Try This & Report Back

[Shadowann2]

I got something embarassing to admit to...I have NEVER been able to have an orgasm vaginally or orally by my partner. He gets so frustrated..I try very hard to relax but it just doesn't work for me. So I am totally hoping this suggestion gives him some confidence that he can make me orgasm by his will.

I was very happy when I read this. I too have never been able to have an orgasm by my partner. It is killing his self esteem. I plan to use this thread to intoduce him to this technique.
I was just chatting with my best friend about this and she said that she and her husband have tried it and they love it. They also added one thing. Her husband will hold a vibrating "egg" in her g-spot while licking her clit. She said he had to peel her off the ceiling after she had more O's than she could count. I want to try that tonight!
I have to say Mr.GGG that I am upset about the fact that you keep instructing the men to continue on even when the women object. Even if a man thinks he knows what is best for her, if a woman says "no", or "stop it", he needs to listen! Other than that one issue I think this is a wonderful thread and I hope it will allow my husband to give me my first 'O' without doing it myself.

 

[MR.GGG]

Uhhuh

""I have to say Mr.GGG that I am upset about the fact that you keep instructing the men to continue on even when the women object. Even if a man thinks he knows what is best for her, if a woman says "no", or "stop it", he needs to listen!""

Under most circumstances I would agree with you completely on this. When it comes to Gspot stimulation however most of my Emails detail a period where the man starts to do the technique and the woman is saying ""stop, I have to pee, I feel funny, what are yoyu doing""...stuff like that. If he persists then the fireworks start.

My point here is that unless a woman has found her own G Spot she doesn't know what it takes to poke it and fire that puppy up. By following the instructions a great many women have "discovered" that not only do they have a G Spot but they have become multi-orgasmic through this technique. I hear over and over again.."If he'd stopped when I asked him to we never would have discovered this." They credit my instruction to be persistant on their success. I also said that a lot of women are VERY uncomfortable with the sensation of losing control of their own orgasms and bodies. This is another reason to persist. What a dumb reason not to ever cum like that - because HE'S in control of your orgasms and not you. Duhhh!

So again, I say, EVERY woman is different. She'll react different ways but if she stops this process before the G Spot is triggered she is going to lose out on a sexual sensation she could only read about before. When I tell guys to persist it is really for her own good because she just doesn't know how that part of her body works yet.

Some women are simply wired differently and this technique does NOTHING for them. I wish I could fix that but until you try and you go past that.."Stop it. It feels funny" stage you'll never know if it works for you or not. What a sad
thing if he "listens" to your requests to stop because YOU have never experienced the sensation of the build up of a GSpot Orgasm, are uncomfortable with the new sensation and terminate the try and you never get to experience multiple gut wrenching orgasms until you are nearly passing out.

No means NO except when....

OK?

 

[Shadowann2]

I hear over and over again.."If he'd stopped when I asked him to we never would have discovered this." They credit my instruction to be persistant on their success. I also said that a lot of women are VERY uncomfortable with the sensation of losing control of their own orgasms and bodies. This is another reason to persist. What a dumb reason not to ever cum like that - because HE'S in control of your orgasms and not you. Duhhh!

I can see your point but I still belive that if a woman says "No' then no it is. If she misses out on this experience then that is her choice to make, not his. It seems to me that it would be difficult to relax and enjoy the sensations if you are being forced to experience it against your will! I for one do not like to feel that I'm not in control of my body. That is why I rarely get drunk, have never tried street drugs, and refused drugs when I was having my 3 children. If my hubby didn't stop when I told him to, I would feel like I was being raped and could not enjoy the experience. You may think that it is "a dumb reason not to ever cum like that", but ultimately it is the woman's choice, NOT the man's. After all it is HER body!

 

[Starsong]

Perspective..

I think it is an issue of trust.. If you have a certain degree of trust in your partner, then your "no" or "stop" will be recognized for its intention.. I'm pretty sure most partners are very clear when no means NO..! If they aren't, then you are likely going to have more trouble being open to the experience in the first place, let alone even being in the er, position to have it..

My general feeling is, if a partner isn't even open to trying a new experience, then it isn't worth my time to try and convince them, no matter how powerful and revelatory it might be..

