The SCOURIES reader – for both fans and serious scholars…

[lloyd_5]

PROUDLY PRESENTING


THE SCOURIES AND GABBY

2007 XMAS CARD​

Can't afford to actually send any as he didn't get any reality checks this year!!

http://www.christmasfiles.com/photos/74/med_bd2069-001.jpg​

Just thought I'd repost it because it clearly pissed you off as you ignored it.

Edited to add: Just because I can.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Hi, it’s [size=+2]Gabby[/size] again,

Gosh these ALTS get me so pissed off! And I've got an important scene to shoot this aft.

Jennylo wrote:I don't know who you are nor do I care to make the acquaintance, but when my name appears on a thread without any reason,

Is this from the girl who wrote:

Please DON'T! Writing requires brain cells.
A grateful reader,
Jenny

Go back to ALT land honey!

[size=+2]Gabriella L.[/size]
Club Sectretary, “1000+ VOTE CLUB”

No it isn't, you stupid rubber dolly-- anyone who actually takes the time to read posts can tell the difference in writing styles between Jennylo and Jenny.

But blow-up dolls can't read, and scouries has no conception that he's reading real people, since his 'friends' are all his own alts.

Like Jenny said, brain cells.

 

[jomar]

*sigh*

Carry on.

 

[Gabby_]

A really big job

Hi, it’s [size=+2]Gabby[/size] again,

Wow. I always knew he was wonderful, but it turns out the boss is an even bigger man than I thought.

Today he said to me, "Gabby, I used to think it was a good way to grab people's attention, getting people riled up in the forums. But I got a little too upset, sometimes, took things a little too personally, and I've said some mean things to some nice people. I think I owe some of my fellow Literoticans an apology."

Wow! What a guy, huh?

Of course, this is gonna mean more work for poor Gabby. The boss wants me to go right back to the beginning, from the very first post he ever made in the Literotica forums, and find all the times he called someone a mean name, put down their orientation or ethnicity, lied about sleeping with them, accused them of things they didn't do, or put them in a list they didn't deserve to be on, or didn't want to be included in.

Well, I've got a big job ahead of me, so I better get started!

[size=+2]Gabriella L.[/size]
Club Sectretary, “1000+ VOTE CLUB”

 

[Gabby_]

Hi, it’s [size=+2]Gabby[/size] again,

As promised, I've been looking through all his old posts, and I'm back with the first of what will probably be [size=+1]dozens if not hundreds of humble apologies[/size] from the boss.

For the first few months after he joined, the boss pretty much stuck to the amateur pic feedback forum, and lucky for me he went back and deleted all his early posts so I didn't have to go through those—that lightened my load a little!

But September twelfth, 2005 was [size=+1]the momentous day when the boss first popped into the hallowed ground of the Author's Hangout[/size], and in that post he asked of his fellow Litsters a few questions, such as “What is the average number of views for a story?” “Do stories get more views depending on what day of the week they are released?” and “Some author’s new stories are almost always at the top of the daily list. Does Literotica have a system whereby certain people are favored?”

Several kind AHers took the time to respond to the boss's questions, offering roses and smileys and words of welcome while they were at it.

Now, the boss actually didn't say anything mean to anyone in this particular thread. In fact, he didn't reply at all to any of the kind AHers who'd been so friendly and welcoming and politely answered his questions.

The boss feels bad about this, and even though it's about two and a half years too late, he wanted me to say [size=+1]a big THANK YOU to minsue, yui, geronimo_appleby, The_Darkness, and English Lady, the nice AHers[/size] who welcomed him and did their best to show the ropes to a newbie, way back when.

[size=+2]Gabriella L.[/size]
Club Sectretary, “1000+ VOTE CLUB”

 

[scouries]

Xmas cheer for the inmates....

D E L E T E D​

 

[tickledkitty]

But given we are now in the holiday season, I, james r scouries, have decided to act magnanimously and in a spirit of forgiveness this morning sent off eighteen boxed sets of my complete works (in the deluxe red leather bindings) along with a signed picture of the author.

Hopefully this will help bring solace to these tormented creatures as they face their last days in LITEROTICA LAND. It’ll almost like they’ll be bringing GOD into their cells.

Oooo, is it that nice Christmas card pic of you and Gabby that was posted on here? I sure hope so. While I'm not sure about it bringing solace or God to them, I'm sure it will give them a good chuckle. Really, it's so kind of you to spread good cheer this holiday season. Bless you.

ETA: I forgot the nanas! (Yep, that edit function still works, folks!)

 

[TxRad]

I see three more readers don't like your work.

I'd say add me to the list but I seem to be on several already.

 

[Stella_Omega]

...In fact I heard from the grand_high_poobah yesterday, and in his role as Lord High Warden of LITEROTICA’s prison system he confided the following to me:...

etc, etc.

Reality impinges on his fantasy world. There ain't no grand_high_poobah, and there ain't no prison, and there ain't no James R. Scouries-- just a poor little shrivelled balloon, rapidly deflating.

It could make a second-rate incest writer a little bitter, the poor bastard.

 

[hmmnmm]

It's still alive?

 

[scriptordelecto]

It's still alive?

I'm sure he'd claim that it was like the phoenix, rising from the ashes, but in reality it's more like a cockroach.

 

[FallingToFly]

oddly enough, my brother has a car named Phoenix. It's brain-damaged with a type of emphysema.

soooo tired. I wish Lit did have a banning system- i'd love for this twit to get the axe.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

PROUDLY PRESENTING


THE SCOURIES AND GABBY

2007 XMAS CARD​

Can't afford to actually send any as he didn't get any reality checks this year!!

http://www.christmasfiles.com/photos/74/med_bd2069-001.jpg​

In the spirit of Christmas, Dwali, Chanukah and all those slightly inferior religions, races and people you enjoy insulting;

May your todger wither and drop off.

