Too Full to Fuck???

[MelissaBaby]

https://www.thecut.com/2020/11/too-full-to-f-cazzie-david-book-excerpt.html

For straight couples, there is one key difference be*tween sex for the male and for the female: a woman gets a penis inserted into her while a man gets to insert his penis into someone else. That’s all nice and good. Sex is pleasurable for both genders. But from what I’ve discovered, only one gender has to save room in her body if a penis is to go into it — mean*ing that sometimes, if you’ve eaten a hearty meal, there isn’t enough room for a penis.

Sure, women can eat and then have sex. But they really can’t eat a lot. You know the saying “You can always make room for dessert”? Well, you can’t always make room for a dick. Especially if you’ve eaten dessert.

Sometimes I’m just too full to have sex. I don’t know for sure if this is something other girls experience or just me, because I’ve never heard any of them discuss it. Maybe it’s supposed to be kept secret among us girls, information so sensitive that we cannot risk releasing it in conversation. Or maybe I’m actually the only one who gets too full to be able to have sex, and if that’s the case, then pretend this never happened.

Male writers, do not believe this for a minute if you are trying to write realistic female characters. It is complete nonsense. Yes, you can get that bloated feeling when you've eaten too much, but apparently, this chick doesn't know where her stomach is located.

Besides, given the choice between ice cream and dick, nine out of ten women will choose ice cream.

 

[JuanaSalsa]

That's hilarious.

If that were true I'd never fuck, because I fucking love to eat. Good thing for me that's not the case.

Well, I did try the whole whipped cream thing once and I found that there a limit to how much whipped cream I can lick off and still want more, and that limit was reached too early. Not as much fun as I imagined, sadly.

 

[NotWise]

I wonder if she was just making that up so she'd have something to write.

 

[Panty Wrangler]

"a woman gets a penis inserted into her while a man gets to insert his penis into someone else"

Well now there's a limiting view! Are we only allowed sex positions where the guy is resting his weight on his partner so that it bears down on his/her stomach? What about doggy? What about oral? What about pegging!!!!! I wan't pegging!

Ooops, sorry. Got carried away there.

 

[ScrappyPaperDoodler]

Sounds like a good way to compensate for a less endowed partner. Just eat more and he'll feel bigger...

On a more serious note, opinion pieces like this are sadly common and they all boil down to making sex seem like a chore or something so mechanical it's devoid of pleasure.

 

[PeytonMirabelle]

I admit, I saw the topic and came to this thinking someone might eat too much and feel sluggish and not up to a lot of any physical activity, including fucking, and my response was, "Well, yeah, we've all been there. We've all stuffed ourselves to the point of feeling ill."

This was ... something else altogether and I left the article scratching my head. This also reminds me why humanity is doomed.

 

[Comshaw]

That's hilarious.

If that were true I'd never fuck, because I fucking love to eat. Good thing for me that's not the case.

Well, I did try the whole whipped cream thing once and I found that there a limit to how much whipped cream I can lick off and still want more, and that limit was reached too early. Not as much fun as I imagined, sadly.

*Whipped cream story*

My little brother and his girlfriend got drunk one night and decided to try the whipped cream thing. They got two or three cans of the stuff and proceeded to have fun. After an hour or so of licking and fucking they both passed out. He said that when they woke in the morning and he tried to get out of bed, he couldn't because the damned sheets were glued to them. According to his account it took them a good 20 minutes to peel the sheets off, along with some hair and in places some outer skin. Take whatever moral you want from that. For me, it's when your drunk stuff can (and will) go sideways.

Comshaw

 

[DCO_65]

Actually it's a physical phenomenon known as cranio-rectal inversion where-- for reasons unknown to medical science certain structures in the body "trade spaces" developing in non-standard locations. The stomach being where on most people the bladder is located, a full stomach pushes down hard on the vaginal canal making PiV sex painful or very difficult. This mostly happens when the woman's partner has a typical 14 inch long penis that is 8 inches in circumference. These women also often have their hymens develop in odd places like behind or on top of the oz. Often their uteruses develop at the end of their vaginal canal as well.

Unlike many under represented minorities-- at least in American culture-- those with cranio-rectal inversion are massively over represented.

--Ms. Irma Verybigliar Ph.D



(pile higher and deeper)

 

[JuanaSalsa]

*Whipped cream story*

My little brother and his girlfriend got drunk one night and decided to try the whipped cream thing. They got two or three cans of the stuff and proceeded to have fun. After an hour or so of licking and fucking they both passed out. He said that when they woke in the morning and he tried to get out of bed, he couldn't because the damned sheets were glued to them. According to his account it took them a good 20 minutes to peel the sheets off, along with some hair and in places some outer skin. Take whatever moral you want from that. For me, it's when your drunk stuff can (and will) go sideways.

Comshaw

Lol. Maybe I was missing the alcohol for it to be more fun, I mean until the next day. But two or three cans? I was tired of it before we finished one.

 

[JuanaSalsa]

With or without alcohol, it sounds more fun than it ever is.

Most food+sex things are so much more hassle than they are worth. Except for popsicles... those can be fun. (Fun thing I learned recently: Popsicle is trademarked and they defend their trademark because of how often it's used in the generic sense.)

I have a frozen banana in the freezer that I've been eyeing speculatively for a week now.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

Most food+sex things are so much more hassle than they are worth.

9 1/2 Weeks has a lot to answer for.

That's about how long it took to clean up an incident involving yoghurt, once...

