The "Least Likely Events" Thread

[shereads]

Who can top this as the least likely event to occur in our lifetime:

Paul Bremmer makes a nostalgic return to Iraq, this time as a tourist.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

Paul Bremmer returns to Iraq to meet with American ground forces observing the interim Iraqi government, ten years after the Iraqi Sovereignty hand-over, without being fragged.

 

[gauchecritic]

I can cap that easily.

Me knowing who the hell all these obscure people are, that you Yankees keep dreaming up.

Gauche

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

I can cap that easily. Me knowing who the hell all these obscure people are, that you Yankees keep dreaming up...

That’s right! Great Britain used to hold the record for insularity.

 

[rgraham666]

Shrubbie gets his mug on Mount Rushmore?

 

[shereads]

That’s right! Great Britain used to hold the record for insularity.

Smiley when you say that.



You know how the Brits love their emoticons.

 

[shereads]

Shrubbie gets his mug on Mount Rushmore?

RG, in the name of all that's holy, don't even think it.

 

[SummerMorning]

We get the Shrub Moonbase...

LOL

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Least likely?

I would say that in my life time we get a presidential candidate who isn't a crumb bum. Someone who is intelligent, thoughtful, honest and has the integrity to turn down gazillions of dollars from special interests because he feels taking the money would create a conflict of interest. A man who has the foerign policy clout to bring people to the table, but also has the diplomatic skill to get things accomplished once they are there. A man who understands economics and bussiness well enough not to stifle growth, but also understands when regulation is not only prudent, but needed.

A man who even opponents can look to and say while I disagre with his politics, I respect the man.

I think that's least likely of all possibilities.

-Colly

 

[Guest]

Smiley when you say that.



You know how the Brits love their emoticons.

I'm with Gauche on this, who are these people?

I don't mean the ones mentioned in the posts, I mean the posters themselves.

Lou

P.S.

 

[shereads]

Least likely?

I would say that in my life time we get a presidential candidate who isn't a crumb bum. Someone who is intelligent, thoughtful, honest and has the integrity to turn down gazillions of dollars from special interests because he feels taking the money would create a conflict of interest. A man who has the foerign policy clout to bring people to the table, but also has the diplomatic skill to get things accomplished once they are there. A man who understands economics and bussiness well enough not to stifle growth, but also understands when regulation is not only prudent, but needed.

A man who even opponents can look to and say while I disagre with his politics, I respect the man.

I think that's least likely of all possibilities.

-Colly

Make your candidate a woman and you're halfway there.

Give her a campaign finance system under which the person you describe could compete with a candidate running a multimillion-dollar advertising campaign, and you're darn close.

Give her a lesbian life-partner who works for Planned Parenthood and we're cooking!

Now add the partner's mixed-race child from her previous marriage, and let the three parents have an "open-family relationship" which includes the partner's ex-husband, who is frequently seen on the campaign trail when he isn't needed back at "the Clinic."

Also, it would be nice if the child appeared on "Oprah" to promote her daddy's children's book, "My 2 Mommies."

Now let them carry one state. No, two: one blue state and one red state.

 

[shereads]

Did I forget to add that the daddy wears a dashiki? And that the last time they all took a vacation together, they accompanied "Uncle Paul" Bremmer to his vacation timeshare in Kabul?

 

[gothgodess]

Who can top this as the least likely event to occur in our lifetime:

Paul Bremmer makes a nostalgic return to Iraq, this time as a tourist.

Sadam Hussain winning the nobel peace prize.

 

[cantdog]

oo

Gothgodess, you almost have 100 posts, girl! AV time!!!

I can hardly wait. We need more suicide girls type flash and funk in the place.

Post on!!!

 

[Guest]

Cant, hombre, I like a man who notices the details. P.

 

[cantdog]

I cherish the details

What's it for, otherwise?

You're a beautiful creature, love.

 

[gothgodess]

Re: oo

Gothgodess, you almost have 100 posts, girl! AV time!!!

I can hardly wait. We need more suicide girls type flash and funk in the place.

Post on!!!

thanks for noticing. lol

 

[oggbashan]

Least likely...

1. Margaret Thatcher is elected President of the US.

2. A German Jew is elected Secretary General of the UN.

3. Africa finds a cure for AIDS.

4. Monaco gets most medals at the Olympics.

5. Canada becomes the coolest place in the world to live.

6. Five Belgians become world famous. Go on - name five famous Belgians, not including Hercule Poirot because he is fictional.

Og

 

[SnoopDog]

- England and Germany will meet in the final of the World Championship in football 2006 and after an awesome game England will win the cup ..... on penalties. ( this one's for you Lou )

- the next US president will be a chubby black woman who's neither a Republican nor a Democrat

- Michael Moore will produce all of the Repulicans election tv spots

- in the next Superbowl half-time show Britney Spears will expose both her nipples OR O.J. Simpsons will come on stage announcing he's innocent

Snoopy

 

[oggbashan]

The US gets fed up with its politicians and votes to repeal the Declaration of Independence.

Princess Anne is appointed interim Queen of the United States. Her first executive act is to make all vehicles in California horse-drawn. That should bury LA and SF under piles of shit.

Og

 

[shereads]

Re: Least likely...

1. Margaret Thatcher is elected President of the US.

2. A German Jew is elected Secretary General of the UN.

3. Africa finds a cure for AIDS.

4. Monaco gets most medals at the Olympics.

5. Canada becomes the coolest place in the world to live.

6. Five Belgians become world famous. Go on - name five famous Belgians, not including Hercule Poirot because he is fictional.

Og

I'm with you on all but #5. Canada is looking better all the time.

Belgians...Hmm. They're the adorable little country that produces lace, aren't they?

 

[Guest]

That should bury LA and SF under piles of shit.

Not nice, Ogg. P.

(I do not own a car.)

 

[shereads]

George W. Bush and John McCain will hug in public. McCain will proclaim that GWB is a man of "moral clarity and courage."

No, wait...That happened last week.



Like the Bob Dylan/Victoria's Secret TV commercials, it's unlikely, but it happened anyway.

This isn't as easy as you'd think.

 

[oggbashan]

Not nice, Ogg. P.

(I do not own a car.)

But the two cities could grow great roses.

Og

Edited for PS: One Sunday morning in the 1930s my father noticed that the milkman's horse had deposited a load in the street on the boundary between my father's house and the vicarage.

My father intended to wait until the Vicar left for church before collecting the manure for his roses. He became worried as the hour got closer to the morning service.

He changed into his Sunday church-going suit and was poised with a shovel to collect the horse's bounty.

The Vicar, in full canonicals, beat him to it. My father still resented that sixty years later.

 

[Guest]

Snoopy: http://www.planetsmilies.com/smilies/mad/1/mad37.gif