Thoughts About Prose Flow

[holliday1960]

Holliday, you are having far too much fun, girl.

Thank you, Sammy...nice of you to notice. I really should have been born a cat...
You got any catnip in that pouch, baby? You know how crazy it makes me.

 

[holliday1960]

Honestly, this thread is garbage. The only reason I'm here it to say is that I've always liked cheerleaders.

Now I'll go wash up to rinse off the garbage scent. You'd think it was mid-summer or something. The flies... The flies...

Thank you, NW...such a gentleman as always. Just for that...I'll jump up and down and shake my pom-poms for you.

 

[holliday1960]

No.

You contribute conversation, but after that; nothing.

I said sorry because insulting you was not my intend.

Contributions? My charitable nature only goes so far and it is reserved for a select few. I'm not here to feed the world. Your attempt at being apologetic is unwarranted. People like me are the reason the penal system is a complete failure in this country. A lack of give a fuck makes us immune.

I did say PENAL...not penis...the penis system worked just fine the last time I checked...which is why I dont have to fuck myself. Rah, Rah, Sis boom Bah!

 

[TxRad]

TXRad ... who the fuck cares (notice how the guys who do their 'mainstream' shit don't mention it by name) I'd like to read one of these mainstream books.

If you don't understand why it is not mentioned here then you know absolutely nothing about mainstream publishing.

 

[NOIRTRASH]

Note. Texican Barfly's name is pronounced BARF-LY not BAR-FLY.

 

[ChloeTzang]

Fuck myself? Entirely unnecessary, although it has been suggested a few times before. I am a cheerleader of every name you listed and a few others. Let us throw them in there too...James, NW, HD, JN, sorry if I missed anyone...Now you take back that cheerleader remark, right now! See? making demands is kinda funny when you consider where it gets you.

Apology accepted

I kind of missed JacksonCreep and this one and just caught up. You were all here having fun and nobody told me. Seems Jackson is taking the heat of Susan. Very entertaining.

 

[NOIRTRASH]

Someone inverted a Bach score (upside down and backwards) to demonstrate the music can be performed all kinds of ways because it has a symmetry that makes it possible. To my ears one way isn't as good as another tho the inversion isn't awful. Plenty of music sounds bad played straight.

Lemme see if I can find a vid of a song sung backwards.

 

[holliday1960]

Apology accepted

I kind of missed JacksonCreep and this one and just caught up. You were all here having fun and nobody told me. Seems Jackson is taking the heat of Susan. Very entertaining.

Aw, Chloe, it aint nuthin' but a thang. You didnt miss much. Besides, I figured you'd ketchup sooner or later. I just kinda take it personal when someone starts talking trash...(Sorry Noir) about people they dont even know. Especially when those people are my friends.

I figured you'd show up sooner or later. I just hate James' thread got hijacked for this bullshit. People were enjoying it until then.

Again, Sorry James. I'll bow out now. I've had my say. So carry on because people were listening...And, hey, I hear if you play the Beatle's white album backwards you can hear all kinds of interesting things...if you're in the right state of mind.

 

[NOIRTRASH]

Aw, Chloe, it aint nuthin' but a thang. You didnt miss much. Besides, I figured you'd ketchup sooner or later. I just kinda take it personal when someone starts talking trash...(Sorry Noir) about people they dont even know. Especially when those people are my friends.

I figured you'd show up sooner or later. I just hate James' thread got hijacked for this bullshit. People were enjoying it until then.

Again, Sorry James. I'll bow out now. I've had my say. So carry on because people were listening...And, hey, I hear if you play the Beatle's white album backwards you can hear all kinds of interesting things...if you're in the right state of mind.

I've learned that most AH posters cant be less interested in exploring writing arts and sciences. When the thread rises above insults and whining and bullshit the usual suspects cant resist shitting on it. Scouries has done it for years, and is back with an alt. The Texican stops by to fart.

Laurel is only interested in pampering snowflakes.

The AH is what it is.

 

[NOIRTRASH]

A USEFUL VID ABOUT FLUID WRITING.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhSmnG6w_6Q

 

[Kimikimidoll]

I've learned that most AH posters cant be less interested in exploring writing arts and sciences. When the thread rises above insults and whining and bullshit the usual suspects cant resist shitting on it. Scouries has done it for years, and is back with an alt. The Texican stops by to fart.

Laurel is only interested in pampering snowflakes.

The AH is what it is.

Oh em geee NoirTrash actually made a post that doesn't sound like NoirTrash. Are you feeling alright?
Aside from that, you're absolutely right. (The world is gonna end now, damnit)

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RENk9PK06AQ
Also, here is a piece of music that is called 'the ugliest piece of music ever' because it doesn't follow any discernible pattern. Our ears like 'symmetrical' and repeatable notes, and that is what is said to separate 'music' from 'noise'.

 

[JacksonLow]

...............

