The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

[xOxCherryxOx]

(Is the chocolate in those coins ever good? )

And you get a long, soft spearmint sigh in return.

I put in a tub of popcorn, a few mugs of cocoa and several shots of 100 proof peppermint schnapps to share during the movie.

and I wonder what sort of flick this golden ticket got us in to but I figure the spiked cocoa and good company is worth it no matter what.

I put in spooky music..

 

[Zom_Dom]

And Vincent Price, Lon Chaney and Bela Lugosi all step from the shadows at once, then quickly take handfuls of popcorn and seats as we wait for the movie to begin.

I put in a few random film trailers in dutch, russian and vietnamese languages, respectively.

 

[DeevaLicious]

And Vincent Price, Lon Chaney and Bela Lugosi all step from the shadows at once, then quickly take handfuls of popcorn and seats as we wait for the movie to begin.

I put in a few random film trailers in dutch, russian and vietnamese languages, respectively.

and I study their body language to try to figure out what their about as I wish I knew other languages.

I put in a few tissues in case there's a sad part in the movie..

 

[Zom_Dom]

And they burst forth from the vending machine's tiny door as origami cranes, their tiny wings flapping as they float lazily south for the rest of the winter.

I put in a few cheesy cliches - "suddenly, a shot rang out, a woman screamed and the throwaway character fell to the ground" "an evil twin," "two lovers rolling in the surf on a beach," and "the scientist's secret weapon, which couldn't possibly fail, failed."

 

[DeevaLicious]

And they burst forth from the vending machine's tiny door as origami cranes, their tiny wings flapping as they float lazily south for the rest of the winter.

I put in a few cheesy cliches - "suddenly, a shot rang out, a woman screamed and the throwaway character fell to the ground" "an evil twin," "two lovers rolling in the surf on a beach," and "the scientist's secret weapon, which couldn't possibly fail, failed."

and I realize you forgot one important one! The one where the future victim hears a sound and goes searching out the culprit ending up in some awful circumstance.

I put in someone yelling in the theatre..

 

[Zom_Dom]

(oooooh good one Dee! )

And we all throw popcorn at them until they quiet down again, and wait for the victim to open the door we all know they shouldn't...

I put in a few obvious plot twists, a random cameo or two and a shocking unmasking of the killer, and a few misplaced people, dressed in drag, throwing rice and doing the Timewarp in the aisles.

 

[xOxCherryxOx]

(oooooh good one Dee! )

And we all throw popcorn at them until they quiet down again, and wait for the victim to open the door we all know they shouldn't...

I put in a few obvious plot twists, a random cameo or two and a shocking unmasking of the killer, and a few misplaced people, dressed in drag, throwing rice and doing the Timewarp in the aisles.

And it's just a jump to the left and then a step to the right, put your hands on your hips and bring your knee's in tight. But it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane!

I put in a another dimention with voyueristic intentions...

 

[Zom_Dom]

And out pops a sweet transvestite from transexual transylvania...

I put in a bag of Curry (get it?) flavored potato chips, so we'll have something new to throw besides rice.

 

[xOxCherryxOx]

And out pops a sweet transvestite from transexual transylvania...

I put in a bag of Curry (get it?) flavored potato chips, so we'll have something new to throw besides rice.

got it

and when the birds try eatting the curry chips they flutter around wildly providing extra entertainment.

I put in a tube of bright red lipstick..

 

[Zom_Dom]

got it

and when the birds try eatting the curry chips they flutter around wildly providing extra entertainment.

I put in a tube of bright red lipstick..

And the vending machine looks pretty in red... Who knew?

I put in a pidgeon eating a hot dog.

 

[xOxCherryxOx]

And the vending machine looks pretty in red... Who knew?

I put in a pidgeon eating a hot dog.

(are you out feeding the birds? lol)

and it becomes an attraction for people walking by to point and laugh at.

I put in a clown making balloon figures..

 

[Zom_Dom]

(are you out feeding the birds? lol)

and it becomes an attraction for people walking by to point and laugh at.

I put in a clown making balloon figures..

And as the number of balloon animals begins to increase, the sky around the clown begins to resemble a plastic, helium filled zoo.

I put in a short, stocky ringmaster with a high, squeaky voice who resembles Danny DeVito.

 

[xOxCherryxOx]

And as the number of balloon animals begins to increase, the sky around the clown begins to resemble a plastic, helium filled zoo.

