The “Manosphere” on BBC3

[Cultivateddesires]

Fascinating (albeit sad) documentary, especially as I am the father of two teenage boys.

Easy to see the conflict within what these Tate-ian Influencers are selling.

Lonely boys with no friends because they don’t talk deep things, espousing the virtue of manning (& clamming) up and not sharing feelings.

Simultaneously endlessly discussing the virtues of (and how to achieve) one’s own harem of multiple women, alongside the virtue of 100-day “semen retention programmes”.

A 16 year old who lost all his friends at school because of (largely uninformed) opinions he posted about women, breaking down in tears when he meets his online friends IRL.

Same boy paying an influencer to coach him on how to coach others to be influencers.

The structural impossibility of an economic ecosystem where you get rich by selling ways to get rich. Basically a mass-hallucinated ponzi scheme.

The inherent unfairness with a promiscuous man slagging off promiscuous women.

Men who want lots of women but also want their woman to be loving and caring towards them.


And yet.


Nothing wrong with discipline and hard work.

Nothing wrong with exercise for health.

Nothing wrong with hopes and dreams and aspirations.

Underneath it all clearly there is a need being met. What does it mean to be a man now? What did it ever? If my sons asked me, I would not have an adequate answer.

No doubt much more can be said and discussed.

 

[Mike302]

They don't have to center their lives or desires around women. They can find their own paths to fulfillment.

Also, women aren't just for intimate relationships and / or sex. They can also just be great friends. Maybe that leads to something more, maybe not. But a good friend is a good friend.

Tell them not to worry much about what other men think.

 

[Britva415]

Lonely boys with no friends because they don’t talk deep things, espousing the virtue of manning (& clamming) up and not sharing feelings.

This is so baffling that there are boys/men who still are stuck with the "boys don't cry" bullshit. In 2025 it has never been easier for men to be emotional and sensitive without being judged or queerbashed for it. Examples of open and vulnerable masculinity and the strength and success of men who can embody it are everywhere. It totally floors me.

 

[ILoveMilfs69]

Fascinating (albeit sad) documentary, especially as I am the father of two teenage boys.

Easy to see the conflict within what these Tate-ian Influencers are selling.

Lonely boys with no friends because they don’t talk deep things, espousing the virtue of manning (& clamming) up and not sharing feelings.

Simultaneously endlessly discussing the virtues of (and how to achieve) one’s own harem of multiple women, alongside the virtue of 100-day “semen retention programmes”.

A 16 year old who lost all his friends at school because of (largely uninformed) opinions he posted about women, breaking down in tears when he meets his online friends IRL.

Same boy paying an influencer to coach him on how to coach others to be influencers.

The structural impossibility of an economic ecosystem where you get rich by selling ways to get rich. Basically a mass-hallucinated ponzi scheme.

The inherent unfairness with a promiscuous man slagging off promiscuous women.

Men who want lots of women but also want their woman to be loving and caring towards them.


And yet.


Nothing wrong with discipline and hard work.

Nothing wrong with exercise for health.

Nothing wrong with hopes and dreams and aspirations.

Underneath it all clearly there is a need being met. What does it mean to be a man now? What did it ever? If my sons asked me, I would not have an adequate answer.

No doubt much more can be said and discussed.

Tate is not the cause, he's the effect. The effect of a society that for the last 100 or so years has almost completely forgotten about men because they were so busy uplifting women.

In an era where men are constantly told they're not good enough if they don't work hard in service for other people, be it their partner, family, community or nation, Tate tells men that it's okay to look out for yourself. So that makes lonely men feel heard. If you want figures like Tate to go away, start by earnestly helping boys grow in a manner that is NOT in service to other people. Let them learn and look out for themselves.

This is so baffling that there are boys/men who still are stuck with the "boys don't cry" bullshit. In 2025 it has never been easier for men to be emotional and sensitive without being judged or queerbashed for it. Examples of open and vulnerable masculinity and the strength and success of men who can embody it are everywhere. It totally floors me.

This is a complete lie. There are very few people who won't judge a man for crying. A man crying signals weakness, and we know how everyone loves to kick someone when they're down. I'm not saying this is how it should be, just that this is how it is. You can especially never open up to women, unless they're blood related - your mother or your sister. If you open up to your wife/gf, she's going to get the "ick" and possibly use that vulnerability against you in an argument in the future.

 

[Britva415]

This is a complete lie.

It's my perception. I don't have this perception because people lied to me about it, I have it because I see it and I live it.

So you must be calling ME a liar.

Real classy

 

[ILoveMilfs69]

It's my perception. I don't have this perception because people lied to me about it, I have it because I see it.

So you must be calling ME a liar.

Real classy

No, your experience might be real and true. I'm saying that it does not reflect the general consensus accurately. Don't take everything so personally.

 

[Britva415]

Don't take everything so personally

If you didn't mean "that's a complete lie," but said it anyway, then that's just disrespectful. It's hard to imagine you weren't trying to be provocative.

 

[ILoveMilfs69]

If you didn't mean "that's a complete lie," but said it anyway, then that's just disrespectful. It's hard to imagine you weren't trying to be provocative.

You may feel that way because you're trying to be antagonistic. Given the context of this discussion, there's no need to bring up personal anecdotes in the first place. We're talking about broad social trends, not individual experiences.

 

[Britva415]

you're trying to be antagonistic

By saying I'm baffled and surprised.

fgs, you're just one "assume-bad-faith" after another, aren't you.

 

[ILoveMilfs69]

By saying I'm baffled and surprised.

fgs, you're just one "assume-bad-faith" after another, aren't you.

No because you've made 3 posts just arguing with me about trivial bullshit. Are you gonna get back to the topic at hand or just keep going in circles about this?

 

[Lazaran]

Tate is not the cause, he's the effect. The effect of a society that for the last 100 or so years has almost completely forgotten about men because they were so busy uplifting women.

Seriously???



BWAHAHAHA…HA.



GTFOH

 

[ILoveMilfs69]

Seriously???



BWAHAHAHA…HA.



GTFOH

Truth hurts sweaty I know

 

[Lazaran]

Truth hurts sweaty I know

Since 1925, society has forgotten about men…

BWAHAHAHA…HA.

Now do hetero white men… (Note: I’m a solidly hetero white man)



Again:

GTFOH

 

[ILoveMilfs69]

Since 1925, society has forgotten about men…

BWAHAHAHA…HA.

Now do hetero white men… (Note: I’m a solidly hetero white man)



Again:

GTFOH

I don't care if you're an alien or not, it does not change the objective truth.

And since you're being so rude on a discussion post, I'm just going to ignore you. You're not worth replying to.

 

[Lazaran]

I don't care if you're an alien or not, it does not change the objective truth.

And since you're being so rude on a discussion post, I'm just going to ignore you. You're not worth replying to.

An alt of a right-wing troll is going to put me on ignore…

BWAHAHAHA…HA.



GTFOH

 

[Cultivateddesires]

. If you open up to your wife/gf, she's going to get the "ick" and possibly use that vulnerability against you in an argument in the future.

This is a sad statement. FWIW this does not apply to my marriage

I can imagine this in the context of a relatively young relationship with, dare I say, an immature lady.

I would concur with the sentiment that men being mentally vulnerable is not a universally accepted trait. Despite the mainstream media and the UK Royal Family and other celebs, we are a long way from men being fully in touch with their emotions.

My point was the painful contradiction for this kid between the “manly” suppression of it his peer group expected and his lived reality of feeling upset when apart from that group.