The Blacksmith's Apprentice [M/M] - CLOSED

[grdybiwife]

"Hey Lucan," Averey yelled out over the den of the busy tavern. The market was just closing up and most of the village stopped in for an ale or two on their way home. Averey stood at the end of the bar and watched the panic wash over Lucan. He grabbed their ales and thrust one into the boys hand with a huge grin. "What are you doing over here all alone?" He asked as he slung his arm around the smaller boys neck. In more hushed tones he said, "I didn't mean to leave you like that. I thought you were right behind me. I'm sorry friend."

As they went along Averey went about introducing Lucan to his tavern buddies, many of whom already knew of the obnoxious Brecker boy but none where rude. "Any friend of Averey's is a friend of mine," was a common greeting once names were exchanged, coupled with a firm handshake and a pat on the back. Averey just hoped Lucan would feel welcome enough to come around more often.

Before today, Averey never saw a time when Lucan and he would share an ale. Never thought he would share an ale with anyone aside from Papa and Da but things were changing now. Having the other boy around seemed to open him up that much more. His Papa noticed with a smile and waved them over. Of course Averey dragged Lucan over to make this very special introduction.

"Papa, meet Lucan Brecker. Lucan meet my Papa, Ralf Inman," the boy said by way of introduction and offered his hand to the smaller boy who took it timidly. Ralf didn't squeeze as he normally would, for fear he might hurt the frail boy but he still shook it as he would a man.

"Good to meet you boy," he said with a smile as warm as Cecily's. "I hope my dolt of a grandson didn't slow you down too bad today," he added teasingly and gave Averey a playful cuff before he went to deal with a customer. "I know your Ma said one but I can't tell what I can't see," he said with a wink and moved along down the bar.

 

[tamgreen]

Lucan felt a flood of warmth as Averey's strong arm hooked around his neck, and an even sweeter rush as he called him "friend". Even in such an intimidating place as this, he felt so safe at Averey's side, it wasn't long before he was smiling easily and shaking hands as he clutched his mug as if he drank ale here all the time. He was surprised how friendly everyone was here, and they seemed to accept him more as an equal than his papa ever did.

He was confused to hear Averey speaking of "Papa", but he realized soon that this was what he called his grandfather. It seemed like a sweet and wonderful thing, the family dynamic Averey had here at the inn, and Lucan felt all the worse for ever having teased.

Lucan sat next to Averey and grinned so hard his cheeks were beginning to ache. He gulped at his ale, feeling almost like a real adult. The ale was helping him relax a little, and he finally leaned close to Averey, almost setting his chin on the other boy's shoulder. His expression was serious now, his pale blue eyes wide and sweetly sincere.

"Would you forgive me," he began, just loud enough for only Averey to hear, "for being so beastly to you? I know I've been awful... not just this morning, but... a long, long time. It makes me sad to think we went all this time not being friends. And I know it's my fault. I'm sorry, Averey. For everything. I'm sorry for... my whole entire life."

 

[grdybiwife]

"Ahh it's in the past," Averey said of Lucan's apology. He could feel his breath on his neck, his face so close. Averey glanced down at him and smile as he ruffled that bright red hair. He was so adorable, even when he was a bumbling mess or a horse's ass. It didn't matter, Averey was definitely smitten with the Breck boy. He knew that could make his life at the smithy a little difficult but he wouldn't run from it. It wouldn't be the first time he had to tuck away his true feelings, certainly not the last. He would settle for friendship, in his mind that was all he could do.

"We were boys then, now we're men. Consider it water under the bridge. Besides, it's not the first time I've heard such things and probably not the last," Averey said with a shrug. He would forgive the boy, he already had, but it was nice to hear the words. To see the sincerity in Lucan's eyes made his heart warm. "Just promise next time you have a problem with me you leave my Ma out of it, else I give you a proper bruising," Averey said with a playful fist to the boys thin chin.

His mug empty Averey lean over the bar and grabbed a decanter of ale. With a wink at Lucan, he put his finger to his lips and refilled their tankards before he slipped it back into place. "If you wanted, you could stay for supper. Ma sings sometimes, she ain't so good but after a few ales the men think she's as good as any minstrel they've seen."

 

[tamgreen]

Lucan hung his head a little at the comment about his ma. He felt extra-bad about speaking badly of Averey's mother, and the mention of it made him flush all over again, even if Averey was joking around with him now. Never, he promised himself, would he shoot his mouth off like that again. Not ever. The shame at his own stupidity for insulting a good woman would be a thousand times worse than any bruising Averey's strong fists could administer.

He managed to smile again when Averey filled their tankards. Lucan was usually careful about ale, knowing his mother and father always impressed temperance upon him - he was clumsy and foolish enough without being tipsy - but the good cheer of the inn and the unexpected gleeful pleasure of Averey's friendship loosened him up a lot. He drank deeply and gave his compatriot a wide, wet-lipped, conspiratorial grin.

"I'd love to stay!" he gushed, not caring a whit about getting back home now. "I bet your ma cooks real nicely. And I bet she sings just fine. She's a real fine lady, your ma." Lucan hunched down, propping his arm on the bar and resting his head on it briefly, partially covering his boyish face and the bashful smile that had suddenly sprouted there. "I like to sing too," he whispered loudly, as if it were any secret. "But I'm not so good either!"

