The Devil's Handiwork

[bluntforcemama]

Idle hands, yes. Yesterday I got a credit card offer in the mail, and they always send those business reply postage-paid envelopes. Well, the cat needed to be brushed, so I took all the discarded hair, stuck it in the envelope, and sent it back to American Express. I need to think of more interesting things to do with unwanted mail. Any suggestions?

 

[MissTaken]

Well, Myst.

You might have been generous enough to toss some coupons from Ed McMahon, a few pages from other credit card offers and your "box rent due" notice in with the returned mail.

 

[James G 5]

your "box rent due" notice

Myst rents her box?????

Do I have to fill out a tennant's application or something???

 

[navarre]

Some tips from Andy Rooney

When you get “ads” enclosed with your phone or utility bill, return these “ads” with your payment. Let the sending companies throw their own junk mail away. When you get those “pre-approved” letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and similar type junk. Do not throw away the return envelope. Most of these come with postage-paid return envelopes, right? It costs them more than the regular 37 cents postage “IF” and when they receive them back. It costs them nothing if you throw them away! The postage was around 50 cents before! The last increase and it is according to the weight. In that case, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it in these cool little, postage-paid return envelopes.


Send an ad for your local chimney cleaner to American Express. Send a pizza coupon to Citibank. If you didn’t get anything else that day, then just send them their blank application back! If you want to remain anonymous, just make sure your name isn’t on anything you send them. You can even send the envelope back empty if you want to just to keep them guessing! Eventually, the banks and credit card companies will be getting their own junk back in the mail. Let’s let them know what it’s like to get lots of junk mail, and best of all they’re paying for it...Twice! Let’s help keep our postal service busy since they are saying that e-mail is cutting into their business profits, and that’s why they need to increase postage costs again. You get the idea! If enough people follow these tips, it will work---- I have been doing this for years, and I get very little junk mail anymore.

 

[bluntforcemama]

Those are some good tips, Navarre. Recently I bought a shredder (after having my identity stolen), so I'm thinking of shredding random things and sticking them back in the envelope, but it just doesn't seem as creative as cat fur. Maybe I'll clean out the vacuum bag.

 

[Kajira Callista]

Those are some good tips, Navarre. Recently I bought a shredder (after having my identity stolen), so I'm thinking of shredding random things and sticking them back in the envelope, but it just doesn't seem as creative as cat fur. Maybe I'll clean out the vacuum bag.

or the litter box

 

[SweetDommes]

or the litter box

Ok, I was amused until I hit this one ... what about all of the other poor people who have important mail that gets stuck next to that one ... blech ...

I'm all for the cat fur though ... with 4 cats, one of them a longhair, plus a dog ... we have plenty of furballs to collect

 

[SkyBluAngelEyes]

or the litter box

lumpy mail

 

[incubus'_sub]

Good idea.... our vacuum bag usually contains a number of large, furry, sucked up & angry SPIDERS hehehe

 

[James G 5]

People. I am SORELY dissapointed.

You're supposed to be PERVERTS.

Don't you need somewhere creative to dispose of used condoms, rubber gloves, dental dams, etc?





Note, this is intended as HUMOR...before someone says something, yes I am aware that sending those sort of potentially biologically contaminated items is a crime

 

[SweetDommes]

People. I am SORELY dissapointed.

You're supposed to be PERVERTS.

Don't you need somewhere creative to dispose of used condoms, rubber gloves, dental dams, etc?





Note, this is intended as HUMOR...before someone says something, yes I am aware that sending those sort of potentially biologically contaminated items is a crime

Actually, if you happen to have biohazard bags, and seal said items inside one before putting it in the envelope (or even use a ziplock bag labled "biohazardous material") it's not all that bad ... and it's not like they can track it back as long as you don't put your name on it

Hey, I'm not endorsing it ... but there are ways .....

 

[James G 5]

Actually, if you happen to have biohazard bags, and seal said items inside one before putting it in the envelope (or even use a ziplock bag labled "biohazardous material") it's not all that bad ... and it's not like they can track it back as long as you don't put your name on it

Hey, I'm not endorsing it ... but there are ways .....

ROFL
Ok...I still wouldn't risk it

But I like the way you think

SMRITSG, I guess

 

[SkyBluAngelEyes]

People. I am SORELY dissapointed.

You're supposed to be PERVERTS.

Don't you need somewhere creative to dispose of used condoms, rubber gloves, dental dams, etc?

I literally laughed out loud at this one.

 

[bluntforcemama]

People. I am SORELY dissapointed.

You're supposed to be PERVERTS.

Don't you need somewhere creative to dispose of used condoms, rubber gloves, dental dams, etc?

There is a fine line between being perverted and disgusting.

 

[James G 5]

There is a fine line between being perverted and disgusting.

And I'm like the Hedwig of that line

Lit's own Jon Waters, that's me!

 

[WriterDom]

Where is myst anyway?

 

[graceanne]

Good idea.... our vacuum bag usually contains a number of large, furry, sucked up & angry SPIDERS hehehe

LOL OMG the mental picture. Some chick, paid to open mail, just doing her job, bored to death. Then she open's one, and a big, furry spider falls out onto her lap! OMG Talk about hilarious. I'd want to be a fly on the wall for that!

 

[shy slave]

or the litter box

The idea of this amused as it would give lumpy mail, as SkyBluAngelEyes said.

The reality may be they have it checked out in case its anthrax/bomb/etc can you imagine the fuss all for cat litter!!!