Spanking for maximum pleasure

[DrHappy]

My wife and I have enjoyed occasional spanking for several years. I was wondering if some of you more experienced people might have some feedback about the following two topics

Topic 1:
2 Levels of pain that produce positive results:

Level 1: Medium intensity for instant gratification
Level 2: High intensity pain, with a wave of lingering pleasure that comes afterwards.​

I’ve always noticed that there seems to be a sweet spot in intensity, which I’m now referring to as Level 1. For me, it’s where there’s a lingering sting after each impact, but it’s still reasonably easy to endure. There seems to be an instant burst of pleasure from this. It still intense pain, but it’s fairly easy to want another one, especially after some touching. If it’s too intense, it feels unpleasant, and the pain seems to overwhelm the burst of pleasure. In the past, we would try avoid any spanking that went beyond this sweet spot.

However, after recently pushing myself to endure several highly intense impacts, I noticed a rush that seemed to occur afterwards. It’s been really cool. I felt great afterwards that night, and it seems to have lingered for several days. These impacts were the ones were intense enough that I didn’t want another one afterwards, and it took considerable effort to not say “Stop!” Those are the ones where I was thinking “I can’t take another one of those,” but I let it happen anyway… repeatedly. It paid off! I noticed some red bumps on me the next day, but no bruising or anything serious. My bike ride the next day was a LITTLE sore, but not bad. I thought that it might have been adrenaline, but it's lingered a long time.

Is this common knowledge? Has anyone else have similar experiences? I hope that I can reproduce it.


Topic 2:
Pacing for maximum endorphin/hormone effect

I’ve come across articles like the following which suggest endorphins are only released in bursts, and maximizing their affects requires a specific sequence of stimulation.

http://isthisbdsm.blogspot.com/2013/09/the-science-behind-spanking.html
http://friskybusinessboutique.com/the-endorphin-levels-in-bdsm/

The endorphin loads release in their entirety, and it takes the body about ten minutes to generate another one. After the body releases a load into the system, it needs at least ten minutes of some sort of stimulation before it will be ready to release another one.
​

This sounds plausible, but I haven’t really seen this described elsewhere. Most other Spanking FAQs that I’ve found elsewhere simply suggest a warm up with lower intensity, and then building up, with randomness thrown in. What do others here do? Are those articles just someone’s folklore?

And then there are porn videos, which typically just show some poor girl bent over while someone beats the crap out of her bare bottom with little or no warmup. Does anyone really do this for fun? Or is this just a typical symptom of porn directors wanting to show something extreme to differentiate themselves from other directors?

 

[IrisAlthea]

Considering the two links:
I do think there is soething to the information, like the lag period it takes for the body to produce more endorphines and how the nerves are stimulated.

I'm not that fond of this kind of recipy-like essay though, because people are not machines and they react very differently to the same thing.
Endorphins are morphine-like and go ahead and ask a group of people who've had morphine for medical reasons how they feel about it and react to it.
You'll probably get very varying answers.
Ask a group of people who bottom how they react to pain, the state sometimes called subspace, after care etc and you will get just as varying answers.

 

[DrHappy]

IrisAlthea,

Thank you for your input.

I'm not that fond of this kind of recipy-like essay though, because people are not machines and they react very differently to the same thing.

That’s what I was thinking. For other topics, like floggers-vs-crops-vs-canes, I found several sources for of information that was very similar. For the that specific stair-step recipe (in the links in the original post), I couldn’t find any other sources for that. Both articles had many identical sentences, so either there is some mild plagiarism going on, or it’s the same author.

 

[Collar_N_Cuffs]

I don't like pain, but I love spanking.
What I mean by that is, spanking is all about the power exchange for me. That moment when you know you are going to spank or be spanked, but not exactly when, the waiting, so delicious to me. So maybe part of your pleasure is from the mental state of taking whacks you thought you couldn't take? The mental state is what it is all about for me. That can last a long time

 

[switchersm]

My wife and I have enjoyed occasional spanking for several years. I was wondering if some of you more experienced people might have some feedback about the following two topics

Topic 1:
2 Levels of pain that produce positive results:

Level 1: Medium intensity for instant gratification
Level 2: High intensity pain, with a wave of lingering pleasure that comes afterwards.​

I’ve always noticed that there seems to be a sweet spot in intensity, which I’m now referring to as Level 1. For me, it’s where there’s a lingering sting after each impact, but it’s still reasonably easy to endure. There seems to be an instant burst of pleasure from this. It still intense pain, but it’s fairly easy to want another one, especially after some touching. If it’s too intense, it feels unpleasant, and the pain seems to overwhelm the burst of pleasure. In the past, we would try avoid any spanking that went beyond this sweet spot.

