the edge

[sigsauerprinces]

lately it seems to be the only place i want to go. im not interested in a light spanking or mild bondage or a playful slap across the face. i want it hard, i want to go to the edge, i feel so :::alive::: when we play that way. there is no feeling like it. im in heaven when we do the stuff we're not "supposed" to do-knife play, rape roleplay, him slapping me so hard i have a mark on my face the next day. and the look in his eyes when we go there... :shivers: i could get lost in his eyes, theyre so beautiful and dark and intense. and im always so happy and giggly after those scenes, im on cloud 9, i swear.

anyone else relate?

 

[Kajira Callista]

lately it seems to be the only place i want to go. im not interested in a light spanking or mild bondage or a playful slap across the face. i want it hard, i want to go to the edge, i feel so :::alive::: when we play that way. there is no feeling like it. im in heaven when we do the stuff we're not "supposed" to do-knife play, rape roleplay, him slapping me so hard i have a mark on my face the next day. and the look in his eyes when we go there... :shivers: i could get lost in his eyes, theyre so beautiful and dark and intense. and im always so happy and giggly after those scenes, im on cloud 9, i swear.

anyone else relate?

Welcome fellow endorphin junkie!

 

[rosco rathbone]

Also, there's something you mentioned off hand..."the stuff we aren't supposed to do"....I remember the raw outlaw thrill when I first discovered extreme rough sexing back in the non-go go PC early nineties, with a partner whose friends were all about take back the night and what not. We used to walk around hand in hand and feel like we were the only people onto this huge magic secret----sex is better mean. Or, as I came to put it, "keep sex evil".

 

[Trylyan]

Yes, This is what I live for. I love it when me and my boy do this, he takes a good hard swing and hits me hard in the face, busting my nose, or lips.

Thats fun.

 

[ethereal~minx]

so many places I could post, "the edge" stops me. "the edge" nearly stops my breathing. "the edge" brings nearly everything I've ever thought it to mean to the front of my mind in a big whirlwind of confusion and fright and new beginnings.. it causes me to catch my breath in recollection of escaping the culpability of rape..

pushed to the edge, yes, I think I’m still high from the experience…I am okay with this not only because I consciously participated, but also because when the terror of the experience proved too much~ it was acknowledged without compromising the ‘scene’ ...

trust was gained & the experience was liberating...
nonetheless, I'm taking babysteps~~ I don't want to learn sooo fast anymore *please please please*

 

[catalina_francisco]

Yes, This is what I live for. I love it when me and my boy do this, he takes a good hard swing and hits me hard in the face, busting my nose, or lips.

Thats fun.

I'm into extreme edge play myself, but I'm not prepared to go to these lengths. All I can say is I hope in 5-10 years when your repeatedly busted nose and lips make your face vastly different and likely a turn off to most who view it that your partner has not moved on to fresh territory leaving you alone and lonely.

Catalina

 

[rosco rathbone]

I'm into extreme edge play myself, but I'm not prepared to go to these lengths. All I can say is I hope in 5-10 years when your repeatedly busted nose and lips make your face vastly different and likely a turn off to most who view it that your partner has not moved on to fresh territory leaving you alone and lonely.

Catalina

Heck, some people LIKE that busted-up look.

Just be careful with the backhanding; if you get the angle wrong you can break a nose.

 

[sigsauerprinces]

Kajira Callista- thanks for the welcome

roscoe-exactly. the rougher the better. the more intense, the more fun i feel sorry for couples who just do vanilla sex, i know thats kind of a snobby elitist attitude but its how i feel..there is so much stuff to do, and i mean you dont even have to be that hardcore to add a lot of fun to your sex life. i'd be miserable with just 30 mins of missionary position sex every night.

Trylyan -i dont judge others lifestyles (as long as its all over 18 and consensual), because lord knows i do a few things that certain ppl wouldnt approve of, even people within the bdsm community. it would just be seen as unsafe or edge play..but for me its what gets me off and makes me happy. however i dont like anything that causes permanent damage. i'd never want a broken nose or lip. do i like to be punched? yes, but on the cheek or side of the head where its not going to mess up anything..and lord knows he doesnt hit me full force, he'd probly knock me out if he did. so..do what thou will...just be careful.

catalina -i do tend to agree with what you said.


all that said..i still love the edge

 

[AnelizeDarkEyes]

do i like to be punched? yes, but on the cheek or side of the head where its not going to mess up anything..and lord knows he doesnt hit me full force, he'd probly knock me out if he did. so..do what thou will...just be careful.

catalina -i do tend to agree with what you said.


all that said..i still love the edge

Let me be perfectly clear here. I am in no way judging you for your edge play. I play out on the edge myself. However, that being said, from a medical perspective allowing your partner to punch you in the cheek and in the side of the head, is fairly dangerous. Particularly in the side of the head. Particularly if you do it repeatedly. Unless your partner is HIGHLY trained (as in stuntman type training) at pulling punches, it is doubtful, that the punches are being "pulled" enough to not cause damage.

