The 50 Plus Cafe, Pub, All-Nite Greasy Spoon and Dive Bar

[B2fromA2looking4U]

Catalpa tree? Never heard of such flora…beautiful flowers. If you have time B2, can you take a pic of the actual tree?

Sure. Wikipedia has a good description too

 

[likes2watchU]

Nowhere near caught up for today...
but wanted to add my Well Wishes for your mom's surgery, @HumpDayHoratio

 

[Quimpossibility]

If there's one thing I've learned from Lit it's that honesty is THE most important thing. I mean, it is in general tbh. Especially for me since I find it difficult to read subtext and subterfuge (flirting frightens me ).

Case in point. I've been chatting with someone for the past 3 weeks. Never expected anything to happen, said so right from the start. But the conversation got hot and heavy to the point where, we, last Sunday were scheduled to meet and have some fun. Now she had said ahead of time that it might not happen for genuine reasons. Well of course that was the case, which is fair enough. She even felt guilty telling me, I reassured her it wasn't her fault, and she said she was still into it. Unequivocally.

Now, two days of strained chats later and I'm asking her if we can discuss another attempt. We both seemed into it. Apparently not. TBH I had felt that something changed from Sunday. The convo, as I said, was strained. You can tell, those of us who chat online, when things change: the replies are a little more formal, a little less frequent.

It's frustrating really. I had said all along she has every right, at any point, to back out and say no. But all last week she was telling me that she wanted to do stuff, had fantasised about it, showed me pics, even asked me for a pic (you know what I mean!), in fact the meeting was her idea. It was amazing; completely unexpected and wonderful. Ok it didn't happen; that's, crushingly, life, right?

I don't think the conversation can really continue at this point. A bit like trying to put the genie back in the bottle. She has every right to refuse to meet and change her mind, but the point I'm trying to make is that you need to be honest. Every step of the way. Or folk get hurt and misunderstand things. Now I feel like I'm the bad guy, and I don't want that. I told her how I feel, and she has not responded since. Well, ok, you don't have to respond to people. That's your right. But honestly, ghosting is never cool. It's sad how things turn out, but again, you've got to be honest. It's shitty to say this, feels a little sexist even, but I feel a bit lead on. I don't know if there's anything else that's in play here; she doesn't have to tell me, but I could sense from Sunday evening that things had changed. Earlier that day, she was saying, "hey write a story about all the things we're going to do to each other, it will be really sexy for me to read." I started but quickly stopped because it felt, without anything having happened and having the meeting cancelled, that it was too intense. I don't think I'll be continuing.

In the immortal words of Jeremiah Springer: take care of yourselves, and each other.

 

[Noor]

If there's one thing I've learned from Lit it's that honesty is THE most important thing. I mean, it is in general tbh. Especially for me since I find it difficult to read subtext and subterfuge (flirting frightens me ).

Case in point. I've been chatting with someone for the past 3 weeks. Never expected anything to happen, said so right from the start. But the conversation got hot and heavy to the point where, we, last Sunday were scheduled to meet and have some fun. Now she had said ahead of time that it might not happen for genuine reasons. Well of course that was the case, which is fair enough. She even felt guilty telling me, I reassured her it wasn't her fault, and she said she was still into it. Unequivocally.

Now, two days of strained chats later and I'm asking her if we can discuss another attempt. We both seemed into it. Apparently not. TBH I had felt that something changed from Sunday. The convo, as I said, was strained. You can tell, those of us who chat online, when things change: the replies are a little more formal, a little less frequent.

It's frustrating really. I had said all along she has every right, at any point, to back out and say no. But all last week she was telling me that she wanted to do stuff, had fantasised about it, showed me pics, even asked me for a pic (you know what I mean!), in fact the meeting was her idea. It was amazing; completely unexpected and wonderful. Ok it didn't happen; that's, crushingly, life, right?

I don't think the conversation can really continue at this point. A bit like trying to put the genie back in the bottle. She has every right to refuse to meet and change her mind, but the point I'm trying to make is that you need to be honest. Every step of the way. Or folk get hurt and misunderstand things. Now I feel like I'm the bad guy, and I don't want that. I told her how I feel, and she has not responded since. Well, ok, you don't have to respond to people. That's your right. But honestly, ghosting is never cool. It's sad how things turn out, but again, you've got to be honest. It's shitty to say this, feels a little sexist even, but I feel a bit lead on. I don't know if there's anything else that's in play here; she doesn't have to tell me, but I could sense from Sunday evening that things had changed. Earlier that day, she was saying, "hey write a story about all the things we're going to do to each other, it will be really sexy for me to read." I started but quickly stopped because it felt, without anything having happened and having the meeting cancelled, that it was too intense. I don't think I'll be continuing.

In the immortal words of Jeremiah Springer: take care of yourselves, and each other.

