I can't stand you you motherfucking pathetic excuse for a human being. You play with my emotions when you want something, you poke at me because you know my triggers and you revel when I react. Well fuck you and the horse you were drug behind.
I AM doing what's best for our kids and you can tell yourself that you're a noble human being and sacrificing for the greater good. But we both know you are lying through your teeth. You haven't watched our children by yourself since the day I left the house we built. You have always counted on whatever woman you're seeing at the time to take care of them. You are a scared, sad, pathetic little man. A big dick doesn't make you a big boy, it just makes you fun to fuck.
I had to pick up the pieces of my heart when we split, I had to rebuild my ego, my self-worth and your children's sense of security. And never for any thanks, you prick. Only for them. No one thanks the single mothers, no one. I'd be up shit creek if I relied on it. Good thing I will take the fact that my children are awesomely well grounded as thanks enough.
I like this thread...it's like whispering, and having someone lean in to listen...
No outpourings of my soul here...just a smiling curvy woman who can be and craves good company...what I'd really like is a random PM to start an intelligent exchange...any takers?....................*sighs* ahhhh well...
What is going on with me lately, why do I feel so needy, insecure, and indecisive? This isn't me, that's not who I am. Why do my thoughts keep swirling? Why do I feel like something is wrong and I just can't put my finger on what it is? Did something change when I wasn't looking? I'm stronger than this, so why do I feel so lost?
Time to go back to my corner and let my inner voices argue with each other. Maybe one of them will finally win and I'll understand what is going on.
Why, even though I'm not having sex with anyone do I still shave my legs every day and keep up the bare areas? Why do I do this to myself? Like one day I'll randomly run in to that one person I want to jump on naked and I'll be prepared? So silly. So very silly.
Have you just ever thought you had absolutely amazing chemistry with someone ... only to come to the realization that this person pretty much has awesome chemistry with everyone because they're just that charismatic?
Sometimes full disclosure isn't always good. Sometimes it's a good idea to protect someone from knowing something that they can honestly do nothing about. All it would do is cast a weight on their shoulders or make them worry.
And no, My aSnoopy, nothing is being hidden from you. YOU have gotten full disclosure ... cause you wouldn't have it any other way.
I can't believe that over the past couple of days I have not cried or felt sad about losing him. Now I hear songs, watch movies or TV shows that we had both liked or that had reminded me of him and I didn't feel the pain like I had. Maybe the mourning period is over? Maybe the nice distraction of late has helped? Maybe closure is finally happening? Whatever the reason, I have been feeling more myself and not the fragile, insecure, moody person I had become. No matter who or what comes along, I know he will always remain in my heart, he will always be my place to land........my sweet happiness.
I am getting more and more anxious about that meeting, and it is actually ridiculous that I am. I guess it is just another step away from things. I need to focus on that and not anything else. Just a stepping stone K. Yep...That's where I"m going to stay, with that thought firmly in place.
Are you doing it again? Are you seriously making all these people worry about you because you had to run and hide again? This is why I can't love you. This is why we'd never work. Please do whoever still loves you a favor and get some help.
You promised you wouldn't hurt us, you promised you wouldn't do this to me again, you promised you would at least let me know you were safe. YOU PROMISED.
This is our promise to you, its the one we have always made. We promise we are going nowhere, we promise we will be here, we promise never to judge.
It's really sad that I'm lonelier since I chose to stay with you than I would be if I hadn't. I deserve to be more than something you can put up on the shelf until it's convenient or you want a distraction. I'm not really a whore, you know.
Why is it that lately I let my guard down, sadly hoping for more, only to be rejected, ignored, and played like some kind of fool. It's a shame that the only real person I have ever gotten to know on here is no longer here. At least when he spoke truthfully, honestly he spoke from the heart and was not afraid to show his every color. Maybe I'm just a classic fool and I keep attracting the 'jesters' around here. No 'knight on a white horse' for me. Hell I'll even take a midget on a Shetland pony. Guess it's time to turn in panties for a nun's hat.
How you might think that's all I think about. That couldn't be further from the truth, really. It's just that ... it's caution. It's keeping distance there. It's, quite simply, the only way I know how to connect with you at this point, that's all.
I'm feeling my way slowly. You don't get all the layers at once. No one does.
I actually think this is the most vital time of year of us. The most testing. When respective gravitational pulls desecrate the, at any other time of the year, almost sacredness of our routine. But then it passes and we're left with what was always there to begin with.