Too Flippant?

[destinie21]

OK folks I have yet another multi-part question.

The first part of this question is can a character be too flippant or alternately can a character be too sarcastic. This all came about from a RL incident I recently experienced

The second is a RL question. Whats wrong with people? I know this is a broad and all encompassing question so I suppose I'll have to back it up with a story.

Today a guy that I work with found out that K and i were "Married". (I don't know where he's been)of course he pressed that two woman can't get married. I broke it down for him and told him we had gotten a commitment ceremony. He dismissed the explanation and gave me the usual rundown on how the right man could fix me. then in regards to the relationship he asked "Is it serious" I said "We often joke around". He asked if I could try to answer a question without being flippant I suppose I* could certainly try.
Again whats wrong with people?

 

[Ms. Jones]

I think he has a preconceived notion of where women fit into the world...and since you don't fit his 'mold', he's going to pick at everything you do or say. He's obviously not going to ever understand. I wouldn't waste too much sleep over the guy unless you really want to make him understand you and your lifestyle.

Being flippant is a good way to avoid telling someone to shove it where the sun don't shine!

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Ms. Jones put it sweetly, I'll say it in plain english, he's a male chauvinist dickhead. You weren't being flippant, you were being polite. You had already answered his question, it just wasn't the answer he wanted to hear. Asking the same question with slight rephrasing until you get an answer other than the one you got originally is rude, crude and boorish. Simply put he is ignorant and socially would be unaceptable at any party that didn't involve a keg.

I am usually very quiet and shy, but this kind of attitude really sets me off. He needs a good swift kick in the butt and a lesson in manners. You were far from flippant, you were a damn sight nicer than he deserved.

-Colly

 

[Seattle Zack]

Joke 'em if they can't take a fuck .....

 

[oggbashan]

He doesn't understand.

My opinion on the question you asked:

He may have been trying to get to understand and your answer to the question "Is it serious?" was not what he expected. He might have expected something like the statements you have made in the AH about how much your partner means to you.

If you had answered like that he may well have been startled, but he would have had the beginnings of an understanding of a relationship that is beyond his experience.

However, I may be wrong. His tone of voice and body language might have dictated your response.

Inappropriate humour is often a defence mechanism when faced with a situation you can't handle. If he had become aware of your marriage in an unfortunate way he might have thought his colleagues were joking. That might account for his unfortunate reaction on finding that the marriage is real.

My question to you is: Would you have expected that reaction from him from your previous conversations? If not then I suspect that he was both surprised and embarrassed. His remarks as you report them don't sound hostile. First reactions are not always good ones.


Og

 

[Icingsugar]

can a character be too flippant or alternately can a character be too sarcastic.

As always, I'd say it depends on the context. In a set of otherwise balanced characters one too stereotypical might stand out like a wart on the nose.

Whats wrong with people?

Other than being people you mean? I wouldn't go as far as calling that guy a male chauvinist dickhead. He just lives in a very small world, and is not capable of handling himself socially utside of it, and in the process also turns into an impolite prick. Either have pity on the fool and try to educate him, or fuck it.

I vouch for the latter.

 

[oggbashan]

Either have pity on the fool and try to educate him, or fuck it.

I vouch for the latter.

Since you and he work in the same place, I disagree with Icingsugar. Somehow you and he have to move on.

Og

 

[Uncle Meat]

Since you and he work in the same place, I disagree with Icingsugar. Somehow you and he have to move on.

Og

The question I'd ask myself is, is he educatable? If so, is he worth the trouble? Have you seen redeeming qualities in him? Do you have to interact with him a lot?

 

[damppanties]

can a character be too flippant or alternately can a character be too sarcastic.

Yes. If the RL incident is an exampe of the 'too flippant' or 'too sarcastic' character then I like it already. About the guy and the incident, it doesn't matter. Thinking and stewing about it is not worth it.

 

[Weird Harold]

The first part of this question is can a character be too flippant or alternately can a character be too sarcastic.

The short answer is "NO."

The long answer is that being too flippant or too sarcastic can make a character into a parody of a flippant or sarcastic person.

If you do't want the character to be a parody or stereotype, then you can take any aspect of the characteriszation too far. It all depends on how youwant the character perceived. IRL, there are people who are sarcastic or flippant far beyond the bounds of good taste.

RE your co-worker: A swift kick in his "brains" might cure him of his Male Chauvinist Pig attitude, but I doubt it. It would cause more problems than the momentary satisfaction of watching him double up in agony is worth.

 

[ffreak]

Sorry, Mrs. D, I've been sleeping on the job again.

You, flippant, sarcastic, these are just things that go together and one of the reasons I love you - you are a really good person and you spend way too much effort worrying about people who should know better.