I’m sorry, this is not unusual here.
I will meet for coffee or tea but never for sex even if they were cyber sex partners. If I really like someone, who is an available, I don’t have any sexual chat with them before meeting them and then meet for coffee/tea and see what happens later.
I’m not a good player, I don’t get hints, I have no agenda beyond a pleasant initial interaction, if there is more in the future, great, but otherwise I’ve met a nice person.
I also won’t meet anyone unless I know exact who they are and can cross check it.
Everyone I’ve met from lit has been great and I’ve met quite a few.
.

 

[Quimpossibility]

I’m sorry, this is not unusual here.

That specific situation? really?

I suppose that's not too surprising! Not sure that's a good thing.

I will meet for coffee or tea but never for sex even if they were cyber sex partners. If I really like someone, who is an available, I don’t have any sexual chat with them before meeting them and then meet for coffee/tea and see what happens later.

Initially that was the idea, but it became coffee then sexytimes somehow. Then it went from there.

She seemed really into it. TBH it feels like the context suddenly shifted after the meet fell through such that, I'm still talking as if it's a faitaccompli but she's thinking no, this is the new
non meet context, and that makes me feel like an asshole. All along I've tried to be respectful and she was kind enough to notice and complement me for it. I feel that's been trashed and that won't come back. So I suspect she isn't going to reply further and I'll just walk away.

Sad really.

I’m not a good player, I don’t get hints, I have no agenda beyond a pleasant initial interaction, if there is more in the future, great, but otherwise I’ve met a nice person.

I like to think I'm the same. I told her every step of the way that I'm super grateful for her interest and invitation, and that she can back out anytime. I meant it, as far as text messages are trustworthy I guess. Makes me wonder what would have happened had the meet gone through.

I also won’t meet anyone unless I know exact who they are and can cross check it.
Everyone I’ve met from lit has been great and I’ve met quite a few.
.

Good advice, but I think she's genuine. Not a catfish or something. Though ofc you can never really know

 

[HumpDayHoratio]

Nowhere near caught up for today...
but wanted to add my Well Wishes for your mom's surgery, @HumpDayHoratio

Thanks dear. She still has a couple of weeks to go but she’s got a couple of big procedures in the next couple of months. Thanks again for the well wishes.

 

[Missk_2022]

My Catalpa tree is blossoming and making my lawn of flowersView attachment 2548983

I have one too... the rain knocked all the blooms off

 

[Missk_2022]

Thanks dear. She still has a couple of weeks to go but she’s got a couple of big procedures in the next couple of months. Thanks again for the well wishes.

All the love to your mama

 

[Wat_Tyler]

Especially if she’s letting you in her body!

When next I see you, I'ma gonna eat your sandwich.

 

[Imbacknow935]

When next I see you, I'ma gonna eat your sandwich.

Just don't toss his salad..

 

[Wat_Tyler]

>snip<
Everyone I’ve met from lit has been great and I’ve met quite a few.
.

I think I have surpassed two dozen now and only two of them I kinda regret. That's a very solid (22K) batting average.

 

[Wat_Tyler]

She slinks over to my car window and tells me, "$50 for whatever you want, Baby."



So I respond, "have your ever changed a head gasket?"

 

[Qky75]

She slinks over to my car window and tells me, "$50 for whatever you want, Baby."



So I respond, "have your ever changed a head gasket?"

You do realize that's not what they're advertising when they offer hea.....well...in another thread perhaps

 

[Wat_Tyler]

You do realize that's not what they're advertising when they offer hea.....well...in another thread perhaps

I didn't ask her to change the tranny, so . . . .

 

[Qky75]

I didn't ask her to change the tranny, so . . . .

Wasn't the tranny already changed?

 

[Wonderer67]

When next I see you, I'ma gonna eat your sandwich.

Well this time you’ll actually buy it!

 

[Wat_Tyler]

Well this time you’ll actually buy it!

That's true.


I guess I already did eat your sandwich.


I think that I said "thank you" at the time.


I think the missus would have kicked my ankle had I not.

 

[Wonderer67]

That's true.


I guess I already did eat your sandwich.


I think that I said "thank you" at the time.


I think the missus would have kicked my ankle had I not.

Nah. She loves ya!

 

[dkak001]

If there's one thing I've learned from Lit it's that honesty is THE most important thing. I mean, it is in general tbh. Especially for me since I find it difficult to read subtext and subterfuge (flirting frightens me ).

Case in point. I've been chatting with someone for the past 3 weeks. Never expected anything to happen, said so right from the start. But the conversation got hot and heavy to the point where, we, last Sunday were scheduled to meet and have some fun. Now she had said ahead of time that it might not happen for genuine reasons. Well of course that was the case, which is fair enough. She even felt guilty telling me, I reassured her it wasn't her fault, and she said she was still into it. Unequivocally.

