Some real feedback.

[Madman1597]

Hey folks. I put my first two stories up about ten days ago. They have had a reasonable amount of views (9461 combined) and a generous amount of votes. I've only received two feeback messages. 1 very positive and asking for a sequel. One complimenting the pacing but saying the sex was a bit ho-hum. I welcome all of these opinions and would like more. I will ask again what writers feel is the best format: 1st person narrative, third person subjective, present tense etcetera....... I have many stories in many genres and am currently editing them and deciding which ones to post.

Samples of my work are: TV Repair (Anal)
Carol Gives It Up (At Last) (Anal)

I look forward to any advice or comments.

Madman.

 

[ericlove]

http://www.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=54847

 

[MissTaken]

check your e mail

 

[Mickie]

In depth feedback -- do you mean someone who will critique your work? Check out the Story Discussion Circle Forum. We have a sign up for authors who want just this kind of thing. Each week we discuss a story, give in depth feedback, and the author responds with questions, etc.

We welcome as many participators as possible, both readers and writers alike!

Mickie

 

[daughter]

2 for 1

Madman--

I like your story. Initially the pacing was great. The tone was hilarious. Some minor errors with punctuation. Need to be consistence with figures. Write the numbers out. I'm still debating about some of the alliteration. My first thought was it was silly. Then I thought it accentuates the humor of the piece. I could see a twenty-four year old talking that way. Made me laugh.
By the time Andrew was fucking a bunch of married, middle-aged women I thought what a cool way to finish this off. But you didn't stop.

The climatic series of screwing for hire falls off and you go in another direction. Andrew's demeanor changes, the tone of the piece changes, and the piece is going on longer than I think is necessary. The second half is another story. I'd make it a sequel, though I have some reservations about that. There's considerable shift in the characters' dispositions and the tone.

I think you have two good stories here. I'd let the reader enjoy them as independent installments.

Thanks for the read.

Peace,

daughter