There are better things to do with your mouth

[Moon Dragon]

... than babble like an idiot during sex. Dirty talk makes me angry, disturbs me, or makes me question his IQ.

"Spank me mommy!"
Whoa! I am not your mother and I don't even want to know where that thought came from.

"Oh yeah baby, do you like my big cock in your tight pussy?"
Well duh, if I didn't you wouldn't be getting any play would you?

"Oh you dirty slut fucking me with your face!"
Ok bub now you are pissing me off!

Even something as simple as, "You like that don't you?"
Can't you tell by my moaning or screaming or the way my nails are digging into your flesh? I'm not a big fan of stating the obvious or lying, whatever the case may be.

This kind of stuff really spoils the mood for me. But certain things are nice, like if he says, "Oh god!" which is sometimes followed by, "Slow down!" while gritting his teeth trying to hold in his load or a heartfelt, "God you are beautiful," when he sees me for the first time ... "Wow!" is always good too. Instructional things like, "Turn over," are good also, although I would sometimes prefer he just made me turn over. But mostly I prefer to enjoy the sounds of our gasping, our heavy breathing, moans and groans, sighs and all the things that he/I can't help but say because the noise is ripped out of his/my throat by sensation.

How about you?

 

[TK70]

I have to agree Moon...

Communication is absolutely necessary to heighten the mutual pleasure, but the rhetorical questions and generic use of foul language for no reason do nothing for me. Now, the moaning, sighing, instructional communication is great. I also love the urgent whisper in my ear to "let's go somewhere more private"....or "I want you so bad" as part of the foreplay.

Having my partner urgently pant "faster, harder, oh ...." etc. I consider a real turn-on.....but hearing her say, for instance "c'mon baby, pound my pussy like a drum"...well that would be overkill and just not very 'mood-enhancing'.

Honestly, what you might say while riding me might not enhance the mood, it probably won't turn me off to the point of going limp....get my drift???

TK

 

[fathom7]

{{{{{Moon Dragon}}}}}

Nice post and question. Hope you have folks willing enough to truly share.

Here's ONE guy's perspective:

The sounds a woman makes (my sexual preference) are among the most exciting aspects of the event. Not the words truly -- but the conveyance of the passion and release she is experiencing. Contrived language inserted for effect is a turn off. Muttering as though "speaking in tongues" works ONLY IF the noises, words, utterances whatever are believable. The point of erotic play is to pleasure. Acting as though pleased only serves two evil masters: Ego (and in many cases the damnable MALE ego) and avoidance. If you have to act, say things that you believe will entice or spur your partner into BETTER action -- save your breath. Instead use that breath at some more convenient time (or even immediately if the case warrants) to communicate with your partner what it is that is going well or not so well during your intercourse. Intercourse on intercourse I like to call it.

Then, if the communication is well-done -- the next time the sounds that come out -- whether or not it is in the form of intelligible language -- can well be felt as an indication of the passion that is involved. I try to insure that whoever my partner is they receive as much as possible. In order to assess this while involved -- I listen -- to the vocalizations -- to the tactile feedback and a host of other clues. I also have a tuned ear that can detect the artificial. For that I have little patience. It just works out so much better the other way.

Hoping this wasn't too serious an answer to what I read as a serious question. but there you have it.

 

[babydoll2u]

... than babble like an idiot during sex. Dirty talk makes me angry, disturbs me, or makes me question his IQ.

"Spank me mommy!"
Whoa! I am not your mother and I don't even want to know where that thought came from.

"Oh yeah baby, do you like my big cock in your tight pussy?"
Well duh, if I didn't you wouldn't be getting any play would you?

"Oh you dirty slut fucking me with your face!"
Ok bub now you are pissing me off!

Even something as simple as, "You like that don't you?"
Can't you tell by my moaning or screaming or the way my nails are digging into your flesh? I'm not a big fan of stating the obvious or lying, whatever the case may be.

This kind of stuff really spoils the mood for me. But certain things are nice, like if he says, "Oh god!" which is sometimes followed by, "Slow down!" while gritting his teeth trying to hold in his load or a heartfelt, "God you are beautiful," when he sees me for the first time ... "Wow!" is always good too. Instructional things like, "Turn over," are good also, although I would sometimes prefer he just made me turn over. But mostly I prefer to enjoy the sounds of our gasping, our heavy breathing, moans and groans, sighs and all the things that he/I can't help but say because the noise is ripped out of his/my throat by sensation.