 

[grdybiwife]

"Then you have to sing with her. She'd love it," Averey said just as excited. Just as he said it, his mother appeared behind the bar working a mortar and pestle. She came straight over to the boys and narrowed her eyes at them both. Averey immediately dropped his eyes and she messed his hair.

"I guess it's about time you disobey, seeing as your a man and all," she said with a smile. "But don't make it a habit. Come little one let me look at that eye." She took Lucan's face in her hands and held it up to look closely at his bruises. Cecily took a globe of the herbal paste and applied it gently to his face.

"Ma is it okay if Lucan stays for supper," Averey asked, only as a formality. He knew his mother wouldn't turn him away. She was too glad to have her boy in the company of one his own age.

"He's more than welcome. It's a good night to be here. The jugglers have come to stay tonight. And I swear I saw a lute among them as well. It will be a ruckus for the pious ones to complain about," she said with a laugh as she turned to leave the boys.

"Did you hear that Lucan. Jugglers and musicians. It's a good thing we made friends, else you might have missed the fun," Averey said with a playful shove that turned into a sort of half hug.

 

[tamgreen]

Filled with joy, Lucan laughed freely and kicked his legs with glee. He continued to drink thirstily from his ale. Bright spots of colour bloomed in his cheeks, a result of the drink, the levity, or Averey's affectionate jostling, or perhaps all three together.

"Oh yes, it'll be marrrrvelous!" he crowed, edging a little closer to his friend. "I never seen junglers up close before..." He paused realizing what he'd just said, and burst into another round of giggles. "Junglers? Junglers! I can't talk!"

He tried to return Averey's playful shove, but he was laughing so hard and feeling quite off-balance, and nearly toppled right off of his stool. Instead he toppled into Averey, who reached to catch him reflexively. Lucan braced himself against the bigger boy's broad chest, breathing hard against his neck as his giggles calmed. Averey's breath was warm against his ear, his strong arms hooked under the smaller boy's armpits. One of Lucan's hands was pressed right over Averey's sternum, and he realized his friend's heart was beating very rapidly. He could also smell him very strongly--the masculine scent of a man after a hard day's labour next to a roaring forge, a scent Lucan found not at all unpleasant.

Lucan thought he must have had far too much ale, with the strange, unbalanced, almost euphoric way he was feeling. He wasn't sure why he wasn't moving. He needed a reason to still be leaning close to Averey, so he turned his head a little and whispered something he wouldn't want anyone else to hear.

"If we'd been friends... a long time ago..." he breathed, panting in between, "I bet you could have saved me from all the bigger boys... who roughed me up. I bet you could have been my hero. Almost like a real knight."

 

[grdybiwife]

"You defend yourself just fine with that sharp tongue of yours," Averey said with his arm around Lucan's shoulder. He wasn't in any rush to push him away, he liked the contact between them but he didn't want the patrons to get the wrong idea. Reluctantly, he pulled away but lean so their arms still touched. "That's more than I can say for myself. At least you go down fight. I just hide," he said with a shrug. "I'm no knight Lucan. My Da wouldn't have it."

At the mention of his father, Averey's mood turned a little. Somewhere between sullen and angry but he tried to hide it with his mug of ale. He didn't want Lucan to think that it had anything to do with him so he changed the subject. "A jungler ah," He said with a chuckle. "Well I don't think I've seen one of those either. Maybe you should slow down on the ale. I don't want your Papa being angry with me when you show up wobbly."

 

[tamgreen]

As soon as he'd said the word "knight", Lucan wondered if he may have said completely the wrong thing. He noticed Averey retracting his arm, and becoming a bit serious for a moment. Suddenly he felt immensely regretful, despite Averey's quick joking response to lighten the mood. He looked down into his ale, and now it was his turn to become a bit sullen at the mention of his father.

Lucan picked up his ale and drank, deeply, deliberately, watching Averey overtop of his tankard. He panted to catch his breath and drew a sleeve across his mouth as he set it down. "Ha," he said humourlessly. "As if my father would be angry with you. You're his special favourite now. 'Sides, I'm wobbly at the best of times, aren't I?"

He heard the venom in his own voice and hung his head a little, plopping his chin into his hand as he propped his elbow on the bar. "I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I don't resent you... I swear. It's just... it's... the situation. It's... life." As quickly as his mood had turned up at the jolly tavern atmosphere and the company of an unexpected friend, it had shot down to a low point, and he was wallowing now, fretting over what to do with his life, and how to make his father proud.

"I'm sorry," he said again, trying to smile. "We're supposed to be having fun."

 

[grdybiwife]

"We are," Averey said honestly and gave Lucan's back a pat. "Friendship ain't always sunshine and roses. Isabelle and I argue every other day and we've been tied at the hip since we were babes. The sister I never wanted she always says. We're going to have spats Lucan that's the way it is but as long as we're honest with each other it'll be fine."

Their conversation was broken when Cecily came over with two bowls of thick meaty stew and a big hunk of bread still steaming from the oven. She gave both boys a big kiss on the forehead and told them to eat up before it got cold. The boys dug in, dutifully cleaning their plates. Just as they finished a musician began to pluck his lute and the the taverngoers began chanting his mother's name, goading her to sing. She feigned disinterest but Averey knew the truth. His mother loved to sing, loved the appreciation from the crowd. She would always oblige them.

