Soldier returns - hardcore fucking - grim past - help?

[thehotchip]

I have a half-written story where a guy who has been in the army for a long time finally returns home to his wife, and because he's been away for so long obviously they get down to some hardcore fucking! But soon the husband is having flashbacks of something that happened between him and his army buddies, an event he wants to forget but can't. I was thinking that him and his army buddies gang-raped a girl, and it transpires this seemingly nice and wholesome husband is actually a sex-mad brute. But I'd like to hear suggestions on how this story could be fleshed out, particularly in regards to the back story?

 

[bisexplicit]

You're walking into some rough territory.

First of all, lit doesn't allow extreme violence in stories.

Secondly, I can see myself as a reader being appalled by a gang rape scenario - doubly so if I'm reading the story for reasons eroticness.

Finally, this seems like a piece of fiction that might make an interesting character study, but probably isn't suited so well for somewhere like lit, where the readership is mostly looking for masturbation material.

I'm sorry for the negative comments, but they are things you should be aware of. Maybe other people will have some useful suggestions.

 

[GratefulFred]

I think that every person, including myself, has developed a unique perspective about the military life and how the adjustment to civilian life is sometimes difficult. Build your story of the conflicted soldier regardless of what the majority of Lit' readership may be looking for in wank-off material.

Here's an idea for you - The possabilities that the girl's father killed one of his army buddies and may be coming may add an element of suspense.

 

[Sean Renaud]

I was in the Military so I will be the first one to say that while I don't like seeing the military badly portrayed, I was and am willing to die for your right to burn the fuck out of us. With that said ANYTHING against the military here is going to get 1 positive comment for every 10 uber burns. And trust me it usually isn't worth it. I mean I can honestly say that some of the time I aim to piss people off It gets me off to know that what I did/said got under the skin of that many people.

I think that the basic idea behind the story is pretty good though.