Like drugs, drink or any other consciousness altering tool, boundaries may vary.. Still, to reach those deeper places of ego transcendence it requires facing those very fears of losing control.. Thus one must weigh the value of potential growth against that of staying safe and "in control"..

If you trust your partner or teacher enough, they may help you to bypass all the psychobabble and fear and get straight to the experience..

So the question is- Does the end justify the means.? I guess that depends on your perspective..

In my case, no means no, but it had better be loud and clear..!

Communication is so important..

I tend to think hesitation and doubt cause a lot of the problems.. Fear of losing control is certainly a major reason many women and some men do not achieve those deeper levels of ecstasy and revelation..

Just my observation.. I'm also a big fan of people going at their own speed.. So no condemnation to those who feel a need to control their world and experience..
Everybody does the best they can..

Mr GGG among others has chosen to share their experiences.. It is for each of us to choose how we will apply it..

As for my perception of this technique-
A big Thumbs Up..!

 

[MR.GGG]

YUP

Trust is a huge factor. It always is during sex. That's why random, indiscriminate sex is initially very exciting. There is no trust, ya barely know the person so sex is an adventure fraught with danger. It is an adrenal rush not just a sexual one.

As we mature (if) then we, hopefully, achieve close to that rush through consensual and well practised lovemaking.

Shadwinn, your position is idealistic. Ask yourself how many women would die in their 80's, still VIRGINS, if everytime they had indicated "no" the guy they were with had stopped dead and not continued? I figure about 75%. After the first couple of fright initiated, "no's" there would be a pattern set. Sexual excitement. Sexual fear, a whispered "no", then hostility and frustration and termination. The population of the entire planet would only be about 50 million. Only really horny girls and drunk chicks would breed and Duracell and EverReady would be bigger than GM!

You know a lot of young girls just starting to have sex will say "no" repeatedly just because that's what they've been taught to say...what comes naturally to them when hands are going places they've never been before. Does it really mean NO? Of course not. Does, "NO! Getting your fucking hand out of there before I break it off!!" mean NO? Of course it DOES!

If you're with a lover/SO/ hubby - whatever and there is trust and in the spirit of sexual adventure, he pops a thumb in there ala "the Technique" and you are excited but you're not sure what's happening and are saying," noooo" should he stop? What I'm saying is that she doesn't know what the feeling is. Her natural reaction is likely to say, "noooo" just like she has since she was a teenager and Billy slid a hand under her bra... a natural response. He has a choice to continue to turn her on. I suggest that because so many women have no idea what or where their GSpot is or how to stimulate it. The Technique tells you how. The guy knows. If she doesn't then are you truly violating her by showing her how to cum like that?

On the other hand if she says," I know you're trying to poke my Gspot. I hate that-I don't have one- Get your fucking thumb outta there before I break it off. " Then my best guess is she's saying NO! not "noooo"

I have dozens of Emails where the WOMAN admits that she was trying to STOP from cuming when the guy/her SO started to do the technique to her and she reacted positively. They admit that after realizing HE was MAKING her cum and she was not in control at all, she was SCARED. Does that mean she wasn't absolutely astonished at finding out she was G or A Spot multi - Orgasmic? Does that mean he violated her by MAKINg her cum? If you are saying yes I suggest it is a damn dumb point of view and all the Emails I've read would agree. I haven't received ONE that even hinted at being mad at their SO for showing them how to cum like that and making them cum over and over again. On the contrary. you've read some of the responses. Have you read even one that said," Mr G., you bastard! My SO stuck his thumb in my twat the other night and made me cum 15 times in a row with your GSpot technique. How DARE YOU tell him to do that!!!"

It all comes down to communication and trust... and some common sense. Something that seems to be in very short supply these days in light of politically correct dogma.