Then let them drink till they nod and wink.
Even as good fellows should do ; They shall not miss to have the bliss
Good ale doth bring men to : And all poor souls that have scoured bowls,
Or have them lustily trowled, God save the lives of them and their wives.
Whether they be young or old.

 

[tamgreen]

Isabelle.

Lucan knew well that Averey was often in the company of the miller's daughter. He studied his friend with a piercing, appraising gaze, unsure how he felt about it. A boy and a girl could be friends, certainly, and Averey had spoken of her like a sister, but they were at an age now when such friendships could so easily blossom into something far deeper. The thought of this made Lucan even more petulant, and the hearty meal and a warm kiss from Averey's mother could not have come at a better time.

The thick stew and warm bread did wonders for the boy, and by the time he'd reached the bottom of his bowl, Lucan was feeling in buoyant spirits again. He used the last of his bread to clean the meaty drippings still clinging to his dish, and finished with a smile to Averey and a deep drink of ale.

Lucan clapped along spiritedly to the music, swinging his feet as he perched on the stool and loving the boisterous drinking song. He wasn't sure his ma and pa would approve, but he loved this place--it was warm and inviting and helped him to forget his troubles.

"Your ma sings really nice," he called to Averey over the tavern din. He grabbed his friend suddenly by the arm. "Let's dance! Couldn't we, Averey?"

 

[grdybiwife]

"Me...dance...I'm sorry Lucan but I am not built for such things," Averey said with a sort of bashful smile. "Believe me I've tried. You think you're awkward, you haven't seen me dance, my friend. But I'd love to see you try," He said and gave the boy a shove off his stool to join the other revelers. Averey's broad body was built for many things, grace was not one of them. Given his mother's musical ability, he'd tried but gave up about the time he started growing hair on his face. He had enough things to be embarassed about in his life, Averey didn't need to add poor dancing to the list.

 

[tamgreen]

Lucan stumbled into a knot of carousing patrons with all the grace of a gangly-legged foal freshly dropped from a mare's nethers. Uncoordinated enough without being tipsy, he scarcely had a chance to stand upright much less attempt a dance of any sort. The large, red-faced, and rather hairy men surrounding him had a good laugh and jostled the boy back and forth with good-natured teasing before he finally staggered back to Averey, grabbing hold of his shoulder for balance.

"Ahh... no... I think maybe I oughtn't to dance either," he breathed, and released a slightly tremulous laugh. He used Averey's broad frame to keep himself steady as he aimed his bottom back onto his stool, but continued hanging onto the boy's shirt. He looked up at him with a sort of thoughtful awe. It had never occurred to him that a young man as well-built as Avery Inman would ever feel uncomfortable in his own skin. It made him feel strangely warm, like he wasn't quite so alone in the world anymore. "Let's just be... awkward together, over here in a corner, away from the others... couldn't we?"

He gave an odd little smile and leaned close, whispering, "Can I tell you a secret?" He didn't wait for an affirmative before continuing: "Some years back, I overheard papa saying I ought to've been born a girl instead of a boy, and how easier it would've been for everyone. And I think he's right, too. Sometimes I really think he's right."

Lucan finally released his friend and sighed, propping his elbow on the bar and leaning on it. "Averey," he mused, taking on a distant tone and expression, "do you s'pose you'll wed Isabelle once y' done your 'prenticeship?"

 

[grdybiwife]

"Eww...marry Isabelle," Averey said and nearly spit the last of his ale across the bar. That wasn't the first time he'd been asked such a question, only now he figured he could be a bit more honest about it with Lucan. "She ain't much the marrying kind and even if she were she wouldn't be my kind...I mean I don't plan on marrying that is. Just tie you down is all and I don't...much care for the ladies," he said with a shrug, and gave Lucan a little wink. He put his empty mug down on the bar , thinking that perhaps he'd had too much, given how close he came to truth. And the wink he gave, was he actually flirting with Lucan? A boy who had just this morning dealt him the most disrespectful insults, a boy whom he was sure had little interest in him other than friendship. And even that was n't as solid as the ground they stood on.

But he couldn't help but think that those lingering touches and batted eyelashes were not simply from drink. There was a spark every time those slender hands touched him. And the blush that came too those soft cheeks when Averey looked into those eyes made led him to believe that perhaps he and Lucan Brecker had more in common than they both thought. But Averey wasn't so strong in his conviction to tell it himself.

"It's getting late Luc," he said to him softly as he lean his head closer to his new friends. "I don't want you to get into trouble. Maybe we should be getting you home before your Da comes a wondering?"

 

[tamgreen]

Lucan raised his head a little and looked up at Averey with a sort of awe. He didn't "plan on marrying", or even "care for the ladies?" Was that... allowed? Luc had been raised in a very traditional manner, and always took for granted the values that had been thrust upon him--namely, the assumption that a man must embark upon a manly career, and thereafter take a wife, and bear children to carry on his name and bloodline. These things held so much dread and foreboding for little Lucan that it startled and captivated him to hear Averey dismissing the very notion of marrying so flippantly.

The obvious question came to his teenage mind immediately: What about sex? Didn't Averey ever want to...?

Lucan swallowed with effort. Surely he couldn't ask his friend such questions, especially when they had only just become friends. But he wondered. He wondered if Averey got the same 'urges' he did. He wondered if Averey took care of them in the same way he did. Did Averey have his own room, for privacy? Or did he have to go somewhere, like when Lucan snuck out back and hid in the little alcove behind the woodpile?

