The collar

I have a really wild collar trimmed out in chrome plate, that I wear for other people if they happen to not have one for the occasion. it's kind of a compliment to my top-- "Look how good a top you are, I wear this for you!" I do not put it on anyone else.

I have a chain collar, and a really sexy dog collar for my bottoms, if the scene dictates such.
God,that sounds so sexy. The reason I have an interest in bdsm at all really.
 
I had one collared to me for multiple years, and that was about everything to me.

it ended around two years ago...

At some point, I hope to find another that I will connect to another and place the collar. To me that is the ultimate symbol of devotion.
 
The atmosphere in this forum tends toward the hopelessly romantic :heart::heart::heart:
Yeah, I like the romantic aspect, too. :D Of course, I can fully support this collaring idea, unlike marriage. (I don't have a problem with the commitment to each other thing. It's the legal aspect that's the issue, since relationships should be 100% up to the people involved.)
 
I've really only used them in play, and have enjoyed muchly. Handy attachment point and breathplay enabler, etc.

On further reflection, I tend to view jewellry and other gifts the way some people view collars. My ex gave me a a few very nice pieces, because I had no jewellry to speak of at all at that time. Since we broke up, I've barely worn any of it, but I refuse to part with it. Other things he's given me I still use all the time, including a stuffed bear, because now, I can't sleep without him because I feel all uneven.

Mister and I did discuss it a while back, but at that time we couldn't find exactly what we wanted, and life kept on happening, so it fell by the way side. As we start heading towards winding things up, I find myself wanting something like that more, as something tangible to hold onto. So it's probably a good thing I don't have it.
 
I would just not want someone to see me in a collar and get all pink hearts and sparkly stars about it.

I'd rather they see me in a collar and hope like hell someone really strong has a grip on my leash... :devil:
 
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When I see someone wearing a collar, I either assume that they're a young person who's into the whole goth getup thing, or that they're a person who's into cultural BDSM.

Personally I dislike collars, and would never permit a partner to wear one. I am aroused by the appearance of an exposed female neck.

I know that people are fond of equating collars with submission, but I've spent far too much time around dogs to consider that a fitting symbol for voluntary deference. A devoted and obedient dog will come when you call, every single time, as long as he is in earshot. In contrast, a dog, who in his heart does not really submit to your authority, needs a collar and leash to be guided.
 
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Like Lizzie B, i've only used in play and then it's usually more for function, sometimes for fun.

I was on a first date recently and he asked if I'd ever been collared and I said no. Why? he asked. Had I never been properly trained? Had no one ever found me useful enough to collar me?

What gets me the most was automatic assumption that an actual collar is the proverbial prize. That without having a collar, I was never worth much.

After a short discussion about real life, symbolism and usefulness, I got up and left. (That, the fact he smelled like cheetos and told me I had the hands of a fat woman prompted me to leave)

Tattoo? Jewelry? Collar? To each his own on what collaring means. There have been some really personal replies here. Ultimately, it's about the relationship and what the two involved decide.
 
In contrast, a dog, who in his heart does not really submit to your authority, needs a collar and leash to be guided.
LOL that's my motivation in a nutshell!

Kittencandy, you are awesome.

*note to self; Doms do not eat cheetoes before a date*
 
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I thought as much! :)
Griffin stood with her back to one of the wooden pillars; her collar was securely padlocked to a chain wrapped around it. A thick black cock harnessed her hips. A pit-bull on a short leash; Griff’s favorite description of a willful bottom she once had. Well, that’s what she would be for Trish. A devoted pit-bull. Her Mistress was talking to a little group across the room. She pulled against her collar; it was, wonderfully, not going to give way to her desire to be at Trish's side.

A young lady tsk-ed about the choke hazard of a collar and leash used that way. Griffin sneered out loud. Novices, she said, were entirely welcome to interfere in her scenes, provided they were willing to learn a thing or two. Then, thrusting her hips at the girl, she invited her to climb aboard for a ride to ecstasy. The novice’s friends came to the rescue, and Trish, as Griff had hoped, strode back to deal with her. She stood to attention, hurriedly put her hands behind her back.

The Baroness said she did not approve of that kind of impertinence; but the sparkle in Trish’s eye told a different story. The Baroness’s boy had better remember who she belonged to. The Baroness gripped her by her black silicone cock, and reminded her jaw with a series of sweet, stinging slaps, that made Griffin blink, seeing her Mistress through a soft, hazy filter. If she couldn’t control her mouth, a gag would control it for her. Whose cock was it? M’am, yours, M’am. My property is not allowed to scare novices, let it be understood. Damn. Of course, M’am.

http://stellaomega.probablepossible.com/oak-and-ash/the-baronesss-boy/
 
I guess that would be sexy to set an initaial
theme. It's starting to get me hotter and hotter
the more I think about such things. You have an idea there....
I never thought about cages before. Theres possibilities...

