Study: Men, women more psychologically different than thought

[JackLuis]

Mars vs Venus?

Found this and thought it would be interesting, but it is a gloss over and doesn't state what the differences are.

I checking the link in the article I found the paper and it still doesn't speak to the differences. As I an writing a story that could use the M-F differences to good effect I was disappointing, but following the bread crumbs, I found a trail to more research. Thought you'd like to know.

http://www.plosone.org/home.action, has more research.

I was looking for the answer to "What do Women Want?" and still haven't found it, but I'm still looking.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Women want status, security, pleasure, a sense of satisfaction, a feeling of self-worth.

What do men want?

 

[JackLuis]

Women want status, security, pleasure, a sense of satisfaction, a feeling of self-worth.

What do men want?

I'm tempted to write Pussy! But that would be crude.

I think that your analysis is so general to be unusable for differentiating the sexes. A more refined criteria is required.

My research has drifted in the Myres-Briggs Type Indicator, the Big Five and the 16 Personality Factors. Though my background is more in the hard sciences, I begin to see the problem with defining the difference between sexes. In reading the cultural differences may be more important globally, however that doesn't nail down the sexual differences.

"More research is needed," he said as he applied for a grant to spend full time on the issue.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Women want status, security, pleasure, a sense of satisfaction, a feeling of self-worth.

What do men want?

To be warm and well fed with lots of sex. We really are a very simple, somewhat primitive species . . .

 

[3113]

I was looking for the answer to "What do Women Want?" and still haven't found it, but I'm still looking.

Liar! You're not looking for the answer to "What do Women Want?" you're looking for the answer to "What Women Want Me?"

 

[Safe_Bet]

Liar! You're not looking for the answer to "What do Women Want?" you're looking for the answer to "What Women Want Me?"

And he's STILL looking!

 

[Handley_Page]

I wonder how much of an influence "nurture" had in the respondents ?.
Would the way you were brought up, the values taught be parents/guardians not influence the answers ?.
If so, then either they asked the wrong questions; or, they'll need a new set of papers.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I'm tempted to write Pussy! But that would be crude.

I think that your analysis is so general to be unusable for differentiating the sexes. A more refined criteria is required.

My research has drifted in the Myres-Briggs Type Indicator, the Big Five and the 16 Personality Factors. Though my background is more in the hard sciences, I begin to see the problem with defining the difference between sexes. In reading the cultural differences may be more important globally, however that doesn't nail down the sexual differences.

"More research is needed," he said as he applied for a grant to spend full time on the issue.

Maybe then, you need to refine your questions. If both men and women want status, for instance, is there a difference in how they generally define status, and is there a difference in the ways that men and women pursue status?

I would assume that the particulars of status are different from culture to culture, are there any common denominators? Any markers that show modus in common across the sexes or that change radically from one sex to the other?

And what do the outliers tell us? Because any group can vary more widely within itself than the variances between groups.

 

[JackLuis]

Liar! You're not looking for the answer to "What do Women Want?" you're looking for the answer to "What Women Want Me?"

Actually I know the answer to that, damned few.

I was hoping to find a clue to the differences in attitude. thought process and values between the sexes. I thought if I could find a study that describes the differences I could make the story more realistic, but alas haven't found it yet.

I'm trying to write a story about a man and two women and how he has to choose which one he wants. The women are very different, but are both mid-30's and have reached the point where they have to make a breeding choice soon. Lester has to make up his mind both have good points and his choice won't be easy.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Maybe then, you need to refine your questions. If both men and women want status, for instance, is there a difference in how they generally define status, and is there a difference in the ways that men and women pursue status?

I would assume that the particulars of status are different from culture to culture, are there any common denominators? Any markers that show modus in common across the sexes or that change radically from one sex to the other?

And what do the outliers tell us? Because any group can vary more widely within itself than the variances between groups.

That's certainly true. Among the Hill Dyak in Indonesia, a man's status is determined by how many heads he's taken and a woman's by how many lovers she's acquired.

 

[Stella_Omega]

You can make one woman not care so much about having kids, and one woman care a little more. Let one of them come from a deeply religious family, one secular. Give one of them a super high I.Q and let the other one be more normally smart.

Make one of them just going back to school, the other obsessed about her business. One of them could be from France. Or India. Or Mexico City, and the other comes from Texas. Or new York. Or Boston.

Let one of them decide she's tired of waiting for him to make up his mind, and she takes off with another guy.

Any of these could be legitimate psychological elements in a woman's mind. Or a man's for that matter.

 

[JackLuis]

You can make one woman not care so much about having kids, and one woman care a little more. Let one of them come from a deeply religious family, one secular. Give one of them a super high I.Q and let the other one be more normally smart.

Make one of them just going back to school, the other obsessed about her business. One of them could be from France. Or India. Or Mexico City, and the other comes from Texas. Or new York. Or Boston.

Let one of them decide she's tired of waiting for him to make up his mind, and she takes off with another guy.

Any of these could be legitimate psychological elements in a woman's mind. Or a man's for that matter.

If I did that it would be a cop out and I want Maureen and Lois to be real breathing characters. Differentiating them will be the key to the problem, but I wanted to use their back stories to show their differences and of course their actions in the story will make them different.

Well I had better get on Lois' introduction or Lester won't have his problem.

 

[ishtat]

That's certainly true. Among the Hill Dyak in Indonesia, a man's status is determined by how many heads he's taken and a woman's by how many lovers she's acquired.

So, can one extrapolate from that and assume that his wife will be given all the head she could ever desire?

Incidentally as a serviceman VM you may be aware that during WWII an Australian/American group of advisors in Borneo trained 1000 Dyaks in guerrilla warfare to fight the Japanese and provide intelligence. I met one of the trainers a few years ago and asked him whether the Japanese were intimidated by such unsophisticated warriors. He replied, "I dunno but the little buggers terrified us."