His thoughts piled one on top of the next. His cheeks reddened as wondered what Averey might look like down there... whether it was big, like the rest of him.

Lucan squirmed in his seat. He was very inconveniently getting those familiar 'urges' right at this moment, and his breeches wouldn't disguise much.

He almost gasped when Averey leaned close to suggest to him it was probably time to be getting back. He nodded stiffly, but it took a few moments for him to actually think about what Averey was saying.

"Oh!" Lucan exclaimed, sliding down off his stool and steadying himself on the bar. "I... I never told him I was staying for supper! He'll probably be... oh gods!"

He allowed Averey to help him along a bit as he headed for the nearest exit where, in a show of rather uncanny timing, Ivor Breck nearly collided with the pair in the doorway.

"Oh--papa!" Lucan exclaimed, tensing up. "I was just..."

"Consarn it, boy--what's been keeping you? It's gone full dark, and your ma's been worried sick!" Ivor took the boy by his skinny arm and gave him a little shake. Noticing his higher-than-usual degree of unsteadiness, he frowned deeply. "You been into the ale then, son?" His voice was low and severe. He turned to Averey with a more apologetic expression, and his tone lightened. "I hope he hasn't given you trouble. I'll haul him home. Get yourself a good night's sleep, Averey, and we'll see you bright and early tomorrow morning."

Lucan looked back at Averey with a long, lingering, and entirely inscrutable expression before Ivor dragged him away.

All the way home, being helped along roughly by his father's large hand on his upper arm or the back of his shirt, Lucan was treated to a lecture about irresponsibility, the sort of unsavoury folk who frequented taverns, the evils of drunkenness, and general exhortations regarding wholesome behaviour.

"Yes, pa," Lucan sighed impatiently. "I 'ad too much ale, and I'm sure I'll regret it all o' my own come morning. I'm not a li'l boy anymore... and the inn isn't a bad place! You said yourself Averey's a good boy, an' his ma's a good lady. It's not fair, papa--why've you no problems with Averey, living in a place like that, and you don't even want me there one night?"

"Well, boy, I'll tell you one thing--you ain't Averey Inman!"

Lucan gritted his teeth. His vision blurred with the threat of tears. "That's just the big problem with me all around, I guess," he pouted.

"Ahh gods, boy... don't you go cryin' on me now," Ivor growled, giving him a little shake as they reached the shop and headed for the stairs. "You tell me in one breath you ain't a child no more, and snivel at me with the next? You'd better make up your fool mind, and I hope you make it on the side of being a man! No one's gonna be pickin' you up and wipin' your snotty face all your life. Now you stand up on your own two feet and face your ma."

Lucan clenched his jaw and sat at the kitchen table to endure another lecture about wholesome behaviour and responsibility. He was barely aware of what he said to quell his mother's wrath, but in the end she gave him a tight hug, at least glad that he was all right.

It was a relief to be able to go to bed. Lucan shed his boots and breeches and spread out his bedroll before the kitchen hearth like usual, snuggling in gratefully. Finally he was alone with his thoughts and his thoughts were on Averey. He found it suddenly difficult to rest. He tossed and squirmed and fought with his mind. He was growing quite hard again, possessed by those urges, and reached beneath his covers to grab hold of his little problem. He didn't take any earnest action at this point, knowing his parents were far too near and might awaken at any time, and were obviously concerned enough about 'wholesomeness' that they weren't likely to approve of him playing with himself.

An excuse to escape outside presented itself handily--he had to pee, badly, after all the ale he'd drunk. He stepped into a pair of slippers and staggered down the stairs and out into the backyard, naked from the waist down, but his shirt stretched down to mid-thigh. He had a chamber pot upstairs, but always preferred just to go outside than to have to clean out the pot in the morning, at least when the weather was fair.

He stood at a bush, waiting an extravagantly long time for his body to calm enough to allow the passage of urine, and when it finally did, he groaned as he watered the ground copiously, emptying his aching bladder.

Instead of returning to the house, he slipped over to the woodshed and hid in the little private alcove behind the woodpile, his favourite, secret place where no one ever looked. He leaned against the fragrant wood and sighed deeply, stroking himself back to full hardness. It took very little time to excite his sensitive cock, and he tugged on it furiously, biting down hard on his lower lip as he worked himself up to a breathless climax. He tightly suppressed the urge to groan aloud as his body tensed--right in this moment, Averey and his strong arms and handsome smile and golden curls had rushed to the forefront of his mind--and he spurted forth an array of eager seed, which spattered a fair distance but was quickly lost in the sawdust and dirt below.

Feeling sated, albeit a bit confused and shameful about what had just happened, Lucan staggered his way back to bed, but didn't spare much time contemplating the meaning of it. He was asleep moments after he had pulled his blanket over himself.

********

It was Ivor who kicked him awake the next morning, and Lucan felt as if he could have throttled his father for it. He felt like death personified, and groaned in agony for some time before shifting his body from horizontal to vertical. He kicked his legs clumsily into his breeches and slithered onto a bench at the breakfast table, where both his mother and father glared across at him, demonstrating clearly how unimpressed they were.

