sub AND dom?

[Emdash]

I am a female, and...

I find myself to be an extreme sub when it comes to men. I don't desire a lick of control. I want to be bound and choked. I want him to hold me down and be as rough as he needs. I want him to finish first - on me, in me, wherever.

But with girls, I want them to writhe under me. I know how to make them come and I want them to beg me for it (maybe because I know how that feels?) I want to bite their lips and pull their hair and bite their necks.

And I'm confused by my own dichotomy. Anyone else share my predicament?

 

[Malich]

That is what we call being a switch. There's hundreds on here i am sure.

 

[Stella_Omega]

For many of us, our impulse to dominate or submit depends on the situation, and the people we are with.

 

[Collar_N_Cuffs]

Yes, this is exactly what I experience, sub tendencies with men and Domme tendencies with women, though there are times and situations and people that don't fit this pattern. I don't try to analyze it, to be truthful, I just enjoy it.

What in particular is bothering you? Is it because you think you're doing it wrong? Should be totally one or the other? Because you don't need to declare yourself and then join the sub or Domme ranks and stay there. .. Or is it something else that is bothering you? If so, maybe you can specify and we can all do what we do best which is share our experiences and opinions.

 

[Kim_Burly]

That is the exact boat I am in. I am a complete sub to Sir, my husband. But he let's me Domme Lynn, 24/7. Of course, he is free to use her as he pleases, but he is very kind about giving me near total control of her. I love hurting women, I love watching them be hurt by a man or a woman. We also play with another couple and although they didn't want to get into S&M, she thrives on humiliation, and she is becoming something of a pain slut, ever so slowly. Don't ask why you love it, just enjoy the ride!

 

[Masquerades]

Im usually a sub, but sometimes it's fun to dom.
And sometimes I just think I bottom from the top.

 

[StrangeView]

For many of us, our impulse to dominate or submit depends on the situation, and the people we are with.

Have to agree with this. Don't get up tight about it, just relax and enjoy

SV

 

[Kim_Burly]

I think that domming Lynn has made me a better sub to Sir. I realize better now that it's not all about me, I no longer feel the need to understand why he does certain things. I now know it's just because he wants to. He doesn't owe me an explanation. It has increased my contentment.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Im usually a sub, but sometimes it's fun to dom.
And sometimes I just think I bottom from the top.

This is true more often than most Doms want to know about.