Apparently they returned with heads or other body parts to prove their success, and collected more than 1500.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Yeah, the missionaries had spent the previous several decades stamping out the headhunting tradition, much to the disgruntlement of the Dyak. When WWII broke out and they were encouraged to take it up again, they were overjoyed. To this day there are heads hanging in the Dyak long houses with Fu Manchu mustaches and eyeglasses that are taken off and gently cleaned every day. Scary? I guess!

 

[beatrice_dreams]

I was looking for the answer to "What do Women Want?" and still haven't found it, but I'm still looking.

I find it rather ironic to find this question on this particular site. And not just because it contains an encyclopedic collection of women's most personal sexual fantasies!

Once you realise that (heterosexual) women fall into two main types, it gets a bit easier from there. Ask most people who post in the BDSM section and they'll be able to explain a little of it to you, as they have inadvertently hit on a truth that goes far deeper than kinky sex.

One type of woman wants a man who gives her the freedom to pursue her passions, does what she asks of him, respects her vision and is protective, manly, romantic and supportive.

The other type of woman wants a man who is inherently decisive, creates a stable and secure environment for her in which she can be a nurturing influence, and is protective and proactive.

Of course, I am assuming here that your question is actually, "What do women want in a man?" If not, the answer is usually:

a) Chocolate
b) Shoes
c) Chocolate

 

[xssve]

Women want status, security, pleasure, a sense of satisfaction, a feeling of self-worth.

What do men want?

Pussy.

 

[PoppingTom]

Women want status, security, pleasure, a sense of satisfaction, a feeling of self-worth.

What do men want?

Women tend to say "All men are the same. I'll take the best."

Men tend to say "Every woman is different. I'll take all."

 

[TxRad]

Women tend to say "All men are the same. I'll take the best."

Men tend to say "Every woman is different. I'll take all."

A smart man says, "I'll try all that will let me but I'll stay single."

 

[R. Richard]

Pussy.

I'm shocked by the overly simplistic thinking shown by your reply. Any such analysis must necessarily include the mention of tits.

 

[TxRad]

I'm shocked by the overly simplistic thinking shown by your reply. Any such analysis must necessarily include the mention of tits.

And ass! Us ass men need to be represented.

 

[Loring2]

Women want status, security, pleasure, a sense of satisfaction, a feeling of self-worth.

What do men want?

Roughly the same thing Stella but in Spades so to speak, women's being in Hearts and don't forget for even a silly minute that women do the child bearing.
I think the difference comes when we begin to define the words; Status, security, and pleasure. The phrases, a sense of satisfaction and a feeling of self worth are probably very similar in both sexes.
Now I want all of you to know that I'm an expert on this with 3 marriages and a long term lover.

Wadda ya mean ... that doesn't qualify me?

Oh... ok then ... I'll listen

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Actually I know the answer to that, damned few.

I was hoping to find a clue to the differences in attitude. thought process and values between the sexes. I thought if I could find a study that describes the differences I could make the story more realistic, but alas haven't found it yet.

I'm trying to write a story about a man and two women and how he has to choose which one he wants. The women are very different, but are both mid-30's and have reached the point where they have to make a breeding choice soon. Lester has to make up his mind both have good points and his choice won't be easy.

I'm not surprised that men and women show significant psychological differences. We have different anatomies and physiologies, different hormonal balances, different biological functions and different social and reproductive strategies, so why would we expect identical psychologies?

But I am surprised that you turn to statistics to try and get a handle on your female characters. I mean, if you were writing about women from strange and unfamiliar cultures, I could see researching their cultural values and attitudes. But all of us walk around with our own ideas and prejudices on what the sexes want and how they behave, and it just seems pretty late in the day to start trying to research "what women want". Or men either.

In any case, statistics are pretty useless in trying to understand an individual. Just because more women like apples than oranges doesn't mean your character will. In fact, a pretty good definition of "character" is "the ways in which an individual deviates from the norm."

 

[TxRad]

It's all Doc's fault. He got me to thinking and that is always a dangerous thing.

Men are more visual and women more emotional or into emotions more.

Men have an outie and women have an innie. One has something to see and then other not as much. Men have something to grab onto both literally and figuratively.

I remember years ago, a woman of forty who had never really seen her sex. I had talked her into filming our lovemaking one afternoon. Later that night, we watched a replay. Well, I watched. She had her face hidden in my shoulder a lot of the time. After it was over she admitted that she had never seen her sex from that angle and so in-depth, no pun intended. She had always thought it ugly until then.

I doubt if I am saying anything new or something that most people don't already know, but I thought it was interesting and bears some resemblance to the topic at hand, uh, so to speak.

 

[JackLuis]

- But all of us walk around with our own ideas and prejudices on what the sexes want and how they behave, and it just seems pretty late in the day to start trying to research "what women want". Or men either.

In any case, statistics are pretty useless in trying to understand an individual. Just because more women like apples than oranges doesn't mean your character will. In fact, a pretty good definition of "character" is "the ways in which an individual deviates from the norm."

That is the beauty of peer reviewed research, it levels the fields to facts. I could write what I think women want, but it might not be true and then Stella or 3 would yell at me and I would feel a fool.

How do you decide if a trait is a gender norm or not if you have no idea what gender normal is?

"Women are all the same, all different! Josh thought as he..." From Spreading Seeds

 

[Stella_Omega]

Dude, if I wrote "what women want," other women would yell at me and call me a fool.

Likewise, 3113.

Likewise, any woman. Even famous ones.

The best any of us can do is write what one woman wants. There will be women who want the same, and women who don't.

There is no "gender norm."