How about cages? :cattail:
 
Like Lizzie B, i've only used in play and then it's usually more for function, sometimes for fun.

I was on a first date recently and he asked if I'd ever been collared and I said no. Why? he asked. Had I never been properly trained? Had no one ever found me useful enough to collar me?

What gets me the most was automatic assumption that an actual collar is the proverbial prize. That without having a collar, I was never worth much.

After a short discussion about real life, symbolism and usefulness, I got up and left. (That, the fact he smelled like cheetos and told me I had the hands of a fat woman prompted me to leave)

Tattoo? Jewelry? Collar? To each his own on what collaring means. There have been some really personal replies here. Ultimately, it's about the relationship and what the two involved decide.

Good for you kitten! Doesn't sound like much of a dom to me Too many think sub = doormat. But it's always entertaining to disabuse them of that notion.
 
When I see someone wearing a collar, I either assume that they're a young person who's into the whole goth getup thing, or that they're a person who's into cultural BDSM.

Personally I dislike collars, and would never permit a partner to wear one. I am aroused by the appearance of an exposed female neck.

I know that people are fond of equating collars with submission, but I've spent far too much time around dogs to consider that a fitting symbol for voluntary deference. A devoted and obedient dog will come when you call, every single time, as long as he is in earshot. In contrast, a dog, who in his heart does not really submit to your authority, needs a collar and leash to be guided.

Aaaaand I just realized you totally describes a more esoteric part of why I tend to be more of a "stay still; this is going to hurt" sort of person, than "here let me tie you up in pretty ropes because this is going to hurt" sort of person. Because hi, I'm with you - why do we need an overt stereotypical symbol to recognize it?

Although I will recognize that AA described a necklace design years ago [passing for collar] that made sense (although I can't find the post and am too tired to look further) - very delicate and fragile looking, but made of titanium or something similar for strength; interlocking triangles or something so that even the most gentle tug from tangling in one's hair would cause some discomfort [and act as a reminder of the person who gave it].
 
Aaaaand I just realized you totally describes a more esoteric part of why I tend to be more of a "stay still; this is going to hurt" sort of person, than "here let me tie you up in pretty ropes because this is going to hurt" sort of person. Because hi, I'm with you - why do we need an overt stereotypical symbol to recognize it?
insight after insight! because of course, I'm most likely to be behind door number two there...
 
I've really only used them in play, and have enjoyed muchly. Handy attachment point and breathplay enabler, etc.

We used one as part of scenes, but social consciousness (i.e. the vanillas) petty much eliminated it as a day to day thing. Not that it really fits.

One friend who is a sub/painslut wear's hers all the time; as others have said, it is more a indication of what she likes in life and that she is in control of her own power (moreso than a slave) and free to give it to whom she likes, than it is an indicator that she is somebody's sub. It has become an accessory, but with meaning.


Another acquaintance uses them to mark her subs if it fits the person. Humiliation, ownership, part of the scene, whatever she thinks is called for.
 
Although I will recognize that AA described a necklace design years ago [passing for collar] that made sense (although I can't find the post and am too tired to look further) - very delicate and fragile looking, but made of titanium or something similar for strength; interlocking triangles or something so that even the most gentle tug from tangling in one's hair would cause some discomfort [and act as a reminder of the person who gave it].
Subtly fiendish!
 
The prettiest collar, is the invisible collar.

You can feel it, but you cannot see it.
 
When I see someone wearing a collar, I either assume that they're a young person who's into the whole goth getup thing, or that they're a person who's into cultural BDSM.

Personally I dislike collars, and would never permit a partner to wear one. I am aroused by the appearance of an exposed female neck.

I know that people are fond of equating collars with submission, but I've spent far too much time around dogs to consider that a fitting symbol for voluntary deference. A devoted and obedient dog will come when you call, every single time, as long as he is in earshot. In contrast, a dog, who in his heart does not really submit to your authority, needs a collar and leash to be guided.


I've been wearing mine for about a month or so now, to see if it holds up to everyday use and to gauge how comfortable it is. I doubt anyone thinks I'm a goth and the other comments I get are along the lines of it being a nice bit of jewellery and can they have one.

I'm not sure I'd like the idea of being analogous with a dog, obedient or otherwise.
 
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