 

[Shadowann2]

Re: YUP

First of all my name is ShadwANN. And second of of all, unless a woman is masterbating, isn't the man making her cum anyway? How is this any different from a man giving her an orgasm from oral sex? I'm sorry but I feel that there has to be a strong line drawn on this issue. No has to mean no. If a woman says no and the man thinks she doesn't really mean it, he should stop for the moment and double check with her that she really does want him to stop. I'm not saying that he has to stop, get up, and leave the room, but continuing as though she hasn't said anything is wrong.
Date rape is too big of an issue these days for there to be any gray area here. If you have to hold her down because she is trying to push you off of her, you have gone too far. If you have to hold her down because she is wiggling so much, then by all means- keep going!
But there is a difference. I know that you think ignoring a woman's "no" for the sake of a great orgasm is for the greater good, but if she misses out on this experience because she isn't willing to go with the flow (so to speak) then it's her loss. Who are you or any other man to tell her she has to do it anyway? I'm sorry that you think I am naive on this subject. I have been in too many situations where I had to all but slap a guy to get my point across that "no" means "no"!
My theory is that if the man is in doubt, he should double check b4 continuing. Then there is no possibility of miscommunication. Just blanketly telling a man to continue even is his SO says "no" is just wrong in my book.
I didn't mean for this to turn into such a debate. I think your posts here and on the other threads are great. You have provided a lot of invaluable information to a lot of people. I know I've learned more from you than I though I could. I thought I was well read on this issue and several others, but you have showed me that one can always learn more. Please keep up the good work!

 

[BlueDaisy]

Re: Re: Ok...I've got to ask

I'm able to do it with a vibrator, some kinds work for me and some don't. I think you have to try a few to find one that hits the spot just right. I tried one that siad it was for g-spot stim, but it didn't work as well as my plain old vibe. What works for me is one with decent girth (the g-spot ones are thin) so I can get stimulation on my g-spot but it's also thick enough so I have something to bear down on. I don't know what it's like for other women, but I need to be able to give a good squeeze on something to get off.

Good luck and keep trying!!

Psyche and PinkOrchid...thanks for your input.

I'm really bummed out right now. I finally got up the gumption to tell hubby that he was gonna try my g-spot (in the past he always claimed he couldn't find it)...lol. See, he takes meds that have killed his libido. That, plus my size. Anyway, our sex life is nil.

We tried tonight for around 1.5 hours. He found it this time, and several times I go soooo close to cumming, but something kept me from going over the edge. It wasn't the fear of peeing...I was on a towel and wasn't worried about it.

He tried several different hand positions; thumb, an assortment of fingers. We tried with me on my knees, and with me on my back.

I think part of the problem is that we started out "cold". Foreplay is almost non-existant these days, too. During the attempt, there was no cuddling or anything. He just lay there and pressed and rubbed at the spot; I massaged his cock and balls.

After all that time I realized he was getting tired, so I just said forget it. But I was so close, I felt like I was almost on the brink. Lying there in bed, I was almost moaning in pain. Not hurting pain, but you know the feeling...where you are on the brink and can't go over and it feels like it hurts almost. I felt like screaming, I was so frustrated. Part of that came from his lack of emotional involvement in the process. The med. has him TOO evened out (it is an antidepressant). I got my crystal wand and my g-spot vibe and tried myself, but I just wound up sore.

I give up for the time being, as long as he is on this medication. It is really no use trying right now.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Blue

 

[psyche]

Re: Re: Re: Ok...I've got to ask

Psyche and PinkOrchid...thanks for your input.

I'm really bummed out right now. I finally got up the gumption to tell hubby that he was gonna try my g-spot (in the past he always claimed he couldn't find it)...lol. See, he takes meds that have killed his libido. That, plus my size. Anyway, our sex life is nil.

We tried tonight for around 1.5 hours. He found it this time, and several times I go soooo close to cumming, but something kept me from going over the edge. It wasn't the fear of peeing...I was on a towel and wasn't worried about it.

He tried several different hand positions; thumb, an assortment of fingers. We tried with me on my knees, and with me on my back.

I think part of the problem is that we started out "cold". Foreplay is almost non-existant these days, too. During the attempt, there was no cuddling or anything. He just lay there and pressed and rubbed at the spot; I massaged his cock and balls.

After all that time I realized he was getting tired, so I just said forget it. But I was so close, I felt like I was almost on the brink. Lying there in bed, I was almost moaning in pain. Not hurting pain, but you know the feeling...where you are on the brink and can't go over and it feels like it hurts almost. I felt like screaming, I was so frustrated. Part of that came from his lack of emotional involvement in the process. The med. has him TOO evened out (it is an antidepressant). I got my crystal wand and my g-spot vibe and tried myself, but I just wound up sore.

