Things that annoy me

[Vincent E]

Ah - contradiction, and my favorite line, I like to quote myself - I AM never beyond contradiction

And neither are you

I will take that as a compliment, since it is late, I am tired, I posted a long explanation of the American democratic process on Svenskaflicka's thread, and I am not very bright to begin with despite my new AV.

 

[minsue]

Perhaps I’m a bit over sensitive to the issue being surrounded by people who admit that they are “Ten Years” (More like twenty or thirty) behind the rest of the world. People who think that “Life would be much easier if * * (Insert ANY minority) would just know and stay in their place.” And I should just let it be. But this is a thread for “Things that annoy me”, this annoys me.

No, you should absolutely not let it be. One of the reasons that this sort of crap persists is because of all of the people who just let 'John be John' (insert name of whatever particular asshole said it most recently) because it's easier that way. I've been guilty of that a million times myself.

I hadn't realized the extent of it until a family member commented a while back how proud they were of me as a child because I would always interrupt my grandfather during his racist tirades to tell him how wrong he was and that it was not ok to talk that way. It wasn't until then that I thought back on the person I used to be when I was too young to keep my mouth shut for the sake of peace. I'm still trying to find my way back to being that person and one of the reasons it's so difficult is that it's far more socially acceptable to shrug it off.

Please don't let it go just to be polite and to keep from starting arguments or making people feel embarrassed. Anyone who makes statements, apparantly thinking they're being complimentary, that 'you're not like a normal black guy' should be embarrassed. If you or anyone else lets them get away with statements like that, it's a tacit agreement. I, for one, cannot sit by silently anymore.

- Mindy

 

[SlickTony]

Are there any stories with guys who have small dicks? Seems a given in almost all porn that the guy has to have a big one.

I'm not sure what's meant by small. All the guys in my stories have statistically normal ones.

 

[CharleyH]

I know that this might start a bottle throwing car burning riot but I HAVE to get this off of my chest.

I recently moved, now I live in a small, homogonous, town. And I have had people say to me on more than one occasion. “You’re not like a “Normal” black guy”…. And this is only said because I don’t use Ebonics in common social conversations, ware my pants below my waist, (Unless they fall there!) and believe the lyrics of rap music. (NO ONE WITH HALF A BRAIN BELIEVES THAT!).

I recently began to read the interracial themed stories on the site and I was … well shocked! Once again I see blacks portrayed not as normal members of the community. But as extras from rap videos!

I know the view seems to be pervasive in pop culture that we are some kind of lurking monsters with a culture of avarice and opposition. Either that or back slapping Amos and Andy like jokesters, who “Shine” for the camera and have hip snappy comebacks for every thing. Or as some “Oreo” who is ashamed of who and what he is and tries to be “White” in some vain attempt to “Pass”

But in a community of people, who by the mere admission of being a part of said community, see the individualism inherent in people. To See people of color are seen as bucks is a bit disheartening. Thou I guess not unexpected.

Perhaps I’m a bit over sensitive to the issue being surrounded by people who admit that they are “Ten Years” (More like twenty or thirty) behind the rest of the world. People who think that “Life would be much easier if * * (Insert ANY minority) would just know and stay in their place.” And I should just let it be. But this is a thread for “Things that annoy me”, this annoys me.

All done now so I guess I will just go back to the corner and drink my “Forty” and make crass remarks to all the women that walk by.

Well - culture . . . homogenized western culture . . . hmm . . . you didn't say your context. Have you ever thought that some writers of the so said just might be black? Or just might have experienced sex with a sterotype? I have - not often, but have, and well I COULD go on about what each of us enjoys in our experience.

We live in a world that is unfortunately skewed on the basis of otherness - and THIS crosses many boundires. I write about people, in all their beauty, no matter what colour, religion, sex . . . if they are powerful I write, if they are weak, I write, if they can't get a grip, I write . . . and well things have a symbolism.

We all see differently, we all experience differently . . . we all are individual, and well. why not write about it? Why not push boundries? and quite frankly, sterotypes? Which does in essence push boundries, and change the world. If we all stayed in the box then, really what changes in culture? Outkast performance - well why the fuck not? WE are too politcally correct, and when we get BEYOND it - well . . .

Why cave to political correctness? Why get upset about ignorance? About reality? I'm not exactly a 'normal' lesbian, but I do get the comment about not being one - lol - from my own group, from others. Do I care? LOL -why should I? I'm strong enought to go beyond it and much more powerful than to give a fuck -

I laugh, and say, "well and you are a typical herterosexual," and I smile sarcastic.

Who has the power to change things? You do, and so do others. To change the 'norm' you put the norm in the face of the norm, and fuck them around.

Who defined norm? - which, by the way is pretty fucked up, wouldn't you say?