How about you?

Hi Moon...
hunny I could not agree with you more!
Little sweet words, hot words, sexy words.. like suck me baby, or "oh yeah, right there, just like that"... are good.. real good. But save the conversation for later! Like you, I'm turned off by the dirty talking as well.

I'd much rather him spend his energy touching me, tasting me, exploring me, and letting me do the same to him. I love to hear him moan and gasp, tangle his fingers in my hair and guide me to where he wants me.

whew... good topic! I'm sure I'll have more thoughts on this later.... when I can think again clearly

 

[BedtimeStories]

How about you?

I personally love "dirty talk" during sex. I don't see it as "babbling like an idiot". It can be a huge turn on and quite stimulating!

 

[LustfulOne50]

The jury may be out on sex talk in bed,but I have had the one woman(sex only partner) in bed making love to her when I got a phone call from another woman(sex only partner) wanting phone sex. I did everything I was saying on the phone to the one in bed at the time. When all was said and done I asked the one in bed just how many times she cum while I was on the phone ....she said 4 times...well both of them knew of each other..and shared me...nice to be wanted for something...LOL

I have had sex with a few women..and each are different in their own way...what makes them different lay between their ears...the great mystery to man..but that is why we love them.

 

[Moon Dragon]

Oh good, I was hoping for some serious replies.

Having my partner urgently pant "faster, harder, oh ...." etc. I consider a real turn-on.....but hearing her say, for instance "c'mon baby, pound my pussy like a drum"...well that would be overkill and just not very 'mood-enhancing'.

Honestly, what you might say while riding me might not enhance the mood, it probably won't turn me off to the point of going limp....get my drift???

Yes, I understand. I have been known to "urgently pant" things like that myself, but just reading "pound my pussy like a drum" made me laugh.

And thank you for this perspective ... I know that I have been turned off to the point of not wanting to continue if my partner says something too crude or flat out rude ... but then men often think of distasteful things to keep the game going so I suppose it wouldn't make you limp.

fathom7: Wow! Thank you for responding. I think you made my point much better than I did ... "the conveyance of the passion and release" and "what it is that is going well or not so well" ... yes, this is all that I want to hear too.

I listen -- to the vocalizations -- to the tactile feedback and a host of other clues. I also have a tuned ear that can detect the artificial. For that I have little patience.

This is something else I feel very strongly about. I want to be pleased. If I lie by faking it then I am not being fair to myself or my partner. The male ego craves the female release almost, (if not more in some cases,) than his own, (assuming we don't talk about a man who only cares about his own nut,) but if I am not honest with my responses then my lover will either be mislead and probably repeat certain things I could do without thinking that I enjoyed it or, (like you,) become upset with my deception. Either way, we both lose.

I love to hear him moan and gasp, tangle his fingers in my hair and guide me to where he wants me.

Oh me too! I love responsive men. I wish there were more of them. My excitement and pleasure increases exponentially if he is vocal. Why do some guys hold back every groan? Men complain if we aren't vocal ... don't they realize that we love to hear them too? This especially bothers me when I am going down on a man. There are so many different techniques at my disposal, but with the quiet ones there is no feedback! How am I to know what he likes better? It kinda takes the fun out of it if he leaves me guessing and where there is no fun there is little interest in my part.

I personally love "dirty talk" during sex. I don't see it as "babbling like an idiot". It can be a huge turn on and quite stimulating!

Don't be embarrassed! I'm sorry if I sounded condescending, but that is just what it is for me. We are all different and we all like different things. I'm glad you responded too. Maybe you can give me insight on the other side. Can I ask what is it about dirty talk that excites you? Do you do it yourself or does your partner? Or both?

The jury may be out on sex talk in bed, but I have had the one woman(sex only partner) in bed making love to her when I got a phone call from another woman(sex only partner) wanting phone sex. I did everything I was saying on the phone to the one in bed at the time. When all was said and done I asked the one in bed just how many times she cum while I was on the phone ....she said 4 times...well both of them knew of each other .. and shared me...nice to be wanted for something...LOL

I have had sex with a few women .. and each are different in their own way...what makes them different lay between their ears...the great mystery to man .. but that is why we love them.

