three-somes, how to get started

[Tboner]

My girlfriend and I are very interested in having another woman join us in the bedroom for hot sex, experimentation, etc.

My question is this, how do we find that person? We're an attractive couple, but you can't just go up to anyone in the bar and ask if they want to come home with us. People would think we're freaks or something.

On the other hand, escort/dating services are quite expensive and it kind of takes away from the thrill if you have to go and pay someone to come home with you.

My girlfriend doesn't want our threesome to be with someone we know, so friends are out of the question.

Does anyone have any suggestions or advice?

Thanks in advanced.

T.

 

[Bandit58]

Have you thought about joining a personals site? It might take a while and you'd have to do quite a bit of sorting through to get the wheat from the chaff, but this isn't something you want to jump into straight off the bat anyway.

I have met a lovely woman through a site here in Australia - though I was only looking for 1 on 1 sex there are plenty of women there who enjoy swinging with couples. Give it a try

 

[shootermcgavin69]

You mean you are interested in having another woman. Your wife would love a cock much more.

My girlfriend and I are very interested in having another woman join us in the bedroom for hot sex, experimentation, etc.

My question is this, how do we find that person? We're an attractive couple, but you can't just go up to anyone in the bar and ask if they want to come home with us. People would think we're freaks or something.

On the other hand, escort/dating services are quite expensive and it kind of takes away from the thrill if you have to go and pay someone to come home with you.

My girlfriend doesn't want our threesome to be with someone we know, so friends are out of the question.

Does anyone have any suggestions or advice?

Thanks in advanced.

T.

 

[blkmack]

My girlfriend and I are very interested in having another woman join us in the bedroom for hot sex, experimentation, etc.

My question is this, how do we find that person? We're an attractive couple, but you can't just go up to anyone in the bar and ask if they want to come home with us. People would think we're freaks or something.

On the other hand, escort/dating services are quite expensive and it kind of takes away from the thrill if you have to go and pay someone to come home with you.

My girlfriend doesn't want our threesome to be with someone we know, so friends are out of the question.

Does anyone have any suggestions or advice?

Thanks in advanced.

T.

INTERNET is a wonderful thing

 

[Tboner]

Seriously,

I would love to be with another woman, but my girlfriend also wants to experiment too. We've talked about it for awhile and she wants some ground rules in place.

1. no penetration. This sucks for me, but she says that we can do anything else.

2. She doesn't want to be ignored. ( I can handle this one)

3. She doesn't want it to be with someone we know and socialize with.

Since I've posted this message, I've gotten close to setting something up. We threw a big house party a few weeks ago and this 19 year old and her roommate showed up.

She's petite, attractive, and into experimentating. She was kissing her female roomate all night. She's bi-sexual.

Anyway to make a long story short, she called and we talked about stuff and she mentioned how much she liked us and wouldn't mind "trying" things with us if we were interested.

I haven't told my girlfriend. We're going to surprise her one night.

Wish me luck.

Thanks to everyone who responded with suggestions. I'll keep ya all informed. Maybe if I can, I'll post some pics of them.

 

[Eilan]

I haven't told my girlfriend. We're going to surprise her one night.

Unless she's already given you permission to set something up, this is a very, VERY bad idea. There's no way in hell my husband would spring someone else on me without asking me first.

Threesomes aren't something to be taken lightly. That's why I think ALL decisions should be made as a couple.

 

[Tboner]

thanks for the advice.

I guess I'm going to have to cool my jets for a little bit and talk to her some more. Any tips?

we're still fairly new in our relationships and jealousy and trust issues can definitely come up if this "fantasy" doesn't go right.

thanks for the advice and warning.

T.

 

[SweetErika]

thanks for the advice.

I guess I'm going to have to cool my jets for a little bit and talk to her some more. Any tips?

we're still fairly new in our relationships and jealousy and trust issues can definitely come up if this "fantasy" doesn't go right.

thanks for the advice and warning.

T.

Some great tips are to be had in these threads:
https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=332777
https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=198771
https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=201674
https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=322529

 

[Tboner]

wow,

after reading those threads, I hope I don't come off as a confused as some of those people.

THat's a real eye opener.

No need to ruin a good thing just to satisfy a fantasy at all costs.

thanks for helping this newbie see the Light in a manner of speaking.

I think I'll wait for awhile and see what happens.

T.