Lucan drank some cold water, and some hot tea, and forced a filling breakfast upon himself, which helped revive him a fair amount. He spoke as little as possible, and by the time he was ready to put his boots on, he was feeling almost cheerful... because Averey was going to be here soon.

 

[grdybiwife]

This was exactly what Averey didn't want to happen. The last thing he wanted was for Lucan to get into trouble and despite what Ivor had said, Averey felt it was very much his fault. Dragged away before he could explain, Averey was left hoping the steps they'd taken today weren't reversed. Not many of the tavern goers noticed Lucan's dramatic departure and those that did simply averted their eyes.

Cecily saw and noticed her son's demeanor sullen immediately. She would have intervened had it not happened so fast. Despite popular opinion, Ivor had always treated her with decency and respect. She would have gladly taken the blame for keeping Averey so long away from home, then perhaps she wouldn't have to watch her son trudge through the dining looking sad and dejected as he made his way to his room around back. She started to follow but her father stopped her.

"He'll never be a man if you keep up that coddling girl," he said to her with his hand on her elbow. "Let him be. He'll work it out on his own." It was hard but she left him to it.

Alone in his room, Averey kicked off his boots and stripped down to his breeches before he lay down in his bed. It wasn't much, a broken bed from one of the rooms upstairs, a wobbly chair, a table with three legs and no door but it was more privacy than most children his age enjoyed. Papa's room was just across the narrow hall but he kept his door closed if he was inside so Averey never had to worry much about being peeked on.

He was a man now, with mannish needs and desires. Though he couldn't much act on them, Averey was allowed to ruminate on these desires. He blew out his lantern and lay back in bed, his eyes fixed on nothing in the darkness. All his thoughts centered on one thing. Lucan. Before today he had barely given the boy a second glance, given his flighty behavior and sharp tongue. He was the last boy Averey ever thought of as a possible companion. He was smart, prone to daydreaming, and handsome in his own way. Almost pretty with his pouty lips and bright eyes. Even his shockingly red hair played well against his porcelain skin, unmarked by the bumps and pocks of most boys their age. His hands soft and slender, Averey found it hard to even imagine him wielding a hammer in the smithy.

What he did imagine were those hands on him, touching him tenderly about his body. Before long Averey's own hand found it's way into his breeches to play against his hardness. He closed his eyes and imagined kissing those soft lips. At one point in their evening Averey thought that Lucan may have wanted just that but he chalked it up to his own desires. In his mind though he allowed himself the pleasure of those lips on his, doing something he had only practiced with Isabelle. But Averey got the feeling he would enjoy Lucan's kiss much more than Isabelle's. For starters, he actually wanted to kiss Lucan. With Isabelle, it had always been an experiment of sorts.

He quickly pushed thoughts of her from his mind and focused on Lucan. He wanted so much to spend time with him, even if it were only as friends. Though from the way the boy looked at him, how his touch always seemed to linger, Averey got the feeling that Lucan might share his interest. That thought alone pushed him over the edge and Averey soiled his breeches. It wouldn't have been the first time. His mother had long since stopped inquiring of the suspicious stains on his underpants. The deed done, Averey drifted off to a restful sleep filled with dreams of Lucan.

He awoke the next morning refreshed and excited. And before anyone else. It was a rare occasion, so Averey went about cleaning himself up quietly as not to disturb anyone. He started the cook fire for his mother and got water from the well, all before she made her appearance in the kitchen. She was shocked to see him, startled really.

"Gods boy you scared the piss out of me," she shouted as she pushed through the door and Averey laughed at her vulgarity. "What has you up before the birds?" She lean down to kiss the top of his head and rough his hair before she started breakfast. Averey got up from the table to give her room to work, grabbed an end of yesterdays bread to much on while he waited.

"Slept well enough I guess," he said, but he felt color rise in his face. "Eager to start my second day of work is all," he added and his mother raised an eyebrow.

"You and that Lucan seemed to get along well enough," she said innocuously only furthering her son's blush. "Just be careful son. The Breckers aren't like us. You saw how his father dragged him out of here. I'd hate to see you get your hopes up for something that may not be," she said and Averey knew the advice was spoken from her own experience with his father.

"I know Ma you mustn't remind me," he said with a gentle rub to her shoulder. "Just nice to talk to one my own age is all."

"I bore you do I," Papa said from his doorway and Averey frowned. "Oh stop your pouting boy. I'm just teasing. I'm an old man and you've heard all my stories twice. But listen to your mother. She knows well of things that may not be."

"You seem to take great joy in reminding me Da," Cecily said with a smirk and Papa shook his fist at her. "Speaking of what may not be, your Da sent word of his next visit. A full weeks leave and he plans to spend it entirely with you."

"When?" Averey nearly shouted he was so excited and Cecily smiled.

"The end of harvest."

"So long to wait," he said dejected and his mother laughed.

"Two whole weeks is an eternity for one so young I suppose," she said and Averey scoffed. "Sit down and have your breakfast so you can go sulk at the smithy."

Averey set to it like a man on a mission. At the mention of the shop, his mind immediately went to Lucan and he wolfed down his breakfast in record time. He had to keep from running down the lane as he dodged and ducked between carts on their way to market. At the back door, he knocked twice and waited to be invited in.

 

[tamgreen]

"I've got it, papa!" Lucan exclaimed the moment he heard the knock on the door. He held both hands against his temples for a moment as he hurried over, having given himself a touch of a headache from recklessly yelling, but mercifully, it did not linger.