There are lots of great places to get punches, besides your head. IMHO, it's alot to risk....and the face is a whole 'nother issue.

I don't post this to criticize YOU, but to let anyone new reading your post know that edgeplay involving punching to the head can cause brain injury.

My 2 cents.

~anelize

 

[sigsauerprinces]

Let me be perfectly clear here. I am in no way judging you for your edge play. I play out on the edge myself. However, that being said, from a medical perspective allowing your partner to punch you in the cheek and in the side of the head, is fairly dangerous. Particularly in the side of the head. Particularly if you do it repeatedly. Unless your partner is HIGHLY trained (as in stuntman type training) at pulling punches, it is doubtful, that the punches are being "pulled" enough to not cause damage.

There are lots of great places to get punches, besides your head. IMHO, it's alot to risk....and the face is a whole 'nother issue.

I don't post this to criticize YOU, but to let anyone new reading your post know that edgeplay involving punching to the head can cause brain injury.

My 2 cents.

~anelize

i totally understand what you're sayiing, and why you want newbies to know its dangerous. but its not like it happens a lot..my bf and i are not to the point of roughness that i really want yet, trust me. theyre not hard punches. just enough to feel it. and he gives me them to the body too and he's a bit harder there. it sounds a lot more dramatic than it actually is. i just like it when he hits me with a closed fist sometimes instead of an open hand because its just more intense. trust me, i dont want to end up like muhamed ali someday (bless his soul). we're careful.

 

[catalina_francisco]

i totally understand what you're sayiing, and why you want newbies to know its dangerous. but its not like it happens a lot..my bf and i are not to the point of roughness that i really want yet, trust me. theyre not hard punches. just enough to feel it. and he gives me them to the body too and he's a bit harder there. it sounds a lot more dramatic than it actually is. i just like it when he hits me with a closed fist sometimes instead of an open hand because its just more intense. trust me, i dont want to end up like muhamed ali someday (bless his soul). we're careful.

I personally think you are minimising the risk for whatever reason. Brain damage does not need the repeated blows received as a professional boxer, nor does it need more than one misplaced punch to the head no matter how careful you might be thinking you both are. Do some reading on head injury, the delicacy of that part of your body, talk to someone who is a medical doctor about realities, get a dose of realism and self preservation and then play in an informed way which will not risk your becoming the vegetable you so very well could. My suggestion would be to do a lot of self educating about various types of play involving impact to specific body parts, especially head, spine, and vital organs, then engage in edge play. One mistake is all it takes.

Catalina

 

[sigsauerprinces]

I personally think you are minimising the risk for whatever reason. Brain damage does not need the repeated blows received as a professional boxer, nor does it need more than one misplaced punch to the head no matter how careful you might be thinking you both are. Do some reading on head injury, the delicacy of that part of your body, talk to someone who is a medical doctor about realities, get a dose of realism and self preservation and then play in an informed way which will not risk your becoming the vegetable you so very well could. My suggestion would be to do a lot of self educating about various types of play involving impact to specific body parts, especially head, spine, and vital organs, then engage in edge play. One mistake is all it takes.

Catalina

you're entitled to your opinon. ive already explained myself, and made my points clear. if you dont want to listen to anything i've said, then thats obviously up to you. but it is my life and my body, and i'll do with it what i choose.

 

[catalina_francisco]

you're entitled to your opinon. ive already explained myself, and made my points clear. if you dont want to listen to anything i've said, then thats obviously up to you. but it is my life and my body, and i'll do with it what i choose.

Just genuinely concerned for someone who has similar interests to my own, but maybe it seems not the awareness which is required to ensure you stay as you express you wish to. There are plenty of people in this world who have regretted uninformed choices once it is too late and irreversible. But that is OK, if you do not come to the forum to learn and take advantage of well intended factual information given as part of the community friendliness others welcome, that is your choice. Good luck.

