Texas Roll Call 3

[dagdag]

Good morning Texas!

 

[sunbunny3]

Good morning Texas!

 

[wtex]

Good Super Bowl Sunday

Good morning Texas!

Tail-gating from the confines of my recliner.

 

[curiousdreamer51]

Morning all. It is only -6 F here with a half a foot of snow. Plane carru s me home Thursday. I suspect Texas will be warmer. I am also looking forward to warm arms and legs to snuggle with...

 

[Lollygirl26]

Good morning Texans. Happy Sunday to all. Anyone else having a Super Bowl Party?? Tons of food and drinky drinks here. Come one cum all.

 

[wtex]

Pizza, Crown, and the dog and me here. We are all set!

Hope everyone has a great Super Bowl.....

 

[GarrettTX1]

Howdy everyone & had a friend email me this funny ole Texas Monthly Article (link) "More Colorful Texas Sayings…622 Wise and Witty Ways to talk Texan." so thought I'd share some of them here (all of them in the link...) to see how many of these us Texas folks still use.

We asked twelve renowned artists to illustrate their favorite Texas sayings, and we present as well a sample of other axioms and adages common to the state—a collection of sayings as big as all hell and half of Texas.

ACCEPTABLE
It’s better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.
Might as well. Can’t dance, never could sing, and it’s too wet to plow.
I could sit still for that.

BOASTFUL
He can strut sitting down.
He’s all hat and no cattle.
She’s all gurgle and no guts.
He chamber-of-commerced it.

DISHONEST
He’s on a first-name basis with the bottom of the deck.
There are a lot of nooses in his family tree.
So crooked that if he swallowed a nail he’d spit up a corkscrew.
He knows more ways to take your money than a roomful of lawyers.
Crooked as a dog’s hind leg.
Slicker than a slop jar.
More twists than a pretzel factory.
So crooked he has to unscrew his britches at night.
She’s more slippery than a pocketful of pudding.

HONEST
If that ain’t a fact, God’s a possum.
You can hang your hat on it.
He’s so honest you could shoot craps with him over the phone.
If I say a hen dips snuff, you can look under her wing for the can.

BRAVE
Brave enough to eat in a boomtown cafe.
He’s double-backboned.
He’s got more guts than you could hang on a fence.
He’d shoot craps with the devil himself.
She’d charge hell with a bucket of ice water.

ARGUMENTATIVE, MAD
She could start a fight in an empty house.
He’d argue with a wooden Indian.
She raised hell and stuck a chunk under it.
He’s the only hell his mama ever raised.
He’s got his tail up.
She’s in a horn-tossing mood.
She’s so contrary she floats up-stream.
She’s dancing in the hog trough.

TIMID
He stays in the shadow of his mama’s apron.
If he was melted down, he couldn’t be poured into a fight.
He wouldn’t bite a biscuit.
He’s yellow as mustard but without the bite.
He may not be a chicken, but he has his henhouse ways.

 

[GarrettTX1]

Continued to split up sum space

DRY
So dry the birds are building their nests out of barbed wire.
So dry the Baptists are sprinkling, the Methodists are spitting, and the Catholics are giving rain checks.
So dry the trees are bribing the dogs.
So dry my duck don’t know how to swim.
It’s been dry so long, we only got a quarter-inch of rain during Noah’s Flood.
So dry I’m spitting cotton.
Dry as a powder house.

BUSY
He’s so busy you’d think he was twins.
Busy as a one-legged man at an ass-kicking convention.
Busy as a funeral home fan in July.
Busy as a one-eyed dog in a smokehouse.
Busy as a one-armed paperhanger.
Busy as a stump-tailed bull in fly season.
Got to slop the hogs, dig the well, and plow the south forty before breakfast.
She’s jumping like hot grease (or water) on a skillet.
Panting like a lizard on a hot rock.
No grass growing under her feet.

UNSOPHISTICATED
Just fell off the turnip (watermelon, tater) truck.
He’s so country he thinks a seven-course meal is a possum and a six-pack.
They lived so far our in the country that the sun set between their house and town.