 

[Guest]

oddly enough, my brother has a car named Phoenix. It's brain-damaged with a type of emphysema.

soooo tired. I wish Lit did have a banning system- i'd love for this twit to get the axe.

Can't we vote him off the island? I mean, this is a democracy, isn't it?

 

[scriptordelecto]

Can't we vote him off the island? I mean, this is a democracy, isn't it?

You've got my vote, DK.

 

[Gabby_]

Hi, it’s [size=+2]Gabby[/size] again,

I'm back with [size=+1]another humble apology[/size] from the boss.

Sheesh, the boss sure isn't making this any easier for me, what with all the edited and deleted posts. I'm afraid I'm probably missing some people who deserve an apology, but the best I can do, sometimes, is piece together his speeches when someone wisely thought to quote him, thus preserving his naughtiness for posterity.

So it is with the Winter Holiday Support Thread from around this time, two years ago. The boss made lots and lots of posts, and going by the responses, they weren't very nice, but they're all empty now!

Luckily, one clever lady did quote one of his posts, and it was a doozy! I won't make you read the whole thing, 'cause we all know how the boss can ramble on (I know, pot, kettle, don't tell me!).

Miss Cloudy, I happen to be a Literotica member and writer [blah, blah, blah] a writer who naively entered two stories in the Winter Holiday Contest. An author who had hoped for recognition from the reading public, plaudits from his peers and finally a great, green W accompanied by large cash awards. And what did I find Miss Cloudy?

CORRUPTION MISS CLOUDY. A small clique of people engaged in ballot stuffing, vote trading and underhand deals [blah, blah, blah].

If you aspire to be better Miss Cloudy, a simple thought - stop cheating, stop vote swapping, stop making deals, stop demanding of others what they’re doing here…. We could soon be calling you Lesscloudy or Partlysuuny or …..

[blah, blah]

J R Scouries esq.

Wow. [size=+1]What a dick[/size], huh? The boss himself admits it, he had no evidence that Cloudy had done any cheating of any kind, and in fact was just feeling sorry for himself after losing the contest, and is downright ashamed of himself for his baseless accusation.

[size=+1]On behalf of J R Scouries, please accept a deep, humble apology, Cloudy.[/size]

[size=+2]Gabriella L.[/size]
Club Sectretary, “1000+ VOTE CLUB”

 

[scouries]

new 1000+ vote story!!!

D E L E T E D​

 

[Guest]

what a threesome....

Look who's on top this morning! We've always loved different positions!

LITEROTICA Thursday, December 06, 2007: 10:00 p.m.

Most Comments: 24 hrs
1. All I Want for Xmas is a Big Dick - Sarahhh
2. A Strange New Breed Ch. 16 - dk
3. Candy Cane Cocked Cousin...and Mom – scouries

And then this a.m.
1. Candy Cane Cocked Cousin...and Mom
2. A Strange New Breed Ch. 16
3. Higher
4. All I Want for Xmas is a Big Dick

God life is good!!!!

the collective known as

[size=+2]

Official Grand-High Poobah of Literotica.

[/size]

 

[Black Tulip]

I know from previous contest experience that about 75% of the votes will disappear in the next sweep but still...

jrs

Really? Boy, times must be changing very quickly these days.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Really? Boy, times must be changing very quickly these days.

Things never change in scouries' world.

 

[scheherazade_79]

[size=+2]

“That’s all they want to read jim…your magnificent works. Even though condemned to die for being so rude to you, and with only days to live, still they spend their last hours curled up in their cells with one of your books. In fact, the fifteen we now have on Death Row have actually formed a scouries reading circle and each morning spend two hours together, gushing like fourteen year old girls over the gems they’ve read the night before.”

The "gushing" was the sound of me pissing my pants laughing

Condemned, or not condemned, I'm still confused about how "Scouries fans" and "serious scholars" can appear next to each other in the same sentence

Dying woman's request - can someone explain that one to me please?

 

[TxRad]

The "gushing" was the sound of me pissing my pants laughing

Condemned, or not condemned, I'm still confused about how "Scouries fans" and "serious scholars" can appear next to each other in the same sentence

Dying woman's request - can someone explain that one to me please?

It's an oxy and a moron

 

[scheherazade_79]

It's an oxy and a moron

Ah. I see. I won't bother asking who the moron is, then

 

[Guest]

Look who's on top this morning! We've always loved different positions!

LITEROTICA Thursday, December 06, 2007: 10:00 p.m.

Most Comments: 24 hrs
1. All I Want for Xmas is a Big Dick - Sarahhh
3. Candy Cane Cocked Cousin...and Mom – scouries

And then this a.m.
1. Candy Cane Cocked Cousin...and Mom
3. Higher
4. All I Want for Xmas is a Big Dick

God life is good!!!!

the collective known as

[size=+2]

Official Grand-High Poobah of Literotica.

[/size]

I want nothing to do with any threesome that has you in it.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Scouries, making these insinuations that other posters are in your pocket, or in your bed,-- in the face of their direct and specific demand that you refrain from doing so-- is the internet equivalent of sexual harassment, and, in extreme cases, has been treated as a virtual rape. Here is an account of an early occurance and here is a more recent happening.

You might be surprised to know that the ladies who frequent a sex-themed forum would be sensitive to such. But your attentions are unwelcome, and on a sex-themed site such as this one, we take harassment quite seriously. You should know that you are giving this forum ample ammunition to request that you be banned completely.