Story criticism

[williepeter]

I notice when my story picks up favorites suddenly the Anonymous user starts 5 -6 at a time and is sometimes very vicious. I do enjoy the ones from published authors some encouraging me to keep on some pleading for me to quit.

https://www.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=5942888&page=submissions

 

[HectorBidon]

According to your Member Page, you joined Lit 8 months ago and have posted 49 stories since then. That is quite an accomplishment.

I read two of your stories (they seem to be mostly fairly short). One was in Matiure about a woman who is dissatisfied with the attention her husband pays her and goes to a therapist who gets her to engage in all kinds of new sexual acts. It got one comment and a not-too-bad score. The other was in Loving Wives, about a husband who is dissatisfied that his wife won't perform oral sex, and so she enrolls in "slut school" and learns to engage in all kinds of sexual acts with a variety of strange men. it got a ton of comments, mostly negative, and a pretty low score, even by LW standards.

Based on those two samples, it seems like you are setting out specifically to write "porn" stories: stories in which there is a certain naughty flouting of conventional norms, a certain gratuitous display of frowned upon sexual acts.

There is an audience for that kind of story I suppose, and there are no doubt guidelines for writing them effectively. But I found the characters and situations in your stories completely unrealistic, and so just not very interesting.

Let me suggest, as an exercise, that you try to expand your repertoire by writing stories that are more "erotic" in nature.

You might try a "stroker:" a depiction of a single Erotic Coupling between two people that tries to bring about in the reader, through setting, mood, action, and dialog, the sense of excitement and joy that one of the characters feels for the other.

You might try a Romance, in which the focus is not on sex at all but on the way in which two people lovingly fit into each other's lives.

People like reading about real people, real situations, real feelings, real emotions. Try to bring more of that into your work, and you may find that your stories resonate better with your readers.

Best of luck.

Hector (another retired engineer and ex-technical writer)

 

[williepeter]

Thank you Hector very constructive.

 

[yukonnights]

I read your new story 'Liberation' to get an idea of your writing.

It's been my experience that more detailed and longer stories are much more appreciated by my followers and readers. I'm basically saying the same things HectorBidon said; Tell a complete story. A story where the characters and the the theme grab the reader's interest. A story long enough to build up the situation and characters in a believable way.

This may not be what you enjoy though. You've already written 49 stories in your short time here, and perhaps that is what you enjoy writing. If it is, then over time you'll probably be discovered by an audience who likes these shorter stories.

One grand mistake you made in this story is your depiction of Feminist ideas and goals. This made the whole premise unrealistic/unbelievable.

What Feminism Is and What it Isn't; There is a common misconception that feminists are reverse sexists, however, unlike male sexists who oppress women, feminists do not seek to oppress men. Rather, they seek equal compensation, opportunities, and treatment across genders.

In the end, you're not getting paid to write and it's just for your enjoyment. To that end, you can write whatever you find enjoyable. However, it seems we all like the 'pat-on-the-back'. You posted here for some input on how to get those pats.

Try a longer story and see if you enjoy it. Hope some of this helps.

 

[JeffersonMerrick]

Stop allowing Anonymous reviews and ratings.

I had a comment on a story I posted recently from the same (I am 99% certain) person who has commented on ALL my works so far, all rude and derogatory. This anonymous poster gave me ONE star because I did not include the Word Chapter in my chapters, simply numbers. I have to marvel at the level of intellect of someone who trawls through posts and finds the need to criticize for the most trivial reason one can imagine. I really don't mind if people post and comment and leave one or two star reviews provided they have a reason, but no chapters? Come on! Get a life! I would suggest that Anonymous responses, ratings and reviews should not be allowed.

 

[ElectricBlue]

I would suggest that Anonymous responses, ratings and reviews should not be allowed.

You can turn anons off on your own stories, but I for one would never support a site ban on anons.

Half my comments are from anon, and they're almost without exception worthwhile and intelligent. Those that aren't - a tiny tiny minority, I just delete. I occasionally get moronic comments from named Account holders, I delete those too.

 

[LongDraw]

I totally get what the OP is talking about, even though the constructive criticism above is 100% legitimate. A few responders here stated that submitting longer stories that are more substantive rather than pure action and they are absolutely right that you draw your audience based on your writing style.

However, there are exceptions and you can refer to my story http://literotica.com/s/vy

This is a 28,000 word story (an updated and significantly edited version is being pushed once approved) which goes into significant detail. Yet I found the hills were alive with the sound of internet troll music, their shrill and often incoherent derogatory Anonymous comments kept filling. Ha ha ha ha!

Seriously though, there will always be haters. It's not fair and it's not kind, but stick with it and make a good effort and others will see past the garbage to find your jewelry. Just keep that treasure chest locked Tight!; cause rich people be getting robbed these days.