The AH Pick-Me-Up Thread

[Laurel]

(I don't know if this has already been done. If there is already a similar thread, my apologies! )

Every now and then, we'll get an email or a PM from a Lit author who is having a rough time. Maybe their latest stories aren't getting the raves they did before. Or maybe a bit of criticism really hit hard. Either way, they start to lose confidence in their writing and in themselves in general.

You may know a fellow Lit author going through a rough patch as a writer. You may be going through a rough patch yourself!

This thread is a place where you can let the AH know you are (or a fellow author is) feeling a bit down, and the AH can help pick you back up.

Please note: this thread is for positive, encouraging posts only. Mean-spirited comments, insults, and fighting will be removed.


*

 

[Laurel]

I'll start. There's an author going through a rough patch right now:
sexnovella (author page) | (forum page)

Sexnovella has been an active participant in the Survivor contests and Special contests for several years now. He is not a native English speaker, but has written dozens of English-language stories - as you can see. Writing compelling stories in one's native language is tough enough; writing in a foreign language AND submitting it publicly takes a great deal of strength and courage. He listens to readers and submits edits of stories based on their feedback. His writing has greatly improved since he began posting in 2013. I think he has a great way with words and of telling a tale.

Recently, his stories have been trolled with cruel personal insults. On top of that, despite his years at Lit, he feels he has no friends here. Finding a place on the AH can be tough. He's feeling really down, and considering quitting Literotica.

Learning to handle cruel/trolling comments and criticism is important for any writer. I think it's easier to do this when you know you have support. So I want sexnovella to know this: you are part of the AH. You do have friends here. Other authors understand what you're going through. You are not alone in this! We at Lit all here for you.

 

[Kantarii]

I'll start. There's an author going through a rough patch right now:
sexnovella (author page) | (forum page)

Sexnovella has been an active participant in the Survivor contests and Special contests for several years now. He is not a native English speaker, but has written dozens of English-language stories - as you can see. Writing compelling stories in one's native language is tough enough; writing in a foreign language AND submitting it publicly takes a great deal of strength and courage. He listens to readers and submits edits of stories based on their feedback. His writing has greatly improved since he began posting in 2013. I think he has a great way with words and of telling a tale.

Recently, his stories have been trolled with cruel personal insults. On top of that, despite his years at Lit, he feels he has no friends here. Finding a place on the AH can be tough. He's feeling really down, and considering quitting Literotica.

Learning to handle cruel/trolling comments and criticism is important for any writer. I think it's easier to do this when you know you have support. So I want sexnovella to know this: you are part of the AH. You do have friends here. Other authors understand what you're going through. You are not alone in this! We at Lit all here for you.

Too often people associate constructive criticism with being mean. It happens often with the English language and how people interpret the written word that is in emotionless text. A prime example would be if someone started off their conversation with the phrases " For you information" or "Don't take this the wrong way", Hell, even "Just so you know" can be misinterpreted.

The only issues I have is trying to get a couple of my stories passed through the "EDITED" process. Other than that, I'm having a great time here on the site. Kant

 

[lovecraft68]

Hey, this is a great idea.

I think some readers forget-or sadly don't care- that there are real people behind the Av's and the stories and those people have feelings.

The trolling seems to have picked up on the stories the last few months, at least it seems that way in what I see when I'm browsing and the number of newer people coming here and venting about it.

Why? Who knows, except we're living in some tough hateful times and many people get their frustration about spewing across the net. What we see here at lit is tame compared to the shit that goes on in FB and twitter and reddit.

The best thing I can tell anyone is in general there are still far more positive commens than negatives. The average score on this site seems to be in the 4 range meaning far more good votes than bad votes.

Even everyone's friend 'anymouse' leaves more positive than negative remarks.

So as my wife who is a motivational speaker, life coach says, as silly as it sounds look at the positive. And either laugh at the trolls for being the sad people they are or delete their comments as soon as you get them.

It is easy to say, but its true, this is not personal, these assholes do not know you, and I guarantee they have never had the guts-or talent-to put up a story.

Haters gonna hate and they hate, why?

Because they're jealous, so look at it that way.

You Sex Novella, won the final survivor contest.

They hate you cause they ain't you.