I have never had phone sex for my sake. (Years ago, a stranger called me occasionally and either my roommate or me would take pity on him and help him get off.) I have always been curious about it and have wondered if I would enjoy it. I know I enjoy cybering, but only if my partner, (or I,) tell a story detailing what would be transpiring between us if we were together at that moment IRL. Sounds as if this is what you did for your friend on the phone that night. (I think I would have enjoyed being the woman in the bed too.) If it was like that, then I believe that phone sex would be better than cyber-sex because we could hear the inflections in each other's voices and there would be the added bonus of hearing real moans, etc.

And the same goes in reverse, my dear. It is the goodies in the "big head" that draw me to a man and make me consider him as a sex partner ... or for more. I'm not one to usually indulge in a fling so it is very important to me that his mind is as sexy, (if not more,) as his body. Whatever would we talk about when we weren't busy moaning and groaning if there was no mental connection?

 

[LustfulOne50]

Oh good, I was hoping for some serious replies.

I have never had phone sex for my sake. (Years ago, a stranger called me occasionally and either my roommate or me would take pity on him and help him get off.) I have always been curious about it and have wondered if I would enjoy it. I know I enjoy cybering, but only if my partner, (or I,) tell a story detailing what would be transpiring between us if we were together at that moment IRL. Sounds as if this is what you did for your friend on the phone that night. (I think I would have enjoyed being the woman in the bed too.) If it was like that, then I believe that phone sex would be better than cyber-sex because we could hear the inflections in each other's voices and there would be the added bonus of hearing real moans, etc.

And the same goes in reverse, my dear. It is the goodies in the "big head" that draw me to a man and make me consider him as a sex partner ... or for more. I'm not one to usually indulge in a fling so it is very important to me that his mind is as sexy, (if not more,) as his body. Whatever would we talk about when we weren't busy moaning and groaning if there was no mental connection?

Just a over sexed males, rantings...if it make scence I was lucky...LOL

Sex is of the moment and how torrent it shall get is within the brains of the two lovers. I, for myself enter it for the most part in wanting to pleasure who I am with and I would assume they are too. Having sex is intimate both physically and emotionally, but what adds to the favor of that special time are the feelings between the two involved. So, with that in mind it can be wild and ravaging, short yet very passionate or it may be long and pure sexual torture of the most pleasurable kind. Each moment of sex and all its wonderful pleasures is determine by many aspics the people involved, the place (maybe taboo which adds a thrill), time of the season, day or night and maybe even in the afternoon…which can such a delight, the sex talk…just thinking you can go on and on with this part…LOL. Me, I love sex and all its intimacies…I have cybered its ok and I have done phone sex..its ok too, but real sex just can’t be beat..and I love that wonderful hot cuddling afterglow as two folks seem to be more attuned to each other.in that moment.

 

[fathom7]

This is something else I feel very strongly about. I want to be pleased. If I lie by faking it then I am not being fair to myself or my partner. The male ego craves the female release almost, (if not more in some cases,) than his own, (assuming we don't talk about a man who only cares about his own nut,) but if I am not honest with my responses then my lover will either be mislead and probably repeat certain things I could do without thinking that I enjoyed it or, (like you,) become upset with my deception. Either way, we both lose.

Moon --

We seem to agree on this as well as most of the rest of it. the communication aspect of any physical relationship (even non-physical ones) is most important. My ego can take it. If I've not done something that would have enhanced the experience -- I want to know. Deception in the most private of circumstances is usuallly evidence of a far larger issue. The vocalizations, the honest ones, are evidence enough during the act, I believe, to identify what's really working. If you don't get them, then find a convenient time to discuss why you didn't.

This in no way excludes the spontaneous "dirty talk" that sometimes comes along. It should never be either a means nor an end in itself. Pleasure is wonderful thing and the parts that really work well are those that are the most honest.

FTR -- a woman's ultimate pleasure and release is ONE of the primary drivers in my physicality, but it too is neither an end nor a means unto itself. Done right both of us walk (or ideally stagger) away from the experience satiated. Not every time either. Over the course of a relationship (as opposed to a date or a one-nighter) there should be sufficient opportunity for each person to get a little selfish. Anyway -- that's another philosophical topic.

Thans again for the chance to post something requiring thought.

