Taming of the Shrew

[Guru]

HORTENSIO


Why, no; for she hath broke the lute to me.
I did but tell her she mistook her frets,
And bow'd her hand to teach her fingering;
When, with a most impatient devilish spirit,
'Frets, call you these?' quoth she; 'I'll fume
with them:'
And, with that word, she struck me on the head,
And through the instrument my pate made way;
And there I stood amazed for a while,
As on a pillory, looking through the lute;
While she did call me rascal fiddler
And twangling Jack; with twenty such vile terms,
As had she studied to misuse me so.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


Now, by the world, it is a lusty wench;
I love her ten times more than e'er I did:
O, how I long to have some chat with her!

 

[Guru]

BAPTISTA


Well, go with me and be not so discomfited:
Proceed in practise with my younger daughter;
She's apt to learn and thankful for good turns.
Signior Petruchio, will you go with us,
Or shall I send my daughter Kate to you?

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


I pray you do.

Exeunt all but PETRUCHIO

I will attend her here,
And woo her with some spirit when she comes.
Say that she rail; why then I'll tell her plain
She sings as sweetly as a nightingale:
Say that she frown, I'll say she looks as clear
As morning roses newly wash'd with dew:
Say she be mute and will not speak a word;
Then I'll commend her volubility,
And say she uttereth piercing eloquence:
If she do bid me pack, I'll give her thanks,
As though she bid me stay by her a week:
If she deny to wed, I'll crave the day
When I shall ask the banns and when be married.
But here she comes; and now, Petruchio, speak.

Enter KATHARINA

Good morrow, Kate; for that's your name, I hear.

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


Well have you heard, but something hard of hearing:
They call me Katharina that do talk of me.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


You lie, in faith; for you are call'd plain Kate,
And bonny Kate and sometimes Kate the curst;
But Kate, the prettiest Kate in Christendom
Kate of Kate Hall, my super-dainty Kate,
For dainties are all Kates, and therefore, Kate,
Take this of me, Kate of my consolation;
Hearing thy mildness praised in every town,
Thy virtues spoke of, and thy beauty sounded,
Yet not so deeply as to thee belongs,
Myself am moved to woo thee for my wife.

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


Moved! in good time: let him that moved you hither
Remove you hence: I knew you at the first
You were a moveable.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


Why, what's a moveable?

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


A join'd-stool.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


Thou hast hit it: come, sit on me.

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


Asses are made to bear, and so are you.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


Women are made to bear, and so are you.

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


No such jade as you, if me you mean.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


Alas! good Kate, I will not burden thee;
For, knowing thee to be but young and light--

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


Too light for such a swain as you to catch;
And yet as heavy as my weight should be.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


Should be! should--buzz!

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


Well ta'en, and like a buzzard.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


O slow-wing'd turtle! shall a buzzard take thee?

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


Ay, for a turtle, as he takes a buzzard.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


Come, come, you wasp; i' faith, you are too angry.

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


If I be waspish, best beware my sting.

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


My remedy is then, to pluck it out.

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


Ay, if the fool could find it where it lies,

 

[Guru]

PETRUCHIO


Who knows not where a wasp does
wear his sting? In his tail.

 

[Guru]

KATHARINA


In his tongue.