Catalina

 

[sigsauerprinces]

Just genuinely concerned for someone who has similar interests to my own, but maybe it seems not the awareness which is required to ensure you stay as you express you wish to. There are plenty of people in this world who have regretted uninformed choices once it is too late and irreversible. But that is OK, if you do not come to the forum to learn and take advantage of well intended factual information given as part of the community friendliness others welcome, that is your choice. Good luck.

Catalina

hun i have plenty of awareness. because i do not believe the same things that you do, or have the same opinion that do you about certain types of play, does not mean i am "less aware" than you. you seem to enjoy playing the "above it all know it all sub who's soooo worried about her fellow subbies welfare". if you honestly were just concerned with my welfare, fine-ONE post informing me that you didnt think my play was safe would be more than adequate. you posted that you didnt think my play was safe, and that you wanted newbies to know that type of play is dangerous. i replied, quite graciously, that i understood your fears, and told you that we take precautions and do not play at a level that can cause harm.. but not only did you make more than one post, you blatantly ignored the content of my reply to you, in which i explained to you that I AM NOT HIT HARD ENOUGH TO CAUSE HARM. are you here in my house when he hits me? no you are not. so you do not know what goes on in my union. make sense?

do you have control issues? it seems to really irk you that i dont suddenly say "oh ok catalina, im wrong and you're right". we have differing opinions. thats it.

"But that is OK, if you do not come to the forum to learn and take advantage of well intended factual information given as part of the community friendliness others welcome, that is your choice."

could you be any more self righteous? guess what-people are going to disagree with you in life. because i disagree with you ON THIS SUBJECT does not mean i am not here to learn from others and grow.

hopefully your lecture is over, because frankly this thread was meant to be an appreciation of edge play, which is wonderful, and not a debate about which play is safe and which isnt.

*****

a really cool guy i met on here (you know who you are, and you rock) told me last night "and besides, S&M and edge play is so fucking ROMANTIC" and i thought god you are so totally right. it IS romantic. theres nothing like a hard slap (or punch ) to the face, and then a loving caress, staring deep into his eyes as his hand caresses my face. hard, soft...hard, soft. heaven.

 

[ownedsubgal]

sigsauerprinces...hello

although pain is not directly pleasurable for me, i can relate to wanting to experience more and more extremes. for me, it's the desire i have for him to allow himself to release completely, on my body...i do not want him to hold back at all. although this will probably never happen (a complete letting go, no holds barred), it feels good when he lets go more than usual.

Daddy punches me as well...although previously, it was a limit of his not to punch my face/head, he has recently lifted that, he is just careful where he strikes and how hard. to me nothing at all is ugly about having black eyes or swollen and torn lips from my Master's hands. they are all precious gifts of love, between us. like a love note, that i can read anytime, just by touching the wounds or looking in the mirror. it makes me feel good. it makes him feel good. and that is what matters anyway right? that you are both doing what makes you feel whole/right inside. it doesn't sound like your Master is just striking you willy nilly, with no thought or care for any potential damage that may be caused to you. so, enjoy each other.

and yes...the jump between hard, cruel blow to soft, tender caress, then another blow....that drives me crazy. makes my heart just want to burst out of my chest with adoration for him.

 

[Pure]

Hi sigsauerprincess

Your postings are well put and intriguing.

you said in part

SSP: lord knows i do a few things that certain ppl wouldnt approve of, even people within the bdsm community. it would just be seen as unsafe or edge play..but for me its what gets me off and makes me happy. however i dont like anything that causes permanent damage. i'd never want a broken nose or lip. do i like to be punched? yes, but on the cheek or side of the head where its not going to mess up anything..

SSP: but it is my life and my body, and i'll do with it what i choose.

Catalina replied in part: "But that is OK, if you do not come to the forum to learn and take advantage of well intended factual information given as part of the community friendliness others welcome, that is your choice."

And you replied to that, part suggesting that yes, you are 'here' to learn, which I have no reason to dispute.

If you're aware of the dangers of some kinds of head blows, as Anelize has stated, that seems to be sufficient information dispensed.

Some ski, some ride motorcycles, or bungee jump or skydive. Some practice deep dives in the ocean, of several minutes, with no added breathing apparatus.

I further agree with your point that you, more than others, may be in the best position to judge dangers, and, for example, the force of blows, etc.

It appears you're not to be controlled(directed, influenced) by efforts, no matter how well meaning. There is certainly an issue of control, here. A forum does well to allow, even encourage honest statements about leanings and practices. No one loses by that.

