the OOC for Blood Haven, a precast thread

[Sweetp4u]

mmmmm I do like devious minds and quests *grins* Good to know and lana is looking for some antiques to decorate her bedroom with.. NOT a man, tho one of those wouldn't be a bad deal either Hmmm artifacts huh? ... hmmm

And Isaac is outside Blood Haven, is he not? Owning land surrounding the city and parts of it? I will have to ponder this and see what twisted thing comes to my mind!

btw Lana is harmless.... really *weg* .... Ok she isnt AS bad as Lilith on the danger meter... Wait, can someone be ridden to death??? hmmm ANYWAY Nice and slow is as good as throwing one's ass to the floor and taking it... isnt it? Besides I didn't give Lana super human strength, just .... well you read it Im sure lol

OK im bad tonight, I need to wash my brain out with soap! lol

So for the right price would Redgrave let Lana stick 'pins' in him to see if anything she concocts up weakens him temporarily?? How about a book of potions.. hmm Lots of stuff in the head and I need to go sleep! Dont work too hard Kitten

 

[kittenofdeath]

mmmmm I do like devious minds and quests *grins* Good to know and lana is looking for some antiques to decorate her bedroom with.. NOT a man, tho one of those wouldn't be a bad deal either Hmmm artifacts huh? ... hmmm

And Isaac is outside Blood Haven, is he not? Owning land surrounding the city and parts of it? I will have to ponder this and see what twisted thing comes to my mind!

btw Lana is harmless.... really *weg* .... Ok she isnt AS bad as Lilith on the danger meter... Wait, can someone be ridden to death??? hmmm ANYWAY Nice and slow is as good as throwing one's ass to the floor and taking it... isnt it? Besides I didn't give Lana super human strength, just .... well you read it Im sure lol

OK im bad tonight, I need to wash my brain out with soap! lol

So for the right price would Redgrave let Lana stick 'pins' in him to see if anything she concocts up weakens him temporarily?? How about a book of potions.. hmm Lots of stuff in the head and I need to go sleep! Dont work too hard Kitten

Oh he lives inside Haven, although the land he bought was mostly outside haven at the time, the citys expansion quickly put it all inside its limits, however its currectly managed by Talons people, with all the profits earned from it going directly to them. He could make a fuss and take it back, but he honestly cant be bothered to deal with it himself so he just lets them use it as they see fit.

As for the fun with pins and Isaacs body, if she played her cards right, it would be free, he would probably get a kick out of it, if she poked and prodded in the right places he might even throw in that potions book free as well.

 

[BLACK BART]

Great posts Light and Mask, I'm enjoying the sexual tension the two you are building...

Excellent plotting, keep it up, and Mask, don't pay Talon any mind, he'll take the bad wolf out himself, ok?

Caela, Talon might hire your character just to hedge his bet, but he won't waste the money on a party crasher, look for a meesenger later in the thread asking her to meet him, ok?

Kitten....Veroe..... be careful of what Sweet is planning, she is, as always up to NO good, doing what she does best, causing TROUBLE

My post is done, the glove has been tossed Logan

 

[caela]

I thank you for the offer, though I do deeply hope I needn't take you up on it. And are you sure she wouldn't want to eat Loren? Not... not even a nibble? please?

Nope, she won't want to eat Loren. Definitely not to her tastes to try and drain someone she isn't being paid to take out.

 

[caela]

Great posts Light and Mask, I'm enjoying the sexual tension the two you are building...

Excellent plotting, keep it up, and Mask, don't pay Talon any mind, he'll take the bad wolf out himself, ok?

Caela, Talon might hire your character just to hedge his bet, but he won't waste the money on a party crasher, look for a meesenger later in the thread asking her to meet him, ok?

Kitten....Veroe..... be careful of what Sweet is planning, she is, as always up to NO good, doing what she does best, causing TROUBLE

My post is done, the glove has been tossed Logan

Hey she didn't mean to crash a party! Just bad timing. Will be waiting for the messenger, though you'll have to decide what precisely you're hiring her for.

 

[BLACK BART]

Hey she didn't mean to crash a party! Just bad timing. Will be waiting for the messenger, though you'll have to decide what precisely you're hiring her for.

Heh, I was referring to logans character Ken

 

[MaskofSand]

Great posts Light and Mask, I'm enjoying the sexual tension the two you are building...

Excellent plotting, keep it up, and Mask, don't pay Talon any mind, he'll take the bad wolf out himself, ok?

Caela, Talon might hire your character just to hedge his bet, but he won't waste the money on a party crasher, look for a meesenger later in the thread asking her to meet him, ok?

