Tattooed Cocks--How in Hell Does That Even Work?

[SlickTony]

Someone might have posted this in the AH where I usually hang out, but I decided to put this in here because it's so very much a how-to question.

This story is about a doctor who's in deep shit for photographing the tattooed dick of the patient he ws performing a procedure on. It has "Hot
Rod" tattooed on it

http://http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071220/ap_on_fe_st/odd_tattoo_photo;_ylt=AlCu.GPg2Z.vk566QLOkpEwuQE4F

Thinking of this, plus the Wendy joke, I can't help wondering about the physiological aspects of something like this. I mean, I have 3 tattoos myself, but none of the surfaces had to be maintained by hydraulic force.

I asked the cock owner on the premises, but since he has never had a tattoo, either there or anywhere else, he couldn't tell me anything.

Guys....?

 

[mjl2010]

First of all, the link doesn't work.
Second of all, which Wendy's joke?

Lastly, what exactly is your question?

MJL

 

[necroerotica]

First of all, the link doesn't work.
Second of all, which Wendy's joke?

Lastly, what exactly is your question?

MJL

From what I gather - how exactly do you physically get a tattoo on the penis - especially given it's, well, flexible nature

Short answer - I have no idea.

I'd *imagine* that it's perfored while flacid, with the skin pulled tight/stretched, so it looks right when the penis is hard.

I know pain isn't really my thing, but I'm guessing it's take a *lot* of willpower to maintain an erection under those circumstances.

Or else the tattoist would have to be a *seriously* hot example of your chosen gender....

 

[SlickTony]

The Wendy Joke

So there's this guy, see, and he loves his girlfriend Wendy. Loves her so much, see, that he has her name tattooed on his, um, unit.

Ultimately, they marry, and go on a honeymoon in Jamaica.

Shortly after their arrival, the guy is in a public restroom and happens to notice that the strapping young Jamaican at the next urinal has the very same tattoo on his, um, unit.

Fighting back paranoid suspicions about Wendy's fidelity, but unable to suppress his curiosity about the coincidence, he addresses to the Strapping Young Jamaican man as follows: "Hey, I couldn't help noticing that you have the name 'WENDY' tattooed on your, um, unit."

Whereupon the Strapping Young Jamaican laughs and says, "Noooo, mon. Mine actually says 'WELCOME TO JAMAICA, HAVE A NICE DAY.'"

 

[littlebitshe]

First of all, the link doesn't work.
Second of all, which Wendy's joke?

Lastly, what exactly is your question?

MJL

CORRECT URL:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071220/ap_on_fe_st/odd_tattoo_photo;_ylt=AlCu.GPg2Z.vk566QLOkpEwuQE4F

 

[mjl2010]

Maybe you get yourself hard and then snug up a strap around the base to keep it hard.

I can't imagine it though. There's no way I'd do it.

I'm no chicken and can handle a fair amount of pain, but tattoo my dick? Uh uh.

MJL

 

[Anhedonic]

I dunno man. I'm thinking I could do it. The question for me that would have to be answered before doing so is "Why"?

 

[sunandshadow]

Here's a whole page of dick tattoo photos, so it must be possible somehow. http://nakedworkshops2.blogspot.com/2007/07/dick-tattoo.html
Personally I *adore* the dragon.

 

[SlickTony]

Silly me, I had forgotten all about cock rings and other forms of ligature, even though I am quite familiar with them. Still, all that pain? Well, it might even be a kick for some people....

 

[Chicklet]

http://www.lavenderlounge.com/blog/images/dragon4.jpg

this is by far the most fantastic i've ever seen

 

[SlickTony]

http://www.lavenderlounge.com/blog/images/dragon4.jpg

this is by far the most fantastic i've ever seen

Truly astounding. It's so pretty, you wonder he ever has the desire to hide it anywhere.

 

[fieryjen]

As a piece of art, I agree that dragon tattoo is truly amazing. Though it's to the point where sex would just be strange. I'd constantly be thinking of it as "the dragon's head" entering me, ya know?

