The Gifts We Give

[A Desert Rose]

I had an interesting conversation with my Dom tonight. He told me that he wants to continue to find my limits and push me past them. He said he loves the feelings of power that he has with me and he referred to those feelings he has as "heady stuff." Then he asked me how I felt.

I told him I felt powerful, too. It is because of me that he can have those feelings of power and control. If I withdrew from him he would no longer have the satisfaction he feels now. (I am sure that eventually he would find another who could do for him what I do. He is handsome, charming and very intelligent.)

The relationship I have with him has many facets to it and I love them all. However, one of the things I love most is the gift of power we give each other. It is also, in my opinion, the greatest enigma of a D/s relationship.

Do you have any gifts that you give your Dom/me or sub and would like to share?

 

[Shadowsdream]

I give My slave the gift of *non guilt* (word?)
I do this in many ways and for many reasons...one example is when I insist he goes out partying with old friends he seldom gets to see. When I see that he is feeling a bit edgy I know that it is time for him to have a late wild night of hard rock or heavy metal, getting home at 4 in the morning. I will tell him that he MUST start making phone calls to find a partner in crime. I will even suggest certain women friends he has that I know he has a sexual turn on with and give him permission for a one night stand.
I make sure that he is dressed in a way that makes him feel wonderful and sexy.
As he is walking out of the door I grab him by the back of the neck, look deep into his eyes and in all seriousness instruct that he is not allowed any guilt and that he may not come home too early unless he phones Me with a very good excuse.
I free him of the guilt of My being at home and the flirtling he will be doing. I give him the gift of freedom that he will enjoy to the maximum because he knows it is My wish that he have a wonderful time.
WHY...
Because this *non guilt* night is like a rebirth a small lesson that there is no time in life to live in false guilts. That he is worth happiness and spontaneous joy without second guessing the insecurities of his partner.
When he gets home I wake up and allow him to share every moment of the wonderful evening he has had. I laugh with him and tease him gently until he falls asleep in a relaxed state of contentment.
The *non guilt* lesson is one I try to give My toy at least once a week in one way or another.

 

[Justina123]

Sir says that when he arrives at my place on Friday evening, as he does each week to stay until he leaves for work Monday morning, that he feels he is "home", that "home" is not his house but here with me. I have always worked at maing it that way...so that there is no "mine" and "yours" and he is not in any way a guest when here, which takes a whole combination of big and little actions and comments. It's something he comments on frequently and thanks me for.

Anyway....here's hoping his requested company transfer will come through and we can make it 24/7 instead of 24/3!


-justina

 

[Netzach]

Same as Shadowsdream. Non-guilt, realizing that you can just be, fuck what they think, to a degree anyway....

...and I've slowly taken by the hand someone totally closeted, totally scared about what others thought, and watched him come out...to parents, friends, siblings....

I've watched this person march at pride and not even blink when co-workers may have seen us...in full leathers.

(we're both ok with the possible fallout)

It's pretty amazing. I can't take all the credit but I take some of it.

 

[Ebonyfire]

I like that!

I give My slave the gift of *non guilt* (word?)
I do this in many ways and for many reasons...one example is when I insist he goes out partying with old friends he seldom gets to see. When I see that he is feeling a bit edgy I know that it is time for him to have a late wild night of hard rock or heavy metal, getting home at 4 in the morning. I will tell him that he MUST start making phone calls to find a partner in crime. I will even suggest certain women friends he has that I know he has a sexual turn on with and give him permission for a one night stand.
I make sure that he is dressed in a way that makes him feel wonderful and sexy.
As he is walking out of the door I grab him by the back of the neck, look deep into his eyes and in all seriousness instruct that he is not allowed any guilt and that he may not come home too early unless he phones Me with a very good excuse.
I free him of the guilt of My being at home and the flirtling he will be doing. I give him the gift of freedom that he will enjoy to the maximum because he knows it is My wish that he have a wonderful time.
WHY...
Because this *non guilt* night is like a rebirth a small lesson that there is no time in life to live in false guilts. That he is worth happiness and spontaneous joy without second guessing the insecurities of his partner.
When he gets home I wake up and allow him to share every moment of the wonderful evening he has had. I laugh with him and tease him gently until he falls asleep in a relaxed state of contentment.
The *non guilt* lesson is one I try to give My toy at least once a week in one way or another.

 

[Ebonyfire]

Freedom & Acceptance

I give my subs to freedom to be who they are and the acceptance of that person.

They have the freedom to tell me what is in their hearts and minds without censorship or the fear I will judge them.

 

[Etoile]

I give myself. It's pretty simple, really. It makes me endlessly happy that I can please Daddy by giving myself up as I do.

 

[Quint]

I see how much more T's confidence and self-assurance has grown since he truly accepted both his desires and the fact that I would fulfill any of them that he wants me to. It's a pretty big ego boost. For so long in his life, he has never allowed himself to believe that he would get something so good. That he *could* get it. Let alone that he could get it whenever he wanted it.

Now, as I watch him in other interactions with people, I notice that he carries this pride around with him everywhere. He's more secure in himself. He has come to terms with a lot of issues and turmoil since we began dating. I don't take credit for all of that, nor should I--it is he who had the strength to get past them. But I know how much I have helped.

 

[A Desert Rose]

I free him of the guilt of My being at home and the flirtling he will be doing. I give him the gift of freedom that he will enjoy to the maximum because he knows it is My wish that he have a wonderful time.
WHY...
Because this *non guilt* night is like a rebirth a small lesson that there is no time in life to live in false guilts. That he is worth happiness and spontaneous joy without second guessing the insecurities of his partner.

I little bit longer leash is a good thing. I think if one is tied down too tightly, they begin to resent and rebell, too. Lovely posts, thank you Shadows and Eb.

I give my subs to freedom to be who they are and the acceptance of that person.

They have the freedom to tell me what is in their hearts and minds without censorship or the fear I will judge them.

Originally posted by Justina123 ...that he feels he is "home", that "home" is not his house but here with me.[/B]

This is simply a beautiful post, Justina.

Originally posted by Quint Now, as I watch him in other interactions with people, I notice that he carries this pride around with him everywhere. He's more secure in himself. He has come to terms with a lot of issues and turmoil since we began dating. I don't take credit for all of that, nor should I--it is he who had the strength to get past them. But I know how much I have helped.[/B]

Quint, don't you feel more pride in yourself, too? I know I have developed more self assurance and pride since having known Him. Another gift we have given each other.



Thank you all for the lovely posts. They all made me think about my life and my relationships.

 

[A Desert Rose]

I give myself. It's pretty simple, really. It makes me endlessly happy that I can please Daddy by giving myself up as I do.

This is, of course the ulitmate gift. Thank you.

 

[Croctden]

Reverse

What I would say a sub gives me is calm. For whatever reason I find giving a spanking very relaxing. Sort of a living stress ball?

 

[A Desert Rose]

Re: Reverse

What I would say a sub gives me is calm. For whatever reason I find giving a spanking very relaxing. Sort of a living stress ball?

I am smiling at you. LOL

 

[quietwillow]

Consensual Power Exchange... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
WHAT A FEELING!

qw

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Reverse

What I would say a sub gives me is calm. For whatever reason I find giving a spanking very relaxing. Sort of a living stress ball?

Stress butt?