 

[lovecraft68]

Too often people associate constructive criticism with being mean. It happens often with the English language and how people interpret the written word that is in emotionless text. A prime example would be if someone started off their conversation with the phrases " For you information" or "Don't take this the wrong way", Hell, even "Just so you know" can be misinterpreted.

The only issues I have is trying to get a couple of my stories passed through the "EDITED" process. Other than that, I'm having a great time here on the site. Kant

I don't think constructive criticism is the issue here, Laurel called out cruel trolling, nothing constructive about that. I think most here can handle-and are looking for constructive comments.

But there's a far cry between that and flat out abuse.

 

[lovecraft68]

I'll start. There's an author going through a rough patch right now:
sexnovella (author page) | (forum page)

Sexnovella has been an active participant in the Survivor contests and Special contests for several years now. He is not a native English speaker, but has written dozens of English-language stories - as you can see. Writing compelling stories in one's native language is tough enough; writing in a foreign language AND submitting it publicly takes a great deal of strength and courage. He listens to readers and submits edits of stories based on their feedback. His writing has greatly improved since he began posting in 2013. I think he has a great way with words and of telling a tale.

Recently, his stories have been trolled with cruel personal insults. On top of that, despite his years at Lit, he feels he has no friends here. Finding a place on the AH can be tough. He's feeling really down, and considering quitting Literotica.

Learning to handle cruel/trolling comments and criticism is important for any writer. I think it's easier to do this when you know you have support. So I want sexnovella to know this: you are part of the AH. You do have friends here. Other authors understand what you're going through. You are not alone in this! We at Lit all here for you.

In a case like this, have you looked into the trolling at all? As in seeing if its the same person? Are you capable of doing much if it is?

 

[MagicaPractica]

I've had my share of hateful comments over the years. It hurt like hell when they happened, but I've also realized that they helped me learn to discern between what IS constructive criticism and just hateful comments, as well as thickening my skin a little bit.

A and a for sexnovella.

 

[Laurel]

Too often people associate constructive criticism with being mean. It happens often with the English language and how people interpret the written word that is in emotionless text. A prime example would be if someone started off their conversation with the phrases " For you information" or "Don't take this the wrong way", Hell, even "Just so you know" can be misinterpreted.

The only issues I have is trying to get a couple of my stories passed through the "EDITED" process. Other than that, I'm having a great time here on the site. ??????Kant

Awesome, great to meet you! Edits take a back seat to new stories, so please be patient.

Hey, this is a great idea.

I think some readers forget-or sadly don't care- that there are real people behind the Av's and the stories and those people have feelings.

The trolling seems to have picked up on the stories the last few months, at least it seems that way in what I see when I'm browsing and the number of newer people coming here and venting about it.

Why? Who knows, except we're living in some tough hateful times and many people get their frustration about spewing across the net. What we see here at lit is tame compared to the shit that goes on in FB and twitter and reddit.

The best thing I can tell anyone is in general there are still far more positive commens than negatives. The average score on this site seems to be in the 4 range meaning far more good votes than bad votes.

Even everyone's friend 'anymouse' leaves more positive than negative remarks.

So as my wife who is a motivational speaker, life coach says, as silly as it sounds look at the positive. And either laugh at the trolls for being the sad people they are or delete their comments as soon as you get them.

It is easy to say, but its true, this is not personal, these assholes do not know you, and I guarantee they have never had the guts-or talent-to put up a story.

Haters gonna hate and they hate, why?

Because they're jealous, so look at it that way.

You Sex Novella, won the final survivor contest.

They hate you cause they ain't you.

Perfect.

 

[Laurel]

I've had my share of hateful comments over the years. It hurt like hell when they happened, but I've also realized that they helped me learn to discern between what IS constructive criticism and just hateful comments, as well as thickening my skin a little bit.

A and a for sexnovella.

 

[Laurel]

In a case like this, have you looked into the trolling at all? As in seeing if its the same person? Are you capable of doing much if it is?

Not to derail the thread but - hecklers, critics, trolls, naysayers of any kind are a fact of life for anyone who shares their work publicly.