He swung the door open with a huge grin. His eyes were a bit bloodshot and rimmed with dark circles, but they were nonetheless cheerful and smiled along with his mouth.

"Good morning, Averey!" he chirped, two blooms of red spreading across his fair cheeks. He hooked his arm around the other boy's elbow to usher him inside. "Are you well? I feel a touch poorly this morning but I'm getting along all right." He noted a slightly uncertain look on Averey's face, and recalled the way they had parted last night. He lowered his voice to a whisper. "Don't worry--I wasn't in much trouble. Ma and pa just don't want me to become a drunkard." He rolled his eyes.

 

[grdybiwife]

"Judging by those red shot eyes I'd say they're safe of that shame," Averey said in hushed tones as he allowed Lucan lead him inside. Even despite the dark circles ringing the boys eyes, Avery still thought him beautiful. He pulled his arm free of him, gently, not wanting his touch to cause any unsavory reactions in the Brecker home. "I hope you weren't too embarassed to come back sometime. No one much noticed, if they had, the inn is not a place of judgement. And Ma wants to get a look at that eye, though I'd say it looks right as rain if you ask me." With a hand on his face, Averey tipped Lucan's face up to get a closer look at what little bruising that remained from the boys accidents the day before. He hadn't been lying, it did look much better. A small smile came to his lips as he let his fingers linger on that cherub like face.

But not for too long. Heavy footsteps down the stairs brought Averey back to his sense and he pulled his hand free. Though the smile remained as Ivor Brecker made his appearance at the bottom of the stairs. "Good morning sir...Smithy I mean. I hope I'm not too early."

"Nonsense boy," he said in his booming voice as he made his way over to the boys. And Averey notice Lucan's mood shift a bit. "I see the ale was a bit kinder too you than that one."

"It wasn't much, honest," Averey said, as he shift his eyes to his friend. "We were just celebrating the start of my apprenticeship...in a manly way... It was my idea for him to stay for dinner and Lucan didn't want to turn down my hospitality. The blame is mine sir, honest."

"Manly way you say," said Ivor as he looked from Averey to his son and back again. "Lucan knows well the rules of this house but I guess it is time he started make some of his own. Before his Ma and I married I spent many a night stumbling home from your Papa's place so I guess I can't be too surprised that he's found his way to one of those stools. Your a good boy Averey," he said with a heavy clap to his shoulder. "I guess I can turn a blind eye to any gallivanting of his so long as you're there." That was a response Averey did not expect, nor was the rustling of Lucan's hair by his father. "Alright with that settled, let's get to work shall we...men," he added with a smirk at both boys.

 

[tamgreen]

Lucan noticed the way Averey pulled gently away from his grasp--he seemed to do that a lot, and Lucan worried he would put his friend off with the little gestures of affection. Truthfully he was starved for affection and terribly excited to have a friend in Averey. It was hard not to constantly grab and touch him, to be close to the big, handsome boy, but maybe, like Ivor, Averey was embarrassed by affection between males. To be brushed off by both of them made Lucan feel like he could cry, and then he berated himself for wanting to cry, because that wasn't something men did. But every once in a while he would get a little gesture from Averey that made him want to keep trying. Like the way the bigger boy had helped him when he'd hurt himself yesterday.

And the way he was touching his face now, checking on his injury. The touch of that hand on his smooth cheek sent warm tingles through him, like tiny stars dancing all over his body. Lucan couldn't breathe when Averey smiled at him. He suddenly thought of what he'd done last night behind the woodpile, and he felt warm, so warm, and those little stars rushing through him tingled even more enthusiastically, and there was all at once a growing problem inside his breeches.

Lucan's breath finally left his lungs when Averey turned away to greet Ivor. He turned his body away for a few moments and forced himself to calm. His cheeks were blazing.

His father's presence quickly chastened him, and he dropped his head and shoulders a little. Once more he stopped breathing when Averey explained about last night. He was a little panicked at the prospect of his friend trying to take the blame for what had upset his parents. But then he realized how his father was responding and he was astonished, nearly floored at the way Averey had so smoothly and eloquently phrased last night's events in a way that would make perfect sense to Ivor. Lucan was flabbergasted. Suddenly papa had not only stopped being angry with him, but was actually sort of approving. How did Averey do that?

Lucan's eyes rested on Averey, again feeling like he could burst into tears, but for an entirely different reason. His hands trembled with the need to grab Averey, to hug him and squeeze him. He needed his arms around him, needed to be close, and maybe to whisper a hundred thousand thanks.

As their morning went on, Lucan was having a hard time finding an opportunity. He needed to wait until Ivor was away before he would dare to hug his friend, and it wasn't happening. All morning his stomach was doing flip-flops that had nothing to do with his mild hangover, and he couldn't keep the dreamy, foolish, puppydog look off of his face anytime Averey looked in his direction.

He struggled to get through duties, and to avoid clumsy accidents. He truly tried. Twice he dropped a bucket of coal on the stairs coming up from the coal cellar, but no one was there to notice. He just went back and dutifully cleaned up his mess, emerging finally with his hands and arms smudged with black, which he wiped off as much as he could on an old rag. He had touched his face without thinking, though, didn't realize there were a few dark smudges still lingering across his forehead and one cheek.