I put in a short, stocky ringmaster with a high, squeaky voice who resembles Danny DeVito.

And I think to myself that he must have been sucking air out of the helium tank because no one has a voice that bad..or do they?

I put in The World's Strongest Man for another vending machine circus attraction..

 

[Zom_Dom]

And I think to myself that he must have been sucking air out of the helium tank because no one has a voice that bad..or do they?

I put in The World's Strongest Man for another vending machine circus attraction..

And a lot of grunting and grumbling comes from the little door as the strong man tries to force his way back out.

I quickly cram in an Alligator Boy, a Bearded Lady, a Tattooed Man and some Siamese Twins to round out the vending machine's sideshow, and keep the strongman from escaping...

 

[xOxCherryxOx]

And a lot of grunting and grumbling comes from the little door as the strong man tries to force his way back out.

I quickly cram in an Alligator Boy, a Bearded Lady, a Tattooed Man and some Siamese Twins to round out the vending machine's sideshow, and keep the strongman from escaping...

And I shake my head at the bearded lady and invite her to the salon for a trim and a wax job because a lady needs to look her best, and I drool a little over the tattooed man because well..*sigh* tattoo's...

I put in a order for a larger vending machine this ones full...

 

[Zom_Dom]

And I shake my head at the bearded lady and invite her to the salon for a trim and a wax job because a lady needs to look her best, and I drool a little over the tattooed man because well..*sigh* tattoo's...

I put in a order for a larger vending machine this ones full...

And the new one arrives and is placed right next to the old.

To innaugurate the new vending machine, I put in a red ribbon and a gold pair of scissors.

 

[xOxCherryxOx]

And the new one arrives and is placed right next to the old.

To innaugurate the new vending machine, I put in a red ribbon and a gold pair of scissors.

And I take out a camera saying cheese! clicking a picture as you cut said ribbon.

I put in a Twist and Shout hoping to get the damn TimeWarp song out of my head...

 

[Zom_Dom]

And I take out a camera saying cheese! clicking a picture as you cut said ribbon.

I put in a Twist and Shout hoping to get the damn TimeWarp song out of my head...

And you end up with a bad case of the Hippy Hippy Shakes, or is it the Jitterbug? Then again, it might be Saterday night fever, even though it's still far from the weekend...

I put in an equally bad, equally catchy song... "The Final Countdown," by Europe.

 

[xOxCherryxOx]

And you end up with a bad case of the Hippy Hippy Shakes, or is it the Jitterbug? Then again, it might be Saterday night fever, even though it's still far from the weekend...

I put in an equally bad, equally catchy song... "The Final Countdown," by Europe.

and it brings back days of Aqua Net hairspray and mile high teased bangs.

I put in a disco ball and a Bee Gee's record..

 

[DeevaLicious]

and it brings back days of Aqua Net hairspray and mile high teased bangs.

I put in a disco ball and a Bee Gee's record..

And I'm "Ah ah ah ah staying alive, staying alive"

I put in a dancing lesson with John Travolta..

 

[Zom_Dom]

And I'm "Ah ah ah ah staying alive, staying alive"

I put in a dancing lesson with John Travolta..

And you come out of it a Rhinestone Cowgirl.

I put in a Midnight Cowboy in return.

 

[xOxCherryxOx]

And you come out of it a Rhinestone Cowgirl.

I put in a Midnight Cowboy in return.

and I decide to "Save a Horse Ride a Cowboy"

I put in a Big & Rich "Lost in this moment with you" single..

 

[andy_charles]

and I decide to "Save a Horse Ride a Cowboy"

I put in a Big & Rich "Lost in this moment with you" single..

And I'm cast in a big Hollywood romantic enemble comedy...for some reason...

I put in a state-of-the-art telescope...

 

[Zom_Dom]

And you are given the opportunity to see vast untold, uncharted stars and planets, visions of beauty, the scope of which are unequaled by anything in this world... Or the chance to see into your incredibly hot neighbor's apartment across the way...

I put in an equally tough moral conundrum, "Black or Green tea with lunch?" and a small copper kettle.

 

[YoursSINSerely]

And you are given the opportunity to see vast untold, uncharted stars and planets, visions of beauty, the scope of which are unequaled by anything in this world... Or the chance to see into your incredibly hot neighbor's apartment across the way...

I put in an equally tough moral conundrum, "Black or Green tea with lunch?" and a small copper kettle.

and, some warm woolen mittens.

I put in snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes.