The ultimate chain letter

[entitled]

The Best Chain Letter Ever

Hello, my name is Lewis and I suffer from the guilt of not forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, a poor 6-year-old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a traveling freak show.

Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1000?

How stupid are we?

"Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next day!"

What a bunch of bullshit.

Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by Peter in 5 AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower.

Fuck 'em.

If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times.

I don't fucking care.

Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our own unpopularity.

The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny, send it on.


Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the ass of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this email.

Now forward this to everyone you know.

Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.

Have a nice day.

P.S. Send me 15 bucks

 

[imalickin]

lmao. thanks, i needed that.

 

[Guest]

*sigh*

another...
FROM THE DESK:MR FRANCIS WILSON.
BRANCH MANAGER,
UNITED BANK FOR AFRICA PLC (UBA)
PLOT 669, ILupeju STREET,
P O BOX 75455,VICTORIA ISLAND,
LAGOS-NIGERIA.

Dear Friend,
I feel quite safe dealing with you in this business proposition having
gone
through your remarkable profile on the internet. Though,this medium
(Internet)has been greatly abused,however I choose to reach you through
it
because it still remains the fastest,surest and most secured medium of
communication.
This correspondence is un-official and private,so i urge you to treat
as
such.

I am Mr Francis Wilson the branch Manager United Bank for Africa PLC.
Accounts and Bills Department Victoria-Island Lagos.

The President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria (Olusegun Obasanjo)
who is
also the president of African Union (AU) recently dismissed several top
government officials for Economic and Financial Crime Malpractices,with
all
their bank accounts frozen and their landed properties confiscated for
illegal aquisation.

On this note, officials serving in the present Government have started
taking some measures to guard against loosing all they have worked for
life
because an extensive investigation is presently going on by a team of
Auditors and Security Agents mandated by the president to search all
banks
and financial
institusion and expose culprits.

To prevent any form of victimazation from political opponent, a very
big
customer in my bank has mandated me to contact and solicite the
assistance
of a reliable person who would front for him as a foreign business
associate
and receive the sum of US$8,100,000,00.(Eight Million One Hundred
Thousand
United State Dollar) on his behalf for investment in your country.

This money is presently deposited in a Finance Company. Therefore all
we
require from you is to receive this fund on our behalf by providing a
good
bank account where this fund would be transferd into either by
Telegraphic
Transfer(TT) or via Internet Banking process (On-Line banking) since
this
two process has been confirmed to be safer,faster and more confidential
means of transfering fund.

As soon as this is done we will raise an invoice to cover the transfer
of
the fund as payment of goods and services to a foreign business
associate.
We shall compersate you with 30% of the fund after transfer and we
will refund to you any expences you may incure in the curse of the
transaction (Telephone Bills and Domestic expences on your side)

I look forward to a favourable response from you via this email address
franciswilson_03@yahoo.com for proper instruction to enable us
proceed
with
the transaction as soon as posible.

Yours Faithfully,
Mr Francis Wilson.

 

[impressive]

Wonder which "remarkable profile" he perused. *grin*

 

[Guest]

Wonder which "remarkable profile" he perused. *grin*

i dunno but
its hard to get past the 'loosing'

 

[impressive]

i dunno but
its hard to get past the 'loosing'

Oh, that's just the ESL coming through.

 

[MissBri]