Oftentimes it's not the obvious "You suck! Die in a fire!" trolls that hurt a writer's confidence - it's the eloquent or at least coherent critics (the "constructive" critics) who confirm what an author fears: "You can't tell a story"; "Your characters are wooden"; "Your plotlines are cliche"; "You write exceedingly poorly".

This thread isn't about trolls. We're not going to give them the attention they crave.

This thread is about the authors - where we can say, "That's okay! Someone doesn't like your story - so what? Every author here - and every great author in history - has been told they suck, they're no good, they should quit writing. Learn from criticism, but don't let it stop you! Keep writing, keep having fun! We're all here for you!"

 

[lovecraft68]

Every author here - and every great author in history - has been told they suck, they're no good, they should quit writing. Learn from criticism, but don't let it stop you!"

Stephen King had Carrie rejected so many times he tossed it into the trash and was ready to get a real job instead of his wife supporting him while he wrote. His wife took it out of the trash and sent it in again for him and that time it was picked up.

Imagine the people who know they had that in their hands and rejected it? They must feel like that fifth Beatle.

Another little nugget about King. He was supplementing their income by writing sex stories for Cavalier magazine.

So, yes, Stephen King was once like us!

 

[oggbashan]

That is why I used to run the Authors' Hangout Last Place (tm) Contest during every themed contest.

Anyone who wanted to declare their abysmally low rating could participate. Some were reluctant to admit how badly their story had been rated - but they didn't need to join the contest.

Many of the stories that "won" the Last Place (tm) Contests were good, well-written stories with reasonable plots but for some reason were not popular with readers. The main contests are about popularity not necessarily literary ability, and among the Last Place winners were some excellent stories.

All the authors won was the esteem and awe of their fellow authors for the magnitude of the achievement.

But the Last Place (tm) Stories outlived their time. It is easier now to see the ratings of all the contest entries and work out who had the lowest rating (often, for some odd reason that was oggbashan!).

I don't write for popularity and my ratings and lack of red Hs show that, but I enjoy writing for those few people who like my work.

Even if only a small percentage of Literotica readers like an author's story, that is many more people than almost any other place on the internet.

Write for Literotica! You will get read.

 

[geronimo_appleby]

I'll start. There's an author going through a rough patch right now:
sexnovella (author page) | (forum page)

Sexnovella has been an active participant in the Survivor contests and Special contests for several years now. He is not a native English speaker, but has written dozens of English-language stories - as you can see. Writing compelling stories in one's native language is tough enough; writing in a foreign language AND submitting it publicly takes a great deal of strength and courage. He listens to readers and submits edits of stories based on their feedback. His writing has greatly improved since he began posting in 2013. I think he has a great way with words and of telling a tale.

Recently, his stories have been trolled with cruel personal insults. On top of that, despite his years at Lit, he feels he has no friends here. Finding a place on the AH can be tough. He's feeling really down, and considering quitting Literotica.

Learning to handle cruel/trolling comments and criticism is important for any writer. I think it's easier to do this when you know you have support. So I want sexnovella to know this: you are part of the AH. You do have friends here. Other authors understand what you're going through. You are not alone in this! We at Lit all here for you.

i'm not the most demonstrative in real-life, let alone here, but i'd like to extend a hand to someone who deserves some recognition.

chin up. fix bayonets and fight-through.

 

[beachbum1958]

Yup, I'm done, I've finally had enough, so scoring and comments will be disabled on all my work, some of it has already been requested for deletion, more to follow, and I won't be posting any new stuff for the foreseeable future. I doubt I'll be missed, I don't really know anyone here anyway, and I just don't have the heart to deal anymore with the torrent of snide, snarky, snotty comments and attacks-disguised-as-constructive-criticism that I seem to attract with depressing regularity; the last straw for me was some blathering half-wit who went into detail about how my work offended God and he hoped I burned in Hell yadda yadda yadda. I did tell him that as he chose a religious stance to attack me from, I would indeed turn the other cheek, just so he could kiss my ass on the other side as well, but my heart wasn't really in it, and that convinced me I'm in the wrong place and should never have come here in the first place.

I came here 5 years ago to write for fun, but it hasn't ever really been that much fun, and I've gotten to the stage where I truly don't want to submit anything I've written because I know what's going to come next; walking into the operating theatre at 3 AM on an emergency call didn't give me half the trepidation and sick butterflies that posting a new story here does, so I'm not posting any more of my work, I just don't need the grief.