However, after recently pushing myself to endure several highly intense impacts, I noticed a rush that seemed to occur afterwards. It’s been really cool. I felt great afterwards that night, and it seems to have lingered for several days. These impacts were the ones were intense enough that I didn’t want another one afterwards, and it took considerable effort to not say “Stop!” Those are the ones where I was thinking “I can’t take another one of those,” but I let it happen anyway… repeatedly. It paid off! I noticed some red bumps on me the next day, but no bruising or anything serious. My bike ride the next day was a LITTLE sore, but not bad. I thought that it might have been adrenaline, but it's lingered a long time.

Is this common knowledge? Has anyone else have similar experiences? I hope that I can reproduce it.


Topic 2:
Pacing for maximum endorphin/hormone effect

I’ve come across articles like the following which suggest endorphins are only released in bursts, and maximizing their affects requires a specific sequence of stimulation.

http://isthisbdsm.blogspot.com/2013/09/the-science-behind-spanking.html
http://friskybusinessboutique.com/the-endorphin-levels-in-bdsm/

The endorphin loads release in their entirety, and it takes the body about ten minutes to generate another one. After the body releases a load into the system, it needs at least ten minutes of some sort of stimulation before it will be ready to release another one.
​

This sounds plausible, but I haven’t really seen this described elsewhere. Most other Spanking FAQs that I’ve found elsewhere simply suggest a warm up with lower intensity, and then building up, with randomness thrown in. What do others here do? Are those articles just someone’s folklore?

And then there are porn videos, which typically just show some poor girl bent over while someone beats the crap out of her bare bottom with little or no warmup. Does anyone really do this for fun? Or is this just a typical symptom of porn directors wanting to show something extreme to differentiate themselves from other directors?

My beloved wife spanks my ass every sunday. She uses a riding crop, a cane and a thick wooden stick and gives me between a 100 and 150 on each buttock. there is no warming up. she starts mostly with the woodden stick, then cane and then riding crop. 10 with each and starts the round again. she beats powerful and without any mercy and the first 50 are very painful, but then the pain is reduced more and more,what I do not tell her, and I enjoy the spanking. the marks disappear mostly after some hours. or during the next day.

 

[pensivepoet]

I like taking as much as I can, but not because I like pain, as I cheat and take 3 ibuprofen BEFORE the spanking happens if I know it's coming. Yep~I cheat
But I love spanking and who knows why.

 

[DrHappy]

I don't like pain, but I love spanking.
What I mean by that is, spanking is all about the power exchange for me. That moment when you know you are going to spank or be spanked, but not exactly when, the waiting, so delicious to me. So maybe part of your pleasure is from the mental state of taking whacks you thought you couldn't take? The mental state is what it is all about for me. That can last a long time

Interesting. I don’t associate power exchange with the experience at all. However, I’ll give it some more thought. If I had to guess, I’d say the basis for my pleasure is more chemical than psychological, though the line between the two phenomena can be blurry.

For me, the mental state going into it was that I’ve been under prolonged stressed about work issues for weeks… lots of long hours.. things not going well… feeling burned out. I considered making a posting here about treating mild depression with spanking, and its positive effects on mood. I feel like a got a wonderful chemical boost to my brain. It’s drug free, and has few calories than alcohol... and it’s free... except now I'm thinking about ordering a new spanking implement.

 

[DrHappy]

My beloved wife spanks my ass every sunday. She uses a riding crop, a cane and a thick wooden stick and gives me between a 100 and 150 on each buttock. there is no warming up. she starts mostly with the woodden stick, then cane and then riding crop. 10 with each and starts the round again. she beats powerful and without any mercy and the first 50 are very painful, but then the pain is reduced more and more,what I do not tell her, and I enjoy the spanking. the marks disappear mostly after some hours. or during the next day.

That sounds similar to some of the videos I’ve seen… no warm up. And pretty severe. Maybe I’ll look into warmup vs no warmup.

You say that your marks disappear mostly after some hours, or during the next day. Some of the videos I’ve seen look like they could take a week or two to heal, especially the ones with a cane. Maybe they aren’t as bad as they look.

 

[DrHappy]

I like taking as much as I can, but not because I like pain, as I cheat and take 3 ibuprofen BEFORE the spanking happens if I know it's coming. Yep~I cheat
But I love spanking and who knows why.

I’d be concerned that I’d be more likely to endure damage and not know, if I took any type of pain reliever beforehand. I might be more willing to ask her to go harder. I’d also be concerned that maybe it might blunt the chemical or psychological effects. However, for you, maybe it’s more of a power exchange, like it is for Collar N Cuffs. In that case, I could see that it might possibly enhance the desired effect.

 

[Collar_N_Cuffs]

Interesting. I don’t associate power exchange with the experience at all. However, I’ll give it some more thought. If I had to guess, I’d say the basis for my pleasure is more chemical than psychological, though the line between the two phenomena can be blurry.

For me, the mental state going into it was that I’ve been under prolonged stressed about work issues for weeks… lots of long hours.. things not going well… feeling burned out. I considered making a posting here about treating mild depression with spanking, and its positive effects on mood. I feel like a got a wonderful chemical boost to my brain. It’s drug free, and has few calories than alcohol... and it’s free... except now I'm thinking about ordering a new spanking implement.

