The Preacher

[Isolde]

Preacher

There was this preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get,
he could be found on the golf course, swinging away. It was an obsession.
One Sunday was a picture perfect day for golfing. The sun was out, no
clouds in the sky, and the temperature was just right. The preacher was in
a quandary as to what to do, and shortly, the urge to play golf overcame
him. He called an assistant to tell him that he was sick and could not do
church, packed the car up, and drove three hours to a golf course where no
one would recognize him. Happily, he began to play the course.
An angel up above was watching the preacher and was quite perturbed. He
went to the Lord and said, "Look at the preacher. He should be punished
for what he is doing." The Lord nodded in agreement. The preacher teed up
on the first hole. He swung at the ball, and it sailed effortlessly
through the air and landed right in the cup three hundred and fifty yards
(meters) away. A picture perfect hole-in-one. He was amazed and excited.
The angel was a little shocked. He turned to The Lord and said, "Begging
Your pardon, but I thought you were going to punish him." The Lord
smiled. "Think about it-who can he tell?"

 

[MysteryJKR]

hehe another good one hun. My threads never get replies either so i thought id make an appearance just for you. hehe

 

[SweetCherry]

LOL

That's a good one. Keep them coming. I'm starting to cheer up again a bit, but I always love a good joke!

 

[Isolde]

Speaking of responses Mystery...I responded back to your comment on your Mr T thread...

And I am glad it brought you a smile, Cherry...I know you need one right about now

 

[Mistress]

Cute! lol

 

[Canadian Tongue]

Another Golf Joke

Two avid golfers were out on the course. The first guy goes up to the tee and hits a bad shot off to the left. The second guy tees up and hits his shot off to the right. The first guy goes up to his ball and tries to hack it out. All of a sudden Mother Nature appears.

Mother Nature turns to the first golfer and proclaims. "You are killing my beautiful creation and for that you will be punished. Since you see it fit to destroy my Buttercups from this day forth you will never be able to eat butter. Each time you even smell butter you will become violently ill."

The first guy looks at the second and breaks out laughing.

"Why are you laughing?" asks the second man.

"I could have hit MY ball in the Pussy Willows like you did!"

 

[MysteryJKR]

Isolde i know ya replied again in the Mr t one. and you get cuter by the minute. lol. *hugs*

anywayz. i am subscribed to a joke mail thing and gets jokes everyday. but i just read and delete. maybe ill think bout posting some when there good enough. like here....

oh and oddly enough it has to do with StarWars. which makes it extra cool for me since i been a life long obscessed fan. hehe.

More You Know You're a Redneck Jedi When . . .

You use the force to cheat at fishing, bowling, and long-distance
spitting.

More than half the droids you own don't function.

The number of blasters you own exceeds your I. Q.

You wonder why Luke and Leia never got married.

You used a carbon-freezing chamber to store the 78 Wampas you shot
while vacationing on Hoth.

Your moonshine is made on the moon.

You don't like wearing a Jedi robe because it prevents access to the
dip stored in your back pocket.

Sandpeople back down from your mama.

You've used Jedi mind control to talk your way out of a DUI.

You've strangled people with the force because they laughed at your
accent.

You built an outhouse over the Sarlaac.

You've argued with a Jawa over scavenging rights to a broken droid.

A Wookie has told you that you need to shave.

You've wrecked several landspeeders while lighting cigarettes with
your lightsaber.

You don't think the Ewoks are primitive.

You've gone AT-AT tipping.

Jabba's pig guards think you have a hygiene problem.

You consider your lightsaber the ultimate bug zapper.

The Rancor monster refused to eat you.

You discovered that your greatest enemy is, in fact, your father, who
also happens to be your brother.