When he returned to check on Averey and his father, he noticed the boy was finally alone. He didn't know where Ivor had gone, but he didn't care, and he couldn't wait any longer. He hurried up behind Averey as the boy stood at a workbench, and collided with him, pressing his thin body against Averey's broad back and wrapping his arms around him, very snugly, grabbing handfuls of his shirt and pulling him tightly close, trembling with need.

"I'm sorry," he gasped, his breath against the back of Averey's neck. "I just... really like you a lot. I'm sorry. I mean, thank you! Thank you. You made my father think better of me, and I didn't think anyone could."

 

[grdybiwife]

Shock wasn't really an accurate description of how how he felt of Lucan's sudden show of affection. Startled was closer to what he felt. He jumped a little and immediately looked around for Ivor, Lucan's touch making him forget the smithy had gone around to the tanner to mend some of the equipment too large to transport to the shop. He should have known he was nowhere to be found, otherwise Lucan would not have risked such a demonstrative act. Alone, Averey found no reason to cut the contact short and turned in Lucan's arms.

"Aye there's no need to be sorry or thankful," Averey said as he returned the smaller man's embrace, allowing his hands to roam tentatively up Lucan's back. "We promised to help each other. I can't have your Da being cross with you for something we'd both done. Something we should by all rights be allowed to do. We're men, why shouldn't we be allowed to enjoy an ale or two after a hard days labor," he said, looking down into those beautiful eyes, though his gaze moved quickly down to those pouty lips.

With their bodies pressed together, Averey could feel heat rising all about his torso and down through his loins. He knew well it had little to do with the forge. It wouldn't be long before that heat gave way to his excitement but he couldn't bear pushing Lucan away. The pleasant dreams of the night before wafted into his mind and before he could stop himself, Averey found his hands moving up Lucan's back. His fingers tracing their way along the back of his neck. His head lowered and he closed his eye to place a soft tentative kiss on those soft lips.

 

[tamgreen]

A great big bubble of joy and excitement rose up in Lucan's chest when Averey wrapped his strong arms around him. He hung on the bigger boy's every word, though the movement of Averey's hands up his back was terribly distracting. How was this so good? Why did it feel so good? Was he allowed to feel this good about being held like this by a boy?

His thoughts shut off completely when Averey kissed him. His eyelids fluttered, and then closed. His fingertips dug into Averey's back.

Oh gods.

Mouth... soft. So tender. Warm. Heart beating. Everything beating. Pulsing. Blood rushing. Hands clutching. Warm. Hot.

Gods!

When Averey tried to break the kiss, Lucan whimpered--a small, mewling, kittenish sound--and pressed forward, keeping his mouth on Averey's as if it were his lifeline. A little contented sigh rose from him, hands grasping, body gently, unconsciously rocking. His tongue slipped out curiously to taste Averey's lips. So sweet. Soft. Warm. He was scarcely aware of his arousal pressing against the bigger boy's leg. This was the greatest feeling in the world. Lucan had never kissed anyone before--was this what boys got so excited about when they went after girls? Was this what he was supposed to want to do with girls?

But Averey was a boy!

Gasping, flushed, Lucan finally eased his grip on his friend, lowered his head, and backed his hips away from Averey's.

"I... I'm sorry," he stammered, having no idea how to account for what had just happened.

 

[grdybiwife]

"No, I'm sorry Luc...I shouldn't have...I didn't mean..."Averey was too embarrassed to complete his thoughts. Too embarrassed to remain in the boys presence. He'd done it now, ruined his only chance at friendship because he couldn't control himself. "I have to go," he mumbled just before he tore out of the shop, running full tilt.

Anywhere but here, he thought to himself over and over again. He couldn't believe he'd done it, actually kissed a boy. Part of him was proud, for having the courage that he never thought he would possess. A small part, but it was enough to make him smile. And stop running. He hadn't gotten far, just to the edge of the village but here Averey could be alone with his thoughts. With a deep sigh he turned himself around and started a slow return back to the shop.

"A man doesn't run boy," his father had told him so many times. "I know you think I ran from your Ma but we couldn't be the way that we believed we could. The way I believed. But I've always taken care of you both the best way I could without being with you every day. Despite what my petty wife says or my idiot brothers or my own father. I defy them all because you are mine and no one will make me feel shame for loving you."

With these thoughts in mind Averey made his way back to the shop. He was a man now and he was done running from his feelings. From himself. I'm a man, he thought as he came around the back of the shop. And I think I might be in love Lucan Brecker. He just hoped that he didn't hurt his feelings too bad. The last thing he wanted to do was make Lucan cry.

 

[tamgreen]

Lucan was left baffled and quite forlorn as Averey dashed off so soon after... whatever had happened between them. He couldn't help but be plunged into the depths of despair at his friend's departure when that moment had almost certainly been the happiest moment young Lucan had ever experienced. Something had happened, and he'd ruined it somehow--he was certain he'd ruined it. He'd had a taste of something magical, something truly beautiful, and it was flying away from him like a little bird.

Everything in him wanted to run after Averey, to refuse to let him go, no matter what. But perhaps if he pursued, he would only push Averey away more! And there was also the fact that his father would be beyond furious if he left the forge unattended. Though he would never be a smith, he knew better.