Anyhow this is a dissertation but not a post . . . ignore me

 

[Guest]

I'm not exactly a 'normal' lesbian, but I do get the comment about not being one - lol - from my own group, from others. Do I care? LOL -why should I? I'm strong enought to go beyond it and much more powerful than to give a fuck -

Anyhow this is a dissertation but not a post . . . ignore me

Ignore you, Charlie? Never. My dyke friends, who happen to be academics (English and Chemistry), say similar things about how "their group" judges them. They don't "look like" dykes much and in SF the various "others" do get into clique mode, and of course present walking/talking stereotypes.

Be yourself, that's who I adore.

Perdita

 

[grumpymann]

Well - culture . . . homogenized western culture . . . hmm . . . you didn't say your context. Have you ever thought that some writers of the so said just might be black? Or just might have experienced sex with a sterotype? I have - not often, but have, and well I COULD go on about what each of us enjoys in our experience.

We live in a world that is unfortunately skewed on the basis of otherness - and THIS crosses many boundires. I write about people, in all their beauty, no matter what colour, religion, sex . . . if they are powerful I write, if they are weak, I write, if they can't get a grip, I write . . . and well things have a symbolism.

We all see differently, we all experience differently . . . we all are individual, and well. why not write about it? Why not push boundries? and quite frankly, sterotypes? Which does in essence push boundries, and change the world. If we all stayed in the box then, really what changes in culture? Outkast performance - well why the fuck not? WE are too politcally correct, and when we get BEYOND it - well . . .

Why cave to political correctness? Why get upset about ignorance? About reality? I'm not exactly a 'normal' lesbian, but I do get the comment about not being one - lol - from my own group, from others. Do I care? LOL -why should I? I'm strong enought to go beyond it and much more powerful than to give a fuck -

I laugh, and say, "well and you are a typical herterosexual," and I smile sarcastic.

Who has the power to change things? You do, and so do others. To change the 'norm' you put the norm in the face of the norm, and fuck them around.

Who defined norm? - which, by the way is pretty fucked up, wouldn't you say?

Anyhow this is a dissertation but not a post . . . ignore me

Point One: I didn’t say “Western” culture because I didn’t mean western culture. I was brought up in a way that opened my eyes to the difference in people and cultures to me. And I will admit I LOVE it. The people that live in this little valley have their own culture; it is separate from western, north-eastern U.S., hell even The U.S. in general. That isn’t a bad thing in and of it’s self. But to sideline and out right attack ANY devotion from “Their” norm is.

Point Two: As I have said before I’m not calling writers (Or anyone I don’t know for that matter) a raciest. If that is how the situations of your story present them selves then so be it. What I meant and believe I stated was that I found it “disheartening”

Point Three: I don’t think Stereotypes are “Out of the box” in fact I think of them as being smack in the middle of the box, if not the stuff the box it’s self is made of. I don’t think of harassment, malfeasance, marginalization and active ignoring as “Political Correctness”

Point Four: I’m sure that you being a lesbian you have faced many of the same obstacles that I have being a black man in the U.S. but one thing you PROBABLY haven’t faced. That is the obvious “Otherness” I do here. When I walk down the street, drive a car, stand in line, eat my food, sleep or just sit on the john it is imposable to “pass” it is as plain as the look on my face. In fact it is my face. That screams “HEY!!!! I’M A BLACK GUY!!!!!. And that is not a bad thing it is what I am. But when people hear that same statement as. “Hey, I’m here to rape your daughter. Steal your possessions. Destroy your religion and bring about the fall of civilization as you know it.” It CAN be a bad thing. I don’t know you so I can’t say weather you are “Masculine” or “Feminine” “Good” or “Bad”. I just doubt that you are met with the pervasiveness of ; harassing, malfeasant, rude, ignorant, arrogant and offensively ignoring treatment that I have here in this little valley.

Point Five: My problem with the “Normal” black guy comment is this. I AM a normal black guy. I lived in my home town on and off for over thirty years in all that time I have only known a few people who are, what is considered a “Normal black guy” here. What bothered me is not the “Stereotype” but the attempt to make ME the stereotype in the face of the facts. The biggest fact is that that stereotype is a LIE (for the most part). And that I AM the NORM. Though I must admit I am not “normal”.

Huff! All that said. I agree with some of what you said. I am me, and the views of what other people have little affect on that fact. It was not a melt down (Neither is this) or an attack on the writers, or members of Lit. It was a statement of one of the “Things that annoy me”. I will say it and say it loud I like the forum, the people and ideas I here are very stimulating and I LOVE mental stimulation. So incase I didn’t thank you (And reading back I can see that I didn’t) I thank you for your comments and if I read it right the sentiment.

P.S. I NEVER ignore insightful, spirited, conversation, comments or people!
P.S.S Thank you Mindy it dose my heart good to hear you say something like that!

 

[grumpymann]

P.P.S. YES the view of what is the norm is FUCKED UP!!!

 

[rgraham666]

Unfortunately, the attitude of far too many people is "Blessed be the Norm".

By prejudging, they alleviate themselves of the burden and responsibility of thought.