Taraka!!!

[entitled]

Worry not. I can take whatever you're dishing out.

If you say so Lefty.

 

[Taraka]

If you say so Lefty.

Touche. So how's your bladder feeling today?

 

[entitled]

Touche. So how's your bladder feeling today?

Nice and healed. We need to fix that.

 

[Taraka]

Nice and healed. We need to fix that.

You know my motto. "Never too tired. Never too busy."

 

[entitled]

You know my motto. "Never too tired. Never too busy."

Then there's me...

We'll have to see if i'm able to get there on Tuesday.

 

[entitled]

Come vent at me. i know you need it.

 

[Taraka]

Come vent at me. i know you need it.

And what shall I vent about? There are so many perfectly good things for me to vent about, how can I choose just one?

 

[entitled]

And what shall I vent about? There are so many perfectly good things for me to vent about, how can I choose just one?

Pick one.

 

[Taraka]

Rant On!

Pick one.

Ok. Celery. I freaking hate celery. I've hated it all my life. Back in kindergarten they used to give us celery sticks with either pimento cheese or peanut butter on them. The other kids ate them. They liked them. I licked the stuff off and threw the celery in the trash. My teacher even told me it was good and I should try it. I told her I had tried it and didn't like it. She made me try it again in front of her. I took a bite, my face contorted, and I spit it into the trashcan. She shrugged and relented and never tried to make me eat the stuff again.

Now don't get me wrong. I like vegetables. I like almost everything. It's just celery. So far as my tastebuds are concerned it's "Evil Vegetable." Celery, much like artificial sweetener, is a Tool of Satan. (I'm much more convinced of this than I am in the actual existence of Satan.)

But the Chinese, on the other hand, they seem to love this horrid crunchy water and string abomination. How do I know this? Because they put it in stir-fry! Ordinarily this is not a problem as I eat Chinese food at a buffet and it's easy to tell what has Evil Vegetable and what doesn't. Even if everything else in a dish is stuff I love, I'll pass it by if it's got that vexacious weed interspersed within.

But here is the rub. I have discovered the joy of Chinese take out. I finally live in an area that has this wonderful service. And time and again I have ordered Chinese food and been very pleased with what I got. Naturally, I've always avoided concoctions that I know frequently come with that festering and fetid fibrous monstrosity.

But last Friday I got adventurous. (As I often do.) I decided to try something new off the menu and ordered "Eight Precious Wonders." This stuff sounded fantastic. Shrimp, pork, chicken, beef, mushroom, and I forget what else was on the list, but it was all stuff I like. Having all of it together sounded like a great idea!

But the number of ingredients was not actually eight. Oh no. It was NINE! Without listing it on the menu, they had decided it needed a certain "bonus" feature. Yep. You guessed it. Celery. It was chock full of the stuff.

Of course, I had ordered it. I had already paid for it. So I emptied the contents of the little cardboard container into a large bowl and then carefully and meticulously, with chopsticks, sorted through it and removed each and every little bit of chunchy culinary horror. Back into the box from which it came, it went! And not long from there to the trash. Then, finally, with a healthy dosage of soy sauce I enjoyed my meal.

So it would seem that the Chinese love celery SO MUCH, that they don't even think it needs to be listed with the other ingredients. It's just a bonus you should thank them for. That means that from now on, if I order something I've never had before, I must brace myself for the possibility that it will be tainted by that dread bilious veridian abomination which has plagued me from the earliest days of my vanished youth.

Just remember Ent, you asked me to rant.

 

[SummerMorning]

Ok ... rant about King Kong then.

 

[entitled]

Ok. Celery. I freaking hate celery.

Just remember Ent, you asked me to rant.

Right. i keep celery away from you and you keep asparagus away from me, and we'll both be a little more happy.

 

[RomanticLass73]

Ok. Celery. I freaking hate celery.

Just remember Ent, you asked me to rant.

Hahahahahahahahaha Hehehehehehehehehehe
*stops to catch breath*
Oh my. You DO hate celery.
*still have great big smile on my face*
And you hate it so very entertainingly!! Hate something else.... please?

 

[RomanticLass73]

Right. i keep celery away from you and you keep asparagus away from me, and we'll both be a little more happy.

Just slide any sneaky stray asparagus onto my plate, I love the stuff!

 

[entitled]

Hahahahahahahahaha Hehehehehehehehehehe
*stops to catch breath*
Oh my. You DO hate celery.
*still have great big smile on my face*
And you hate it so very entertainingly!! Hate something else.... please?

Now you see part of why i like him.

 

[entitled]

Just slide any sneaky stray asparagus onto my plate, I love the stuff!

You can have it!

i used to love it to death. In fact, there was a patch in the yard of one place we lived while i was growing up, and i'd go out and pick it and eat it raw. Just sitting out in the garden. Guess i just ate too much and got tired of it.

 

[RomanticLass73]

Now you see part of why i like him.

Oh yes. Quite the clever boy, he is. I approve

 

[RomanticLass73]

You can have it!

i used to love it to death. In fact, there was a patch in the yard of one place we lived while i was growing up, and i'd go out and pick it and eat it raw. Just sitting out in the garden. Guess i just ate too much and got tired of it.

Guess so... didn't know that was possible!

 

[entitled]

Oh yes. Quite the clever boy, he is. I approve

Hey, if they can't run mental circles around me every once in a while, what's the point. Yanno?

Yes, it's entirely possible. The RA did that with peanut butter. Ate it until he got sick. Now peanut butter isn't supposed to enter the house because just the smell makes him physically ill.

 

[zeb1094]

Hey, if they can't run mental circles around me every once in a while, what's the point. Yanno?

Yes, it's entirely possible. The RA did that with peanut butter. Ate it until he got sick. Now peanut butter isn't supposed to enter the house because just the smell makes him physically ill.

That happened with me and Southern Comfort. Yuck to all liquor now!

 

[RomanticLass73]

Hey, if they can't run mental circles around me every once in a while, what's the point. Yanno?

Yes, it's entirely possible. The RA did that with peanut butter. Ate it until he got sick. Now peanut butter isn't supposed to enter the house because just the smell makes him physically ill.

I do know... and throughly agree

Sounds like today would be a good day to wave an open jar of peanut butter under RA's nose in punishment.

 

[entitled]

That happened with me and Southern Comfort. Yuck to all liquor now!

i did that with Jack Daniels. Can't touch corn liquor now. Everything else? Welll....

 

[entitled]

I do know... and throughly agree

Sounds like today would be a good day to wave an open jar of peanut butter under RA's nose in punishment.

Cause you're smart.

Nah. If he really does get fired, they'll find parts halfway across the county. And he knows it. Sometimes it's good to be part barbarian.

 

[zeb1094]

i did that with Jack Daniels. Can't touch corn liquor now. Everything else? Welll....

I just quit drinking after a bad experience with Gin and Seven-Up! Now only a beer every once in a while. Like once a year!

 

[RomanticLass73]

Cause you're smart.

Hehe. I have my moments, yup

Nah. If he really does get fired, they'll find parts halfway across the county. And he knows it. Sometimes it's good to be part barbarian.

Amen. Preach it sister.

 

[entitled]

Hehe. I have my moments, yup

Amazing, ain't it?

Amen. Preach it sister.

Pfffftttt... You know i don't preach. i get out the big stick.