Things/kinks/fetishes that are hot in erotica/porn less so in real life.

[TheRedChamber]

We had a thread derail recently about whether 69s were actually that great in reality. Similarly it's probably fair to say that erotic fiction/porn doesn't always show the 'downsides' to anal sex.

So what things/kinks/fetishes (call them what you may) do you love to write about but which don't always measure up in real life?
I'll start off with a tame example inspired by the fact that I'm currently spending a lot of time in hospitals as a deeply caring but also slightly bored visitor. I have to say female nurses/doctors are not doing it for me to the extent that I've been promised by blue media.

Nothing against the ladies themselves, it's just that there isn't one of them who wouldn't look sexier in their Friday night party gear. It maybe regional, but white trousers, white top and hair tied up is a deeply sensible and practical getup which shows no figure. Almost as if their outfits designed for the job they're doing rather than looking good... The face masks aren't helping much either. At the moments the patients are out hotting the staff (that will be dependent on which ward you're on obviously)

So, am I going to avoid writing hospital shenanigans in the future? Hell no, it has huge dramatic and erotic potential with just the smallest tweaking of reality. In a week I'll have forgotten this vague sense of disappointment.

Now, I'm off to write the story of the masocist whose wife is a dentist...

 

[ElectricBlue]

After I had an angiogram one time, a nurse had to press her thumb really hard onto my femoral artery for an hour, to stop the bleeding. The girl who did it was a netball player, because of her strong hands. There's a certain je ne sais quoi, carrying on a conversation with a very tall, very fit looking nurse, with her thumb an inch away from my balls. The sparkle in her eyes said she'd done it before. I have no idea what we talked about...

 

[TheRedChamber]

After I had an angiogram one time, a nurse had to press her thumb really hard onto my femoral artery for an hour, to stop the bleeding. The girl who did it was a netball player, because of her strong hands. There's a certain je ne sais quoi, carrying on a conversation with a very tall, very fit looking nurse, with her thumb an inch away from my balls. The sparkle in her eyes said she'd done it before. I have no idea what we talked about...

Maybe it's not about the nurse, maybe it's about the treatment...

 

[BarracudaSwordfish]

I had a colonscopy a while ago that was administered by a very striking 40ish lady and a rather cute nurse. Some of it was unpleasant but there were certain elements of it that I somehow found quite erotic. It got me to thinking what it would be like to be tied down and the two women do unspeakable things to me. I have tried writing it up in a story but haven't quite got it right yet.

The one thing I know for sure is that I will fantasise about it until then cows come home, but if I was offered such an opportunity, I would probably run away faster than Usain Bolt.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Remember me?

DPs. As per:

https://forum.literotica.com/thread...to-think-are-sexy-that-really-aren’t.1582065/

Em

 

[TheRedChamber]

Remember me?

DPs. As per:

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/things-that-we-are-conditioned-to-think-are-sexy-that-really-aren’t.1582065/

Em

This had me confused as I remember you discussing DP and 69s and even posting myself about it but didn't remember this thread (unlikely given that striking aide du memoir gif that crops up several dozen times) and was going to shrug it off with a 'well, you create a heck of a lot of threads' but then saw it was in Fetish - into which I rarely venture.

Seems like people are going to use this thread to post sexy nurse encounters and, while I don't like being wrong, I'd be okay with that.

 

[HordHolm]

As with nurses, so with airline cabin crew - their uniforms look the opposite of alluring. More like static electricity generators akin to rubbing a balloon over oneself, and bored? Hell they look so bored. But why wouldn't you look bored when, rather than the glamour the stereotype promises, the job actually involves trying to flog perfume to drunks and dishing out tea and coffee to grumpy passengers who've paid through the nose just to have the luxury of putting a bag in the overhead locker? First Class might be different, but I suspect only to a degree, and the chances of encountering the entitled rises exponentially as one progress through the cabin up towards the cockpit.

 

[TheRedChamber]

As with nurses, so with airline cabin crew - their uniforms look the opposite of alluring.

Looking through my ideas folder my Air-hostesses have more fun off-duty laid (over) in a strange and exotic city than in the mile high club.

 

[MrPixel]

Looking through my ideas folder my Air-hostesses have more fun off-duty laid (over) in a strange and exotic city than in the mile high club.

As somebody who dated flight attendants for a few years, I can confirm this. In the air was work; on the ground was fun... when they weren't on the phone trying to move their schedules around. They spent a lot of time on the phone.

I would guess they do that online and probably on their smartphones now. Gosh. 40 years ago. How time flies.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

If I can anonymise it sufficiently, at some point I need to write the story of How the NHS Gave me a Medical Fetish.

