The shrivel factor and a theory regarding beauty..

[Sparky Kronkite]

The famous Seinfeld (actually George's) "shrivel factor," or I should say, here in Manhattan - da shrivel facta - consider this.

Most guys having experienced this - what was your circumstance and "just how freakin' shriveled" did you get?

I broke ice in a dammed mountain pool, in late February, at an Outward Bound base camp, when I was 14 - and plunged naked, right on in. The fucking shock of it all!!!!! I felt like my pecker sucked up inside of me - but I proudly can say it did not. Also, considering I was a very physically immature 14, an acorn like crotch appendage I don't consider so bad.

I figure if a guy - no matter what age - jumps into an ice pool like this and extracts himself and still has a relative healthy lump of meat showing - well this is probably a very well endowed male. No?

Onto the realative subject of beauty. A truly good looking person (let's leave personality entirely out of this) a model speciman of a physical human being - well I have always contended - that if you dunk - a he or she - naked, with no make-up of any kind, and even a bad haircut, maybe even bald - into a pool of water and pull'em up dripping - if they look good then, all wet - they're pretty damn good looking people.

I fail this test miserably. How about you?

 

[TN_Vixen]

sparks, where do you get the ideas for your threads?

I imagine you sitting at your desk thinking up these things.. shrinkage? dunking? Did something trigger these thoughts or do they just appear out of nowhere in your most unique brain?

 

[Siren]

SPARKY YOU ARE ALL WET....

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Vix? These ideas......

Believe it or not - I highly identify with the Michael Keaton character in the old Ron Howard movie Night Shift.

They just fly out of me all the time - like a flock of birds or something. BAM!!!!

And their there - right on the tip of my brain.

 

[Expertise]

My acid test involves how she looks first thing in the a.m. Sans make-up and accoutrements if she looks good then shes golden if she looks good in mens Levis to boot ...i'm putty in her hands

 

[TN_Vixen]

well, in that case... who needs fiction? *smile* You probably entertain yourself quite thoroughly, hmm?

Michael Keaton. For some reason I've always been attracted to that man. I don't know what it is about him that heats me up, but I swear I just smile everytime I see him in anything. Of course I thought he was the hottest batman ever.

I agree with Siren tho.
If you get dunked and are still stunning? You're one beautiful person.

 

[Siren]

WELL EXPERTISE YOU NEED TO SLEEP WITH ME TO FIND OUT HOW I AM IN MORNING.

 

[TN_Vixen]

Siren?

"soaking wet?" Yes
"dunked" nada

 

[Alyrahh]

Reguardless of the beauty factor... don't ALL women look absolutely edible when they're wet? Take that any way you want.


Shrinkage: A friend of mine gave birth to her first child, a boy, a couple of years ago. She's a single mother, and comes from a family wherein she was one of three female children with no brothers. Anyhoo, she was very excited about getting to give her little prince his first real bath once the umbilical cord was gone, and called me on the telephone to share the experience with her. About 10 minutes into our phone conversation and the little buggers bath, I heard her gasp. She became hysterical, yelling over the phone "My God, what's wrong with him? What did I do?" I couldn't seem to calm her down enough to explain the problem and my house only being about a 3 minute drive from hers, I simply laid the phone down and ran to the car. When I stormed through her bathroom door, I found her sitting on the floor crying with her papoose wrapped in a towel and held tightly against her. She unwrapped him and again gasped "He's alright! It's back!"

I spent about half an hour explaining to her (between my fits of laughter) what had happened to him, and why.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Ah the image - the feel....

Vix soaking wet. And nothing cold or shriveled about her.

 

[Mustang Sally]

The ugly dunkling violently surfaces, spluttering, mascara streaming, hair plastered, a look of utter outrage on her once-lovely face.

No comparison to a steamy shower scene. Yum.

 

[Weird Harold]

...if you dunk - a he or she - naked, with no make-up of any kind, and even a bad haircut, maybe even bald ...

Sparky,
I fail before they get around to dunking me.

Mustang Sally,
You paint a very vivid image, but missed the no mak-up clause.

You also missed the pointy crinkled nipples which is waht all of the men are going to be looking at, thereby missing the look of outrage on her face.

 

[Mustang Sally]

Awww shoot! Ya got me, Harold. Twice! sigh..

Too bad, I rather liked my visual. Kinda my way of making fun of those glamorous ladies I'm so jealous of. You see, I never wear make-up. I wouldn't even know how!

As for the pointy nipples, you really don't have to dunk me in icy waters to get that effect.

 

[Weird Harold]

Too bad, I rather liked my visual.
...
As for the pointy nipples, you really don't have to dunk me in icy waters to get that effect.

Icy water wasn't my idea. I much prefer warm pointy nipples myself.

I loved your visual, it just didn't fit sparky's weird(er than I am) requirement.

 

[Mustang Sally]

Sparky's wierd requirements make sense in a wierd kind of way... But I'm not really sure why naked, un-coiffed and make-up-less isn't a good enough acid test for attractiveness. You know, natural beauty and all. Why the dunking?

Mmmm.. warm, pointy, tingling nipples!

 

[Cheri]

Reguardless of the beauty factor... don't ALL women look absolutely edible when they're wet? Take that any way you want.


Thank you sweetheart and I think your edible too! roflol Bet we'd have a paying audience if we ever skinny dipped!
As for your poor friend, being the hysterical first time mother I was, I perfectly understand. I thought my babies intestines were falling out when I saw that colapsed vein for the first time! lol

Oh Spark, I usually show great amount of pity and tell the poor shrunken guy to bring that cold little thing over here and my mouth will warm him up!

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Dearest Laurel......

Of course we/I have no idea who you are..... but......

Do you like to kiss? Do you like to hug? Do you like to lick your lover's ass? You know, I might realy love you.

Baby.....

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

God damn it.....

I fucked up again....

 

[Alyrahh]

[BThank you sweetheart and I think your edible too! roflol Bet we'd have a paying audience if we ever skinny dipped!
[/B]

Cheri, you beautiful blonde goddess you, c'mere. I'm drawing that road map as we speak!

I'm wondering, is there a support group for those of us who are addicted to Cheri?

 

[Mackdaddy_74]

How much to attend the show?

 

[Alyrahh]

It's free for you, spankdaddy. LOL

 

[Mackdaddy_74]

whoooooo!!!!!
know if I knew when and where................

 

[Fenris]

standing in line at the ticket window

ONe please,front row,aisle seat.

 

[Mackdaddy_74]

Do I get a backstage VIP pass?

 

[Alyrahh]

Mackdaddy

I'll have to discuss that with Cheri.