(Might others be 'encouraged' (into danger)? I see no reason to assume that.)

A perhaps extreme example of the the issue of "whose life is it?"
I wonder if you, or your 'advisors' here, have seen the film "Leaving Las Vegas" with Nicholas Cage? The man, an alcoholic, has decided to die; the woman, played by Shue, accepts that. It's simply a story, not an Oprah 'rescue and therapy saga'.

If you are drawn to suffering, I hope you continue to express and explore it. (e.g., the book, _A taste for suffering_ by Maria Marcus) I'd encourage you also to consider the mind and imagination. A body so readily becomes numb, and the third or fourth blow already loses in painful impact. But the body may be your chosen 'medium' in which to suffer. That's your choice.

best,
pure

 

[rosco rathbone]

Anyone seen that Japanese porn school of images which is all shots of beautiful young women, glamorously dressed, in public on the arm of older men or sitting at fancy restraunt tables with them, sipping champane, or in passenger seat of alpha romeos and jaguars etc etc, you get the picture----except that in every image, they (the women) have major black eyes, split lips, and what have you, as if they had just had the shit beaten out of them behind closed doors and then dressed for dinner..... great stuff.

 

[catalina_francisco]

If you do not want to read a rant or read a lecture pass on, skip this post. If you are not open for sincere concern pass on skip this post, if you decide to not skip it be warned I take full responsibility for my words and if you are insulted by it I do not care.

I am an edge player, I do breath play, cutting, I use a bullwhip, I have on regular occasion with different partners drawn blood with my whipping and spanking and caning. I enjoy giving pain and sometimes it feels as if the more I give the better, there seems to be almost no limit to the amount of pain I am willing to give and the amount of pain I enjoy giving.

But I do have limits, I happen to think that it is better not to cripple your partner, this is of course not only out of an altruistic notion but also purely out of a selfish one. It takes time and effort to find a good partner and it takes time to train a submissive/ slave. It is such a waste if I misplace that investment, also there is this little thing called the law and you know what, even with BDSM being legal in the Netherlands (yes I know we are Sodom and Gomorrah combined into one nice package) if I put my partner in the hospital I could be prosecuted and put into jail, which although I am bi-curious and could be interesting on some levels is a place I rather avoid.

It is a good thing when we talk about edge play to be careful in what we say and how we say it. We need to make clear of the safety rules to follow. It is important not to take things personal and not to become too defensive about it. If you do edge play there are areas which we should avoid and which we should not partake in. Education about what we do and how we do it is important, self delusion/denial is the first step into becoming a corpse or even worse a vegetable. In my daily job I deal with risk and risk management, it is impossible to avoid all risk in life and it is especially impossible for us who do edge play. But taking risks is not the problem; it is being aware of them and trying to avoid them to the best of your ability.

For example if you and your partner have an urge to take a sledgehammer and start hitting each other, there is a real risk to break a couple of bones. If you happen to hit a head, there might be a risk of some quite severe brain damage. However it could of course be argued that if you take a sledgehammer to someone’s head you probably already have some brain damage.

My point in all of this, if you do edge play and do not get yourself informed and delude yourself into thinking there is no risk worth thinking about, you must already have brain damage.

Last point; please think about this, if you happen to be a great proclaimer of edge play and do not warn others of the risks, I hope you do not mind living with a death or two on your conscience because that could be one of the consequences.

Francisco.

 

[rosco rathbone]

"Last point; please think about this, if you happen to be a great proclaimer of edge play and do not warn others of the risks, I hope you do not mind living with a death or two on your conscience because that could be one of the consequences."

Come now sir, this is bologna.

I am into edgeplay, including use of fists, and while I wouldn't exactly call myself a "great proclaimer"; I'm also not going to lose a minute of sleep over the consequences of the actions of idiots.

Catalina's original scolding post to SSP was completely irritating and she got checked for it.

And now for a replay of the "catalina vs world" brouhaha of last summer.....going live to you, Pure....

 

[catalina_francisco]

"Last point; please think about this, if you happen to be a great proclaimer of edge play and do not warn others of the risks, I hope you do not mind living with a death or two on your conscience because that could be one of the consequences."

Come now sir, this is bologna.

MY dear rosco rathbone,

Like I said in the beginning of my post don't like it don't read it, and I happen to like bologna.

But if you are up for a nice match of discussing nonsense, I would say a brave man picks up the glove and does not pass it on.