 

[TxRad]

I know why you don't. What I want to know is why you continue to mention it without mentioning it.

Call it incentive.

 

[JacksonLow]

............

 

[Desiremakesmeweak]

The guy who really turned me on to this idea was John Mortimer - who, believe it or not, once wrote an AMAZING play for television (I think it was in ITV's Beyond The Green Door series) called 'Married Twice.'

Now this television play is - as far as I'm aware - totally lost to the world, at least it is for the present.

It starred of all people Robert Culp and DIANA RIGG!!

And it was A-MAZING.

Firstly, Culp was stunning as an American 'husband' thought at first to have been dead, lost, or runaway, or who had lost his memory, who then suddenly turned back up on the doorstep of his in theory at least, 'wife' - with some memory problems.

Rigg began to really show strong style and ability as a genuine serious stage dramatic actress and performer.

And the whole thing has this backdrop of a simple solo piano playing one of the Chopin Polonaise's.

The drama, the riskiness of the human reactions to the situation, the way Rigg's character went through various options of what to do, whether or not to tell everyone in her aristocratic circle that she could confirm it really WAS her husband... (Basically people wanted to know if she had fucked him yet after his return). It was absolutely brilliant. A genuine masterpiece. The music, the dialogue, the drama - it all worked like a Swiss watch.

There are a handful of people who rue the fact that there was no one in ITV or BBC with the brains to keep lots of copies of this television short film.

...Only a handful.

The short movie sent me to the main city music library in a vain attempt literally over many years to locate the actual polonaise in question; and I never did locate the ACTUAL recording itself because APPARENTLY, some studio musician played it live for the tv play!!!

 

[NOIRTRASH]

The guy who really turned me on to this idea was John Mortimer - who, believe it or not, once wrote an AMAZING play for television (I think it was in ITV's Beyond The Green Door series) called 'Married Twice.'

Now this television play is - as far as I'm aware - totally lost to the world, at least it is for the present.

It starred of all people Robert Culp and DIANA RIGG!!

And it was A-MAZING.

Firstly, Culp was stunning as an American 'husband' thought at first to have been dead, lost, or runaway, or who had lost his memory, who then suddenly turned back up on the doorstep of his in theory at least, 'wife' - with some memory problems.

Rigg began to really show strong style and ability as a genuine serious stage dramatic actress and performer.

And the whole thing has this backdrop of a simple solo piano playing one of the Chopin Polonaise's.

The drama, the riskiness of the human reactions to the situation, the way Rigg's character went through various options of what to do, whether or not to tell everyone in her aristocratic circle that she could confirm it really WAS her husband... (Basically people wanted to know if she had fucked him yet after his return). It was absolutely brilliant. A genuine masterpiece. The music, the dialogue, the drama - it all worked like a Swiss watch.

There are a handful of people who rue the fact that there was no one in ITV or BBC with the brains to keep lots of copies of this television short film.

...Only a handful.

The short movie sent me to the main city music library in a vain attempt literally over many years to locate the actual polonaise in question; and I never did locate the ACTUAL recording itself because APPARENTLY, some studio musician played it live for the tv play!!!

Speech and music get heard pretty much alike, so I assume music/speech follow the same rules. The printed word isn't sound but plenty of musicians read scores and hear the music, similar to what readers do with print. The transformation process is maybe identical. I keep thin king there ought to be lessons for writers to learn from music composers.

 

[SecondCircle]

It's a good point I think. Often when I write lyrics, I listen to what we've written in the song and ask, "What does this song sounds like? What is it saying?" And often just the mood and the sounds of the instruments are telling a story. Almost like a soundtrack or a cinematic score.

So I agree they are relative in some ways. More often than not it's a song that inspires a story for me anyway, and not simply the lyrics, but the actual arrangements. What I picture in my head is happening in THIS portion of the song when it speeds up or that PART when it fades to a crawl.

 

[ElectricBlue]

from Lovecraft: (HP)
Revise the entire text, paying attention to vocabulary, syntax, rhythm of prose, proportioning of parts, niceties of tone, grace and convincingness or transitions (scene to scene, slow and detailed action to rapid and sketchy time-covering action and vice versa. . . . etc., etc., etc.), effectiveness of beginning, ending, climaxes, etc., dramatic suspense and interest, plausibility and atmosphere, and various other elements.

---
you know who doesn't follow this rule on here?

Chloe ... she can write a sex scene, but she writes like she talks. fucking diary, 10,000 shitty words a day isn't an accomplishment. It's 10,000 shit words. You can make a man come, but no one is reading all that stuff in between sex scenes.

