*True Confessions*

[nrcma98]

Congrats!!

Congratulations, Red!

 

[omahaman2]

http://www.mouse.webby.com/images/rnbwmrcd.jpg

to all the TCers
and the new TCerettte
thanks to red.

 

[nrcma98]

Confessions of a sort

1. Is this the beginning?
2. Me preocupan
3. A 20 minute conversation made my Saturday.
4. 21 hours to go
5. I can hardly wait
6. Boy, are my hands tired

 

[omahaman2]

Re: Confessions of a sort

1. Is this the beginning?
2. Me preocupan
3. A 20 minute conversation made my Saturday.
4. 21 hours to go
5. I can hardly wait
6. Boy, are my hands tired

Hope things work out the way you want jeff.
Glad someones saturday worked out!!!
We went to a blues festival last night
not knowing of the tornado warning
in nearby areas
Just before the artist
we came to see came on
the torrential downpour started
After the lonnnnnnng walk to the car,
we ended up drenched.
At least we had a reason to cuddle at home.

 

[omahaman2]

Really Important Stuff My Kids Taught Me

Picking your nose when no one else is looking is still picking your nose.

Just keep banging until someone opens the door.

Making your bed is a waste of time.

There is no good reason why clothes have to match.

Even Popeye didn't eat his spinach until he absolutely had to.

If your dog doesn't like someone, you probably shouldn't either.

Toads aren't ugly, they're just toads.

Don't pop someone else's bubble.

You work so hard peddling up the hill that you hate to brake on the way down.

If you stand on tiptoe to be measured this year, you'll have to stand on tiptoe for the rest of your life.

You can't ask to start over just because you're losing the game.

Chasing the cat is more fun than catching it.

Make your mother proud of you

 

[omahaman2]

In 1997, Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch (M-LAW) began a contest to expose how frivolous lawsuits, and a concern about potential frivolous lawsuits, have led to a new cultural phenomenon: the wacky warning label.

You have probably heard about the lawsuit over a spilled cup of coffee. However, there are many other silly lawsuits involving products that have received far less attention. For example, did you know a man received $50,000 when he sued a small company that makes basketball nets because he claimed the company was responsible when he caught his teeth in a net while dunking a ball? People who make products hear about these outrageous lawsuits, and they often decide to slap common sense warnings on their product... "just in case."

Over the years, M-LAW has received hundreds of warning labels from people around the world. M-LAW verifies the authenticity of each label and selects the "Top 5" for each year.

Following is a list of some of the best labels from the first five contests:

A warning on an electric router made for carpenters cautions: "This product not intended for use as a dental drill."

A warning label found on a baby stroller cautions the user to "Remove child before folding."

A prescription of sleeping pills says, "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

A sticker on a toilet at a public facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan actually warns: "Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking."

A massage chair warns: "DO NOT use massage chair without clothing... and, never force any body part into the backrest area while the rollers are moving."

A snowblower warns: "Do not use snowthrower on roof."

A dishwasher carries this warning: "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher."

A CD player carries this unusual warning: "Do not use the Ultradisc2000 as a projectile in a catapult."

An "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter cautions, "Do not use near fire, flame or sparks."

A label on a hand-held massager advises consumers not to use "while sleeping or unconscious."

A container of underarm deodorant says, "Caution: Do not spray in eyes."

A cartridge for a laser printer warns, "Do not eat toner."

A household iron warns users: "Never iron clothes while they are being worn."

A label with a hair dryer reads, "Never use hair dryer while sleeping."

A 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow warns: "Not intended for highway use."

A cardboard car sunshield that keeps sun off the dashboard warns, "Do not drive with sunshield in place."

A Bathroom Heater says: "This product is not to be used in bathrooms."

A can of self-defense pepper spray warns users: "May irritate eyes."

A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists says: "Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover."

A popular manufactured fireplace log warns: "Caution - Risk of Fire."

A box of birthday cake candles says: "DO NOT use soft wax as ear plugs or for any other function that involves insertion into a body cavity."

 

[InLust]

You naked all alone? Damn shame.

On the bright side it's past 5 o'clock in Alberta, so you can all officially have a drink now.

Actually it was past 6 here when I posted that....And I did have that drink.....I have discoverd Samual Adams and it is a mighty fine Ale

 

[InLust]

Re: T Bird

In erotic "Baby Blue".

That is indeed a beauty!!! Mine is nowhere near that nice.....but it gets me where I need to be

 

[InLust]

Hey! Don't disrespect the signature!



Did I ever mention my near erotic fasination with classic Thunderbirds?



Ok... One, me neither; Two, the best relationships I've had have been with married or attached women; Three. YES! Rock on!; Four, capturing the mental image in my head.

Well Sweet Cheeks, that signature is rather long....no disrepect intended, just stating a fact.

It would seem you have a "near erotic fasination" with just about anything that moves or might move

Hope you had a great weekend and got time to celebrate those 2 very huge events.....BTW, I didn't see any mention here of you passing that certification on your second try.....if you are gonna beat yourself up publiclly, then ya gotta stroke yourself publiclly too

 

[Wintermute]

if you are gonna beat yourself up publiclly, then ya gotta stroke yourself publiclly too

I'd get arrested... Again.

