Stuck, would like some help

[KingNeptune]

Hi, all,

I'm not sure how to start this, being new to forums. However, of all the Literotica forum topics, this seemed like the best match. I'll give you a little background first, then get to my story idea.
I've written quite a number of stories, although only one has been "published" on the Web. It was not on Literotica; ask me privately and I'll tell you where. I got paid for it, too! Anyway, many friends tell me I write quite well, and of course, it helps that I like writing.

Here's my problem. I've got two stories, unrelated to each other, both of which seem to have run into a brick wall. The one I'll mention here (the other can be worked on later) has a sort of "Robin Hood" theme to it, that is, rob from the rich, give to the poor, but I cannot seem to work out where the loot should go, or why, or how. Essentially, two women in the medical profession are sick and tired and fed up with all the healthcare insurance issues, and wonder who it is who really profits from it. After experiencing the death of one of their patients who is undergoing what they think to be needless surgery, they begin to wonder about the ethics of the whole medical field. For some reason (there's problem #1 I need to solve), they decide to embark on a “moonlight” career of robbery. My basic idea was the pair of them figured some anonymous insurance company would have to pay out for the loss they caused. So, question #2 is, what do they do with their ill-gotten gains? I think they're both good-hearted people, but I'm stuck as to how they might “give to the poor.”

And yes, there will be some good sex scenes (prob. not between my two women, though) in the story, or else I wouldn't be here on Literotica!

I'd be willing to send what I have so far if any of you think that would help, but it wouldn't work to post the whole thing here.

Looking forward to some thoughts, ideas, etc.,

 

[Seduc1ove]

Well, I don't know who did the unnecessary surgery. I assume some nefarious doctor did it to scam more money out of the insurance company who also looked the other way so they can increase rates on clients. What if they rob from the doctor who did the surgery and/or his cohort at the insurance company and give to the poor family of the victim they scammed?

 

[KingNeptune]

Well, thanks for that; I appreciate the feedback.
I hadn't thought much at all about the "nefarious doctor" idea; I had him in mind as someone who genuinely cares what's going on, but feels sort of "trapped" by the system. Of course, he could have refused to do the surgery, so maybe there *is* something there.
It's the insurance company and the healthcare industry that I'm after. You see, "someone" in the business decided this 93 year old man was a candidate for a heart procedure, but he winds up dead on the table. The two women are terribly upset and distraught, and feel like the whole system has gone bad. So... eventually they turn to this "Robin Hood" idea.
I like your thought about giving back to the man's family, though. They're going to keep on with this for a while, so I don't think it would always be the victim's family who becomes the beneficiary. I think it would leave too close a trace, possibly implicating the women too early.
Again, thanks for the feedback, and so soon, too! I'm actually trying to work through the story right now.
Best,

 

[Deadwood]

I got an idea based on real life...

I have a chiropractor that prescribes massage therapy to her clients. This all above board and truly deep tissue massage with absolutely no hanky-panky, but at one point the health insurance carriers sent a team of fraud investigators onto her for doing this. She ultimately proved that she was above board, but you could turn this into a story line possibly.

What if the two nurses did massage therapy for their clients, not only stealing insurance claims from the insurance companies in doing so, but giving them the ultimate in massages when the doors were closed.

It's kind of cliche I know, but maybe someone can work it over a bit more???

(By the way...I am a farmer so I have an incredibly bad back so yes my massage therapy sessions are purely therapeutic.)

 

[KingNeptune]

Not a bad idea, but it doesn't fit with where I think the plot is heading. Mind you, there might be room for it, but more as a "side" sort of thing, if that makes sense.
Would it help folks if I posted a couple paragraphs here?

 

[KingNeptune]

Still reading through the story, try to work out what these two are up to.
Would it help if I posted a couple paragraphs here to give an idea of the plot?

 

[Island_Barbarian]

It seems backwards. I think the big problem with the medical system in the U.S. is insurance companies that don't pay.

The ill-gotten gains could then be given to the rightful claimants who were unethical denied coverage. Hey, they could launch a plan to get X amount of dollars to cover some operation and having sex could be a means to accomplish their goals. (i.e. seduce a VP to have him look the other way.)

 

[Seduc1ove]

What if they started with the family of the original victim then decided to move up? Perhaps starting a nonprofit organization with anonymous "donors" that helps out patients and families who have suffered malpractice or they did research and discovered hidden malpractice like the first unnecessary surgery and gave to several other families. Or even to support research to find cures for diseases that pharmaceutical companies make big bucks off of prescription meds for. Also, they could just start an organization/donate the money to something completely not medically related. Like helping the poor(literally), saving the rainforest, or sending humanitarian aid to third world countries.

 

[KingNeptune]

Hmm... you might be getting closer.
I've been working on the story for the past few hours, and it's nearly time to quit and go to bed.
They just knocked off their first robbery, and are feeling horribly, mightily, hugely remorseful. I don't think they knew what they were getting into...
As an aside, I'm vaguely trying to think of where some good hot sex might come into the plot, but I think it might be a ways off yet.
Would a few paragraphs be helpful, maybe in a PM?

 

[KingNeptune]

One more thought: I've toyed with the idea of an "anonymous beneficiary" for the victim's family, and for other such ill-treated patients, and malpractice in general, but I'm not sure how well that might work out for the good of all.
After this first robbery, the pair of them are hugely shook up, and it will take them some serious soul-searching to work out what to do with the loot.
Thanks for your thoughts & ideas; please do keep them coming!

 

[snoopercharmbrights]

You have me confused.

If the "nefarious doctor" performs unnecessary surgery and gets paid by the insurance company, where does a "poor" family come in to this? They are at least wealthy enough to have health insurance. If my 93-y-o grandfather died on the operating table, I would not be particularly surprised, nor would I think that money could compensate for that, nor would it leave me poorer.

A more meaningful scenario is if an operation on a (relatively) healthy 45-y-o went wrong and left him unable to work, and malpractice could not be proved so the family went from reasonable affluence to sudden poverty with a basket case to support. Then the "Robin Hood" couple step in.

Distributing their stolen money is going to be difficult in these days as banks are on the lookout for money-laundering. One of my sons sold a car for cash and the bank wanted to know where he got $20k in used notes.

 

[KingNeptune]

Thanks for the feedback; you've given me something to think about on a couple of fronts.
First, there's the doctor issue: I don't have in mind that he's good or bad - probably good - but I suspect he feels "trapped" by the health-care system. I had in mind the grandmother of a friend, who at 96, went through a complete hip-replacement procedure, for apparently no good reason. She died at 98, and it wasn't that apparent that she had any improvement in quality of life. However, your points are well-taken, and may actually make more sense. I'm still thinking of the doctor as pretty much innocent, but trapped. At any rate, he's a fairly minor character, at least so far.
As to the money: yeah, that's going to be tough. My two women have just done their first robbery, and are now wondering about that very topic.
Again, thanks for the insight & ideas on the insurance, malpractice, etc.