Some things are beyond forbidden

[angela146]

Hubby and I were playing "Do Tell" (one of those relationship/party games) with a group of close friends over the weekend. Most of the folks present were either married or in long term relationships and we were pushing each other to share intimate stuff (which is a big part of the game).

Someone asked, "Name something your husband has forbidden you to do - infidelity doesn't count." It was an attempt to see just how feminist or un-feminist we all were. Did our husbands "forbid" us to do certain things and did we obey?

While a couple of the other women were answering, I looked over at my hubby. We made eye contact and I raised my eyebrow - telling him I was about to throw gasoline on the fire. The look on his face told me that he already knew what I was going to say, and that I had better tread lightly.

I had a minute or so to contemplate, and then when it was my turn, I went ahead and said it: "I, uh, am absolutely forbidden to get my hair cut short."

A couple of people laughed out loud, recognizing a hot topic in their own relationships, and knowing that, in my case especially, it would be an extreme change. I'm of Italian/Spanish heritage and my dark, waist-length hair is a major part of my "look".

One of our friends decided to light the match and said, "Oh, come on! You would look wonderful with cropped hair! You could donate it to 'Locks for Love'." She was trying to goad Bill into speaking out on the subject, knowing that it had to be a hot button for him.

I then put the question to Bill, "What would you do to me if I ever got it cut off?" I figured he might use the question as an opportunity to hint about our SM side, but the topic hit too much of a raw nerve for him.

He thought for a moment. I could see that he was trying to contain some intense feelings that I would even mention the idea. His response shocked even me.

He took a sip of whatever he was drinking and said, "Until it grew back, I wouldn't say, 'I love you' to you."

There was a deafening silence for a couple of seconds as I felt the verbal sword slice my heart into itty bitty pieces. Then he added the coup-de-grace, "I wouldn't stop loving you. I just wouldn't say the words."

Tears streamed down my face as I thought about two years without hearing my husband say, "I love you". Thoughts of hair extensions, nightly floggings, and banishment to a separate bedroom raced through my mind.

Our friends looked at us, horrified at what they had just seen and heard.

... and then I woke up, screaming in terror.

It was one of the, scariest, most intense, most realistic nightmares I have ever had. It took a good couple of minutes of Bill holding me while I cried and said, "I'm sorry," over and over again, until I finally realized that it was nothing more than a dream.

Guys, if you haven't said, "I love you" to your wife or girlfriend recently, do it now... *right now*. It's that important.

 

[vrosej10]

Hubby and I were playing "Do Tell" (one of those relationship/party games) with a group of close friends over the weekend. Most of the folks present were either married or in long term relationships and we were pushing each other to share intimate stuff (which is a big part of the game).

Someone asked, "Name something your husband has forbidden you to do - infidelity doesn't count." It was an attempt to see just how feminist or un-feminist we all were. Did our husbands "forbid" us to do certain things and did we obey?

While a couple of the other women were answering, I looked over at my hubby. We made eye contact and I raised my eyebrow - telling him I was about to throw gasoline on the fire. The look on his face told me that he already knew what I was going to say, and that I had better tread lightly.

I had a minute or so to contemplate, and then when it was my turn, I went ahead and said it: "I, uh, am absolutely forbidden to get my hair cut short."

A couple of people laughed out loud, recognizing a hot topic in their own relationships, and knowing that, in my case especially, it would be an extreme change. I'm of Italian/Spanish heritage and my dark, waist-length hair is a major part of my "look".

One of our friends decided to light the match and said, "Oh, come on! You would look wonderful with cropped hair! You could donate it to 'Locks for Love'." She was trying to goad Bill into speaking out on the subject, knowing that it had to be a hot button for him.

I then put the question to Bill, "What would you do to me if I ever got it cut off?" I figured he might use the question as an opportunity to hint about our SM side, but the topic hit too much of a raw nerve for him.