Now, two days of strained chats later and I'm asking her if we can discuss another attempt. We both seemed into it. Apparently not. TBH I had felt that something changed from Sunday. The convo, as I said, was strained. You can tell, those of us who chat online, when things change: the replies are a little more formal, a little less frequent.

It's frustrating really. I had said all along she has every right, at any point, to back out and say no. But all last week she was telling me that she wanted to do stuff, had fantasised about it, showed me pics, even asked me for a pic (you know what I mean!), in fact the meeting was her idea. It was amazing; completely unexpected and wonderful. Ok it didn't happen; that's, crushingly, life, right?

I don't think the conversation can really continue at this point. A bit like trying to put the genie back in the bottle. She has every right to refuse to meet and change her mind, but the point I'm trying to make is that you need to be honest. Every step of the way. Or folk get hurt and misunderstand things. Now I feel like I'm the bad guy, and I don't want that. I told her how I feel, and she has not responded since. Well, ok, you don't have to respond to people. That's your right. But honestly, ghosting is never cool. It's sad how things turn out, but again, you've got to be honest. It's shitty to say this, feels a little sexist even, but I feel a bit lead on. I don't know if there's anything else that's in play here; she doesn't have to tell me, but I could sense from Sunday evening that things had changed. Earlier that day, she was saying, "hey write a story about all the things we're going to do to each other, it will be really sexy for me to read." I started but quickly stopped because it felt, without anything having happened and having the meeting cancelled, that it was too intense. I don't think I'll be continuing.

In the immortal words of Jeremiah Springer: take care of yourselves, and each other.

Sucks dude.

I might be coming at this from a different perspective, so take this with a grain of salt as they say. I went to a university where men out numbered women 3 or 4 to 1. That's probably easily the case here as well.

What I see here very often reminds me of interactions during my university days. I may be somewhat jaded in this respect, so again this is just my perspective.

When men outnumber women it gives the women a lot of potential choices. My guess is you are probably going to run into a fair bit of the sort of stuff you describe here. If are looking for something more serious than just some flirty entertainment, it may take a lot of time to meet those people. Don't forget, for many here that on line flirting may be all they're looking for.

My advice is to just accept this for what it is, and enjoy it anyway. You can be aware of the potential outcomes, and choose not worry if things don't work out.

There are a lot of good people here. Sometimes it's just hard to connect with them. Hang in there!

 

[Wat_Tyler]

Nah. She loves ya!

She finds me amusing.


She's really too kind.

 

[HumpDayHoratio]

All the love to your mama

Thank you MissK. She has her heart procedure in July and the hysterectomy in late August. She’s got a busy summer and I get the feeling I will also! .

Least I could do!

 

[Noor]

That specific situation? really?

Yes, I think some people just get scared, but there are many married people in monogamous relationship who decide that online flirting and cyber sex isn’t cheating and fantasize taking that to real life and freak themselves out.
And some just aren’t who they say they are. So yes, we hear about this a lot and the posters defend them, but it’s the exact same thing over and over. I choose to think that most are just messed up and not intentional players.

I suppose that's not too surprising! Not sure that's a good thing.

Initially that was the idea, but it became coffee then sexytimes somehow. Then it went from there.

Yep, that’s how it goes, it’s called being swept away…

She seemed really into it. TBH it feels like the context suddenly shifted after the meet fell through such that, I'm still talking as if it's a faitaccompli but she's thinking no, this is the new
non meet context, and that makes me feel like an asshole. All along I've tried to be respectful and she was kind enough to notice and complement me for it. I feel that's been trashed and that won't come back. So I suspect she isn't going to reply further and I'll just walk away.

I’d back away for sure and when/if she returns decide if you want online sexy times realizing that is probably it and not anything more.

Sad really.

I like to think I'm the same. I told her every step of the way that I'm super grateful for her interest and invitation, and that she can back out anytime. I meant it, as far as text messages are trustworthy I guess. Makes me wonder what would have happened had the meet gone through.


Good advice, but I think she's genuine. Not a catfish or something. Though ofc you can never really know

There are many people here that do meet, some even fall in love and marry. My best advice is to go low and slow. Don’t put your energy all in one basket, it’s like anything else, it’s a combination of luck and a numbers game.
Good luck!

 

[Noor]

I think I have surpassed two dozen now and only two of them I kinda regret. That's a very solid (22K) batting average.

Well there was that really young guy who had a Jesus fixation, but he was actually nice, he just wasn’t for this non-Christian hippy girl, it took a little bit of explaining. We met at winter carnival I think and it was super cold.

 

[Wonderer67]

My Catalpa tree is blossoming and making my lawn of flowersView attachment 2548983

They are gorgeous flowering trees.

We keep the ones by our pool cut pretty close cuz their giant leaves make a good screen for nude pool fun!

 

[Wonderer67]

Sciatica. Can kiss my ass.

It sucks balls.

Sorry you’re dealing with it. It sucks (balls).