CAPABLE, EXPERIENCED
She’s got some snap in her garters.
He’s got plenty of arrows in his quiver.
He’s got plenty of notches on his gun.
She’s a right smart windmill fixer.
He could find a whisper in a whirlwind.
There’s no slack in her rope.
He’s a three-jump cowboy.
If she crows, the sun is up.
This ain’t my first rodeo.

GENERAL ADVICE
Pigs get fat; hogs get slaughtered.
Never sign nothing by neon.
Just because a chicken has wings don’t mean it can fly.
Keep your saddle oiled and your gun greased.
If you cut your own firewood, it’ll warm you twice.
Give me the bacon without the sizzle.
Don’t hang your wash on someone else’s line.
Don’t snap my garters.
A guilty fox hunts his own hole.
Quit hollering down the rain.
Don’t rile the wagon master.
The barn door’s open and the mule’s trying to run. (Your fly’s down.)
Don’t get all her up about it.
Skin your own buffalo.
You better

 

[iamincognito45]

Who's watching the Super Bow?

John Legend singing America the Beautiful was fantastic.

Idina Menzel’s National Anthem was amazing.

Will be making my famous hot pork tamale nachos right before halftime. Who wants some?!

 

[newbiebabe]

Who's watching the Super Bow?

John Legend singing America the Beautiful was fantastic.

Idina Menzel’s National Anthem was amazing.

Will be making my famous hot pork tamale nachos right before halftime. Who wants some?!

I agree ... except for those nachos.. gives me heartburn just reading about them. lol

 

[Lollygirl26]

Who's watching the Super Bow?

John Legend singing America the Beautiful was fantastic.

Idina Menzel’s National Anthem was amazing.

Will be making my famous hot pork tamale nachos right before halftime. Who wants some?!

Me me. I do

 

[1sickbastard]

Who's watching the Super Bow?

John Legend singing America the Beautiful was fantastic.

Idina Menzel’s National Anthem was amazing.

Will be making my famous hot pork tamale nachos right before halftime. Who wants some?!

I just have the tamales, if you don't mind.

 

[iamincognito45]

I agree ... except for those nachos.. gives me heartburn just reading about them. lol

No worries, I also have fresh made guacamole
.

Me me. I do

Excellent. I have plenty!

I just have the tamales, if you don't mind.

Well ok. You don't know what you are missing but I do have plenty of tamales. Along with cold beer and vodka for those interested...

 

[newbiebabe]

Wow.. that Nationwide commercial...

 

[wtex]

OOhhh people are here. I was thinking everyone was glued to the game.

Plenty to eat here.... Have been snacking and the pizza delivery is during halftime.

More than enough Crown to get me through the night. I am a sipper.

Your tamales sound good newbiebabe, let me know if you have leftovers.

Lolly, who are you rooting for. Be sure and shake your pom-poms.

 

[Lollygirl26]

Wow.. that Nationwide commercial...

Exactly. I've been disappointed with most.

 

[1sickbastard]

No worries, I also have fresh made guacamole
.


Excellent. I have plenty!



Well ok. You don't know what you are missing but I do have plenty of tamales. Along with cold beer and vodka for those interested...

A good tamale is a reward unto itself. So is good guacamole.

 

[newbiebabe]

Exactly. I've been disappointed with most.

lol.. okay the Fiat was funny..

 

[Lollygirl26]

Fiat one was funny

 

[1sickbastard]

So, now that Disney has turned a couple of it's rides into movies, is now going to turn an entire section of their parks into a movie: Tomorrow Land (world, whatever).

 

[newbiebabe]

Okay not sure about Katie's dress but that lion was awesome!

 

[newbiebabe]

Is everyone out eating Incognito's nachos now? Geez it's got quiet in here!

 

[JennyNo1]

*comes in with my mouth full of nachos and a beer in hand* Boy, I'm glad I stopped by 'cognito's on the way in!

 

[newbiebabe]

*comes in with my mouth full of nachos and a beer in hand* Boy, I'm glad I stopped by 'cognito's on the way in!

*hands Jenny the Tums bottle* You're probably gonna need these later...

 

[wtex]

The pizza was delicious, and the Crown was..........well, Crown!

Seattle doing what they did in their playoff games......not play well in first half, then kick butt in the second half.