 

[jomar]

That is why I used to run the Authors' Hangout Last Place (tm) Contest during every themed contest...

I am proud to say I was once a winner in your contest and if I remember correctly I won by a landslide!

 

[lovecraft68]

Yup, I'm done, I've finally had enough, so scoring and comments will be disabled on all my work, some of it has already been requested for deletion, more to follow, and I won't be posting any new stuff for the foreseeable future. I doubt I'll be missed, I don't really know anyone here anyway, and I just don't have the heart to deal anymore with the torrent of snide, snarky, snotty comments and attacks-disguised-as-constructive-criticism that I seem to attract with depressing regularity; the last straw for me was some blathering half-wit who went into detail about how my work offended God and he hoped I burned in Hell yadda yadda yadda. I did tell him that as he chose a religious stance to attack me from, I would indeed turn the other cheek, just so he could kiss my ass on the other side as well, but my heart wasn't really in it, and that convinced me I'm in the wrong place and should never have come here in the first place.

I came here 5 years ago to write for fun, but it hasn't ever really been that much fun, and I've gotten to the stage where I truly don't want to submit anything I've written because I know what's going to come next; walking into the operating theatre at 3 AM on an emergency call didn't give me half the trepidation and sick butterflies that posting a new story here does, so I'm not posting any more of my work, I just don't need the grief.

Wow, this is kind of surprising. Every one of your stories has an H and you are all over the I/T top list. In fact as far as your average score goes, you''re probably tops in the category these days.

I've met that religious nut job-unless there's more than one-I simply told him I play for the other team and his condemning sure doesn't seem to be the loving message his god is supposed to stand for. No response to that.

But we write in a squicky category. Incest and non consent are real life crime categories and they are met here with a lot of hate...but those haters never even read the stories, they blast the topic more than the author

And truth be told? Its their own self loathing because why are they in that category. People know I hate non con...know when I surf there? Never. Why? Because its not for me.

The people who show up in a category they hate and troll are pissed at themselves more than the author.

Seems like you made up your mind and I won't try to talk you out of it, but its a shame because most here would be thrilled to have had your fan base and success here.

Best of luck if you decide to stay here and if not, best of luck to you in all that you do from here.

 

[oggbashan]

I am proud to say I was once a winner in your contest and if I remember correctly I won by a landslide!

Congratulations!

I had to disqualify myself. I found winning the Last Place (tm) Contests were too easy for me.

 

[jomar]

beachbum1958, sorry you've had such a rough go but reading your profile I have to wonder if your expectations are too high.

I'd suggest you loosen up and have fun! Experiment, write in different voices in a variety of categories. Let the characters run away with the story...trust me, it was a shock, but I rolled with it and kept it up to see if I could!

Try not to let the trolls get you down and know that a lot more people likely read your stuff and like it but don't vote or comment. Then again, if you're submitting to LW...

 

[oggbashan]

...
But we write in a squicky category. Incest and non consent are real life crime categories and they are met here with a lot of hate...but those haters never even read the stories, they blast the topic more than the author

...

Yet Incest and Non-Con are the most sought after in the Looking For A Story forum.

Both categories are very popular and attract high numbers of votes. We write FICTION. Some readers never accept that concept. They think that everything we write must be real life experiences, and react as if their pet reality has been challenged if punishment is withheld.

 

[beachbum1958]

.....

 

[lovecraft68]

Yet Incest and Non-Con are the most sought after in the Looking For A Story forum.

True, but the people looking are obviously true fans of those genres. They're not the category bombers who run up and down those two places leaving "you're sick, rot in hell comments"

 

[Lori_the_Hoosier]

True, but the people looking are obviously true fans of those genres. They're not the category bombers who run up and down those two places leaving "you're sick, rot in hell comments"

Hey LC, Will's feeling kind of low right now; we're relocating to our place in France and he's not happy about going, plus I think his blood alcohol levels are too low right now; as his doctor, and because the sight of him moping around is making the dogs uneasy, they must think it's vet time, I've prescribed a couple good slugs of Kentucky White Bourbon, that should have him back in his usual place before long.