 

[emap]

I gotta go with Fiery on this one, if my guy was going to go and get a tattoo there I would have to beat him over the head for even thinking it.

I do like tattoos on occassion, but there is just too darn weird. I'd probably make a new lover with a tattoo there to put on a not see through condom so I don't have to watch whatever he put there entering me.

 

[bobinks]

So there's this guy, see, and he loves his girlfriend Wendy. Loves her so much, see, that he has her name tattooed on his, um, unit.

Ultimately, they marry, and go on a honeymoon in Jamaica.

Shortly after their arrival, the guy is in a public restroom and happens to notice that the strapping young Jamaican at the next urinal has the very same tattoo on his, um, unit.

Fighting back paranoid suspicions about Wendy's fidelity, but unable to suppress his curiosity about the coincidence, he addresses to the Strapping Young Jamaican man as follows: "Hey, I couldn't help noticing that you have the name 'WENDY' tattooed on your, um, unit."

Whereupon the Strapping Young Jamaican laughs and says, "Noooo, mon. Mine actually says 'WELCOME TO JAMAICA, HAVE A NICE DAY.'"

Slicktony got the punch line right, but the delivery is off.

When the guy is flacid, the tatoo on his penis shows "WY". When he is erect, it says, "Wendy".

At the urinal, he looks at the guy standing next to him and notices that he has "WY" tatooed on his flacid penis too...

 

[BlowjobQueen]

That dragon is amazing! Although, I wonder how long you have to avoid sex, atleast a month I would think....

 

[Not Normal]

Those tattoos are pretty impressive, but totally freaky. I don't get dick tattoos or piercing.

 

[Jagged]

With the pain and bleeding I endured for the few I have on more traditional places...(my arms) I couldn't imagine dealing with the pain down there.

Also find an artist who is comfortable with the idea of holding your junk to do that kind of dealed work.

 

[kimbernee]

Same as a doctor. "Holding your junk" is a mechanical action for people who aren't phobic.

 

[fieryjen]

I gotta go with Fiery on this one, if my guy was going to go and get a tattoo there I would have to beat him over the head for even thinking it.

I do like tattoos on occassion, but there is just too darn weird. I'd probably make a new lover with a tattoo there to put on a not see through condom so I don't have to watch whatever he put there entering me.

I think it would depend on what sort of tattoo a man had. I'm not a fan of them myself, and I'd be quite upset if my husband decided to get one. Though theoretically, I could handle a cock with some writing on it, or something of the sort. But that dragon... it's just so overwhelming that the body part it's on just gets completely overshadowed by it. To me, it doesn't really look like a cock anymore, and that's the part that would weird me out.

 

[Dreamliner]

A mate of mine had a tattoo on his penis done. it was a stylised eagle, on the top of the penis with the wings folding down under. He had a bit of colour in with it, told the boys that it hurt heaps having it done.

He commented that woman were always fascinated by the tattoo there and none had mentioned anything negative.

The dragon looks awesome, but for me, no thanks.

 

[kajira311]

Cock tats and piercings and mods, oh my

Are just an excuse to whip the fucker out to show it off.

 

[SweetMerry]

As I don't have a tattoo, I can't even imagine the pain of having one done on your dick. *ouch*

I know a nurse, though, that told me a story about a guy that she was prepping for surgery. When she uncovered him, he had a tattoo of a rose on his head. She was so surprised that she forgot herself for a moment and asked him if it hurt when he got it done. His reply? "I don't know. I was so drunk when it happened, I don't even remember."

Not remember? I mean, it must have hurt for days (or weeks, or whatever.) Wow.

 

[angle1984]

http://www.lavenderlounge.com/blog/images/dragon4.jpg

this is by far the most fantastic i've ever seen

I've admirred this picture for a couple years now. It's really good work, especially considering where it's located

 

[temp256]

I'd never want a tattoo, but I do have the urge to get out a set of permanent markers...

 

[albertaboy]

I've admirred this picture for a couple years now. It's really good work, especially considering where it's located

I wonder what it looks like soft.