Stress

[fenghuang]

We wake up this morning and my partner starts foreplay. GREAT!
Two minutes late we're getting nowhere and she says she's too stressed. @#$%^&*!!!!!
Which stresses me to the point where I'm too stressed to even want to take myself into the bathroom for a wank.

To be fair, there are some very good reasons for both of us be stressed at the moment - death of my father and having builders in, just to mention two of the smaller ones! And it doesn't help that I'm in the middle of one of those months when sex twice a day wouldn't be enough, let alone our usual once a week - and no I've not been preasuring her.

Sex stops me getting stressed. If I'm stressed I don't want sex (well not with anyone else anyway.) If she's stressed she can't get turned on.

Not sure this is really a How To, possibly an Isolated Blurt, but if anyone has any suggestions I'm open to ideas right now.

 

[RagsNRiches]

Not a lot of detail to work with here, but for myself, licking pussy nice and slow at first almost always calms me down. She may have initiated the foreplay to get you to give her foreplay.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. This can mean: if I want fellatio, then it behooves me to begin by giving cunninlingus.

Nothing works all the time, but first giving what you want in return will often provide your wish.

 

[Colton_White]

Time is the best healer,

once your other troubles are taken care of.. sex will come back automatically

I wish you good luck.

 

[fenghuang]

Not a lot of detail to work with here, but for myself, licking pussy nice and slow at first almost always calms me down. She may have initiated the foreplay to get you to give her foreplay.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. This can mean: if I want fellatio, then it behooves me to begin by giving cunninlingus.

Nothing works all the time, but first giving what you want in return will often provide your wish.

Rarely alowed to get my head anywhere near her crotch and it was only after a few minutes of forplay from me that usually works fine that she said she was stressed.

Time is the best healer,

once your other troubles are taken care of.. sex will come back automatically

I wish you good luck.

Not sure about "automatically", but fingers crossed ...

 

[RozieMozie]

im srry to hear tht stress is effecting ur sexual life

i find tht a good fuck is all i need to get away from the stress ... its like a release, and the relaxed feeling u get after sex can feel really good when u've been all up tight with stress ... also know tht even though u r having sex, tht does not mean tht u r pushing away what it is tht is stressing u out ... its simply a way to relax, and dealing with what it is thts stressing u out when u r relaxed it much easier then when u r up tight

u know ur wife best, and ur relationship with her best ... and i agree tht u should not pressure her ... but tactfully and respectfully in the way u know her best talk to her about stress sex ... see what she thinks about it, and work from there ... sometimes words can be very refreshing, and often less misunderstandings come from a good conversation

best of luck!

 

[Carnevil9]

Maybe you need a "date." Pick a time, in the next few days, when the two of you can set aside several hours for romance, chat, soft music, caressing, a glass of wine, a dish of tasty viands, and sex if it leads to that. With no pressure, and no urgency. It might work. Good luck!......Carney

 

[mynameiskate]

Well, I'm very sorry to hear about your troubles, but have you tried working out, or meditation? Working out is a pretty good way to clear your mind.

 

[IrisAlthea]

Try to find ways to deal with the stress. If the reasons for being stressed are temporary, you could try exercise, massages or perhaps try to do something you both like one evening.
If the reasons for being stressed can be dealt with, that is even better, of course.

 

[Bellajack]

I agree with Carney....a good convo....movie....cuddling ....some wine...a relaxing evening....then maybe the stress will melt away........

BellaJack

 

[Hadar]

see i would not know how to help with this personaly im a low stress guy ... always have been always will be ... i dont like to sweat stuff ... and no its not because "your so young blagh blagh blagh" yes i may only be 19 but i have worked in some of the most stressful enviroments without getting stressed ... its like im always high cept im not -.- ... but you know a good way to let things out is to write them down ... i do in forms of poetry ... again thats just me and im well crazy

 

[RagsNRiches]

One of the best stress beaters...

is hypnosis.

Now don't go negeative on me about this. There's useful hypnosis and useless hypnosis. The entertainment variety is worse than useless, because it gives a distorted idea of the whole subject. Also, AMA is dead-set against anyhting that can possibly cost them money, and hypnosis is quite inexpensive. I have no affiliation with any hypnosis businesses.

I'll try to put some urls for you into this message, but if I fail now, check back later, because I'll get some on here soon.

Just so you know, I smoked for 47 years, and I quit rather easily with hypnosis. I slipped a couple of times after the initial session, but within one week of the first session, I had completely quit, and that was on July 9, 2004.

Since then, I have used the gift of hypnosis for all sorts of problems. Now. after several years of use, I am able to write my own hypnosis programs to achieve my goals. It is a fantastic resource, and it becomes less and less expensive the more I learn.

 

[RagsNRiches]

One of the best stress beaters...

is hypnosis.

Now don't go negative on me about this. There's useful hypnosis and useless hypnosis. The entertainment variety is worse than useless, because it gives a distorted idea of the whole subject. Also, the AMA is dead-set against anything that can possibly cost them money, and hypnosis is quite inexpensive, so they have a history of sabotaging hypnosis, although they have come around somewhat in recent years.

I have no affiliation with any hypnosis businesses.

I'll try to put some urls for you into this message, but if I fail now, check back later, because I'll get some on here soon.

Just so you know, I smoked for 47 years, and I quit rather easily with hypnosis. I slipped a couple of times after the initial session, but within one week of the first session, I had completely quit, and that was on July 9, 2004.

Since then, I have used the gift of hypnosis for all sorts of problems. Now. after several years of use, I am able to write my own hypnosis programs to achieve my goals. It is a fantastic resource, and it becomes less and less expensive the more I learn.

Here are some resources:

http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/

http://www.hypnosis-tapes.org/

http://www.hypnosispower.com/index.php

Hypnosis is a journey into your own mind. Therefore, it is the perfect tool to ease your mind.
And it will do so to your best advantage, because self-protection is its main function.

Fenghuang, this is a doorway that can lead you to peace amidst the turmoil of daily life. It can heal you, your mate, and your relationship.

I wish you well.

Rags

 

[rosco rathbone]

BTDT...that's why I don't do equal relationships any more.

Lie there and do your @#$% wifely duties. I'll make it quick.


Best of luck with the stress.

 

[RagsNRiches]

Lots of helpful

suggestions, plans, and ideas have come up for Fenghuang, and it is heartening to see the empathy that exists in this venue.

It's just one more reason I'm happy with my descision to join Literotica.