I give up for the time being, as long as he is on this medication. It is really no use trying right now.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Blue

Oh, Blue, I nearly cried when I read this post. I am in a similar position. My husband's sex drive has taken a nose dive. We've been married for 20 years, he has migraine headaches, and he was depressed. He is finally taking an antidepressant medication so our relationship has vastly improved, but our sex life has not come back. And you're right the mood set ahead of time and what you bring into it colors what happens in bed.

 

[BlueDaisy]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Ok...I've got to ask

Oh, Blue, I nearly cried when I read this post. I am in a similar position. My husband's sex drive has taken a nose dive. We've been married for 20 years, he has migraine headaches, and he was depressed. He is finally taking an antidepressant medication so our relationship has vastly improved, but our sex life has not come back. And you're right the mood set ahead of time and what you bring into it colors what happens in bed.

Psyche, I'm so sorry. I guess you and I can commisserate. We can have our own "women who aren't getting any" club.

I'm sorry to hear about your husband. My husband does not have migraines, but I have friends who do, and I know from hearing them talk just how debilitating they are. Oh...may I ask what antidepressant your hubby is on? Mine is on Zoloft (as I am).

We've been married for almost 19 years and have 3 kids. How about you? If you want to chat, e-mail or PM me.

Take care, hon.
Blue

 

[psyche]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Ok...I've got to ask

Psyche, I'm so sorry. I guess you and I can commisserate. We can have our own "women who aren't getting any" club.

I'm sorry to hear about your husband. My husband does not have migraines, but I have friends who do, and I know from hearing them talk just how debilitating they are. Oh...may I ask what antidepressant your hubby is on? Mine is on Zoloft (as I am).

We've been married for almost 19 years and have 3 kids. How about you? If you want to chat, e-mail or PM me.

Take care, hon.
Blue

Well, I am getting some since I have taken a lover! He is on Prozac and we have no children.

 

[BlueDaisy]

Well, I am getting some since I have taken a lover! He is on Prozac and we have no children.

Hey Psyche,

Does your hubby know about the lover? I have considered it, but everytime I start to seriously think about it, I get a major smack of guilt right upside the head (well, not literally)...I start thinking about the vows I took 19 years ago. Oh...I'm not judging you...shoot, I may very well do the same thing myself here before long.

I've sent you a PM about some other stuff; hope you don't mind. It was getting too far off-topic, so I took it there to.

Blue

 

[Don K Dyck]

Re: Re: Re: Ok...I've got to ask

Psyche and PinkOrchid...thanks for your input.

I'm really bummed out right now. I finally got up the gumption to tell hubby that he was gonna try my g-spot (in the past he always claimed he couldn't find it)...lol. See, he takes meds that have killed his libido. That, plus my size. Anyway, our sex life is nil.

We tried tonight for around 1.5 hours. He found it this time, and several times I go soooo close to cumming, but something kept me from going over the edge. It wasn't the fear of peeing...I was on a towel and wasn't worried about it.

He tried several different hand positions; thumb, an assortment of fingers. We tried with me on my knees, and with me on my back.

I think part of the problem is that we started out "cold". Foreplay is almost non-existant these days, too. During the attempt, there was no cuddling or anything. He just lay there and pressed and rubbed at the spot; I massaged his cock and balls.

After all that time I realized he was getting tired, so I just said forget it. But I was so close, I felt like I was almost on the brink. Lying there in bed, I was almost moaning in pain. Not hurting pain, but you know the feeling...where you are on the brink and can't go over and it feels like it hurts almost. I felt like screaming, I was so frustrated. Part of that came from his lack of emotional involvement in the process. The med. has him TOO evened out (it is an antidepressant). I got my crystal wand and my g-spot vibe and tried myself, but I just wound up sore.

I give up for the time being, as long as he is on this medication. It is really no use trying right now.

