was a best selling book and its HBO.

many of those same people would see a brother sister story on lit or amazon (when they allowed it) or smashwords and go

Oh, that is sick what's wrong with them?

Now, I gotta get back to Flowers in the attic!

And I can easily smell the desire to fuck your mother in your "my dick goes limp when I think of my mom" statement.

There was no reason to state that other than to protest too loudly as the expression goes.

People like you are nothing short of cattle looking to be led around by the nose.

 

[MSTarot]

There tends to be an idea that because you write something you must want to do it.

I can't say I've ever heard of a spy novelist being arrest for treason and espionage. ( Not that somewhere in the world it hasn't, but I haven't heard of it)

Dan Brown doesn't get regularly picked up when people die with strange symbols carved into their chests.

Tolkien didn't make a habit out of tossing gold rings into volcanoes.

Yet if you write Erotica you're expressing an inner desire? That you could only write something like that if you were already thinking about it?

Sigh.

Anyway back to the topic of the O.P.


I would have to say it really depends on what you want out of your story. Are you trying for (as pilot said) a stroke story? Then if that's what you want to write then by all means go with the first one. Add a bit of "Oh I can't do that your my Mom!" and you will have just that.

But if instead your wanting to have something that will really get too your reader and maybe be enjoyable when they arn't running the mouse with their off hand...then the second one. With a bit of editing to the first part.

Daughter's packing to go. Mom's all emotionally charged. Her little girls a woman leaving home for the first time and all that. Both crying, both in tears, a bit of your dad would be so proud if he was here. ( dead father works better than off playing golf)

A kiss on the cheek that slips a bit to much. A startled half look... then a full on kiss that lasts for more than a moment. Suddenly realizing what she's doing the daughter breaks the kiss, grabs her bag and as you said heads for the hills.

Now I'm interested. Why did the second kiss happen? Is mom secretly Bi-sexual. Is the daughter?

Exploring these and other thoughts could be a powerful build up to a 'climactic' final sex scene.

Well my two pieces of eight's worth. Don't 'spend' them all in one place.

M.S.Tarot

 

[MiriamL]

Daughter's packing to go. Mom's all emotionally charged. Her little girls a woman leaving home for the first time and all that.

A kiss on the cheek that slips a bit to much. A startled half look... then a full on kiss that lasts for more than a moment. Suddenly realizing what she's doing the daughter breaks the kiss, grabs her bag and as you said heads for the hills.

Now I'm interested. Why did the second kiss happen? Is mom secretly Bi-sexual. Is the daughter?

A very powerful interlude beautifully described. This sometimes happens when two women are overcome with emotion, and the physically of the moment slips over the edge into uncharted territory.

How long the kiss lasts is very important...not long enough to become obviously sexual, but long enough to prompt a lingering temptation, as the growing incestuous attraction unfolds.

 

[MayorReynolds]

Daughter's packing to go. Mom's all emotionally charged. Her little girls a woman leaving home for the first time and all that. Both crying, both in tears, a bit of your dad would be so proud if he was here. ( dead father works better than off playing golf)

A kiss on the cheek that slips a bit to much. A startled half look... then a full on kiss that lasts for more than a moment. Suddenly realizing what she's doing the daughter breaks the kiss, grabs her bag and as you said heads for the hills.

Now I'm interested. Why did the second kiss happen? Is mom secretly Bi-sexual. Is the daughter?

Exploring these and other thoughts could be a powerful build up to a 'climactic' final sex scene.

Well my two pieces of eight's worth. Don't 'spend' them all in one place.

M.S.Tarot

I finished writing the flashback scene yesterday and that's pretty much how I decided to approach it. One innocent touch spirals downward (upward?), the daughter begins feeling increasingly uneasy (and strangely aroused) and suddenly they're all over each other until the daughter realizes what's happening and bolts. My feeling is that it should establish a lot of unanswered questions while leaving he reader wondering now that the daughter has returned—I mean yeah, the reader will probably predict the end from the outset but the important part is why, and how we get there.

The story's coming along alright so far, though I'm sure I'll be doing plenty of marking up and revising before the final submission.

 

[Stryke_Infinite]

I definitely encourage you to go with the 2nd idea over the initial one.

Why?

Because reading about the build-up to the act is what separates this type of erotica from virtually every other form of video out there.

You're almost never going to see the kind of incremental step up necessary to tell a truly tantalizing story of erotica in a porno movie or clip. Too many people are just waiting for the couple to get naked and get it on already! lol!

Literature is different. You can take your time and pace the reader as you go along. My opinion is that if someone is reading erotica as opposed to watching a movie they are already well suited to the relatively slow burn necessary to tell a good story.

As for the incest issue. I don't have any issue at all with it. I love my Mom and sister dearly, but would never, ever think of doing anything inappropriate with either. I've read a few of the Mom/Son stories on here and marveled at how capable the writers were at weaving a good tale. Heck, I may submit one myself.

 

[MayorReynolds]

First draft nearing completion!

I wholeheartedly went with option # 2.

My goal here is to weave a good, suspenseful tale, establish buildup, tension and teasing and then bean the reader over the head with some mind-blowing sex. But getting this right will involve tweaking the awkward and character-building scenes as well as the sex ones.

I took Sonatatre's suggestion and wrote a dinner scene near the beginning. In the story it's an early birthday celebration dinner, as my heroine, Jess, is set turn 19 in a couple of days. When the draft's done I plan to go back and figure out how I can make the dinner feel more uncomfortable for her.

The story's going to be divided into the 'days' of Jess' Spring Break, spanning a week, starting with her arriving on 'FRIDAY' and ending with her leaving again the next 'SUNDAY.' Now, there is going to be lots of buildup and mystery to the inevitable sex but I did throw in Jess masturbating in the shower on 'SATURDAY' morning.

