So you're a tough assed biker huh?

SeaCat

Hey, my Halo is smoking
Joined
Sep 23, 2003
Posts
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So the wife and I were out doing some errands today when e happened to see a Biker come rumbling into the parking lot of the store we were in. He was a big burly dude swathed in his leathers. No helmet, his head and face protected only by his DO-Rag and Glasses. He parked his bike in front of the store and made sure to rev the engine a couple of times before shutting it down. He climbs off the bike and swaggers into the store past my wife and myself as we sat there enjoying our lunch.

A short while later he comes out and looks around before unloading his bags into his saddle bags. I couldn't help myself, I had to look at what he was buying. Beer? Hard Booze? Wings? None of the above. I watches as he loaded a couple of packages of Diapers, Baby Food and a small stuffed animal into his saddle bags. He saw me looking and nodded as he took in my own leathers and helmet.

Yep he was a bad assed Biker, Bad to the Bone. Heaven forgive the person who thought he wasn't man enough to buy diapers for his little one.

Cat
 
Yeah, but is he tough enough to buy tampons?

Snerk

Many a time I have stopped in a store to pick up the so called "Feminine Protection" products, (What is feminine Protection anyways? A Chartreus Flamethrower?) for who ever. It never bothered me in the least although it has caused some comedic moments.

The best was while I was living in Germany. I was coming in from the field when Mikki called and asked me to pick up some pads for her. I knew the P.X. was going to be closed so I pounded on the cab of the truck and told the driver to stop at the next store he saw. He peeled over and we stopped at a rather large place and unloaded.

All of us unassed the truck and went inside forgetting how we looked and smelled. (Hey we had been in the field for ten days.) B.D.U.'s, Turtle Back Armor, Helmets and weapons we invaded the store. The rest of the guys hit the Beer and Meats areas and I hit the feminine needs department.

When I hit the registers the young lady there gave me a double take. Here I was standing there in full kit, smelling like a rather nasty goat, and I had dropped in front of her a package of Pads and a large cup of coffee. In a very hesitant voice she asked if I was sure I needed the pads, which broke the other guys up. I looked at her and smiling told her they weren't for me they were for my lady and if she didn't get them there would be holy hell to pay.

She looked me up and down taking in my battle armor, my multiple weapons and my demeanor and finally shrugged while saying something about never wanting to meet the woman who could scare me. I laughed all the way to the truck and the guys gave me shit the rest of the way home. (Even as I swiped pieces of their snacks.)

The second funniest was when I was in High School. I had planned out a winter camping trip with a young lady I knew. We're talking I planned it out like a general planning a campaign. My pack weighed a ton, I had everything I thought would be needed. A couple of days later we were in a tent just below the Lions Mane on Mount Washington when she told me she had a problem. That time of month had hit a couple of days early and we now needed to leave. I looked at her and asked her if she thought I didn't plan on emergencies. I dug in my pack and pulled out a package of pads. To say she was stunned would be an understatement.

At first she asked me if I carried these on all my camping trips and I was tempted to tell her I usually carried a couple for emergencies. (They make great Abdominal Pads.) Instead I just told her the truth. I had been observing her actions for a while and knew she would be needing something like them soon.

It turned out to be an incredible camping trip.

Cat
 
where do you think big bad bikers come from

So the wife and I were out doing some errands today when e happened to see a Biker come rumbling into the parking lot of the store we were in. He was a big burly dude swathed in his leathers. No helmet, his head and face protected only by his DO-Rag and Glasses. He parked his bike in front of the store and made sure to rev the engine a couple of times before shutting it down. He climbs off the bike and swaggers into the store past my wife and myself as we sat there enjoying our lunch.

A short while later he comes out and looks around before unloading his bags into his saddle bags. I couldn't help myself, I had to look at what he was buying. Beer? Hard Booze? Wings? None of the above. I watches as he loaded a couple of packages of Diapers, Baby Food and a small stuffed animal into his saddle bags. He saw me looking and nodded as he took in my own leathers and helmet.

Yep he was a bad assed Biker, Bad to the Bone. Heaven forgive the person who thought he wasn't man enough to buy diapers for his little one.

Cat

First you're pulled around in a wagon. Then a tricycle. Your first bike with training wheels, etc. etc.

Perhaps you thought they were born w/ a HD hog?
 
Snerk


She looked me up and down taking in my battle armor, my multiple weapons and my demeanor and finally shrugged while saying something about never wanting to meet the woman who could scare me. ...

The second funniest ... incredible camping trip.

Cat

Eagle Scout!

Not many are.

The acid test is returning the wrong brand of tampons (because that's what we buy) and getting the right ones. ;)
 
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Yeah, but is he tough enough to buy tampons?

I bought them a few times for my second wife, but usually as part of a quantity of groceries. :cool: I thought that was easier than buying condoms from a young female drug store clerk. :eek:
 
I bought them a few times for my second wife, but usually as part of a quantity of groceries. :cool: I thought that was easier than buying condoms from a young female drug store clerk. :eek:

Of course if she said "Need some help putting those on, handsome?" it wouldn't bother me a bit. :D
 
Personally I have never had a problem buying tampons or pads for my SO, and have done it on many occasions. I dont see what the problem is for guys who refuse to do this for their ladies...I think its more 'macho' to do something for her than whine like a 2 yr old.
 