 

[Moon Dragon]

Just a over sexed males, rantings...if it make scence I was lucky...LOL

Sex is of the moment and how torrent it shall get is within the brains of the two lovers. I, for myself enter it for the most part in wanting to pleasure who I am with and I would assume they are too. Having sex is intimate both physically and emotionally, but what adds to the favor of that special time are the feelings between the two involved. So, with that in mind it can be wild and ravaging, short yet very passionate or it may be long and pure sexual torture of the most pleasurable kind. Each moment of sex and all its wonderful pleasures is determine by many aspics the people involved, the place (maybe taboo which adds a thrill), time of the season, day or night and maybe even in the afternoon…which can such a delight, the sex talk…just thinking you can go on and on with this part…LOL. Me, I love sex and all its intimacies…I have cybered its ok and I have done phone sex..its ok too, but real sex just can’t be beat..and I love that wonderful hot cuddling afterglow as two folks seem to be more attuned to each other.in that moment.

I couldn't agree more. Sex is a wonderful expression of the moment between two people and as each moment in life is different so is each sexual encounter.

And one of the best feelings in the world is the contented peace that is felt after you have made love to a wonderful person ... for a moment in time your bodies become one and that connection to another human beats even the big O.

We seem to agree on this as well as most of the rest of it. the communication aspect of any physical relationship (even non-physical ones) is most important. My ego can take it. If I've not done something that would have enhanced the experience -- I want to know. Deception in the most private of circumstances is usuallly evidence of a far larger issue. The vocalizations, the honest ones, are evidence enough during the act, I believe, to identify what's really working. If you don't get them, then find a convenient time to discuss why you didn't.

Yes, I want to be brought to the point where I can't even think anymore of anything except pleasure, but I want my partner to be brain-dead with me. Even if he pleases me perfectly I am still not satisfied unless I have given that feeling to him as well. Sex is a celebration ... of life, of love, and of passion. If I am the only one who enjoyed the party then there really WAS no party.

I am enjoying this discussion too, fathom, so I thank you, (and the others,) for replying seriously and with thought. All I did was propose the idea ... those who have replied have contributed far more than me.

 

[fathom7]

I am enjoying this discussion too, fathom, so I thank you, (and the others,) for replying seriously and with thought. All I did was propose the idea ... those who have replied have contributed far more than me.

You sell yourself short {{{{{{Moon}}}}}. The inventor of the lightbulb could not have achieved his genius without those before him who invented other things that made such manufacture possible. As with your thread -- you invented the discussion and the opportunity to communicate in a more serious fashion -- sharing ideas is an achievement for which I am truly grateful.

Now -- back to the humor (or if you're in the UK humour) part of the program.

 

[Moon Dragon]

You sell yourself short {{{{{{Moon}}}}}. The inventor of the lightbulb could not have achieved his genius without those before him who invented other things that made such manufacture possible. As with your thread -- you invented the discussion and the opportunity to communicate in a more serious fashion -- sharing ideas is an achievement for which I am truly grateful.

Now -- back to the humor (or if you're in the UK humour) part of the program.

Awh, you are sweet. You keep talking like that and I'll start blushing.

Humor? If you want to make me laugh say something really raunchy.

 

[fathom7]

Awh, you are sweet. You keep talking like that and I'll start blushing.

Humor? If you want to make me laugh say something really raunchy.

Sweet. Why thank you ma'am. As for raunchy -- this is hardly the forum for such suggestive prepositions --- errr propositions --- errrr positions -- speaking of which -- there's one out there I've heard about that might be worth our time and trouble. It only involves a couple of tractors, some sheep and a small livery stable. I hear it's fantastic.

 

[Vaire]

Although I do agree that really raunchy talk during sex makes the situation a little uncomfortable for me and is somewhat of a turnoff, I figure that it is a turn on for the other person. So in the spirit of give-and-take I play along enough to not make them feel embarrassed for saying anything. I've never felt like someone was talking like that because they thought I wanted to hear it. It was always clear that they were using it to play along with a fantasy that they have. And with some of the off center fantasies that I have, how can I criticize a person for asking me to play along with one of theirs? lol

 

[Moon Dragon]

Sweet. Why thank you ma'am. As for raunchy -- this is hardly the forum for such suggestive prepositions --- errr propositions --- errrr positions -- speaking of which -- there's one out there I've heard about that might be worth our time and trouble. It only involves a couple of tractors, some sheep and a small livery stable. I hear it's fantastic.

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