Suggestions for a working sub?

[11_22_09]

First post! Hello!

I’m hoping to get some suggestions from those of you experienced with dominating men.

A little background for you. My husband and I consider ourselves to be switches with me being more naturally submissive and him more naturally dominant. Neither one of us has a lot of experience with bdsm or whatever you want to label us as, but we’ve experimented with heaps of different things. Since we do this as more play rather than lifestyle, we like to give it our best shot at reversing roles even though we both struggle a little with it. He’s very much a manly, tough, assertive type of guy to the outside world, but can go completely the other way in our play. We’re very much into anal. We use a strap on just as often as we have regular sex. He’s had experiences with other men in the past, but we still like to pretend that it’s a “forced” thing. (However, we do keep that to just pretending. I don't share my ho ) He’s also really into feminization. He has his own panties, lingerie, girly outfits, and makeup. A little humiliation here and there, and also some pain and light bondage. Some general rules for him when it’s my turn to be the boss is that he must always carry lip gloss and use it often, sit down to pee, ask permission before going anywhere, eat/drink what I allow, wear what I leave out for him, address me a certain way and all the normal hoopla. The thing he has the most trouble with is questioning me or essentially topping from the bottom I guess you could say. He doesn't do it intentionally, and he has high hopes that he will eventually learn to just shut up. I’m a stay at home mom, and we do a lot of our play via cell phone. While he can’t dress up or do anything too obvious at work, we still very much enjoy the control/trust aspects you get from not-too-far-away long distance play.

My problem is that I’m finding it increasingly more difficult to come up with tasks or challenges to give him while he’s at work. I’ve Googled it. Didn’t find anything relevant or realistic for us.

And while I’m at it, does anyone know of a cost effective, DECENT chastity device?

Kudos if you read all that!

 

[orlandom]

obedient husband

You can make him wear panties to work.It would also be a turn on to him if you would tell him to go into the bathroom and insert a butt plug in his ass.No lube make him stick it in his mouth and then put it in.Also tell him he is forbidden to masturbate untill he gets home.

 

[NaughtyRedSiren]

or make him masturbate in those panties at work... on command... being at work is difficult during play... hope you find a solution!

 

[Stella_Omega]

Depending on what his job is though-- and you would know better than anyone here-- it might be best for the job if his mind was on it, rather than his johnson...

A lot of us simply don't play during working hours.

 

[NaughtyRedSiren]

Depending on what his job is though-- and you would know better than anyone here-- it might be best for the job if his mind was on it, rather than his johnson...

A lot of us simply don't play during working hours.

Hahaha... You are a wise one indeed as always, Stella .... Although a distraction is sometimes fun at work... unless you are an EMT for example... then, that's bad ju ju!

 

[SissyKatie]

A lot of us simply don't play during working hours.

All too true I think.

The most adventurous I have been was when a girlfriend asked me to wear panties and a chain with a little heart on it to work. I was not in much if any danger of being discovered, but it just doesn't work when you have to get into a certain persona in situations. Overall... it was mostly just forgotten during the day.

But as also said above, it could be very different depending on a persons work. I was in a very large office surrounded by people almost constantly.

Not a lot of room for erotica there.

 

[knot_sweet]

I agree with Stella and SissyKatie that work hours are not the time for play.

That said, setting up a toilet break schedule is probably the easiest, least obtrusive way to micro manage during work hours.

I've had this done to me in the past and found that it doesn't distract from work much. It gets more interesting if you miss an alloted time and have to ask permission to go off schedule.

You could also use wardrobe control as a tool. Lay out clothes that won't draw negative attention from colleagues, but that you know he doesn't like. Something like a men's shirt that has a subtle floral pattern. If you're feeling a little more brave, women's plain shirts are often largely indistinguishable from men's shirts.

You could also get him to wear stockings / pantyhose under his trousers.

Good luck and I hope you find a workable solution.

 

[Primalex]

My problem is that I’m finding it increasingly more difficult to come up with tasks or challenges to give him while he’s at work. I’ve Googled it. Didn’t find anything relevant or realistic for us.

Wrong road. It's next to impossible to come up with ideas for the next 30 years. And when it starts to become tedious, it's best to focus on something else for some time.