He thought for a moment. I could see that he was trying to contain some intense feelings that I would even mention the idea. His response shocked even me.

He took a sip of whatever he was drinking and said, "Until it grew back, I wouldn't say, 'I love you' to you."

There was a deafening silence for a couple of seconds as I felt the verbal sword slice my heart into itty bitty pieces. Then he added the coup-de-grace, "I wouldn't stop loving you. I just wouldn't say the words."

Tears streamed down my face as I thought about two years without hearing my husband say, "I love you". Thoughts of hair extensions, nightly floggings, and banishment to a separate bedroom raced through my mind.

Our friends looked at us, horrified at what they had just seen and heard.

... and then I woke up, screaming in terror.

It was one of the, scariest, most intense, most realistic nightmares I have ever had. It took a good couple of minutes of Bill holding me while I cried and said, "I'm sorry," over and over again, until I finally realized that it was nothing more than a dream.

Guys, if you haven't said, "I love you" to your wife or girlfriend recently, do it now... *right now*. It's that important.

Wow, I am so glad I don't have your husband! Two years ago after struggling for many years to have radical hair in spite of ultra fine, thinning hair, I decided to shave my head and have been doing it every two weeks since then. I couldn't be happier. If I want hair, I wear one of my extensive wig collection. My husband took it in good grace as he did when I started my now massive tattoo collection. This is largely because he knows saying no to me would push me to do it anyway. I'm that kind of person.

 

[engel3]

Hubby and I were playing "Do Tell" (one of those relationship/party games) with a group of close friends over the weekend. Most of the folks present were either married or in long term relationships and we were pushing each other to share intimate stuff (which is a big part of the game).

Someone asked, "Name something your husband has forbidden you to do - infidelity doesn't count." It was an attempt to see just how feminist or un-feminist we all were. Did our husbands "forbid" us to do certain things and did we obey?

While a couple of the other women were answering, I looked over at my hubby. We made eye contact and I raised my eyebrow - telling him I was about to throw gasoline on the fire. The look on his face told me that he already knew what I was going to say, and that I had better tread lightly.

I had a minute or so to contemplate, and then when it was my turn, I went ahead and said it: "I, uh, am absolutely forbidden to get my hair cut short."

A couple of people laughed out loud, recognizing a hot topic in their own relationships, and knowing that, in my case especially, it would be an extreme change. I'm of Italian/Spanish heritage and my dark, waist-length hair is a major part of my "look".

One of our friends decided to light the match and said, "Oh, come on! You would look wonderful with cropped hair! You could donate it to 'Locks for Love'." She was trying to goad Bill into speaking out on the subject, knowing that it had to be a hot button for him.

I then put the question to Bill, "What would you do to me if I ever got it cut off?" I figured he might use the question as an opportunity to hint about our SM side, but the topic hit too much of a raw nerve for him.

He thought for a moment. I could see that he was trying to contain some intense feelings that I would even mention the idea. His response shocked even me.

He took a sip of whatever he was drinking and said, "Until it grew back, I wouldn't say, 'I love you' to you."

There was a deafening silence for a couple of seconds as I felt the verbal sword slice my heart into itty bitty pieces. Then he added the coup-de-grace, "I wouldn't stop loving you. I just wouldn't say the words."

Tears streamed down my face as I thought about two years without hearing my husband say, "I love you". Thoughts of hair extensions, nightly floggings, and banishment to a separate bedroom raced through my mind.

Our friends looked at us, horrified at what they had just seen and heard.

... and then I woke up, screaming in terror.

It was one of the, scariest, most intense, most realistic nightmares I have ever had. It took a good couple of minutes of Bill holding me while I cried and said, "I'm sorry," over and over again, until I finally realized that it was nothing more than a dream.

Guys, if you haven't said, "I love you" to your wife or girlfriend recently, do it now... *right now*. It's that important.

Ouch, good thing it was just a dream, but still. That had to hurt a lot even after you woke up.