Thanks for letting me vent. Blue

Hi Blue, the foreplay is quite important, especially when you are learning the technique . . . In my experience, G-Spot stimulation is best placed late in the stimulation rather than early . . . it seems the emotional system needs to be "warmed up" before responding . . . I have found that there are times in the cycle when female responsiveness is lower, as mentioned on this and other threads, and that "hitting the Big G" DOES NOT happen every time, even with an experienced practicing couple.

The anti-depressant market is very good for the chemical companies . . . depression can be cured by the old formula of regular strenuous exercise and a fresh food diet excluding caffeine, white flour and white sugar . . . does wonders for the libido . . .

Please persevere . . . these can be difficult times for couples . . .

Play safe, Don

 

[BlueDaisy]

Hi Blue, the foreplay is quite important, especially when you are learning the technique . . . In my experience, G-Spot stimulation is best placed late in the stimulation rather than early . . . it seems the emotional system needs to be "warmed up" before responding . . . I have found that there are times in the cycle when female responsiveness is lower, as mentioned on this and other threads, and that "hitting the Big G" DOES NOT happen every time, even with an experienced practicing couple.

The anti-depressant market is very good for the chemical companies . . . depression can be cured by the old formula of regular strenuous exercise and a fresh food diet excluding caffeine, white flour and white sugar . . . does wonders for the libido . . .

Please persevere . . . these can be difficult times for couples . . .

Play safe, Don

Thanks, Don, for your input. You make good sense. I wish it were that easy.
Oh, well.

Blue

 

[Duaner1955]

Newbies; please read this

Just a bump here,

so that all the newbies (guys and gals) will check out
the vital information presented in this thread.

Go to begining and read and absorb....

you will not be disappointed.

 

[psyche]

Hey Psyche,

Does your hubby know about the lover? I have considered it, but everytime I start to seriously think about it, I get a major smack of guilt right upside the head (well, not literally)...I start thinking about the vows I took 19 years ago. Oh...I'm not judging you...shoot, I may very well do the same thing myself here before long.

I've sent you a PM about some other stuff; hope you don't mind. It was getting too far off-topic, so I took it there to.

Blue

Blue I enjoy hearing from you anytime. And you're right about the lover, my husband doesn't know. I have my twinges of guilt about it, but he is the best man I have ever had in my bed and I'll be damned if I can give him up for anything.........can't and won't. Masterbation just wasn't enough for me after a while, love that touch of a wonderful lover.

 

[tn_8tiv]

Blue Daisy

Good Sex must start with the mind...the anticipation, the sharing of two bodies, the building of lust and desire.

It doesn't matter which spot gets the stimulation, if you don't stimulate the mind, it's very difficult to stimulate the body. For some reason, our brains and nerve endings are connected (strange concept huh)...and no matter how hard we try to satisfy each other physically, if we aren't emotionally attached, it doesn't work.

On the other hand, I have found that you can almost achieve orgasms without physical contact, provided you have a complete connection emotionally and mentally. Just a simple touch can bring both over the edge as you put it.

Question for you: Do you feel that special desire for your mate now? Do you really ache for his/her touch? If not, I recommend you open the line of communications first to see if you can determine what is wrong with your mental life...the physical side will follow.

Hugs honey.

 

[BlueDaisy]

Blue Daisy

Good Sex must start with the mind...the anticipation, the sharing of two bodies, the building of lust and desire.

It doesn't matter which spot gets the stimulation, if you don't stimulate the mind, it's very difficult to stimulate the body. For some reason, our brains and nerve endings are connected (strange concept huh)...and no matter how hard we try to satisfy each other physically, if we aren't emotionally attached, it doesn't work.

On the other hand, I have found that you can almost achieve orgasms without physical contact, provided you have a complete connection emotionally and mentally. Just a simple touch can bring both over the edge as you put it.

Question for you: Do you feel that special desire for your mate now? Do you really ache for his/her touch? If not, I recommend you open the line of communications first to see if you can determine what is wrong with your mental life...the physical side will follow.

Hugs honey.

tn_8tiv,

I think you have hit the nail on the head. We have been emotionally distant for years now. So much stress with the kids (extreme stress, I might add; long story, not going into it here).