 

[silverwhisper]

tboner: i haven't had a chance to reply to this thread until now. let me tell you my story.

i was dating a woman years ago. we were both sexual adventurers. we were visiting a friend of mine and he's pretty open-minded that way as well. we gave it a whirl, not realizing how things might go.

i didn't speak w/ my friend for about a year afterwards. we didn't talk about that night for a good 5 years after. the stupidest little stuff can become a problem in threesomes. whose cock did she like better, who did she want in her first, or last, or most; whose did she want where? you get the idea.

jealousy is a very powerful force and it isn't solely the province of men.

ed

 

[Jayzzzy]

been there

MY SO and I have been in a year long MMF. I has been a lot of fun, but it also requires work.
Communication is the key...it sounds hokey but everyone must be on the same page.
Set boundries and respect them.
Jealousy is bound to rear it's ugly head, but at the slightest hint....talk about it...reassure each other of your committment to each other.
I'm 42 and my SO is 51. Our third is a super hot 24 year old male. He was a friend before we started this and our friendship with him has grown. We spend alot of time just hanging out and having fun. Sex is just a part of our relationship. But boy oh boy the sex is fun. Before we started this our 20 year relationship was kind of in a rut. I was losing interest in sex and my So was frustrated. Our friend came around at the right time and now I enjoy sex way way more than before. Sex between my SO and I has improved. I am more open and willing to try new things now. A year ago I never would have imagined that I would enjoy ass play and being spanked. OH boy.. I did not know what I was missing. Anyway, take your time and find the right person and have fun....we do

 

[cndallas]

My girlfriend and I are very interested in having another woman join us in the bedroom for hot sex, experimentation, etc.


T.

at least you're half way there. I still need to find 2 others. LOL.

 

[Tboner]

extremely helpful advice

That's some really good advice and I really do appreciate the real life scenarios that people have posted. It puts things into a more realistic setting ( instead fo the fantasy world we all want to live in)

I guess the bottom line is this. We all are around sexual themes, settings, people and images all of the time.

For me, it just seems that since I saw my first porn video, a three-some has always been on my mind.

In high school, college, and through out adult hood, I would hear friends, acquaintances, strangers brag about three-somes and how good it was. Now I know that the majority of them were full of shit and it was just part of the male ego and bravado to talk about it.

It wasn't until just recently did I see the other side of what damage three-somes can have on a relationship if not planned or done right or if the mind-set of the participants are not in synch with one another.

The advice and real life experiences of people on this board is more true and helpful than any book written by so called sex experts.

I thank everyone sincerely for sharing and giving me reasons to approach with caution.

My relationship is much more important than to fullfill a fantasy at all cost. Some people have said that once you do the fantasy, it loses it's luster, it's appeal.

I'll compare a fantasy to a brass ring on a carousel. You keep reaching for it and it's exciting. Once you do reach it, the ride's over.

Thanks everyone. j

T.

 

[SweetErika]

That's some really good advice and I really do appreciate the real life scenarios that people have posted. It puts things into a more realistic setting ( instead fo the fantasy world we all want to live in)

I guess the bottom line is this. We all are around sexual themes, settings, people and images all of the time.

For me, it just seems that since I saw my first porn video, a three-some has always been on my mind.

In high school, college, and through out adult hood, I would hear friends, acquaintances, strangers brag about three-somes and how good it was. Now I know that the majority of them were full of shit and it was just part of the male ego and bravado to talk about it.

It wasn't until just recently did I see the other side of what damage three-somes can have on a relationship if not planned or done right or if the mind-set of the participants are not in synch with one another.

The advice and real life experiences of people on this board is more true and helpful than any book written by so called sex experts.

I thank everyone sincerely for sharing and giving me reasons to approach with caution.

My relationship is much more important than to fullfill a fantasy at all cost. Some people have said that once you do the fantasy, it loses it's luster, it's appeal.

I'll compare a fantasy to a brass ring on a carousel. You keep reaching for it and it's exciting. Once you do reach it, the ride's over.

Thanks everyone. j

T.

That's refreshing... often people will ask for advice, and when it doesn't match what they want to hear, they get angry and/or choose to do it anyway.

I think you've said this very well, and sound like a guy with a ton of common sense. I've learned so much here too from the sharing of experiences and litsters bringing up aspects I'd never thought of.

I've had a few experiences with three- and foursomes, and thankfully most of them HAVE been as good as the fantasy. However, I can see how things easily could have gone awry in all of them had we not communicated and been really careful to go through all of the worst-case scenarios time and time again. I've found that how you deal with it afterwards is key...I've been inclined not to talk about it, but the most successful ones were those in which we kind of forced ourselves to talk about everything in the aftermath.

Whatever you decide for the future, I hope all goes well for everyone!