The Marxist-Needs-Midol Charity Drive

[KillerMuffin]

A sad, sad thing has happened to one of our beloved board members, ladies and gentlemen. Our Marxist, the one and only possessor of the great microchococlit, has contracted a horrible, horrible syndrome. It is with a heavy heart that I come before you today to announce this terrible thing that has come to pass.

During Marxist's brief sabbatical from us, he wandered amongst the natives and managed to contract premenstrual syndrome. Yes, our friend is suffering and in much pain.

His family and close friends have tapped themselves financially to get him the medical attention he is in dire need of, but with the doctor bills and the cost of the Internet, they haven't enough left over to get Marxist that vital medication that he so desperately needs.

So, ladies and gentlemen, I am asking you to dig deep into your hearts and help heal this poor man of his suffering. Help him keep the wolves of his syndrome at bay with the purchase of this vital medication and a hot water bottle. Please, find it in your hearts to donate your spare change to the Marxist-Needs-Midol fund. It's tax deductible and you can feel good knowing that you helped cure Marxist of his PMS.

Send all donations to PO Box 1111, New York, New York in care of the Marxist-Needs-Midol Fund and we will see this man on the road to recovery!

Thank you.

 

[RosevilleCAguy]

Can't we just save the money and euthanize poor Marxist instead?


I really do want to help, but I can't afford Midol.

 

[Sukit_beatch!]

Yo. In prison, there were a bunch of faith healers. They were all over the place. One of them thought I had potential to be a faith healer in training. He taught me all the good tricks. I thought I had found a legitimate career for when I was sprung. The day came when I was to take my final test. I thought I had done a fantastic job convincing another prisoner that I had removed his badstuff. Unfortunately I failed. In my drive to make everything perfect, I fried the chicken livers. It just didn't work out.

 

[Marxist]

A sad, sad thing has happened to one of our beloved board members, ladies and gentlemen. Our Marxist, the one and only possessor of the great microchococlit, has contracted a horrible, horrible syndrome. It is with a heavy heart that I come before you today to announce this terrible thing that has come to pass.

During Marxist's brief sabbatical from us, he wandered amongst the natives and managed to contract premenstrual syndrome. Yes, our friend is suffering and in much pain.

His family and close friends have tapped themselves financially to get him the medical attention he is in dire need of, but with the doctor bills and the cost of the Internet, they haven't enough left over to get Marxist that vital medication that he so desperately needs.

So, ladies and gentlemen, I am asking you to dig deep into your hearts and help heal this poor man of his suffering. Help him keep the wolves of his syndrome at bay with the purchase of this vital medication and a hot water bottle. Please, find it in your hearts to donate your spare change to the Marxist-Needs-Midol fund. It's tax deductible and you can feel good knowing that you helped cure Marxist of his PMS.

Send all donations to PO Box 1111, New York, New York in care of the Marxist-Needs-Midol Fund and we will see this man on the road to recovery!

Thank you.

KM,

Just because you were born and raised an Irish Traveler doesn't mean you have to continually perpetrate elaborate ruses on the board.

-smirks in sadness-

 

[KillerMuffin]

It's worse than I thought.

Please, can you not see your way to helping out the poor PMS-stricken man?

 

[honeylick]

are there tax-benefits associated with this type of donation?

 

[Guest]

I didn't think he seemed that bitchy.

 

[badasschick]

I'd be so willing to donate my services, but I can't help anyone who doesn't want to be helped.