Three More

[cheeryorchid]

Okay, I'm not too proud to beg.
I need three more votes on my Nude Day Story to qualify. Maybe it's too late, but for just my integrity, would some kind soul please read and vote for my story,

Moonlight Serenade

from the Nude Day contest.
And since I'm begging. I have another story that needs three votes to get over the voting hump.
it's called

Meet Quinn Rigley, and it's in erotic couplings.

Forgive me for not linking them to this post. I don't know how.

Thank you
the CheeryOrchid

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Here's your link:

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=149622

---dr.M.

 

[cheeryorchid]

thanks

Thanks for the link, Dr. I appreciate it greatly.

Thanks to anyone that read my little fledgling stories. I appreciate the support. Ya'll are nice folks, says the southern belle.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Hi, Southern Belle. I found your story very interesting and romantic. I voted but I do have a few things to say besides that.

Unless you were going for some kind of choppy effect, I thought your sentences were too short. You also started too many with "She" or "He". You would have more of a flowing effect if you used more complex sentences, although that can be overdone also.

You also spelled "lightning" wrong and, yes, I know the difference between "lightning" and "lightening".

The important thing is though that the story was told well, set to music like that.

 

[cheeryorchid]

Thanks for the response, Boxlicker. I appreciate the time you put in to checking it out. Thanks for the advice. I'll keep that in mind.
I usually write long overly long sentences so I cut them down. I was also a journalist, that adds to it.
Any more advice will always be greatly appreciated.