I know he does get annoyed occasionally at the witlings who uncork their idiocy at him, and once or twice he's even been a touch miffed (he's English, so he only has a limited range of emotions available to him) mostly he saves them for when he needs a laugh, or corrects their spelling and sends them back to be resubmitted (hey, if Laurel can do it...) just so he can imagine the look of complete bafflement when they open the mail, or if they're from Mr Anon, and they're more barking mad than the usual, he sends them to me so I can laugh as well.

I have no doubt once we've settled in, and he's copped a few eyefuls of the free floorshow at Juan Les Pins or Antibes, he'll be back to his usual smutty self.

Lori

 

[lovecraft68]

Hey LC, Will's feeling kind of low right now; we're relocating to our place in France and he's not happy about going, plus I think his blood alcohol levels are too low right now; as his doctor, and because the sight of him moping around is making the dogs uneasy, they must think it's vet time, I've prescribed a couple good slugs of Kentucky White Bourbon, that should have him back in his usual place before long.

I know he does get annoyed occasionally at the witlings who uncork their idiocy at him, and once or twice he's even been a touch miffed (he's English, so he only has a limited range of emotions available to him) mostly he saves them for when he needs a laugh, or corrects their spelling and sends them back to be resubmitted (hey, if Laurel can do it...) just so he can imagine the look of complete bafflement when they open the mail, or if they're from Mr Anon, and they're more barking mad than the usual, he sends them to me so I can laugh as well.

I have no doubt once we've settled in, and he's copped a few eyefuls of the free floorshow at Juan Les Pins or Antibes, he'll be back to his usual smutty self.

Lori

Thanks for the follow up.

I suggest....Jack Daniels

Friend, muse, confident and all around cure all, JD will never steer you wrong.

 

[legerdemer]

.....

Please don't delete your stories! I, for one, haven't had a chance to read them, and my guess, based on seeing your footprints here on the AH, is that I, for one, would really like them. My RL is still very much in my face, and not letting up for a while longer, so... please... don't delete. (



There's something else, more general: we all would like more love and adulation, but a good comment from someone whose writing you like and respect is worth 10-20 times the random comment from someone who just reads and hasn't spent the sweat and tears writing.

We will miss you: did I mention, don't delete your stories?

PS I now know why I haven't yet read your stories: I/T is not my first stop in erotica reading matter. But that's just me.

 

[OliviaM]

Hey, this is a great idea.

I think some readers forget-or sadly don't care- that there are real people behind the Av's and the stories and those people have feelings.

It is a great idea for a thread. This, and the "worst comment" thread are good for perspective. The thread about the worst comments reminds me of Celebrity Mean Tweets.

The trolling seems to have picked up on the stories the last few months, at least it seems that way in what I see when I'm browsing and the number of newer people coming here and venting about it.

Why? Who knows, except we're living in some tough hateful times and many people get their frustration about spewing across the net. What we see here at lit is tame compared to the shit that goes on in FB and twitter and reddit.

I thought it was just me seeing this! I've been noticing more hateful/mean comments at the end of stories I enjoyed. I wasn't sure if this was a change from before or if I'd just never noticed. It's worrying to me if this is a social trend.

The best thing I can tell anyone is in general there are still far more positive commens than negatives. The average score on this site seems to be in the 4 range meaning far more good votes than bad votes.

Even everyone's friend 'anymouse' leaves more positive than negative remarks.

So as my wife who is a motivational speaker, life coach says, as silly as it sounds look at the positive. And either laugh at the trolls for being the sad people they are or delete their comments as soon as you get them.

It is easy to say, but its true, this is not personal, these assholes do not know you, and I guarantee they have never had the guts-or talent-to put up a story.

Haters gonna hate and they hate, why?

Because they're jealous, so look at it that way.

You Sex Novella, won the final survivor contest.

They hate you cause they ain't you.

Kept for good advice above.

For me, I learn to put emotional distance between me and online comments, even good ones. I repeat a phrase to myself and step back, looking at it all in greater context.

Also, for me, the best thing I ever realized was that the people who were saying mean things were total assholes. It would hurt a lot more if some hero of mine hated me, but having someone who is already a jerk tell you you suck... that actually becomes kind of funny.