Honestly I feel like there needs to be a balance between buildup and eroticism, like not diving straight into the meat but not having a huge gap where there's no satisfaction either. I'm not sure if this is a good direction to go.

Now, I want to lay out the structure and plot I've built into the story because I was wondering if you guys could tell me if I was going the right way. This is going to be full-on spoilery and very long but I think it would be beneficial to show you all my story's insides.

The first 'sex' scene (Saturday) is Jess getting off in the shower, where the end result is that the final image popping into her head as her climax is rushing through her is her mother, Adrian...which leads to more guilt. The idea is that there is a genetic sexual attraction formulating beneath the surface but Jess doesn't want to face the reality of it being there.

We then have her horny older cousin, Allison, give Jess a 'special' birthday present, a RealisticCock. I knew Allison was going to give Jess a bonus gift and it was going to be a sex toy, but I decided early on that a vibrator would be too old-hat and wrote in a RealisticCock instead. I don't know if you've ever seen RealisticCocks—I gave one to my girlfriend a year or so and we've had a lot of fun with it. But anyway, Allison leaves Jess alone with the toy, where it's established that Jess has plenty of her own fun with it...but the reader doesn't see that happening. Not yet.

On Saturday night Jess works up the courage to speak to her mother. They have a short conversation where it's established that Adrian has had time to come to terms with the 'incident' seven months ago. The two mutually agree to take things easy and try to rebuild their messed up relationship over the next few days.

Sunday is Jess' birthday. She wakes up and her Uncle Harry (who is married to Adrian's sister, Aunt Brenda) tells Jess she had a flat tire, he's pumped it up, but she needs to drive to the tire place to get it looked at it. Oh, and nothing sexual ever happens between Jess and Uncle Harry. This is an all-girl show, and I need Uncle Harry for something else important at the end. Jess comes back two hours later to an empty house, and it's here that she finds Adrian and Allison fucking...

...Only Jess does something rather devilish herself first. She hears the noises behind Adrian's locked bedroom door and curiosity gets the better of her. She grabs a thin screwdriver and uses it to gently pry open the button lock, whereupon she's hit in the face with sealed up pussy scent and is unhinged at the sight in front of her.

What I'm going for here is a metaphor. Physically and symbolically Jess has chosen to open the forbidden "door that should not be opened," and nothing will ever be the same. She can't bring herself to move away from what she's watching until Allison starts roleplaying as Jess and it really begins getting Adrian off. Allison mentions that as Not-Jess she's learned the 'secret' and it's made her unbelievably horny. Then she spots Real-Jess. Jess rushes back to her bedroom, where I have this scene where she's torn between being disgusted and out of her mind horny. She's starts trying to hurriedly pack and head for the hills again, but she's also fighting an uphill battle a she keeps stopping to touch herself.

Just then, Allison invades Jess' room with another tiny screwdriver. Allison backs Jess into a corner...Allison sees the truth of what's happening. She knows about Jess' pent up desires. Her younger cousin isn't good at hiding anything and never has been. And it's here, after Jess cant' take the pent sexual heat anymore, that she tosses sanity to the wind and has a wild sexual romp with her cousin, where we get to see how Jess likes to play with the RealisticCock. That's why I don't show it in the earlier scenes - I want to save it for this.

Anyway, they fuck, and afterwards Jess cuddles with Allison and asks what 'the secret' is. Allison says that's not for her to reveal. Only one person in the house is at liberty to say...Adrian. Allison then tells Jess that if she wants to try figuring out the 'secret' for herself to come upstairs to the guest room tomorrow. Before that, she takes Jess into the bathroom to shave her pussy. This isn't shown. I thought it best to show the results afterward.

The next day (Monday), Jess goes up to the guest room where it's time for fun with Allison and her mother, Aunt Brenda. It's here that any notions of taboo and guilt melt away. Allison has ushered Jess (whom she always calls "Lil J") into this sub-world of lesbian incest and for Jess, there's no going back. Jess sheepishly admits after the sex scene that she's got the hots for Adrian...but Aunt Brenda figures out that Jess won't be able to confront mom about it directly and decides to help set it up.

Finally, there's the sex scene between Jess and Adrian (Tuesday night). I haven't written or fully plotted it out yet, so I can't go into explicit detail. Hopefully the payoff will be considerable. But after that, there's a shorter penultimate scene (flashing forward to Saturday, I think) where all the women are in a big all-girl family orgy.

Jess leaves on Sunday on better terms with her mom, and presumably she's going back to try starting up some dirty business with her roommate, whom she has unexpressed feelings for. The last thing Jess sees before she gets in the car and leaves is Uncle Harry, sitting on the porch and drinking a beer. There's a smile on Uncle Harry's face, but there's a 'hollowness' in his eyes that suggests something...off. Jess leaves.

Here's the deal with Uncle Harry. The 'secret' that I've been building toward is that all the women in the family, going back generations, have all carried a genetic sexual attraction to one another. It's never in the men, just the women, and it just keeps happening between mothers and daughters, aunts and nieces, cousins, sisters, etc. Uncle Harry's the innocent bystander in all of it. He's been married to Brenda for over 20 years and still can't understand how it's possible. He's confused and torn between being disturbed and accepting of it. Thus, Uncle Harry is a sobering plot device. The entire story's been a buildup to Jess' initiation into a lesbian incest legacy, and Uncle Harry ends up being the 'reality' of actual incest and how it can really impact people.

That's one issue I was hoping I could get feedback on. I've chosen to stick Uncle Harry's apprehension at the very end, the last few paragraphs, so the reader gets the tension, suspense and hot sex first before this monkey wrench is thrown in. But that's the potential problem with it...it's a monkey wrench, and kind of dark.

What do you guys think? Does that sound like the right thing?