I swear they've been trolling me for years. Did you know you can get thigh cuffs and other bondage gear in NHS blue and there are times when they will strap a patient down and beat their arse?

Not to mention the recent gynae appt where the gorgeous huge gynaecologist had huge warm fingers, each thumb the size of a cock. Remarkably difficult to stay professional as a patient, especially with the very cute punk chaperone fluttering at my side...

I have a ridiculous number of stories which are practically medical porn, even without tweaking the staff to make them unprofessional...

 

[Trionyx]

Spontaneous outdoor sex (no blanket or towel). The grass tickles, there’s a small stick under your butt, ants and ticks bite. Yeah, sex in the grass is overrated.

 

[alohadave]

Pine needles on your sack

Sand in...places.

 

[onehitwanda]

Spontaneous outdoor sex (no blanket or towel). The grass tickles, there’s a small stick under your butt, ants and ticks bite. Yeah, sex in the grass is overrated.

This is why those of us who are experienced in these matters always choose a handy tree or log to... er... brace against.

 

[NoTalentHack]

Anything with, like, a lot of setup. I'm thinking of extensive bondage as an example. It's hot, yeah, but unless you're REALLY into it, the ROI for time invested is vastly diminished after the first time you do some of that stuff.

 

[alohadave]

Anything with, like, a lot of setup. I'm thinking of extensive bondage as an example. It's hot, yeah, but unless you're REALLY into it, the ROI for time invested is vastly diminished after the first time you do some of that stuff.

That's sex with infrastructure.

 

[lc69hunter]

chastity cages

 

[MrPixel]

Spontaneous outdoor sex (no blanket or towel). The grass tickles, there’s a small stick under your butt, ants and ticks bite. Yeah, sex in the grass is overrated.

Pine needles on your sack

Tick on your sack.

 

[gunhilltrain]

After I had an angiogram one time, a nurse had to press her thumb really hard onto my femoral artery for an hour, to stop the bleeding. The girl who did it was a netball player, because of her strong hands. There's a certain je ne sais quoi, carrying on a conversation with a very tall, very fit looking nurse, with her thumb an inch away from my balls. The sparkle in her eyes said she'd done it before. I have no idea what we talked about...

I had an angiogram once - that's where a tube is put through an artery to examine the heart, correct? There was a male attendant there who kept reminding me not to move, but no one pressed on my groin. In any case, I was more worried about the the heart surgery that I knew was probably on the way (I was right) than anything else.

I've never had the medical / nurse kink. Hospitals and such are the least sexy places I can imagine. TheRedChamber: you must be tongue-in-cheek about the female dentist. Even masochists don't want things done to their teeth.

 

[alohadave]

Tick on your sack.

I've actually had that. From my back yard of all places. All the times hiking out in the woods and I get one in my back yard.

I found it randomly hours later.

It was a nervous week or two looking out for symptoms of Lyme.

 

[MrPixel]

It was a nervous week or two looking out for symptoms of Lyme.

Heh. I acquired Alpha-gal syndrome from a bite, peculiar to the lone star tick. Makes you allergic to red meats. Poultry and fish, no problem.

 

[AlinaX]

chastity cages

I'm intrigued. The only person I know who tried one said he couldn't get it to stay on, which rather defeated the purpose.

 

[Tayloroc]

I had a colonscopy a while ago that was administered by a very striking 40ish lady and a rather cute nurse. Some of it was unpleasant but there were certain elements of it that I somehow found quite erotic. It got me to thinking what it would be like to be tied down and the two women do unspeakable things to me. I have tried writing it up in a story but haven't quite got it right yet.

The one thing I know for sure is that I will fantasise about it until then cows come home, but if I was offered such an opportunity, I would probably run away faster than Usain Bolt.

Lol! Well said!

 

[MrPixel]

Speaking of medical fetishes... you guys made me realize I write a lot about medical stuff in my big story. A FMC nearly dies, MMC breaks a leg, MMC has a myocardial infarction, MMC and another FMC... well... that would spoil the ending. They're all derived from IRL experience and not at all fetishized, just making for different and interesting plot twists and fun/funny character interaction.

Okay, caught me. I gotta admit there were and are a couple of scenes with sex in the hospital room. They're just opportunities for a bit of naughty nookie.

 

[KeithD]

Erotica is all about achieving arousal. It's natural that, in pursuit of invoking arousal, all acts/techniques will be shown in more favorable and pleasurable light in writing than actually experienced with them in real life.

 

[Trionyx]

Tick on your sack.

In this case, would Lyme disease be considered an STD? You would have gotten the disease during sex, after all.