If I am being spanked, I am vulnerable because I want to be vulnerable. That's power exchange in my book! Likewise, if I have someone under my power, I'm going to spank them So even if the blows are feather soft, it's the situation that does it for me. Honestly spank me too hard and I will not want to comply. I really, really don't care for pain. That's why I suggested there might be more to your pleasure than the physical sensation alone.

And I'm glad you mentioned the caning marks. I also cannot believe that those marks go away so quickly. Taking switchersm's example and going with only 100 strokes per buttock (a phrase you don't get to use very often ), that's at least 30 strokes, hard (according to him), with a cane, on each side. Really? That goes away in a few hours? I'm... slightly skeptical. I'm sorry!

 

[pensivepoet]

If I am being spanked, I am vulnerable because I want to be vulnerable. That's power exchange in my book! Likewise, if I have someone under my power, I'm going to spank them So even if the blows are feather soft, it's the situation that does it for me. Honestly spank me too hard and I will not want to comply. I really, really don't care for pain. That's why I suggested there might be more to your pleasure than the physical sensation alone.

And I'm glad you mentioned the caning marks. I also cannot believe that those marks go away so quickly. Taking switchersm's example and going with only 100 strokes per buttock (a phrase you don't get to use very often ), that's at least 30 strokes, hard (according to him), with a cane, on each side. Really? That goes away in a few hours? I'm... slightly skeptical. I'm sorry!

Yeah, what she said.

 

[switchersm]

That sounds similar to some of the videos I’ve seen… no warm up. And pretty severe. Maybe I’ll look into warmup vs no warmup.

You say that your marks disappear mostly after some hours, or during the next day. Some of the videos I’ve seen look like they could take a week or two to heal, especially the ones with a cane. Maybe they aren’t as bad as they look.

When she used the cane for the first time, I was astonished that it didn't hurt as much as expected. It is a very light one. marks stay some days if the cane is used on my thighs. the riding crop and the woodden stick cause more pain. my wife beats very hard, but not so that my skin breaks. that happened only a few times, when she always hit the same spot. even if there are remaining blue and green marks, they disappeare after one day. That has always been with my body after bumps in sports f.e. other than my wife's body. If she bumps a furniture corner, the mark is visible more than a week.
Those videos are not disciplining spanking, in my eyes they are only cruel and unhealthy and satisfy sadistic voyeurs. I think they use a sort of numbing.
I love the spanking by my wife because the szene nude in front of her and allowing her to spank my ass is vunelnerable and humiliating and I accept that she has the trousers on in our sexual relationship, in which she also is my keyholder.

 

[N2outdoors]

This is all good advice on how to properly spank, but is there a good site to view this being administered? I'd like to see someone being taken to the different levels described in the links by the OP. I am no sure how to initiate the climax once you start going for the next climax. Also, is the climax described in the articles an orgasm?

 

[thelaughingcat]

Hmmm...having seen spankings at various different events, we really are all completely different as to where that 'sweet spot' is, so I can't see how you could make an umbrella how-to guide.

I'm with CnC, spanking for me is all about the power exchange, definitely not the pain. That whippy little cane comes out and I am knocked straight out my happy zone and straight into Yowchersville, and I seriously don't like Yowchersville.

While I don't go into subspace, spanking does get me damn close - it's like a stess reliever and turn on all at once - winding me up as I wind down I think the only recipe for maximum pleasure is plenty of practice

 

[DrHappy]

The variety of responses have been interesting. Two posters stated that for them, it definitely the power exchange that was the appeal of spanking, and not the pain. For me, I think that it’s more of the physiological chemistry (endorphins, etc…) involved with moderate pain that I find appealing, and not necessarily the power exchange. The feeling of a mutual shared experience as a couple does give it more meaning to us.

For my wife and me, the dynamic between us is more like that of a masseuse. The spanker tries their best to please the other. I spank her sometimes, and other times, she does me. It seems like achieving the right intensity would be very difficult without lots of feedback. “Too hard. Harder. Not too many times in the same spot. Go easy with that device. How about that other device?” That would seem difficult if you are relying on an infrequent use of a safe word to give honest feedback on limits. I don’t want to be ignored if I say “too hard” without using a safe word. I’ve read that some use words like “yellow” and “red”, so maybe that helps.

In some of the videos I’ve seen (disclaimer: yes, I know it’s porn), they will sometimes have a female dom doing the spanking, and there’s a significant element of humiliation for the male spankee. She insults him, berates his penis size, makes him wear lace, etc… That would just piss me off, and is not an experience that I would want any part of. Maybe that’s just a symptom of me not being sub material. My wife and I do a lot of laughing together, regardless of who is being spanked.

... is there a good site to view this being administered? I'd like to see someone being taken to the different levels described in the links by the OP. I am no sure how to initiate the climax once you start going for the next climax.

I haven’t seen any videos that seem to show the stages described in those articles. Most spanking videos tend to be 6-9 minutes. Those articles talk about spending around 10 minutes at each stage.