The perfect ones are always flawed

[Primalex]

Which flaws are acceptable for you and which do you think are a deal breaker?

Could your Dom be a compulsive gamer? What about the cardinal sins? Sloth? Gluttony? Pride? Or does dominance equal perfection, as nobody would accept a flawed leader?

 

[DesEsseintes]

Any submissive of mine would have to have the major character flaw of wanting to live with me. Any other flaws can be ironed out. And I am not necessarily meaning metaphorically.

 

[Primalex]

Any other flaws can be ironed out.

A common misconception in many relationships.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[kittiGoddess]

deleted

 

[DesEsseintes]

A common misconception in many relationships.

Oh, quite. Hence the joke about 'not metaphorically'.

'Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.'

 

[midwestyankee]

Oh, quite. Hence the joke about 'not metaphorically'.

Men marry women. Women marry men. Invariably they are both disappointed.

Fixed that for you.

 

[pensivepoet]

Fixed that for you.

That's depressing, but i find myself unable to muster an argument.

 

[BiBunny]

My only set-in-stone rule is that I no longer fuck with anybody that's crazier than me.

You'd think that'd give me a lot of leeway, but no. You'd be wrong.

 

[DesEsseintes]

Fixed that for you.

Thank God, then, for gay marriage.

 

[pensivepoet]

My only set-in-stone rule is that I no longer fuck with anybody that's crazier than me.

You'd think that'd give me a lot of leeway, but no. You'd be wrong.

We'd be good then. I only wanna fuck people who are crazier than me.
They're usually doin time.

 

[midwestyankee]

Thank God, then, for gay marriage.

It is a sign of considerable progress in western civilization that I considered further shortening the whole thing to: Men marry. Women marry. Etc.

 

[Riles]

Being taken for granted is a deal breaker for me, be it my emotions, my needs or my actions.

 

[MeekMe]

Which flaws are acceptable for you and which do you think are a deal breaker?

Acceptable? I dunno... Occasional smelly feet? I don't give much thought to the acceptable flaws because they're acceptable.
Deal breaker? A negative outlook. It would be a feedback loop of doom.

Could your Dom be a compulsive gamer? What about the cardinal sins? Sloth? Gluttony? Pride? Or does dominance equal perfection, as nobody would accept a flawed leader?

A compulsive gamer? No, I can handle gaming, but not if it were wrecking daily life. Cardinal sins? Meh... I like eating a lot and being lazy. Plus I have no use for religion.

Dominance does not equal perfection for me. I wouldn't accept a leader that appeared to always be perfect. It would make me uncomfortable and I'd always question their motives for being with horribly flawed me. I couldn't live with that uneasy feeling of wondering when I was going to be tossed aside.

With someone that has what I perceive to be flaws, acceptable or not, I feel like I have common ground with them. I can feel something mutual in that respect. Hm... Maybe that doesn't make sense?

My husband has flaws, but I can accept them, and in a way I appreciate them.

Side note: I asked if I had acceptable flaws. He answered with exactly what I thought he would. Only in my mind, I see it as an unacceptable flaw.

 

[BabblingBrooke]

Everyone has flaws. I need a relationship with a partner outside of BDSM, and that relationship will be with a flawed human (which is what he'll get with me, too). I cannot accept someone who harms children or helpless others, I cannot accept being taken for granted... I'm sure there would be other deal-breakers, but really these are the only that come to mind now.

 

[jezzilee]

Deal breakers for me:

Being taken for granted.
Someone who has no empathy.
Someone who does not like dogs.


Those are my top three.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

No, I would not choose to follow a leader that marketed themselves as perfect.

As far as deal breakers go, apathy or threats to my health or safety come to mind.

 

[IrisAlthea]

It's hard to be so categorical about specific flaws in a partner.
When a relationship has come to an end on my initiative, it has usually been about us not being a good fit anymore (or at all) or about not wanting to risk something important to me because of the relationship or the partner.

There is one specific thing though that I know I can't accept in a partner.
It is that certain kind of arrogant ignorance. The kind that makes it impossible to do something about those flaws, learn new things and evolve.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[midwestyankee]

Well, I am not disappointed yet, tell me oh wise ones, how long will it take until disappointment sets in? ( he tells me he is not either, though both of us have changed, grown, adapted to circumstance, not always by choice....sometimes by choice to meet life challenge...)

When the moon is in the seventh house
And Jupiter aligns with Mars.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[midwestyankee]

Ahh, we are both hairy ( him of body, me of head...actually, he has head hair too) and neither of us Aquarians . Does that mean we are ok?

Then peace will guide the planets
And love will steer the stars.

Harmony and understanding
Sympathy and trust abounding
No more falsehoods or derisions
Golden living dreams of visions
Mystic crystal revelation
And the mind's true liberation.
[You needn't be] Aquarius! [You needn't be] Aquarius!

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[midwestyankee]

You'll be doing Myers briggs personality tests with enthusiasm soon dear sir.

Sorry, I only ever feigned belief in astrology to get laid back in the age of aquarius.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]