I say I love you to my girlfriend every single day without fail, and at least twice, once when we wake up and once before we drift off to sleep

 

[vrosej10]

Damn I missed that last line. Don't I look like an idiot!

 

[JamesSD]

Interesting dream. Mine are rarely so concrete, and typically are non-sense.

I'm a long-hair lover on women myself. I'm a feminist who believes in equal pay, freedom of choice, and feel like a woman can dress and act any way she pleases. However, I personally would have a hard time dating a woman with hair above her shoulders or who chose not to shave her legs and armpits. Part of it is to me, the short haired look is just hard for most women to pull off. The "pixie" cut really only works on a small percentage of women, most of whom are thin and young and gorgeous already. Natalie Portman can look good no matter what her hairstyle is. I've also known a lot of women who impulsively tried a short cut, liked it for about a month, and then had to take years regrowing the hair they wished they had kept.

In theory, love should look past physical appearances. In practice, sex is a big part of romantic relationships, and physical appearance is a big part of sexual attraction. I'm still fairly young, so perhaps my feelings will change one day when I'm married for a decade and have little mes running around.

 

[MagicaPractica]

Guys, if you haven't said, "I love you" to your wife or girlfriend recently, do it now... *right now*. It's that important.

It's been five and a half months with my boyfriend and I'm still waiting to hear it for the first time. There are things he does and says that make me think he feels it but I need to hear the words. I don't want to push him to say it before he's ready but, yeah, it does hurt if I let myself think about it. Makes me afraid that he doesn't feel it.

 

[Boxlicker101]

As I recall, I told my wife I was quite fond of her just last year.

 

[driphoney]

As I recall, I told my wife I was quite fond of her just last year.

And if anything changes, you'll let her know?

As a hair challenged person, this whole thread gives me the willies. I once spent three years trying to get my hair from just above the shoulders to any where below the shoulders.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Dreams mean absolutely nothing, and making sense of them is about as pointless as making sense of the contents in your garbage can or toilet.

People have phobias associated with words and acts of love. I say I LOVE YOU a dozen times every day, but I wont send flowers to a woman. No way, Jose!

 

[Boxlicker101]

And if anything changes, you'll let her know?

As a hair challenged person, this whole thread gives me the willies. I once spent three years trying to get my hair from just above the shoulders to any where below the shoulders.

Of course, but any change is unlikely to happen.

 

[SeaCat]

Well shit.

For too many years my wife grew her hair. She spent hours a day fussing with it. It was absolutely beautiful. We're talking reddish blond hair that went down to her waist. Thick? Her braid was as big around as my wrist. I should know as I was the one who braided it on a daily basis.

One day she decided she wanted to try something different. She went into a Beauty Salon while we were in a local mall and got a hair cut. She donated a 36 inch long braid to Locks of Love. When she walked out her hair was all of a quarter inch long. She looked damned cute.

Now her hair is down to her shoulders and she's intent on growing it longer again.

My wifes hair is not why I love her. Nor is mine the reason she loves me. (She has seen me go from having it waist length to none to where it is now.)

I tell my wife I love her on a regular basis, too many time to count on a daily basis really. She does the same. Sometimes it gets embarassing but we don't give a shit.

Cat

If a persons hair or other physical attributes are the only reason their spouse is attached to them then they are well quit of the spouse.

 

[impressive]

Funny. I used to hear (and say) it several times a day -- on the phone. Now that we are living together? It's nowhere near as often. Not even daily.

 

[driphoney]

My wifes hair is not why I love her. Nor is mine the reason she loves me. (She has seen me go from having it waist length to none to where it is now.)

I tell my wife I love her on a regular basis, too many time to count on a daily basis really. She does the same. Sometimes it gets embarassing but we don't give a shit.

Cat

If a persons hair or other physical attributes are the only reason their spouse is attached to them then they are well quit of the spouse.

My faith in man is restored.