Kitten....Veroe..... be careful of what Sweet is planning, she is, as always up to NO good, doing what she does best, causing TROUBLE

My post is done, the glove has been tossed Logan

Oh, good.
I don't think Marc would be very happy if she just suddenly jumped out of his arms to go attack someone... Then came back sweaty, bloody, and panting.
"Now where were we...?"

 

[LoganDarkHolme]

My post is done, the glove has been tossed Logan

*scratchs the stubble of beard on his chin his brow arching*


oh no....NOW the gauntlet has been laid, come get me Bloodsucker

 

[BLACK BART]

*scratchs the stubble of beard on his chin his brow arching*


oh no....NOW the gauntlet has been laid, come get me Bloodsucker

yeah, I see, run away, toss a bomb and then go kill something that fits only your plot?

That's a gauntlet alright, somebody PLEASE kill my character! LOL

 

[LoganDarkHolme]

you has PM

 

[LoganDarkHolme]

your right i did make a mistake, i just fixed it hope that suits things better, my apologies for hte short sightedness

 

[BLACK BART]

your right i did make a mistake, i just fixed it hope that suits things better, my apologies for hte short sightedness

Alls good The fight is on the balcony and may the best man win

 

[LoganDarkHolme]

*snerks*

 

[BLACK BART]

Logan? I know it's a fight scene and actions mighr be hard to envision but if you notice what you write Ken doing to Talon I respond to it in my next post?

For example you write Ken lifts Talon and swings a punch for his chin, so in my next post I continue with those same actions, then move on to Talons actions giving it the continuity the story needs?

You write...

With a snarl of rage his hands shot out, wrapping in the vampires shit he hefted him from the chair, his face screwed up, teeth bared,

"who the FUCK do you think you are talking to ME like that vampire" he hissed between lycan teeth he shook Talon as the rage vibrated off of him "I am Kennedy Vella'morte one of the last few remaining pureblood clans of the were-wolf clans, i dont give a fuck if you are the master of this city" his hands unravel from Talons shirt, Ken lets his arm snap Back and he lets fly with a right Hook to talons jaw


I respond to your actions and write

Talon smiled as Ken helped him to his feet and swung the first punch.... the blow connecting and stinging, turning his head but not rocking his world.



I then write Talons actions....

Talon continued to push Ken's buttons, straightening his tie before almost casually back handing the man, the blow knocking the angry Lycan several feet back and putting him exactly where Talon wanted him to be.

"Bad puppies get kicked outside, don't you know that?"

Talon timed his step, then spun, kicking the lycan square in the sloar plexus, the force of the blow lifting the angry wolf and tossing him through the ornately scrolled plate glass windows before the balcony."What's a good party without a fight or two though, hmmm?"

Talon followed the path of Ken and the destruction of his windows, to find the man climbing to his feet and growling with pure feral anger.

"Now lets have a good old fight, shall we?"

Talon gripped the mans hair as he rose and brought a knee up, slamming it into Ken's stomach a second time to weaken it and drive the breath from him, then drove his own fist into the mans chin....


So the fight makes sense...so far our characters are doing the same thing....

ok so you write...

the First blow caught him and sent him back, Ken Snarled again and howled his rage but the second blow he saw coming, bringing both arms up the blow landed solidly but was absorbed into his forearms as the force of the kick threw him back.

this part is fairly good, you bring my actions into your post, the writing flows together and it makes sense...even this part works as you give it more detail...

Kens body wrapped into a ball as he spun back, landing in a crouch on his feet he skidded back about 3 feet before coming to rest, his fingernails, turned claws having dug into the balcony to slow his momentum he stood up,


But heres what I'm after and want to point out

as his hair was yanked up Ken's instincts were firing on all Cylinders, his beast coming to his call his arms pulsed with power, his hand snapping up he caught Talon's Leg before contact was made,

Here you not only ignore my characters actions but also insert your own, where I've written two seperate and invidual blows, and then you go into your own....what?. that I copied as you wrote it below.....



he let Talons fist connect, using the momentum from the blow he spun around on his left heel, the momentum from the spin lashing out into his hand, his hair breaking loose from talon's grip his right hand shot out in a vicious backhand, balancing off from his left foot to his right his left Leg kicked out as Ken finished the spin once more aimed high for Talons head



Reading this and having written my characters part of it.... it no longer makes sense... and if you're going to ignore my writing, or perhaps you missed reading it, then wrote over it with your own.... I'm not sure how to respond or IF I should

So? Please go back and look again... I haven't responded because of this and the thread is on stand still from my veiw point, you gotte read closer in any writers post to your character and respond in suit, or the actions and plot getmessed up fast...