And by the way RR I hope you pick up the glove, it has been a bit boring lately and I so enjoy a good row.

Francisco.

 

[rosco rathbone]

My good fellow, there is simply nothing to row about. My "passing the glove" was meant in good fun....sarcastically as it were.

With all due respect to your sense of responsibility for clueless edgeplayers aka drunk drivers; your wife was checked fair and square for behaviour most irritating..... my post was intended to let the ssp know that she wasn't the only one who thought your lady was out of line. All a matter of style I suppose.

dixit

 

[Pure]

Francisco said, in part,

My point in all of this, if you do edge play and do not get yourself informed and delude yourself into thinking there is no risk worth thinking about, you must already have brain damage.

It's unclear who you are suggesting is not getting informed and/or is deluded. Do you intend to apply this to sigsauerpr?

Last point; please think about this, if you happen to be a great proclaimer of edge play and do not warn others of the risks,

It's unclear who you think is 'proclaiming' edge play? I've seen a couple _descriptions_, which might be 'enthusiastic', but I've not seen _promoting_, or saying 'do it my way' --at least from those it appears you might be criticizing.

Incidentally, 'edge play' in the sense of risk to life and limb, is not a central concept of the cruel or sadistic encounters I've described or discussed in a number of places, including the Topopolis or SMACK thread.

I hope you do not mind living with a death or two on your conscience because that could be one of the consequences.

Again, unclear whom you're addressing. A number of accurate warnings about head blows have appeared in this thread. One must assume sigsauer can comprehend it.

There's no reason to allege (if you're doing that) that anyone conversing with her who refuses to issue further warnings and advice is going to incur eternal guilt, damnation, and other goodies for the bad guys, according to the Catholic cosmology.

As for your later invite to a "row." I find your position far too unclear to admit debate. It appears more a series of rhetorical maneuvers and innuendos to make those who disagree look foolish or reckless.

Rather than 'glove to glove', I envision being asked "Why is it you want to tell readers at the forum that it's great for people like SSP to be maimed and turned into vegetables?"

regards,
'pure'

 

[Pure]

A Dialogue for the Titillation of Readers"

"The Edge"

[Speaker 1] "Here's my edge play, doing X. I love X"

[Speaker 2] "That's not edge play, that's crazy. Here's what safe edge play is like, the real edge play; what I do."

"I wouldn't feel at all at the 'edge' if I was so safe as you specify."

"Then you don't know where the 'edge' is!"

"Where am I then?"

"You're at the border of foolish self-destruction, even insanity."

"Thanks. And where are you, Wise One."

"At the true edge, the safe edge, as I'd said. Are you braindamaged or something?"

"Maybe... in your book."

"So what are you going to do?"

"?"

"Are you going to keep up your craziness?"

"As I said, 'Here's my edge play... I love X."

"You are dangerous!"

"I guess."

"Others be warned!"

"OK."

"Let us help you!"

"No thanks."

 

[catalina_francisco]

As the saying goes, ignorance is bliss..or is it?

 

[Quint]

As the saying goes, ignorance is bliss..or is it?

Applied to what and/or to whom? SSP has repeatedly said that she is aware of whatever risk she and her partner incur on her; either believe her or don't, but you aren't going to convince anyone else that you know better than she about her own life. I can't imagine who else you might be trying to proclaim ignorant on this thread.

There are essentially two different types of threads. One is the descriptive "I'm thinking about X action/technique/quality. Want to talk about it?" The other is the normative "I'm thinking about X action/technique/quality. What should I do?"

Consider: 1.) "So I think I'm going to commit adultery on my spouse because my sexual needs are unfulfilled. What are some effective ways to do this?" This does not invite moral opinions or judgments, merely techniques and perhaps experiences as a means to what has worked/not worked in the past.
2.) "So I think I'm going to commit adultery on my spouse because my sexual needs are unfulfilled. However, I'm not sure if I should do this. What do you think?" This does ask for moral opinions, warnings, naysayers, yeasayers, and High Holy Judgment.

This particular thread was begun with none of the "ought" in it. This does not mean that, as a tangent, the "ought" cannot be discussed. But to beat the "ought" into the ground when it was not the original purpose of the thread is not just distracting, it's insulting. I would think that one clear warning of potential damage would be enough for anyone who can read and after that, I think it's perfectly understandable that the object of the lecturing--for so it becomes--would close her ears. Belaboring the point is not going to make it any clearer. Either people will read the first advice and take note, or they will not read any of the warnings. Responsibility absolved.