With his meds he is so blase about everything, along with having no libido. And these days, I crave the release (deep orgasm, not just a clitoral one) more than the emotional aspect. He is just the opposite. He wants "the setting" and all that. But I think that even if the ambiance were there, it wouldn't really make that much difference. I could be wrong.

I'm really upset with him today because last night I asked him if he would go to the doc and talk to him about this problem with the medicine. He says that he is afraid to, because it took around 10 years for the docs to finally find a combination of meds that brought me out of a deep depression (mine is chemical; his is more situational). I really don't know what he means by that; I think he is just using it as an excuse, but who am I to say what he thinks.

Thanks for your input; you have good points.

Blue

 

[tn_8tiv]

tn_8tiv,

I think you have hit the nail on the head. We have been emotionally distant for years now. So much stress with the kids (extreme stress, I might add; long story, not going into it here).

With his meds he is so blase about everything, along with having no libido. And these days, I crave the release (deep orgasm, not just a clitoral one) more than the emotional aspect. He is just the opposite. He wants "the setting" and all that. But I think that even if the ambiance were there, it wouldn't really make that much difference. I could be wrong.

I'm really upset with him today because last night I asked him if he would go to the doc and talk to him about this problem with the medicine. He says that he is afraid to, because it took around 10 years for the docs to finally find a combination of meds that brought me out of a deep depression (mine is chemical; his is more situational). I really don't know what he means by that; I think he is just using it as an excuse, but who am I to say what he thinks.

Thanks for your input; you have good points.

Blue

This sounds like you are open to communications. If so, then please, for your's and your hubby's sake, seek some professional help. I really believe you still love your husband from the way you talk. A marriage is always worth the effort of saving it.

I wish you the best honey. Hugs and sweet kisses...

 

[BlueDaisy]

This sounds like you are open to communications. If so, then please, for your's and your hubby's sake, seek some professional help. I really believe you still love your husband from the way you talk. A marriage is always worth the effort of saving it.

I wish you the best honey. Hugs and sweet kisses...

Yes, I am, and I think he is, too. He suggested a visit to the therapist our family uses. So we'll be going when she can get us in.

I do love him, but I fear that I'm not "in love" with him. Do you know what I mean?

Blue

 

[Rick2002]

G spot

My wife and I tried this a couple of times. I still can't find it. I placed my thumb in to the base, then bend my thumb down trying to feel the hard nub. It just isn't there.
I did however feel a hard pad deeper just barly at the end of my thumb when I straighten the thumb out. I tried as best I could to massage it. The wife said it did not do anything for her.

Sure wish I could find the darn thing!

 

[MR.GGG]

?

Hey Rick, bummer you can't find it. I'm just wondering how you're doing it. Is the "search" part included in normal foreplay or was it a "OK - we're gonna DO your Gspot." and go for it with no or little build-up.

There are two main themes that come out time after time in this thread and that's that everybody is a little different. Some are a lot different! and # 2 to get the Gspot to fire ESPECIALLY the first few times you do it it is almost universal that it must be incuded as a later part of heavy foreplay, oral stimulation and even intercourse. If the Gspot area is probed when the woman is NOT turned on you're probably NOT going to feel anything. The Gspot has vasocongestive tissue around it so until it is stimulated the area will feel like any other area of the wall of the vagina. When she is really turned on then you should start to feel a slight hardness of the tissue wall in the area I described. Once that hardness becomes apparent then it should be softly maninpulated along with other foreplay. As her level of arousal
increases then you can be forceful with the Gspot area but continue with the other forms of arousal. Once you get an orgasm from that area you can get much more forceful and make it happen over and over again.

The main point being that you have to make this a part of normal lovemaing until the both of you learn where it is, how it feels and you can build her up at the right pace until you are comfortable with it.

Good luck.

 

[Calafia]

Thanks for the info. When the boss get home from work I'm bringing him right to this thread

 

[Rick2002]

G,

we definetly incorporated the search in our foreplay. But still I could not find that sucker.
I will try again. I realize that we can't make it a "we gota do this" type thing

Thanks for your help

 

[BlueDaisy]

HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY

BIRTHDAY

MR.GGG

Blue

 

[acer144]

WE LOVE YOU THANK YOU......

HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY

BIRTHDAY

MR.GGG