Lucan perched on a stool next to the forge, feeling the intense heat against his face. His tears felt boiling hot as they began to slide down his cheeks, leaving little clean lines in the sooty smudges that had accumulated on his face. When Ivor came back to find his apprentice had fled, Lucan knew he would bear the blame, and probably deservedly too. Much worse than that, though, was knowing he had lost his friend. No--something better than a friend. The idea that he might never be able to enjoy Averey's friendly company again, never be able to touch him, hold him, (kiss him)... it was unbearable. Lucan wept with increasing anguish. Why did he have to screw up everything, absolutely everything?

"Averey!" he whimpered. "Averey..."

His thin fingers tore at his chest, as if he could pull his ribcage open and pluck out his own pounding heart. He felt as if he would burst with the feelings that had burgeoned inside him. Was this what love felt like? It was horrible, absolutely horrible!

When he heard approaching footsteps he gulped in a huge breath and forced himself to stop crying. His hands, still curled into claws, paused upon his chest. He turned his head halfway, peeking out from beneath his mussed hair. He had expected his father, but instead it was Averey. Averey!! Lucan didn't know whether to be immensely relieved or embarrassed at his own horrendous sensitivity. He simply sat there on his little stool, gaping at the bigger boy, having no idea what to say in this situation.

 

[grdybiwife]

He could hear him crying before he stepped into the doorway, Averey just hoped that Ivor hadn't returned yet. The steps he took were slow and deliberate as he crossed the shop floor, that is until Lucan turned around and he saw the smug of tears on his face. Averey rushed over to him, nearly knocking the stool over as he took that delicate body in his arms. "Please forgive me," he pleaded quietly for fear they might be overheard. "Please don't cry Lucan...I'm sorry... I shouldn't have... I just thought...please don't cry. I didn't mean to hurt you. Honest."

Averey repeated those word countless times, almost making them a mantra, as he held his friend close. He could feel his tears on his chest as Lucan trembled against him. "I understand if you don't want to be friends anymore. I'll even leave the shop just don't tell your father. Please Lucan don't tell your Da that we... that I..." Averey couldn't even say what he had done. Fear gripped him as tightly as he held Lucan. "I always ruin everything," he mumbled as he pulled away.

 

[tamgreen]

Lucan leaned into Averey gratefully as the bigger boy grabbed hold of him. He cried into Averey's shirt and slowly let the strong arms and soothing words calm his tears. He didn't want Averey to ever let him go. He was still at a complete loss to make sense of any of this, including what exactly his friend was so sorry for.

He stopped breathing as Averey spoke of not being friends anymore... of leaving, and.... Did he really just say he ruined everything?!

"What...!" Lucan gasped out. He darted after Averey as the boy drew back, refusing to let him go. He grabbed hold of Averey's arm, wrapping himself around it. "Y-you don't ruin anything! I'm the screw-up."

He pressed his wet face against Averey's sleeve. "Please, please don't say you'll go!" he moaned, his voice muffled by the fabric of the young man's shirt. "I swear to all gods, I won't tell a soul ever, never! I won't tell anyone anything, not a blessed word, Averey--please, let us be friends still! I need you, please, please!"

He rested his cheek on Averey's shoulder, wide eyes inclined to fix on his friend's. "Couldn't we do it again, Averey?" he whispered timidly. "Didn't you like it? Is it bad?"

 

[grdybiwife]

Lucan's pleas were like music to Averey's ears. He had hoped that he hadn't misjudged the situation. The way his touch always seemed to linger beyond what was generally acceptable among friends. The way Lucan's eyes seemed to sparkle whenever he looked at him. "Of course we can do it again," he said quietly as he rubbed his hand along the back of Lucan's neck, his fingertips playing at the wispy hair there. "I thought you would be angry with me. That's why I ran away but I won't do that ever again. Not from you or anything else, but we should probably wait 'til we're alone. You're Da will have me strung up and send you off to the monastery if we're caught," Averey said as he wrenched himself away from Lucan.

Ivor hadn't said how long he would be away and Averey didn't want to think of what might have happened if he walked in on them now. He immediately busied his hands at the sharpening wheel with the chisel he started the day before, all the while stealing glances at Lucan as he went about his day. Averey couldn't believe it, he'd actually kissed a boy and his world did not come crashing down on him.

Ivor returned in time for lunch and again Averey was invited to stay. There was no hesitation in it this time, even despite the dirty look from Mrs. Brecker. She probably thought worse of him after Lucan's return from the inn but he didn't care. People had been looking at him like that all his life.

"Don't mind her," Ivor said around a mouthful of bread. "She don't understand menfolk. Maybe a tankard less will do you better Luc..."

"Or eat a little more before," Averey added and Ivor raised his mug of mead to him.

"Aye, that'll do too boy, that'll do."

"So you won't mind Luc coming to the inn for dinner again...I promise I'll make sure he gets home before last bell..."

"Bah," Ivor said with a raised hand, turned his attention to his son. "As long as you're awake when you're supposed to be and don't get our family dragged into the village gossip, I don't care what you're up to Luc. I was doing twice as worse when I was your age, perhaps that's why your Ma is so intent on keeping you so close. But don't you worry about that, I'll deal with her," he said and reached across the table to rough the boy's hair. "I'm sure Averey will look after you well enough."

"So did you want to," Averey asked Lucan already knowing what the answer would be, he just wanted to be sure that he wouldn't be getting into anymore trouble his parents. Averey knew that would make them seeing each other away from the shop that much more difficult.