SeaCat said:
Many a time I have stopped in a store to pick up the so called "Feminine Protection" products, (What is feminine Protection anyways? A Chartreus Flamethrower?) for who ever. It never bothered me in the least although it has caused some comedic moments.

The best was while I was living in Germany. I was coming in from the field when Mikki called and asked me to pick up some pads for her. I knew the P.X. was going to be closed so I pounded on the cab of the truck and told the driver to stop at the next store he saw. He peeled over and we stopped at a rather large place and unloaded.

All of us unassed the truck and went inside forgetting how we looked and smelled. (Hey we had been in the field for ten days.) B.D.U.'s, Turtle Back Armor, Helmets and weapons we invaded the store. The rest of the guys hit the Beer and Meats areas and I hit the feminine needs department.

When I hit the registers the young lady there gave me a double take. Here I was standing there in full kit, smelling like a rather nasty goat, and I had dropped in front of her a package of Pads and a large cup of coffee. In a very hesitant voice she asked if I was sure I needed the pads, which broke the other guys up. I looked at her and smiling told her they weren't for me they were for my lady and if she didn't get them there would be holy hell to pay.

She looked me up and down taking in my battle armor, my multiple weapons and my demeanor and finally shrugged while saying something about never wanting to meet the woman who could scare me. I laughed all the way to the truck and the guys gave me shit the rest of the way home. (Even as I swiped pieces of their snacks.)

HAH! Mate, I came in off exercise, but I had to leave the longarm in the truck. Imagine this: Six guys in full camouflage - we still had the warpaint on, and it was a recce exercise, so we look like heavily armed trees - and I forgot to take my sidearm out of its holster, I'm carrying two knives, one of the guys has a freaking axe strapped to his belt. We call him Viking. He's six three, blonde, practically benchpresses five tonner trucks for a living. The name fits.

So we're in this suburban drugstore, and the attendant - petite brunette girl - is pressed up against the back of the counter completely pale, a centimeter away from freaking out. I should mention at this point, three of the guys are speaking Russian, one of them has been awake for close to three days, and one has a training LAAW strapped over the top of his asspack.

Now, I'm a good boyfriend. I'm also a little bitch, according to my alternate team leader. My girl was out of town, so I brought a list of shit she'd left on the counter, things I should pick up before I go back to the house. It's all pretty standard. I add laundry detergent to the list - like I said, it had been a recce ex. Become one with Mother Earth. On the list, tampons. And pads. So I go and get these, we go through the checkout, and the cashier is finally starting to calm down.

Then I put a box of tampons and a box of pads on the checkout and she gives me the best bewildered look I'll ever see in my life. My ATL is snickering. I tell him to shut his face - in Russian - and turn back to the poor cashier, who has just had a fully cammed, knife-bearing, pistol-toting recce snap at another knife-laden pistol-toting walking tree in a foreign language directly in front of her, and say: "Yes miss, I am going to need those. In a bag, please. If I don't get them, I am going to die when I get home." Maybe she responds to stress with humour. I got: "What, are you married to an East German?" as a response.

sutherngent985 said:
Personally I have never had a problem buying tampons or pads for my SO, and have done it on many occasions. I dont see what the problem is for guys who refuse to do this for their ladies...I think its more 'macho' to do something for her than whine like a 2 yr old.

Exactly. It's like buying condoms. So many people are embarrassed to buy condoms. I have no idea why: that, more than anything else, indicates you're about to get some. Why be embarrassed about that?
 
I can proudly say that I can buy diapers, tampons, condoms, and pregnancy tests without flinching.
 
Exactly. It's like buying condoms. So many people are embarrassed to buy condoms. I have no idea why: that, more than anything else, indicates you're about to get some. Why be embarrassed about that?

I joked with the old lady across the counter about getting some with a smile on both our faces the last time I went to buy condoms.
On August 24, 1995...
 
I can proudly say that I can buy diapers, tampons, condoms, and pregnancy tests without flinching.

If you do a little more "condom buying", you would prolly do a lot less "diaper and pregnancy test" buying... just saying. :D
 
Wife and 3 daughters, wonder what I got at the store? :rolleyes:
By the way, that many women in one house and they do get on the same cycle, it's not a rumor. :eek:
 
If you do a little more "condom buying", you would prolly do a lot less "diaper and pregnancy test" buying... just saying. :D

I did things in reverse. Pregnancy test, diapers, then lot of condoms. Now i find most women have their own condoms on hand.
 
There can be problems with the 'tough assed biker' image. I knew a Harley rider some time back. Every day it was a 'builder' workout with max resistance. The result was bulging biceps, shoulders out to here and a really macho swagger. Unfortunately, it ruined the girl's social life.
 
Wife and 3 daughters, wonder what I got at the store? :rolleyes:
By the way, that many women in one house and they do get on the same cycle, it's not a rumor. :eek:
Makes me glad I didnt have daughters...1 female in the house with PMS is quite enough thank you.
 
There can be problems with the 'tough assed biker' image. I knew a Harley rider some time back. Every day it was a 'builder' workout with max resistance. The result was bulging biceps, shoulders out to here and a really macho swagger. Unfortunately, it ruined the girl's social life.

Beer Spew.

Thanks for the chuckle.

Cat
 
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