Sushi and a naked woman can be an entertaining combination, but I suspect would be even better if the woman weren't having to act as a plate.

 

[DCO_65]

Most food+sex things are so much more hassle than they are worth. Except for popsicles... those can be fun...

Get the silicone molds and make your own in the freezer

Use the fresh veggis first, then destroy the evidence by making a salad.

 

[Emirus]

Many times after a heavy meal my body feels bloated but unfortunately it’s not the part of my body I would like bloated. As for this woman, after reading her article, I don’t know what she’s been eating but I do know by which orifice it’s exiting.

 

[lovecraft68]

https://www.thecut.com/2020/11/too-full-to-f-cazzie-david-book-excerpt.html




Male writers, do not believe this for a minute if you are trying to write realistic female characters. It is complete nonsense. Yes, you can get that bloated feeling when you've eaten too much, but apparently, this chick doesn't know where her stomach is located.

Besides, given the choice between ice cream and dick, nine out of ten women will choose ice cream.

This is one of those times where I stop and think, someone not only believes this, but felt the need to share.

I'd like to think no one would need to be told that's ludicrous.

No wonder people thing guys are clueless about women

 

[TxRad]

LC, some women are clueless about women.

Whip cream is one thing but be very careful with Marshmallow cream. You can use less but get in many more licks.

 

[lovecraft68]

LC, some women are clueless about women.

Whip cream is one thing but be very careful with Marshmallow cream. You can use less but get in many more licks.

Popsicles are more fun, especially when you share them.

 

[DCO_65]

Whip cream is one thing but be very careful...

Yeah, keep it SSC (Sane Safe Consensual) with WHIP cream...

 

[LAHomedog]

Well, you've got to write about something titillating to sell your story and get paid...

The problem is it reads like an eating disorder to me -- anorexia maybe -- and that is a serious thing. I watched Karen Carpenter the years shrink to skin and bones and it was a sad and tragic thing.

I know that through decades of having sex, the only time my wife was "too full" to have sex was when she was pregnant and that's understandable.

 

[DCO_65]

... the only time my wife was "too full" to have sex was when she was pregnant and that's understandable.

A good position for PiV when the Postmaster General has just issued your uterus its own Zip Code:

Get the woman flat on her back at a level higher than most mattresses. We put a futon cushion on a sturdy wood table. That way the man can stand at the edge and, holding her legs straight up, slide her to the edge for a horizontal entry. We found that if the oaken surface was nicely waxed my lover could hold my upstretched legs against his chest and slide me onto him as he thrust into me. Contact would push me a little bit away and he would pull me back into him as he thrust again.

Better workout than an elliptical machine.

 

[LAHomedog]

A good position for PiV when the Postmaster General has just issued your uterus its own Zip Code:

Get the woman flat on her back at a level higher than most mattresses. We put a futon cushion on a sturdy wood table. That way the man can stand at the edge and, holding her legs straight up, slide her to the edge for a horizontal entry. We found that if the oaken surface was nicely waxed my lover could hold my upstretched legs against his chest and slide me onto him as he thrust into me. Contact would push me a little bit away and he would pull me back into him as he thrust again.

Better workout than an elliptical machine.

Well, thanks for the tip but I'm 70 and my wife is 67 and those days are "a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away."

You might use that in a story though...

 

[JuanaSalsa]

A good position for PiV when the Postmaster General has just issued your uterus its own Zip Code:

Get the woman flat on her back at a level higher than most mattresses. We put a futon cushion on a sturdy wood table. That way the man can stand at the edge and, holding her legs straight up, slide her to the edge for a horizontal entry. We found that if the oaken surface was nicely waxed my lover could hold my upstretched legs against his chest and slide me onto him as he thrust into me. Contact would push me a little bit away and he would pull me back into him as he thrust again.

Better workout than an elliptical machine.

I was having sex at 40+ weeks. You know, they say it can induce labor. It did not, very annoyingly. I also made my husband go on a mile long walk with me on a hot day (which he did not think was a good idea), put together some bookshelves, and tried eating spicy food.

All that and zero contractions. Had to be induced, then a c-section. Stubborn fucking kid.

 

[jomar]

Well, when I was in grad school a fair bunch of folk who had coupled up went out for a wild night on the town with everyone fully expecting the evening to end with sexy times. But our mistake was to eat Mexican and everyone got full, then tired, then sleepy. So yeah, too full to fuck.

 

[NotWise]

I was having sex at 40+ weeks. You know, they say it can induce labor. It did not, very annoyingly. I also made my husband go on a mile long walk with me on a hot day (which he did not think was a good idea), put together some bookshelves, and tried eating spicy food.

All that and zero contractions. Had to be induced, then a c-section. Stubborn fucking kid.

Spicy food worked for both my wife and her sister, and we didn't even plan it. I fed her sister Sichuan Beef and my wife took her to the hospital right after dinner. I took my wife out for New Mexican food and her contractions started at the restaurant. We were home for an hour or so before we went to the hospital.

 

[JuanaSalsa]

Spicy food worked for both my wife and her sister, and we didn't even plan it. I fed her sister Sichuan Beef and my wife took her to the hospital right after dinner. I took my wife out for New Mexican food and her contractions started at the restaurant. We were home for an hour or so before we went to the hospital.

I'm very jealous!

 

[DCO_65]

Had to be induced, then a c-section. Stubborn fucking kid.

Knew where s/he was, didn't wan't to leave... Smart kid