Don't change.

It's also part of why you have such a good voice here at Lit - your poetry is able to get emotions across because you are emotional. If you weren't, well then maybe you would just be flippant and sarcastic - but you aren't. You react, you tear into things and examine them, and then you let us know what you find. This is the job of a poet and a storyteller.

Real life includes people whom we cannot control and trying to understand them enriches our experience, even the idiots that should be wearing signs around their necks.

Happiness is the most important treasure we can 'happen' upon in this life. You've found yours, if other people haven't found theirs, they may not understand how or why anyone else should be so privileged.

-FF (I'm kinda partial to Mrs. Jones, too, for making you so happy)
ps. wowzer on the AV.

 

[pop_54]

Hmmmmmmm

Not that you'll take any notice of what I say, but it's not just a male thing with you and K, you'd get the same or harsher treatment at the local church hall from the old dear's who man the guns of so called normality there.

All narrow minded and set in their ways like your male associate.

Either ignore the guy and move on, or fight him, up to you, I'd recommend move on and ignore. A fight will only result in more grief for you, he's too thick to be hurt.

Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit they say, flippant, what the hell's the true definition of that, must look it up one day.

pops........

 

[destinie21]

Re: Hmmmmmmm

Not that you'll take any notice of what I say, but it's not just a male thing with you and K, you'd get the same or harsher treatment at the local church hall from the old dear's who man the guns of so called normality there.

All narrow minded and set in their ways like your male associate.

Either ignore the guy and move on, or fight him, up to you, I'd recommend move on and ignore. A fight will only result in more grief for you, he's too thick to be hurt.

Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit they say, flippant, what the hell's the true definition of that, must look it up one day.

pops........

Why wouldn't I llisten to you? (not a bit of sarcasm there either)
In any case I do have to say thank you to everyone who responded. I do want to clear up a misconception though. Just because I comment or vent about something doesn't mean that I was offended or even effected by it. I was just getting it off my chest. Believe me if dwelt on every jackass and zealot who had something asinine to say I'd have a list a backlogged list a mile long.
Still you guys are Fabulous and I don't use the F word lightly.

 

[pop_54]

Re: Re: Hmmmmmmm

Why wouldn't I llisten to you? (not a bit of sarcasm there either)
In any case I do have to say thank you to everyone who responded. I do want to clear up a misconception though. Just because I comment or vent about something doesn't mean that I was offended or even effected by it. I was just getting it off my chest. Believe me if dwelt on every jackass and zealot who had something asinine to say I'd have a list a backlogged list a mile long.
Still you guys are Fabulous and I don't use the F word lightly.

Wow that's a result, would you mind having a word with my wifey love, very I rare I get taken any notice of

 

[destinie21]

Sure pops I tell her she should give you a listen once in a while. Course if she's anything like me she won't listen to some broad she doesn't know

 

[pop_54]

Ha

Sure pops I tell her she should give you a listen once in a while. Course if she's anything like me she won't listen to some broad she doesn't know

Don't you believe it love, she likes listening to girls occasionally

 

[RenzaJones]

C'mon D you're not at all flippant, you're always being serious in your sarcasm.

 

[Icingsugar]

Since you and he work in the same place, I disagree with Icingsugar. Somehow you and he have to move on.

Og

That's exactly why I'd boink the idea of trying to educate someone. I have dealt with lots of uncomfortable, prejudice people, where I had had no other choice than to keep doing that. I've found that it's then easier to drop the subject on which we disagree than to keep on haggling. Sometimes it doesn't matter if you're right, it's too much of a hassle to convince ppl of it. Sure. It's a chicken approach. But it actually works.

A common scenario:
Someone: "...if it wasn't for all the foreigners coming here stealing our jobs."
Me: "Hey, are you going on that lunch meeting tomorow?"
Someone: "Yeah, I think so. Anyway as I was saying, the fucking muslims..."
Me: "Come on, will you or wont you? Ok, whatever. If you do, can you tell them that I'll be joining in, but that I'll be a little late, Ok?"
Someone: "Ok."
Me: "Great. Well, I gotta go. Adios!"

 

[wornoutkeyboard]

Well...

Depends on your definition of flippant.

One definition is: (dictionary.com)

flippant

\Flip"pant\, a. [Prov. E. flip to move nimbly; cf. W. llipa soft, limber, pliant, or Icel. fleipa to babble, prattle. Cf. Flip, Fillip, Flap, Flipper.] 1. Of smooth, fluent, and rapid speech; speaking with ease and rapidity; having a voluble tongue; talkative.

It becometh good men, in such cases, to be flippant and free in their speech. --Barrow.



I would take it as a compliment.

~WOK (who would take it as a compliment, no matter what you said)