The Most Insane Pre-Nup Ever

[Vincent E]

From TheSmokingGun.com comes this little item involving a fella who let his fantasies go a little overboard.

It seems our hero decided to draw up a list of duties and rules for his betrothed to follow. One thing is for sure, this guy could never be accused of not knowing what his expectations of marital life were. In fact, I would bet that if more guys like him actually drew up rules like this, most bad marriages could be avoided long before walking down that isle.

On the other hand, if this asshole had merely come to this website and asked a volunteer editor to proofread for him, he could have avoided at least a dozen grammatical and spelling errors. The truth is that his list would merely have been looked upon as nothing more than a bad S&M submission - until his fiancee gave it to the cops.

Then again one would think that she would have caught on as to just what kind of jerkwad he was long before this.

Edit: The most laughable part is his requirement regarding her skirt length in church.

 

[TheEarl]

Jeeeesus.

I have... no words.

The Earl

 

[Guest]

I'd remove his testicles.


(edited to add) - With a Katana blade.

 

[Vincent E]

I'd remove his testicles.


(edited to add) - With a Katana blade.

If you did, then he would have a "vaginal slit."

 

[entitled]

It's people like him that give BDSM a bad name.

 

[MasterPhoenix]

shakes head

 

[Guest]

If you did, then he would have a "vaginal slit."

What a horse's ass.

I hope he has fun in prison.

 

[rgraham666]

Message to Mr. Frey.

She's your wife. She's not your property.

Asshole.

 

[Stella_Omega]

It's people like him that give BDSM a bad name.

Yeppers!

 

[entitled]

Yeppers!

Then there's the rest of us...

 

[Stella_Omega]

Then there's the rest of us...

and we give it such a go-o-o-o-od name...

 

[entitled]

and we give it such a go-o-o-o-od name...

Or something.

 

[Boota]

Well, everything looked to be in good order to me, aside from his spelling and grammar. It was very clear and laid out perfectly as to what was expected of her. The fact that she didn't run screaming from that psycho says a lot about her.

What really makes me think he was a total freak was that font. Who would draw up a contract in that font? Weird.

 

[BlackShanglan]

Boota's right. As I was reading this, the chief thing going through my head was, "And you married him after you read this?"

It's so cute the way the only language he seems to know is "demand." I wonder how well that flies at work. I also thought it was amusing that he specifically stated that she's not permitted to be condescending to him. Now, whatever might make him think that she might be tempted to?

 

[1337_G1RL]

screw loose...

That guy needs to understand that his wife has feelings and needs too... what an asshole.

1337

 

[carsonshepherd]

Boota's right. As I was reading this, the chief thing going through my head was, "And you married him after you read this?"

No kidding. What a moron!

 

[Guest]

Boota's right. As I was reading this, the chief thing going through my head was, "And you married him after you read this?"

It's so cute the way the only language he seems to know is "demand." I wonder how well that flies at work. I also thought it was amusing that he specifically stated that she's not permitted to be condescending to him. Now, whatever might make him think that she might be tempted to?

I read about his arrest. He's also facing pedophilia charges from materials police found downloaded on his computer.

He's charged with kidnapping of his wife, though, because apparently he tied her to the bed for a time and wouldn't let her leave. She never signed the marriage contract, so I wonder if he introduced it after they were married?

Still, there must have been a few cues as to his extreme idiocy before they were married. What the hell was she thinking?

 

[Vincent E]

He's charged with kidnapping of his wife, though, because apparently he tied her to the bed for a time and wouldn't let her leave. She never signed the marriage contract, so I wonder if he introduced it after they were married?

Sarah, you need to re-read the final page. He covers himself by explicitly stating that the document is not a contract but a list of rules and expectations. And, he mentions her being tied to the bed if she runs out of Good Behavior Days (GBDs) and transgresses any of his rules.

I'd bet that the first time he showed it to her (the document, not that other thing) she thought that it was kind of kinky. After she found some kiddie porn on the computer she probably said she would report him to the police. That probably cost her all her GBDs and got her tied to the bed.

Wait a minute...why the fuck am I trying to find a motivation for these strange people?

 

[crazycatt]

!

Unbelievable

 

[Guest]

Sarah, you need to re-read the final page. He covers himself by explicitly stating that the document is not a contract but a list of rules and expectations. And, he mentions her being tied to the bed if she runs out of Good Behavior Days (GBDs) and transgresses any of his rules.

I'd bet that the first time he showed it to her (the document, not that other thing) she thought that it was kind of kinky. After she found some kiddie porn on the computer she probably said she would report him to the police. That probably cost her all her GBDs and got her tied to the bed.

Wait a minute...why the fuck am I trying to find a motivation for these strange people?

Laughing - Kinky is good.

But this document and this guy are both just stupid.

 

[Lucifer_Carroll]

What makes this less funny is the knowledge that this is the unwritten contract most men have in mind when marrying or dating a woman. Men need to grow up from their pathetic coddled existences and learn that women are human beings and not their sex slaves.

 

[Guest]

What makes this less funny is the knowledge that this is the unwritten contract most men have in mind when marrying or dating a woman. Men need to grow up from their pathetic coddled existences and learn that women are human beings and not their sex slaves.

Hey Luc -

You are quite right. Which is why the world would be much safer if this man did not still have possession of his testicles.

I'm just thinking of the children.

 

[SEVERUSMAX]

From what I've heard, there are plenty of men who are NOT pathetic or coddled, nor do they need to "grow up". Face it, there are narcissists a plenty on both sides of the gender divide.

 

[Guest]

From what I've heard, there are plenty of men who are NOT pathetic or coddled, nor do they need to "grow up". Face it, there are narcissists a plenty on both sides of the gender divide.

Of course there are. Many of them.

And I don't believe Luc was referencing ALL men. Just the assholes.

 

[SEVERUSMAX]

I simply differed with his use of the word "most".