 

[LoganDarkHolme]

Edited because now that ive had my first cup of coffee this whole thing just made sense to me LOL ill get right on it

 

[kittenofdeath]

Logan? I know it's a fight scene and actions mighr be hard to envision but if you notice what you write Ken doing to Talon I respond to it in my next post?

For example you write Ken lifts Talon and swings a punch for his chin, so in my next post I continue with those same actions, then move on to Talons actions giving it the continuity the story needs?

You write...

With a snarl of rage his hands shot out, wrapping in the vampires shit he hefted him from the chair, his face screwed up, teeth bared,

"who the FUCK do you think you are talking to ME like that vampire" he hissed between lycan teeth he shook Talon as the rage vibrated off of him "I am Kennedy Vella'morte one of the last few remaining pureblood clans of the were-wolf clans, i dont give a fuck if you are the master of this city" his hands unravel from Talons shirt, Ken lets his arm snap Back and he lets fly with a right Hook to talons jaw


I respond to your actions and write

Talon smiled as Ken helped him to his feet and swung the first punch.... the blow connecting and stinging, turning his head but not rocking his world.



I then write Talons actions....

Talon continued to push Ken's buttons, straightening his tie before almost casually back handing the man, the blow knocking the angry Lycan several feet back and putting him exactly where Talon wanted him to be.

"Bad puppies get kicked outside, don't you know that?"

Talon timed his step, then spun, kicking the lycan square in the sloar plexus, the force of the blow lifting the angry wolf and tossing him through the ornately scrolled plate glass windows before the balcony."What's a good party without a fight or two though, hmmm?"

Talon followed the path of Ken and the destruction of his windows, to find the man climbing to his feet and growling with pure feral anger.

"Now lets have a good old fight, shall we?"

Talon gripped the mans hair as he rose and brought a knee up, slamming it into Ken's stomach a second time to weaken it and drive the breath from him, then drove his own fist into the mans chin....


So the fight makes sense...so far our characters are doing the same thing....

ok so you write...

the First blow caught him and sent him back, Ken Snarled again and howled his rage but the second blow he saw coming, bringing both arms up the blow landed solidly but was absorbed into his forearms as the force of the kick threw him back.

this part is fairly good, you bring my actions into your post, the writing flows together and it makes sense...even this part works as you give it more detail...

Kens body wrapped into a ball as he spun back, landing in a crouch on his feet he skidded back about 3 feet before coming to rest, his fingernails, turned claws having dug into the balcony to slow his momentum he stood up,


But heres what I'm after and want to point out

as his hair was yanked up Ken's instincts were firing on all Cylinders, his beast coming to his call his arms pulsed with power, his hand snapping up he caught Talon's Leg before contact was made,

Here you not only ignore my characters actions but also insert your own, where I've written two seperate and invidual blows, and then you go into your own....what?. that I copied as you wrote it below.....



he let Talons fist connect, using the momentum from the blow he spun around on his left heel, the momentum from the spin lashing out into his hand, his hair breaking loose from talon's grip his right hand shot out in a vicious backhand, balancing off from his left foot to his right his left Leg kicked out as Ken finished the spin once more aimed high for Talons head



Reading this and having written my characters part of it.... it no longer makes sense... and if you're going to ignore my writing, or perhaps you missed reading it, then wrote over it with your own.... I'm not sure how to respond or IF I should

So? Please go back and look again... I haven't responded because of this and the thread is on stand still from my veiw point, you gotte read closer in any writers post to your character and respond in suit, or the actions and plot getmessed up fast...

If I may?

The Logan does address all the actions Talon made, though what happens at the end isn’t well described in his post. I’ll explain my views, starting with a blow by blow commentary from both perspectives as I see them.

Fight according to BB:

Ken throws right hook, hits Talons jaw, Talons head is moved but his stance is unaffected.
Talon backhands Ken, hit and knocks ken back several feet.
Talon spinkicks Ken in the solar plexus (n never cluster in the upper abdomen to memory) Ken is knocked straight through a plate glass window and lands ungracefully.
Ken begins to stand.
Talon pulls Ken up by the hair, knees him in the stomach, then follows through with a punch to the face.

Fight according to Logan:

Ken throws right hook, hits Talons jaw, Talons head is moved but his stance is unaffected.
Talon backhands ken, hit and knocks ken back several feet.
Talon spinkicks at Ken, Ken blocks with forearms, is thrown back on to balcony (window not mentioned) lands well and stands.
Talon grabs Kens hair and attempts to knee him in the stomach, Ken catches the leg before it connects.
Talon throws a punch, hits Ken in the chin.
Ken spins on left heel, momentum pulling his hair free and launching a backhand attempt (success unknown)
Ken shifts weight back on to right foot and finishes the spin with a kick aimed for Talons head.