Electricblue (I'm sure he will like reading his name) reads better, but maybe he is a one hit wonder with his gal in the chair story.
...

there is more people on this forum who shit gold but never take their own advice. Writing is easy, but working on your writing is hard, and most people don't like to work.
----

I'm going to take that as a compliment, even if it is back-handed and suspiciously sounding like someone's alt - I've been interstate a week in a "pay for your wi-fi" zone (fuck that) and I come back to AH and find James is a liberal and the Jackson Five turned up from somewhere, and I'm thinking did I just step into the Twilight Zone?

The HP Lovecraft advice only applies if you want to craft a perfect story, but I don't want to polish a turd. If I scrubbed and scrubbed and reworked as he suggests, my stories, such as they are, would die in a ditch. They are nearly all stream-of-consciousness writing, 500-600 words at a time, with minimal edit and rework. It's the rawness that works, not rework. If the mood isn't caught in the first drop of words, it's not going to be there, ever.

I find myself writing to some kind of a beat (picking up on an earlier observation) which seems to work for some readers (a favourite comment: "my reaction was...considerable!") and probably turns others right off. But when I get similar comments from different readers on different stories, that tells me I have a consistent style ("poetic", "story telling by a fire", "pipe and slippers and a smooth whiskey"), so I'm happy with that. My writing is pure self indulgence, so if I get a cadre of loyal readers who indulge me, what more can I ask for?

 

[holliday1960]

I'm going to take that as a compliment, even if it is back-handed and suspiciously sounding like someone's alt - I've been interstate a week in a "pay for your wi-fi" zone (fuck that) and I come back to AH and find James is a liberal and the Jackson Five turned up from somewhere, and I'm thinking did I just step into the Twilight Zone?

EB...damn it! Don't you DARE call James a liberal! James, being the man he is, simply indulges people like me...probably because I'm a girl and don't know any better...but, still, YOU TAKE IT BACK, RIGHT NOW!

See? Girls are really good at making demands. The results are highly questionable. Further more...I didn't know you liked reading your name so much...you never told me that.

But, just in case Jackson is right about that...here you go: ElectricBlue69...EB69...EB...eb...eB...69? (Oops...typo...or is it a freudian slip? Did Freud wear slips? That crazy mf...can't put anything past him.) Now, go read your name and stop picking on James. And, don't forget to practice that rhythm method. We should all practice Safe Writing and all that jazz.

 

[ElectricBlue]

But, just in case Jackson is right about that...here you go: ElectricBlue69...EB69...EB...eb...eB...69? (Oops...typo...or is it a freudian slip? Did Freud wear slips? That crazy mf...can't put anything past him.) Now, go read your name and stop picking on James. And, don't forget to practice that rhythm method. We should all practice Safe Writing and all that jazz.

Get them meds balanced, gal, before you do yourself an injury!

Truth to tell, the 66 isn't the highway, isn't the year I was born, isn't my age, isn't a Freudian slip. It's actually a leftover from another forum where I first used the moniker "electricblue", in a completely different context. Dual Triode (a regular denizen of "I'm Listening To") is probably the only person here who might have a clue where it comes from, but he's a Yank, so might not. Handley Page might, thinking about it, coz he's an ageing Brit.

 

[holliday1960]

Get them meds balanced, gal, before you do yourself an injury!

Truth to tell, the 66 isn't the highway, isn't the year I was born, isn't my age, isn't a Freudian slip. It's actually a leftover from another forum where I first used the moniker "electricblue", in a completely different context. Dual Triode (a regular denizen of "I'm Listening To") is probably the only person here who might have a clue where it comes from, but he's a Yank, so might not. Handley Page might, thinking about it, coz he's an ageing Brit.

Aw, just having some fun EB. Everyone is so serious on the AH these days. Life is too short not to laugh a little. Yeah, yeah...I know about the name. Hope your trip was somewhat enjoyable anyway.

 

[Boxlicker101]

My mistake ... I'll look you up then.

Do you think posting stories elevates you in some way?

I certainly think it does. It elevates a prolific writer over somebody like you who has little or nothing posted here, and may have never written much of anything anywhere else.

 

[ChloeTzang]

I certainly think it does. It elevates a prolific writer over somebody like you who has little or nothing posted here, and may have never written much of anything anywhere else.

Ohhhh, Jackson was baving fun. The way I look at it is ten thousand shit words is a lot better than zero thousand shit words. And my objective is as stated. I want my readers getting off on my stories and that seems to be workinh. Lol.so I'm all good.

 

[NOIRTRASH]

A conservative usta be a person who did what worked, and a liberal did something different when the old ways didn't work. Today theyre opposing sides of the same agenda that aims to steal what you have and force you to be a slave. All political systems aim to rob and subjugate working stiffs.

I'm a fascist.

Your basic fascist thinks, DO WHAT YOU WANT AT HOME BUT THE STREETS BELONG TO ME. MOBS SUCK, AND DEMOCRACY IS MOB RULE.

 

[NOIRTRASH]

Looks like dew are interested in how prose flows. Its the nature of LIT. The average poster is an attention whore with nothing to contribute beyond noise.