 

[1fiestyredhead]

And better news... your at least road trip distance to Florida and visa versa. I haven't seen NC since I moved when I was 8.

Dreams go on and you'll have no problem getting a place. Trust me.

No one could ever displace you.

Don't make me say I told you so... again.

Me too. I just got some memory cards for my digital camera.

x12 & by the thousands

Would it be wrong of me to tell you I love you?

Thanks for your support hon...and is it ever wrong to tell someone that??

 

[1fiestyredhead]

for Red

Congrats on you new baby girl hun!!

 

[omahaman2]

GOOOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING EVERYONE!!!!!!
To bring back something we used to have
when henry frequented
dropping off
http://www.bakecrafters.com/images/front/muffins.jpg

I think ill make it even more special
by leaving

http://www.proppersource.com/images/foods/break-can-bacon-eggs.jpg

 

[DreamOfSun]

Happy Monday everyone!

 

[nrcma98]

Happy Monday everyone!

I'm trying to speak, but no matter what I do, I just can't seem to make any sound.

And you took the words right out of my mouth
It must have been while you were kissin me...

Can you tell I'm a Meat Loaf fan??

Nice sig

 

[~Dream~]

Happy Monday everyone!

happy Moday To you also sweety

Hope these darn storms quit soon ..makes for a bad day...

 

[DreamOfSun]

Confession: It amazes me how two tiny words can bring forth so many overwhelming emotions.

 

[Curious_Fem]

Congrats on the safe delivery Red! Glad to hear mother and baby are doing well. But I have to tell you, my jaw dropped when I read how much she weighed! That's almost a pound more than my biggest! So congrats again.

Hope everyone had a good weekend.

 

[nrcma98]

Funnies

Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder
1. All the DNA is the same.
2. There are no dental records.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you
tell me how long it'll take to fly from San
Francisco to New York City?"
The agent replies, "Just a minute..."
"Thank you," the blonde says, and hangs up.

___________________________________________________

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder
of Juan Gonzalez.
"How was he killed?" asked one detective.
"With a golf gun," the other detective replied.
"A golf gun?! What is a golf gun?"
"I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan."

___________________________________________________

New Sex Study...
It has been determined that the most used sexual
position for married couples is a doggie position.
The husband sits up and begs. The wife rolls over
and plays dead.

___________________________________________________

This guy has been sitting in a bar all night,
staring at a blonde wearing the tightest pants he's
ever seen. Finally his curiosity gets the best of
him, so he walks over and asks, "How do you get into
those pants?"
The young woman looks him over and replies, "Well,
you could start by buying me a drink."

___________________________________________________

A man is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks
him how he is feeling. "I'm O.K. but I didn't like
the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery," he
answered. "What did he say," asked the nurse.
"OOPS!"

___________________________________________________
Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old
granddaughter and beeped the horn by mistake. She
turned and looked at him for an explanation.
He said, "I did that by accident."
She replied, "I know that, Grandpa."
He replied, "How did you know?"
She said, "Because you didn't say "asshole!"
afterwards



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

[Jewelz]

Congrats Red! Sending love and hugs your way. I wish your family all the best!

Thanks to everyone who sent congrats and warm wishes for my anniversary! We had a beautiful night, as expected. (and every woman should own a bullet.. *shivers*....mmmhmmm)

 

[Wintermute]

Congrats Red! Sending love and hugs your way. I wish your family all the best!

Thanks to everyone who sent congrats and warm wishes for my anniversary! We had a beautiful night, as expected. (and every woman should own a bullet.. *shivers*....mmmhmmm)

The girl I was seeing for a while and I were toying around (pardon the pun) of a radio controled egg. We both sing karaoke and well. Lets just say it would have made for some very interesting high notes during her turn at the mic.

To bad we never got the chance.

 

[nrcma98]

Pharmacy

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles.


The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.


He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.


She directs him down the correct aisle.


A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.


Confused, she says, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?"


"It's like this," he replied, "yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers 'cause it's sooooooooooo much cheaper.


"So, I figure if I have to roll my own so does she."

 

[Curious_Fem]

Re: Pharmacy

Ask me about my new website

From your sigline. Well?

And I also meant to ask....what was so wrong with the pic you linked ... on the previous page, I think?

 

[nrcma98]

Two robins were sitting in a tree. "I'm really hungry," said the first one. "Let's fly down and find some lunch." They flew down to the ground and found a nice plot of newly plowed ground that was full of worms. They ate and ate and ate till they could eat no more. "I m so full, I don't think I can fly back up into the tree," said the first one. "Let's just lay back here and bask in the warm sun," said the second. "O K," said the first. So they plopped down, basking in the sun. No sooner than they had fallen asleep, when a big fat tomcat up and gobbled them up. As the cat sat washing his face after his meal, he thought, "I JUST LOVE BASKIN ROBINS."

 

[DreamOfSun]

Thanks to everyone who sent congrats and warm wishes for my anniversary! We had a beautiful night, as expected. (and every woman should own a bullet.. *shivers*....mmmhmmm)

*nodding head vigorously*

Hi, love.