As I see it, the fight makes sense up until the balcony is reached, at which point the two accounts begin to diverge, Talon throws two attacks, that is clear in both posts, as is the second attacks success (in both posts Ken gets hit in the chin) the first attack, described as a hit by BB, however is blocked in Logans version, this in itself isn’t a major difference, no more than his blocking the kick with his arms earlier (it is plausible that Talon believed the hit to be a success, as the way I read both the posts made me imagine it with Ken hunching slightly after the knee, perhaps he didn’t see Ken block)

Two different stories, but both coherent and able to work with each other, the only problem up until that point in my mind is the omission of any mention of the plate glass window but Logan. After that point however, things to become a tiny bit fuzzy for me to envision.

Talons punch is described as hitting Ken in the chin in BB’s post and Logan does nothing to alter that fact (he does however mention that the hit was ‘allowed’ implying he might have moved slightly to lessen the impact) now a punch to the chin pushes its target backwards, while Ken is described by Logan as using it to launch in to a spinning manoeuvre, which would be more consistent with an impact to the jaw. After this, Ken uses the momentum from his spin to do three things, the first two are to free his hair somehow, and to strike out at Talon with a backhand, both of these make sense, the force of the punch along with the apparent twisting could have gotten him free, and the backhand would be easy to pull off during a spin (though it wasn’t stated if it hit).

The third action preformed at the end of the heelspin is to attempt to kick talon in the face after having shifted his weight on to his opposite foot (his right one) this is where things either not make sense at all or rely on things unexplained. By my interpretation, the two combatants are relatively close to each other (about half the length of a leg, since people are getting kneed in the gut) meaning there is practically no room to make an effective kick aimed anywhere at Talon, it could work, but it would do nothing but put Ken in a bad position (with the assumed distance, the point of impact for Kens leg would be somewhere on his shin, closer to his knee than his foot) which doesn’t sound like the actions of such an old and experienced werewolf. In that post, there were two things that could have made this last bit make allot more sense, the backhand at talon, understandably it effect was left untold so BB could have Talon react how he wished, but if Logan had written something about how it would be easy to dodge on purpose to drive Talon back and put him off guard, he could have then combined it with the part where he shifted his weight on his feet, saying that it put him in a better position for the kick.


In the end, both posts do work together, sorta, though they clearly lack coordinated thought between authors, that said, I’ve seen far worse in every way, and if I said anything either of you found disagreeable, I apologise, my intent was to be helpful.

 

[LoganDarkHolme]

naw Kitten your alright, the last actions in my post you and BB are right were out of sync and not well defined, so once again that was my error, having never written with BB or the others in the thread before its my fault for not better understanding their style of writing vs. my own, easily fixable though, im just pissing Talon off anyway but hey, its my ass about to get owned XD im sure he will make me pay for it

Edit: I re wrote the last pieces of my post hopefully this clears up any more confusion, ill make sure from now on to stop writing posts when im tired XD

 

[laceandcogs]

(tears eyes away from Light and Mask) ...wait, there's a fight? Where?

 

[BLACK BART]

(tears eyes away from Light and Mask) ...wait, there's a fight? Where?

LOL!!!!

Thank god, no wait! Thank our Mask for the good laugh!!!!!

Logan and I plotted this fight to raise eyebrows and at some point we'd reveal it was all in good fun.... My critque of his writng was to intensify the tension

*gulp*

I guess it worked? I got a "wtf" Pm from one concerned writed and a "should I break it up?" from another *winces*

even riled kitten enough to enter the discussion......

*sighs* How come every time I try to pull a prank? *grumbles*

*scratches head* Now what the h*** do I do?

 

[LoganDarkHolme]

*cracks up laughing*

ive got just the one PM asking if the writer should step in LOL, i told them kindly no thanks we had it handled LOL,


anyway BB you gots PM

 

[BLACK BART]

fight night on the top floor of the castle.... nobody leaves, nobody gets left out!

 

[LoganDarkHolme]

and just so peeps know XD were not trying to be post hogs, just finishing off the fight scene and all will go back to normal, XD sorry to monopolize the board tonight

 

[BLACK BART]

We BE dah HOGS, yeah

*sticks chest out and tries to suck in dah belly*


All done and wanted to say thanks Logan, it's been a fun evening

 

[LoganDarkHolme]

*gives BB the finger*

 

[BLACK BART]

*gives BB the finger*

BAD puppy! So bad, Bad, BAD!!! Keep it up and Talon may contact the angel after all